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I predict this will be a self-indulgent shippy meditation on power and responsibility but it's honestly hard to predict these threads
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Spell: Following

You can make people first-level clerics of you.

To learn this spell, take the hand of someone eligible to be your cleric. Say, goloptywimple. Give them a valuable gift.

 

Spell: Resistance

You have some ability to ignore magical effects directed at you. 

To learn this spell, cast another spell on yourself. As you do so, say, Jempi. Katsafgha.

 

Spell: Hold Person

You can cast the spell Hold Person at will.

To learn this spell, touch someone. Say, Enefti. Freb.

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He gets back "Ugggggh yeah okay I can buy one gimme like thirty minutes."

(She's awake but has neglected to leave her bed yet.)

"Apparently the new me needs a pregnancy test," she mumbles to Connor.

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"Huh. I feel like if she was dating someone she would've mentioned?"

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"Yeah it seems weird? But presumably we can get a rundown later. One of us should probably buy the thing now, I guess."

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"Where do they sell them?"

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"Walmart, probably, pharmacy section."

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"I can do that."

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Kiss. "You're very good. Please do."

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So he goes to Walmart and gets stuck on account of his inability to read and asks a pharmacy tech for help.

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The pharmacy tech can direct him to the correct place!

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Then he can get it and pay for it! And tip to make up the difference between what fairy thinks the thing is worth and what the store does.

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The cashier rings it up and puts the extra money in the little bucket for donating to hurricane victims. "For your girlfriend?"

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"Sort of? She's not pregnant but she has a magical demiplane where she's been collecting alternate universe versions of herself and some of them are grownups and one of them wanted it."

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" - okay."

She puts it in a little bag for him.

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He takes it home.

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She has gotten dressed and is making waffles.

She thanks Connor and takes the bag and attempts to summon Hagan to her house.

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This works! He looks slightly startled but recovers quickly.

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"Sorry! I didn't actually bring a wand of Sending with me. Which was dumb. Everything okay?"

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"As far as I know, yeah."

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Nod. She hands him the bag. "It's this thing in the box. Valentine'll be able to read the instructions to her, I think."

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"Okay. I'll - let you know if we need anything else, I guess."

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Nodnod. "Please do." 

And she sends him back.

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He takes his bag over to the new Imrainai.

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" - hi. Is this - "

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"It's a pregnancy test, I think, my world doesn't have them. Uh, if you need help, or people to look after the baby or anything, there's lots of people here who can help -"

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"I don't even know if there is one. Might be imagining things. Being paranoid, or something."

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