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This is a successor to "call me maybe", which is getting crowded.
Cam is dipping a grilled cheese sandwich into a bowl of tomato soup when he feels the summons. He goes ahead and grabs it. Doesn't even drop the sandwich.
from_scratch
bitterchill
Ding!
The penthouse is reached. Ari unlocks the door to a very nice (if desperately tackily decorated) apartment. "Honey, I'm home!" he calls.
The penthouse is reached. Ari unlocks the door to a very nice (if desperately tackily decorated) apartment. "Honey, I'm home!" he calls.
quite-enchanted
"I am so very much not at all your honey," returns a voice cheerfully. A woman walks out of what looks to be her study to greet him.
Upon noticing Cam, she freezes for a moment before stretching her lips into a welcoming smile. "Um, who's- this? Hello."
Upon noticing Cam, she freezes for a moment before stretching her lips into a welcoming smile. "Um, who's- this? Hello."
from_scratch
"Hello. I'm Cam. Your friend here just had a near-lifetime-coma-experience and I'm having a hell of a time convincing him not to share around information on how to replicate it without slowing down and talking it over."
quite-enchanted
She relaxes. "Oh, good. I thought he'd decided to introduce me to his boyfriend or something."
quite-enchanted
She raises an eyebrow, but declines to comment.
"Anyway, what's this about near-comas? Because Ari generally doesn't like people getting put in comas. It's kind of a thing with him. Who was he planning to tell besides me?"
"Anyway, what's this about near-comas? Because Ari generally doesn't like people getting put in comas. It's kind of a thing with him. Who was he planning to tell besides me?"
from_scratch
"I don't remember the entity's name. Ari accidentally summoned a random demon - or, let's call me an apsel, you reportedly have different demons here - he accidentally summoned a random apsel. I had the quickest reaction time on this occasion but he could have gotten anybody who felt like going for a jaunt about the mortal realm, however mistaken they would have proven about the identity of said mortal realm, and they would have been delightedly surprised to land ungagged and unbound. If a summoner dies their summoned daeva get sent back, so an apsel who wanted to have some fun would have merely rendered Ari unconscious, and then gone and done whatever. I'm a nice friendly apsel. I am only slightly out of the ordinary for apsels in general but I am a huge outlier as apsels who take summonses go."
quite-enchanted
She pauses for a while, for processing purposes.
"...So, potential horror avoided. Thank you for not being unpleasant. I doubt he was going to tell me, or anyone, to summon random unbound apsels. Again, he doesn't really like comas and mayhem. And I'm guessing that he assumed that was implicit, but you don't know him from Adam, so it wasn't. But allow me to clarify that summoning sprees weren't on the menu. Ari is not malicious or an idiot. All appearances to the contrary."
"...So, potential horror avoided. Thank you for not being unpleasant. I doubt he was going to tell me, or anyone, to summon random unbound apsels. Again, he doesn't really like comas and mayhem. And I'm guessing that he assumed that was implicit, but you don't know him from Adam, so it wasn't. But allow me to clarify that summoning sprees weren't on the menu. Ari is not malicious or an idiot. All appearances to the contrary."
from_scratch
"I didn't expect him to instruct anyone to summon random unbound apsels, but it's not complicated if you have the basic idea."
quite-enchanted
"Ari not being malicious or an idiot includes not telling people whose immediate reaction to 'this creature is extremely powerful and most would likely put you in a coma immediately' is 'ooh, I want to summon one!'"
from_scratch
"Yes, but Ari's only available example did not put him in a coma immediately. Ari thought his available example was cool. You see my problem."
quite-enchanted
"You are badly misunderstanding the nature of my roommate. He thinks that everything is 'cool'. That does not mean that he doesn't realize that it is incredibly dangerous. He chooses to be blasé about dangers passed, but believe me when I say that he is fully aware of them. At the very least, he would never do something stupid without consulting me first."
from_scratch
"Sure. Your roommate did not understand that I did not understand the nature of your roommate and started threatening me."
quite-enchanted
"I apologize. He was raised by a sociopath and lacks a mode of socialization that doesn't involve weaponized escalation. He's very sorry, and if I thought it'd help I'd whack him with a newspaper."
quite-enchanted
"Anyway. Would you like a cup of something or other? We've got a ridiculous amount of tea, or there's hot chocolate."
from_scratch
"My magical apsel properties include being able to make arbitrary matter. But I'd take a mug, I don't like making new dishes every time I decide to ingest things."
quite-enchanted
"Mugs are in steady supply!" She flits into the kitchen and returns with a mug bearing the legend #1 Grandpa!, which she hands to Cam. (She also brings a cup of fruity-smelling tea, which she may have already had steeping, and sips at it.)
quite-enchanted
"Oh, it's no trouble! So, apparently you're a nice apsel who doesn't put people in comas. What do you plan to do instead? Also, would you like to stay here, since Ari's the one who summoned you? We've got a spare room and all."
from_scratch
"Maybe. Once I am reasonably sure that the key information is not going to be carelessly deployed by this vector I might also fuck off and terraform Mars and visit the NIH and - are your bees in trouble? This year in the other mortal world I know the bees were in trouble."