"Besides, better safe than sorry. I don't know that pork that's never been a pig isn't kosher, but I don't know that it is either. And it would be a little hard to check, too, given that it would involve trying to explain Milliways to a rabbi without proof."

"I imagine that could be awkward. I'm probably not going to tell anyone I was here."

"I had to tell some people, because I brought home technology to reverse-engineer, but one of the perks of so many of one's nearest and dearest being telepaths is that it makes it much easier for them to believe your more fantastical truths."

"That's - probably easier than trying to construct an explanation, yep."

"It really is. You haven't really understood how how inadequate language is until you've been discussing something with your telepathic best friend for hours and then you need to try to tell someone not a telepath how something smells."

...Ivan giggles.

"I don't know how your language does, but late twentieth century English does not have a comprehensive vocabulary for dealing with odor."

"Neither does any language I know enough of to comment on."

"I wonder why."

"Sort of hard to separate features of smells, isn't it? Except by comparison to specific things. If something's bready, I can just say that."

"I suppose. But then, maybe it's hard to separate them because we don't have the words for it. I'd say that something bready smelled more like something musky than like something sweet, wouldn't you?"

"No, actually, I'd group bread closer to sweet."

"Maybe it depends on the kind of bread. Or the kind of musk. Alas, due to the language barrier, we shall never know."

"Alas!"

"So how are you liking Earth, while you're there? We haven't irreparably poisoned the atmosphere, I hope."

"It's quite breathable, no one has to live in arcologies. It's got an amazing moon. Noplace else has quite so nice a moon."

"It's a lovely moon. Perfectly suited for late night strolls."

"I hear the eclipses are something else, but haven't had any in the hemisphere since I've been on the planet. It's gorgeous just doing standard moon operating procedure, though."

"It really is. I've never seen a solar eclipse, but the lunar ones are awesome too."

"Most moons aren't the right size to do those things very neatly. It's one of Earth's more famous features. Top three."

"What are the other two?"

"Birthplace of humanity, cultural center of the galaxy. There's richer planets, I think Tau Ceti and Escobar compete on population, but Earth has the good novelists and musicians and so on."

"Oh, I thought you meant like physical features. Birthplace of humanity, bit obvious."

"Physical features it's the moon first, and second I guess the biodiversity - there are planets with native life but it tends to be inconvenient, fragile relative to terraforming, and not usually as well-developed as Earth's, and nobody puts all the kinds of beetles without missing any on a new place they're terraforming."

"Oh, that makes sense. Now I'm imagining some poor terraformer crying over the difficulty presented by all these blasted beetles."