lifes_sake
Cam studies. He studies madly. The next week elapses with him having very little sense of individual days. He doesn't want anyone to know anything special is up, so he goes to a movie with Renée and to a friend's house after school to play Nintendo games and Charlie gets his weekly phone call and he shows up to his classes and gets his homework adequately done. But other than that he studies. He wants to be fluent in this thing inside three months if possible. It's easier than Spanish, he's motivated, he can use it in everyday conversations as he asks passing animals and convenient plants how smart they are (dogs: smarter than goats; squirrels: about goat level; his friend's hamster: dumb as a rock; shrubs: way dumber than trees; indoor potted rosemary: just a step above grass) and chats with Grace, he's basically dropping himself in an immersion course with some inconvenient English here and there so he can interact with humans. He thinks three months is ambitious but reasonable.
He's not actually doing that many spells. He does wheedle tofu into tastiness on a nightly basis, and when he feels a cold coming on he looks up a spell about that, but he wants to know what he's doing before he gets going on what he most wants to be doing, because he wants to be doing big things. He swore to oppose death. He meant that.
Today he is preparing to oppose death in his backyard. It's threatening rain and he doesn't want to be all the way down the street with Leafy if the clouds open up. The jerk tree doesn't talk to him if he doesn't talk to it and it's perfectly serviceable as something to sit under, anyway.
He's not actually doing that many spells. He does wheedle tofu into tastiness on a nightly basis, and when he feels a cold coming on he looks up a spell about that, but he wants to know what he's doing before he gets going on what he most wants to be doing, because he wants to be doing big things. He swore to oppose death. He meant that.
Today he is preparing to oppose death in his backyard. It's threatening rain and he doesn't want to be all the way down the street with Leafy if the clouds open up. The jerk tree doesn't talk to him if he doesn't talk to it and it's perfectly serviceable as something to sit under, anyway.
lifes_sake
"Apparently the senior wizard around here is a cat," Cam adds. "I'd need to look up statistics on how many cats are affected by various cat-affecting things to know how that sort of issue stacks up against chopping down trees and various human stuff and the offplanet equivalents, though."
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"With any luck I'll live a very, very long time, but you have a point. I'm also less likely to stumble into a bad misstep on a familiar world. And I can get started on productive work instead of learning curve sooner."
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"Yeah." He chews his lip a bit. "You two want to meet Renée and help me explain magic to her?"
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Cam packs up - his manual is still reciting things to Grace; it's on healing spells now - and leads them to his house.
"Mom!" he calls. "I brought some friends home!"
"Do they want cookies?" Renée calls back.
"Mom!" he calls. "I brought some friends home!"
"Do they want cookies?" Renée calls back.
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"If your friends want cookies they'll keep their language age-appropriate," sings Renée's voice.
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"That's better! You can all come in and introduce yourselves!"
Cam leads Matilda and Jellybean into the kitchen. "Matilda, Jellybean, this is my mom Renée." He takes a cookie off the cooling rack for himself.
"School friends?" Renée says, evaluating Jellybean's sex and outfit and tilting her head but not commenting.
"No, uh, a hobby thing," Cam says. "Actually I thought you might want to hear about it, is why I invited them over." Pause. "It is unrelated to how they're dressed."
"Oh, I was wondering just a little," Renée admits.
Cam leads Matilda and Jellybean into the kitchen. "Matilda, Jellybean, this is my mom Renée." He takes a cookie off the cooling rack for himself.
"School friends?" Renée says, evaluating Jellybean's sex and outfit and tilting her head but not commenting.
"No, uh, a hobby thing," Cam says. "Actually I thought you might want to hear about it, is why I invited them over." Pause. "It is unrelated to how they're dressed."
"Oh, I was wondering just a little," Renée admits.
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"Yeah, that's just them, they think it's fun," says Cam, "I am still all about jeans and t-shirts. The hobby is magic."
"You never seemed that interested in your stage magic kit that you got two Christmases ago," Renée says.
"Yeah," Cam says. "It was fake."
Renée peers at him.
"Guys, do you have a standard demo that usually works or should I make something up?" Cam asks Matilda and Jellybean.
"You never seemed that interested in your stage magic kit that you got two Christmases ago," Renée says.
"Yeah," Cam says. "It was fake."
Renée peers at him.
"Guys, do you have a standard demo that usually works or should I make something up?" Cam asks Matilda and Jellybean.
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"It sounds it, what's the spell?"
"Cam," says Renée weakly.
"Oh. So, yeah, I can do magic, so can they, we're wizards, I'm new at it and they've been at it for a while." Pause. "I'm learning it out of a magic book. Also the vegetarianism thing is because wizards can talk to things that can't talk and I was alarmed about how smart some of it was, but it turns out that chickens aren't much brighter than grass, which is to say really dim, so we can add poultry back in. That's why I wanted to go visit Lori and went out to see the goats, I wanted to see if I needed to worry about them. I do - I'm still not going to eat any mammals. Trees are an issue, too, they're pretty much as smart as humans."
Renée looks dubiously at the cookie in her hand.
"The cookie doesn't care, Mom, go ahead."
"Cam," says Renée weakly.
"Oh. So, yeah, I can do magic, so can they, we're wizards, I'm new at it and they've been at it for a while." Pause. "I'm learning it out of a magic book. Also the vegetarianism thing is because wizards can talk to things that can't talk and I was alarmed about how smart some of it was, but it turns out that chickens aren't much brighter than grass, which is to say really dim, so we can add poultry back in. That's why I wanted to go visit Lori and went out to see the goats, I wanted to see if I needed to worry about them. I do - I'm still not going to eat any mammals. Trees are an issue, too, they're pretty much as smart as humans."
Renée looks dubiously at the cookie in her hand.
"The cookie doesn't care, Mom, go ahead."
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"I have one of those," Cam says. "One of my wards is a mental thing and it already had company when I cast it. Not as practical."
"Thank you," Renée says to Matilda and Jellybean, recovering her equilibrium somewhat.
"Mom, if you want, you can learn the language to talk to stuff, but you can't be a wizard," Cam says.
"...That does sound interesting," admits Renée.
"Thank you," Renée says to Matilda and Jellybean, recovering her equilibrium somewhat.
"Mom, if you want, you can learn the language to talk to stuff, but you can't be a wizard," Cam says.
"...That does sound interesting," admits Renée.
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"What do cookies say?" Renée asks, looking dubiously at them.
"I don't really want to address the cookies. Talking to stuff makes it smarter, even if it doesn't make it smart enough to matter. But I talked to one of your muffins the other day. It just said it was a muffin. It didn't have anything else to say," Cam tells her. "I imagine cookies are about the same."
"I don't really want to address the cookies. Talking to stuff makes it smarter, even if it doesn't make it smart enough to matter. But I talked to one of your muffins the other day. It just said it was a muffin. It didn't have anything else to say," Cam tells her. "I imagine cookies are about the same."
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"And I can talk tofu into tasting like whatever," Cam says. "Since I'm guessing mammals in general are probably about as smart as the goats."
"Well," says Renée. "That... opens up interesting culinary possibilities."
Cam grins. "So, um, now that I can teach myself an extremely practical skill, all self-study, I might want some time out of school here and there to go work on wizard projects. Can I get you to write me notes for that and tell anybody who asks that I'm suddenly rather chronically ill?"
"...As long as they're legitimate projects and not all gallivanting off for fun," says Renée thoughtfully, crossing her arms. "Gallivanting can wait for ordinary school vacations. And you will have to make a reasonable effort at keeping up in classes." She peers at Matilda and Jellybean. "Do you two go to school?"
"Well," says Renée. "That... opens up interesting culinary possibilities."
Cam grins. "So, um, now that I can teach myself an extremely practical skill, all self-study, I might want some time out of school here and there to go work on wizard projects. Can I get you to write me notes for that and tell anybody who asks that I'm suddenly rather chronically ill?"
"...As long as they're legitimate projects and not all gallivanting off for fun," says Renée thoughtfully, crossing her arms. "Gallivanting can wait for ordinary school vacations. And you will have to make a reasonable effort at keeping up in classes." She peers at Matilda and Jellybean. "Do you two go to school?"
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"Matilda's mom is a teacher too," volunteers Cam.
"Really," says Renée with interest. "And does she know about - wizarding?"
"Really," says Renée with interest. "And does she know about - wizarding?"