spike makes a wish and everyone ends up in 1860s london
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He relaxes noticeably once they're clear of the city. He still doesn't talk to her. 

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We gonna stop, like, before we hit Scotland?

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I dunno where Scotland is but if stopping was the plan you picked the wrong person to follow around. 

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She is so tired. She's already been beaten up and already stayed up at least twenty-four hours by now. She's not sure that ignoring this is a viable plan, but complaining about it doesn't seem super viable either, so she guesses that that's what she's doing for now.

 

You realize that you're on an island, right?

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Why d'you think that?

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'Cause we're in England, judging from the accents and the bits of conversation I caught back in town, and England is an island. I'm not sure exactly how big it is, but at some point you're gonna hit water.

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He comes to a halt. Why am I invested in your survival, exactly?

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'Cause - 'cause completely ignoring the judgement of your future self, who has for some reason spent the last year training me how to do stuff - I think that we're still in danger from whatever brought us here, and I think I have a slightly better idea what's going on than you do, and if I hadn't literally ten hours ago been almost killed then I'd be able to watch your back if anything attacked you, which it probably will, given past experience, and you don't speak English and I think it's pretty hard to gain passage on a boat to anywhere that isn't an island if you don't speak the language. And - probably I'll think of other things later but it's hard right now because of - literally everything about this situation.

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What do you think brought us here?

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I - don't know, exactly, but my gut says it's probably related to the being beaten up ten hours ago. That was by a vampire who - wow, I'm stupid, a vampire who was turned in the late 1800s in England, and whose partner was turned in 1860, also in England, which is I think about when and where we are. I'd have to grab a newspaper to be sure. I don't think it's a coincidence, though.

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All right, tell me about vampires.

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She takes a deep breath. Doesn't cry.

Vampires are humans who have been killed and possessed by demons. They drink human or animal blood, though usually they go for humans because it's tastier and they're almost universally evil. They can be killed by beheading them, staking them through the heart with a piece of wood, exposing them to sunlight or fire, or by submerging them in holy water. They are otherwise immortal. They can't enter human residences without an invitation; Quendi don't count. They are immune to mind reading. I've killed ninety-seven and have captured - I think six of them, now.

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And I've never heard of them because -

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Well, you don't pay attention to humans, so.

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- yeah, all right.

 

I'll kill things for you, if they're really out there. I just - don't want you getting attached.

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Kind of late for that. You're sort of the only person I've ever met who wasn't just poofed out of existence. Other than maybe this one dog, I guess. But I can - it's whatever. You don't owe me anything just 'cause your future self made decisions.

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Haven't got any idea why, is the thing. It's not like I was thinking, you know, if only there were magic demon-fighting girls, then I'd have everything I wanted.

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Well. I needed help killing stuff and not getting killed, and you're really good at it. It worked out pretty well. You - you liked it, I think, teaching me to kill stuff and teaching other kids how not to get killed during your day job. You were a gym teacher, you taught self-defense. You were really really good at it.

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Well, yeah. He starts walking again, but towards the nearest trees instead of straight away from the city. That doesn't - that doesn't really explain why.

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Oh, thank God. She follows.

I dunno. 

 

We were talking about why we did anything we did, once, and you said - I don't remember exactly. You said you tried ignoring all of the world's problems for a long time, and it sucked, and it was better to do something. 

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We tried fixing all the world's problems for a long time and that sucked, too. 

He pulls out a knife and starts cutting down a sapling, singing to himself in Quenya.

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I dunno, then. Maybe you got bored.

She pokes at herself and lifts her shirt up some and tries to reassess the overall level of damage she's dealing with, given that there are apparently not going to be any beds or days off in her near future. 

Walking didn't help, but I think I should still patch up in a day or two, as long as I get to sleep a normal amount for once.

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You can sleep. What hit you?

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Vampire. Really strong one. A bunch of them attacked us both when we were in different locations. You took out a bunch of yours, but I got locked in a room with a dozen of them and the leader challenged me to single combat. Didn't go so great. Went worse for him than for me, though, some other people ended up taking him out and getting him to a government facility. I think you - I dunno. You left to question him and then you came back and told me not to die.

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He's whittling this tree into a longbow. You heal faster than most humans?

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