"Yass!" Lan punches the air, and leans to the side to grab one of the remotes for the television.

"Please be aware, you have activated my commentary mode. I will provide a running commentary, and it will not be particularly flattering."

Lan meanwhile, is navigating them to the appropriate channel. "She will make shameless judgement calls on all of the characters and their actions."

Percy snuggles up. "I wouldn't expect any less. What's the twenty word synopsis of this telenovela?"

"This one? In a shocking twist of stereotypes, two women are literally dueling for a man's affections. He meanwhile, is seeing the gardener."

"Is the gardener cute?"

"Cuter than either of the girls, to be quite honest."

"How sad for our Heroines. Specially, because 'Chelle will sure be merciless."

"I respect a woman's right to challenge her love rival to a duel. Just like. Make sure the person you're competing over is actually available?"

"Duels are sufficiently non-spontaneous that one would assume that. Is the love interest in the closet, at least?"

"Trying desperately to get out of it actually! No-one believes him."

"Oh, my god. That sounds great."

'Chelle pokes him playfully. "Traitor! I needed you on my side! Now Lan is going to use you as an excuse to watch this!" She doesn't, in the grand scheme of things, seem all that bothered.

"I am so sorry, I can't help it. Hard to ignore this kind of quality content once it's introduced to me."

"I'm doomed!" 'Chelle declares.

"Hush," Lan says, not too seriously. "It's starting."

Percy snuggles up to watch.

Snuggles!

And on the screen, the drama plays out.

'Chelle, as promised, provides scathing commentary on the characters (except the gardener, who she seems to at least tactictly approve of).

Aaren eventually meanders in, smells of cooking and baking wafting after him. He squints at the screen, before flopping into the armchair. "So, has Étienne convinced Fleur and Delphine that the love of his life is in fact Gaël? Or are they still intent on dueling each other?"

"No and yes. Étienne managed to convince Delphine that he can only use Gaël's flowers at his wedding. Delphine failed to capture the essence of who he wants to marry with. I have no idea what's going with Fleur, but that she needs to relax."

"My theory is she's ace but hasn't figured that out yet, and has all these dumb expectations placed on her to get married and have kids."

"I see what you mean, but I am not sure about the married part. She could be read as ace, but no aro. She does appear enthusiastic about romance. Hard to tell when there is social pressure involved. For all I know she could be a wannabe wedding planner or something."

"Okay, fair, I was a little leaning on the old theory of marriage where you weren't married until you consummated the relationship."

"Yeah...  and I guess she her rival at least acknowledges the nuptials in that one rant of hers."