"And the kind of being we are is a kind that is, uh, only conscious if we're believed in."

Tholassi closes his eyes and prepares himself for death.

It doesn't come. 

Sataro presses his palms into his eyes and sighs. "Okay. So there are no demons, and you're trapped as a salamander because I'm the only person who actually believes in you, and you want to go to Tarev — why." 

"I don't know if you've seen, but I kind of have an entire country full of worshipers. It's not that I only have one believer. It's that for some reason I can't access all the belief I have."

He is reminded involuntarily of Ashka, but — Kirasu exists. Sataro is clearly, obviously, not the only one.

He nods. "Right." 

"And if you want an answer to a question about gods there's no better place to go than Tarev."

He nods again. 

"Clearly some enemy god is doing some sort of action to oppose me, and once I find out who it is they are going to regret it."

"I'm sure." 

"And then there are going to be some new commandments, about how impure it is for people's insides to go to the outside of their bodies, and about making sure to feed any salamanders you come across the nice meat."

Sataro smiles and lets his shoulders relax. 

"And eating enough food if you are a prophet. Probably also if you're not a prophet, I can't have my believers dying on me."

.....he's not relaxed anymore. 

"What is it?"

"It's nothing." 

(it's not nothing) it's nothing. 

"I can read your mind."

"I'd noticed." 

"So what is it that you're so concerned about?"

"...I don't know," he says honestly. 

"To be quite frank you're not the prophet I would have chosen," Tholassi says, "and I suspect that's quite deliberate, but I'm an honorable god and if you return me to my usual state I will keep you as my prophet with the perks that implies. You can"-- he searches through Sataro's head for a good bribe-- "have a nice indoor job with no heavy lifting? forbid the Inquisition from carrying out its current activities? have sex with Kirasu? have sex with Kirasu and Ashka both?"

"— um!" 

Obviously he is going to return Tholassi to his usual state, because Tholassi is his God, not because — not because of that — 

"That's not even hard," Tholassi says, "they're both hopelessly in love with you. The Prophet Rathenu liked a girl and I had to mind-control her to get her to the altar."

— and that is a totally separate issue that he will deal with at a totally separate time, it's still disgusting that he would even want —

"Oh, don't worry about it, I just forbade it because it makes humans feel better to hear a lot of sermons against a sin almost none of them actually want to commit."

He is not going to scream. 

He is not going to throw anything. He is not going to turn and punch a wall, he is not going to do anything stupid and rash that he'd have to explain to anyone who saw. 

He is not. 

"Uh," Tholassi says. "--This is really more distressed than most humans are when a god grants the most secret desires of their heart."