"I could turn surfacey first! Probably wouldn't help. It never helps."

"What, never?"

"I mean, it's possible that the times I've tried it, it has in fact averted some incidents, but I don't notice a statistical net improvement. Either elves are just as weird in any color, or surface elves aren't weird and people expect me to act like one and I don't know how, and especially don't know their friend so-and-so the surface elf even though they are sure everyone with pointy ears has met him."

"Knew a couple of elves growing up. Tutors. They seemed - not that weird. Maybe they were weird and I just had a weird baseline. Maybe people are just dicks."

"A tutor's pretty filtered. And would've adjusted to you rather than expecting you to meet them halfway. They were there to teach - the language? That all?"

"Nah. History, geopolitics, elf culture stuff."

"Ooh, elf culture, what's that like?"

"It was mostly specific to Kyonin and the Osirian expats from Kyonin. Learned about their gods and stuff, their government, their relations with their neighbors, problems they had with Osirian law..."

"Did they have a lot of that last?"

"Didn't say I paid attention. Uh, we have a bunch of laws that reference specific ages and they were annoyed we hadn't changed all the laws to specify the relevant and different ages for elves."

"Ha, I guess that would be annoying for elves with kids."

"I mean, if marrying off your twenty-year-old Elf is ill-advised you can just not do that. I think it was causing problems in a couple of places? I really spent my whole education trying not to pay attention, though, I was scared Abadar'd get ideas."

"Makes sense."

"The marriage law is nineteen, or sixteen with special approval. In Qadira it's fourteen so we feel very civilized by comparison."

"Wow, the ability to get married of the ability to get married of the ability to get married of my ability to get married can get married."

"Well, you can hardly get married past twenty two or twenty three!"

"Speak for yourself!"

"Not having married any women I have to admit I don't know what changes between twenty-three and twenty-four."

"That's when I learned to write!"

"Ah, that's probably it. Marry a literate woman and you'll never find marital bliss."

"It'd explain a lot."

"Maaaaybe drow can make it work with an illiterate man."

"We don't systematically skew the educational system that far but I'd believe it's happened, if he's pretty."

"Huh, really? Osirion can't afford to educate everyone and the boys are the obvious subcategory to go for, figured it'd be the other way around."

"Slaves. We don't educate the slaves. There are a lot."