So apparently one of the hot guys is straight! And that leaves only two guys he could potentially actually kiss oh god he is going to die. 

Lev is trying really hard not to think about what Sasha would look like sucking his cock while wearing makeup, and absolutely not succeeding.

"She already sounds great." 

The curly-haired boy looks kind of cute and also a little bit like he's about to burst. "And you?" 

Oh god oh god Sasha is talking to him he is actually going to die oh god.

"Uh. I'm Lev? I-- decided to come here? Because I couldn't fix myself on my own."

He's bright red.

"...oh, honey." His face and voice have gone very soft. 

He cringes.

"It's-- fine. I mean it's what we're all here for, right? Getting better?"

"I am here because the decision was made too late for me to get my GED and move out and go to college a year early instead." 

"I'm here because I can't afford to pay rent in New York City by myself."

"...Lev is right," he says, very quietly. 

Positive attention from cute (gay) (he's actually gay) (oh god he's gay) guys is terrifying!

"Well, if you guys want to stop being gay, that's fine, but if Sasha wants to suck other guys' cocks while wearing makeup that's also fine, and I am heterosexual and could not possibly stop being gay even if I wanted to."

Sasha really hopes that however they're grouped he's in a group with Asher. 

Marlo doesn't comment on whether or not it is fine to want to suck cock while wearing makeup; this isn't the time or the place. 

"Are the people who run this camp going to show up at some point, do you think?" 

As if summoned, Christine Parker appears.

"Hello, everyone!" Christine Parker says. "Welcome to True Directions. We're going to have an orientation in the group therapy room, and then I'll show you to your dorm so you can get unpacked and get ready for dinner."

He follows Christine to the group therapy room, doesn't talk to anyone on the way there. 

The group therapy room has off-white hospital-style walls and massively uncomfortable chairs.

"The first step in recovery from homosexuality is admitting that you have a problem. Some of you"-- her eyes linger on Asher-- "have more trouble with this than others. So we'll begin orientation by going around the room and saying our names and an interesting fact or two about ourselves, and then saying 'I'm a homosexual.' I'll start. My name is Christine Parker, I like riding horses and organizing people's closets, and I used to be a homosexual."

The first three go. Andre, actor, dancer, homosexual. Clayton, who works retail and is a homosexual. Dolph, varsity wrestler and homosexual.

"My name is Marlo, I do track and field, and I'm a homosexual." 

"My name is Sasha, I do a whole bunch of weird crafty things and have strong opinions about Shakespeare, and I'm super gay." 

"Alexander, we'd prefer you go by 'Alexander' or 'Alex' while you're at camp. And the appropriate term is not 'super gay.'"

"I am almost one hundred percent sure that the rules did not say 'you'll have to change your name if we don't like that you're Russian,' but fine. My name is Alexander, I also go by Sasha, I do a whole bunch of weird crafty things, and I'm a homosexual." 

"My name's Lev. I'm on the math team and the robotics team. And I"-- he squeaks and turns bright red-- "Iamahomosexual."

(It's the first time he's ever actually said it.)

"My name is Asher. I'm a dancer and I have good taste in poetry and horrible taste in musicals. And I--"

He hesitates. He's not going to get out of here without saying it. It's a lie, but-- if he spends three months telling the truth, that he's straight, then he'll never get to go to New York.

"I am a homosexual."

Oh no, Lev is cute. 

"All right! Now I'm going to hand out your binders. Take one and pass them along."

When everyone has their binders, Christine says:

"On the first page, you'll see the five steps here at True Directions. First, admitting you're a homosexual, which some of you have finished right now. Round of applause for everyone!"

Yeah, he's been doing that for years. He doesn't clap. 

Neither does he; he's looking ahead in the binder.