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"It's a lovely moon. Perfectly suited for late night strolls."

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"I hear the eclipses are something else, but haven't had any in the hemisphere since I've been on the planet. It's gorgeous just doing standard moon operating procedure, though."

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"It really is. I've never seen a solar eclipse, but the lunar ones are awesome too."

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"Most moons aren't the right size to do those things very neatly. It's one of Earth's more famous features. Top three."

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"What are the other two?"

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"Birthplace of humanity, cultural center of the galaxy. There's richer planets, I think Tau Ceti and Escobar compete on population, but Earth has the good novelists and musicians and so on."

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"Oh, I thought you meant like physical features. Birthplace of humanity, bit obvious."

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"Physical features it's the moon first, and second I guess the biodiversity - there are planets with native life but it tends to be inconvenient, fragile relative to terraforming, and not usually as well-developed as Earth's, and nobody puts all the kinds of beetles without missing any on a new place they're terraforming."

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"Oh, that makes sense. Now I'm imagining some poor terraformer crying over the difficulty presented by all these blasted beetles."

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"There are really too many! I don't know a whole lot about terraforming but I imagine they must skimp on the plants, too."

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"I don't think anyone's going to cry over leaving behind poison ivy."

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"I've never even heard of that, and based on the name I imagine you are right."

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"It produces chemicals that itch for weeks if you touch them. There's an urban legend about a guy who--never mind, it's not delicate."

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"Is there a sign? Please do not be indelicate in this bar?" asks Ivan, looking around.

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"No, but in my experience men don't like stories involving nasty chemicals and a man's sensitive bits."

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"This is true," Ivan admits, "but not for reasons of delicacy."

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"I feel like there's an innuendo there about the delicacy of the relevant area but the specifics are escaping me."

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Ivan thinks for a moment. "I can't come up with anything," he sighs.

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"Tragic. Such a perfect opening, and neither of us enough of a cunning linguist to take advantage."

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...sporfle. "That - only sort of works, I think the bar is translating, but it comes close enough. So to speak."

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"I hope there's no one who's going to take offense at you hearing such things from strange girls."

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"I am currently quite lacking in anyone who might fear attempts on my virtue, myself included."

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"And how about yours, do you have virtue-guarding dragons and a moat or anything?"

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"Nothing of the sort. I'm unattached at the moment, and anyone else who thinks it's their business shall find themselves entirely disregarded."

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