Humans generally don't make their places pretty enough.

Okay, so we'll want to make sure it's a place we can paint and stuff.

And add a waterfall, Moryo's got a nice waterfall in his, and make the walls out of something nicer than plaster, and have big gardens....

...I think you're not looking at an apartment anymore.

We can do a castle, too!

In a small California college town?

Why not?

I am really not sure I want that much attention.

Okay, discreet castle it is.

...How?

Uh, the options are 'magic' or 'fiddling with zoning laws', I don't know which is faster but I can call Moryo and ask him.

If you want a castle I'm fine with a discreet one as long as it manages to be genuinely discreet.

We're good at discreet. We've been here seven hundred years, haven't even taken over a small country as far as you've heard...

Have you taken over any countries?

Lacked the motivation. I'll do it now, if you want to be Queen of England or something.

If I wanted to be queen of something I think England would be a pretty poor choice, but noted, she giggles.

What d'you want to be queen of?

I can't say it's ever been a particular ambition of mine. I'll think about it.

If things had worked out just a little differently you'd have been scary close to Queen of the Noldor.

Might've been better than what did happen, depending.

I have not gotten any more qualified to run a country while you were dead, dear.

Yeah.

Well. Didn't happen.

Nope.

She checks to make sure no one's looking and conjures the Epic Hat of Garish Wax Fruit on his head.

He laughs and cries at the same time. It's really marvelous.