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f!wangxian get up to shenanigans and Meng Yao gets nice things
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"Because my inventions are fuckoff terrifying and can end the war sooner and I need the war ended sooner rather than later." 

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"...Not...that I'm not in favor of the Wens ceasing to be a threat to Lotus Pier sooner, but it sounds like you're saying you have a more specific reason than that." 

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"So, some of the extremely terrifying talismans I have didn't pan out, and some of them involve fucking with the human body, and some of those overlap, and sometimes research goes off on weird tangents, and, uh, long story short I got Lan Zhan pregnant in a freak magic accident back at the Unclean Realm after we escaped from Nightless City and I really, really need my kid not to be born in a war zone." 

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"You know, if someone told me last year 'someday, a girl is going to get another girl pregnant, by accident," I would have immediately guessed it was you. If you're the dad, does that mean you guys are going to come live at Lotus Pier." 

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"A-Cheng, we can't make important life decisions like that based on me fucking up at talismans! We are going to sit down and talk about it, at some point, and decide, that hasn't changed." 

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Sigh. "Fair. Well, it definitely means the kid's name should be Wei." 

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"What if I find the talisman in my notes and we decide to use it again--eventually, when things are settled down--and I get pregnant? It's more important that the kids' names match than that they get the non-gestating mother's name." 

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"The name should still be Wei. You have a brother, Lan-guniang," he nods to his sister-in-law-to-be, "there aren't any other Weis." 

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"Thaaaat is a separate discussion though." 

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"Fine, fine. Go, we can manage without you, I guess." 

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"Thanks. I love you, A-Cheng, best shidi ever." 

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"Love you too, Shijie, give the Wens hell from me." 

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"Will do!" 

(As they leave, Jiang Cheng can be spotted taking out a new sheet of paper, writing "How to become the favorite uncle" and looking at it thoughtfully.)

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Kiss. That went very well.

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Yes it did. Kiss. 

"How do you think your brother's going to react? I mean, given that he, you know, knows..." 

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She doesn't know. "He will worry. But Brother will not be angry."

Uncle probably will. Lan Zhan has been trying not to think about that, but it is brought up often by her nightmares.

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"Madam Yu's not going to be impressed, if she's alive...is your uncle going to be a problem. Should we enlist your brother to make your uncle be less of a problem, he's the Sect Leader after all." 

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"I will handle it." She doesn't know how, exactly, but Wei Ying certainly shouldn't worry over it.

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"Handle it like how. Are you sure blaming me isn't the best plan, he already hates me." 

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"Mmm."

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"Lan Zhan." 

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She's being very reasonable!! "I will request Brother's advice."

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"Okay good." Cheeksmooch. 

Wei Ying just needs to gather up the talisman notes she had out to work on and then she's ready to go.

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Lan Zhan says goodbye to some of the children, and then off they go to the front. Fwoooosh.

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