Well, that is absolutely terrifying. 

Much to his surprise, Lev talks incessantly during movies. Maybe he would have known that if he had ever actually watched a movie with a person before.

That's.....probably a good thing. 

It's been a while since he watched this. The way the communist rebels in the woods are presented is still correct given the context, but it — itches, now, in a way it didn't before. He keeps remembering things he'd rather not remember. He fears the Pale Man more than he hates him, this time around. 

Lev is getting so incredibly cuddled. 

"This movie is terrifying," Lev says, holding on tightly to Sasha. "And also pretty. Terrifyingly pretty. Prettily terrifying."

"Much like you," he does not add.

He holds tightly back. "It is." 

In the second half, once Ofelia's mother dies, the horror largely stops being fantasy monsters and starts being human. Personal. He doesn't let go of Lev. 

Lev stops talking, puts his head into Sasha's shoulder, and makes sniffling noises.

"Yeah," Sasha says softly, and pets his hair. "Me too." 

The ending is bittersweet but triumphant. Sasha has cried every time he's watched this movie and this time is no different. 

Lev was quietly having a panic attack about crying at a movie (probably it was weird? and overemotional? and would make Sasha hate him?) and so he feels a lot better when Sasha also starts crying. 

He wants to kiss Sasha to tell Sasha he loves him to kiss Sasha's hair to tell Sasha he's beautiful to watch another movie. 

Edith shows up with the grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup. 

Oh good, food. Something to focus on other than the movie, and the previous times he's watched it and the previous people he's watched it with. 

It's still, objectively, a very good movie. He kind of wishes he hadn't told Lev it was his favorite, though. 

He leans against Lev and eats. 

Meanwhile, in the kitchen: 

"They were definitely cuddling," Edith says. "I think they're dating."

"But who is he?" Shelly asks. "He's nice-- and cute-- but when would Lev ever have met someone?"

"Online, maybe?" Edith asks. 

"Bit weird that they didn't meet in person before we had to renovate the side of the house so he could move in," Shelly opines. "I hope he's not some golddigger out to steal Lev's money."

"He's bad at feelings, he's not bad at money, I'm sure there's"-- Edith gestures vaguely-- "a prenup or something. Or whatever you call a prenup for moving in."

"I just don't want him to be taken advantage of," Shelly says. "Which is probably kind of ironic given the number of hours I work versus the number of hours I bill, but--"

"That's not what 'irony' means," Edith says, "if you want to be a writer you have to learn what 'irony' means. What you're doing is called 'hypocrisy.'"

"I really liked the movie," Lev says, "but I am going to have so many nightmares tonight. The Pale Man. Ugh."

"Yeah, I did too the first time I watched it." 

He looks at Lev's face and figures he might as well see what he says. "The last two weeks were the first time in years I've slept in a bed alone, it still feels weird." 

On some level, he knows that Sasha is trying to give him what he wants, because there is so much money at stake, and he can't know whether Sasha is telling the truth about never sleeping alone or even about wanting to sleep with him.

On another level, he's not sure he cares.

"Do you want to sleep in my bed tonight?" 

"I didn't even know he was gay," Edith complains.

"He's obviously gay," Shelly says. "He's read Dykes to Watch Out For. No straight man has read Dykes To Watch Out For."

"He likes comics!"

"He has Venom shelved under 'LGBT comics'!"

Alex, the driver, who has mostly been scrolling through Twitter on his phone, puts in, "Are we sure he's gay? Sasha kind of looks like a really weird girl."

Edith and Shelly whirl and glare at Alex. "That's rude," Edith says. 

"Don't misgender people," Shelly says. "Sasha might be trans or he might just be androgynous but either way he was introduced to us as a he and therefore he is a man."

"Okay, okay," Alex says, "sheesh."

"I'd like that, yeah." He leans a little heavier on Lev. "My room is amazing, I'm just — adjusting to having one." 

"I'm happy to help you adjust! It's going to be... non-euphemistic sleeping together, though."

"That's fine! I would have been surprised if it wasn't, honestly, you circled 'no' very emphatically." 

aaaaaahhhh why did he say that what if lev does want him to shut up, brain. 

"Yeah, it's just. Not my thing," he blatantly lies.

He is willing to pay someone to pretend to like him and to want to cuddle with him and watch movies and talk about books and eat dinner together and notice whether he dies. That's-- it's fine, it's okay, it's better than not having any of that, he's grateful that he's wealthy enough that he can get his emotional needs met on the free market, there are lots of people who are lonely and they're just lonely and there's nothing anyone can do to fix it. 

But the thought of having sex with someone and knowing that they're just doing it for money and they're pretending to like you and want you is the most horrifying thing he can imagine. He would rather die. He is just going to be a kissless virgin forever.

....he got hard when Sasha hugged him. 

Whatever. Not his business. Well, kind of his business, but not his business in a way that makes it a good thing to poke at right now. "I...might at some point sleep with other people, euphemistically, if that's okay with you? Not soon, and I can deal with being celibate if you'd rather I do that but it wouldn't come easily." 

That is horrible and it makes Lev want to curl up into a little ball and sob. But it's not-- it's not fair to demand that Sasha be celibate, it's not fair to demand that Sasha not get to be with someone he actually loves.

"Of course, it's fine," he says and smiles. He's a good liar these days. Claire is the only one who ever catches him and she's too professional to say anything.

He doesn't catch the lie. 

"Mmm. That's all I was going to ask. If you don't want me to fall asleep here we should probably head to your room." 

"We should probably go then." He doesn't move.

Awwwww he's going to have to be responsible. 

"Alright, c'mon," and he gets up, takes Lev's hand. 

"Mrf," Lev says, but responsibly stands up and walks in the direction of his bedroom.

His bedroom has an enormous bed and a dresser and books and papers that used to be piled everywhere on the floor but, thanks to Shelly's intervention, have been neatly piled near the door instead. 

Wow, that bed is really very enormous. 

Sasha heads into the bathroom and runs a scrap of paper over his teeth, which isn't ideal but it's whatever, and strips down to his boxers. It's not like Lev isn't going to know where the scars came from. 

"Do you need to brush your teeth or-- oh."

Lev stares at him with his mouth open. That is not the look of a person who doesn't want to have sex with Sasha. 

(he's beautiful he's beautiful oh god he's so beautiful--)