"You know," she says, into the silence, "I think it's okay to just... want to think about something else, for a little while."

"...I don't know..."

Feeling miserable at least feels like she's not making light of someone dying.

She rubs her shoulder.  "You can say whatever you're thinking, I won't - judge you.  If that helps to hear.  I think... I really think you didn't do anything wrong."

"I think I did."

"It was self-defense, wasn't it?"

"I. I don't know."

"They would've killed you."

"I know. Just..."

Hug hug.

"I think.  That.  Just because you can imagine a way everything could've gone perfectly, after the fact... that doesn't necessarily mean... that it's true, or even that you're a bad person for not being perfect.  And I think that - a lot lot more of the awfulness of what happened is located in the situation you're in, than in anything you did about it, if that makes sense."

"...Maybe. I. That makes sense?" It's a hard thought to have, almost painful when she's this mad at herself.

Tentative but encouraging smile.  "I'm glad."

Tiny smile. Pensive cuddles.

Breakfast passes, and lunch, in light conversation or pensive silence.

That afternoon, there's a knock at their door.

"Come in," Nausicaa calls.

Giles eases the door open.  "I came to check on you.  How are you feeling?"

"Better physically. Still working on emotionally."

"As far as physically goes, I'm glad to hear it.  ...I think you and I should - debrief - soon.  It's wiser not to wait too long, and... it may help you."

"...Maybe. Yeah. And we can figure out - what to do next time."

"Indeed, that's one of the most important parts of a debrief.  Now... would you like Kaylee to stay, for... emotional support?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

Squeeze.

"Very good.  Now, the purpose of a debrief is to review the events of a mission, or in this case a series of missions, so that we can examine what happened, what we can anticipate happening in the future because of it, what information we've gained that might be relevant to future missions, and, as you pointed out, any mistakes we may have made or opportunities we can find to do better on our next missions."

She nods.

"So I should go slow, maybe, so we can go over each piece one at a time?"

"Precisely.  And also so that we can both take notes."  He gestures with a pair of notebooks he brought with him.  "I'll also be going over my memories of the mission with you, since I was there for some of it, and we can compare to produce as accurate a reconstruction as we can."