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Jul 11, 2020 6:50 PM
daria summons demon azhga
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Okay no talking then. If stands really still maybe he'll become invisible?

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"I... kindofsummonedamostlyungaghedeomon. And asked him things. And he didn't know some things so I, uh, summonedanotherone."

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She glances from Daria to the demons, who have entirely failed at becoming invisible. 

"I... see." She closes the door carefully behind her and sits down heavily on the bed, only partly because it's the only open space in a room not designed for four people, two of them winged.

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Demons are in fact trying to not have their wings take up too much space but they are large. 

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Thinking his wings off would be REALLY WEIRD he should not do that. Awkward wave?

Waving gets a slightly reproachful glance from Manakel, which is entirely fair but makes him much more confident in the decision to do so. 

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"...just to clarify, you summoned an ungaged demon, who told you there was an afterlife, so you summoned another one to check."

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"Yes? The deal was accurate information, I didn't just take their word for it!"

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Mariam takes a deep breath and points at Manakel, who seems less uncertain than the waving one. "Tell me what you told her. In small words, please, I'm confused enough as it is."

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“My deal with my summoner was to give true answers to some questions for the name of a book.

“Humans usually go to a place usually called Limbo when they die. Limbo is rather boring in that it is an infinite plane of dirt in which nothing can grow, but Limbo culture tries to mitigate that, and there are occasional concordances with Heaven, Hell, and Fairyland where daeva can send limboites nice things. Summoners become daeva when they die.

“The first is widely known among daeva, the latter is not; it’s hard to tell but I think most daeva are aware that some daeva used to be human, just not what caused them in particular not to go to Limbo.

“You can confirm this with demonic forensics.”

Pause. 

“Also, demons can’t actually take, uh, pneumas—Daria made a very specific gag—, some demons are making that up because they like to upset people.”

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"It's not my fault there's an actual afterlife!"

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"No. No, it isn't your fault there is an afterlife. That wasn't - are you trying to misinterpret - aaaagh."

At this point Mariam gives up on trying to be the adult in the room and collapses face first onto the bed.

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Manakel is an adult but Mariam probably legitimately needs to collapse for a bit.

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Azhga is not remotely an adult. Azhga is technically three. He plays with his fidget toy and manages with great effort to restrain himself from saying things.

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"Sorry?" Daria tries after a minute of silence.

   "If you're going to try things like this warn me next time," mutters Mariam into her pillow.

"Um. You would have told me not to and I didn't want to fight again."

    "If you're going to do it anyway I'd rather know! Do you really think I don't know you well enough that I can't tell when you're set on doing something?"

"Oh. Sorry." Daria says again, slightly more confidently.

    "It's - well, it's not okay," Mariam says, turning to face Daria and the two demons, "but we should probably... do something about that."

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He really wants things done about this! He wants human friends! He wants humans to have access to Hell's internet and library and stuff!

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"I imagine that the fine folks at Ganymede have some procedure for obvious infohazards which are not especially in our favor here."

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"No, they really aren't." Mariam had done a lot of reading in the process of making friends with Daria.

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"I mean, we can just check, it isn't hard if we use a standard forensics binding and think about the wording of the deal a bit." Daria also did a lot reading, as a natural consequence of being Daria, but very little of it had focused on safety procedures and she wasn't entirely certain she believed in infohazards.

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"I doubt that's enough. Anybody can say they checked."

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"We tell them to check. They don't have to let you talk to do forensic conjuration."

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"That only works if they actually check, and it would be really hard to get them to check because they'd be spending their time on the word of some crazy people who were probably messed up by talking demons. Maybe if we make enough of a scene beforehand—that could bias them against us too but at some point they'd have to check

"Making a scene about this sound kind of hard, but you could... publish a collection of art by demons or something? There's totally loads of people who would buy that and we can just conjure something along those lines because Hell has excellent content curation. With profiles of the artists. Cute ones. If we wanna soften the blow, the collection has zero words written by a demon, just art and human-made profiles, but I don't know if it makes sense to do that."

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Daria mutters something uncomplimentary about 'idiots that won't check simple facts'.

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"We should at least double check first - no offense intended," she adds to the demons, "but I'd like to have more to go off of if we're going to be doing public relations for you."

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The demons think that makes perfect sense and do not object. 

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