"My humblest apologies, Your Ruffliness."

Bell laughs. "I wouldn't wear anything like this if I weren't trying to go undercover in the Capitol!" she protests around helpless giggles.

Tony finally cracks up.

"Seriously, I'm going to rule in jeans and a t-shirt and a crown made of coral and abalone and pearls," says Bell. "And everyone will take their fashion cues from me, too, because I will be in charge, and then maybe people will stop wearing this kind of eyesore nonsense." She hefts the box. "I'm gonna haul this upstairs and make sure everything fits. Back in a minute."

"Okay, Your Ruffliness," giggles Tony.

Sherlock glances after her, waits a beat, and then sits in Tony's lap and kisses him. Because he is a glorious impossible creature and she loves him transcendently.

"...Yeah?" Bell says, blinking. "Do you now."

"The awkward thing in question would be that we have been fucking since we were sixteen," says Sherlock.

"Ah-huh," says Bell. "I'm guessing that you didn't plan for me to find out at all and if I hadn't fallen on the stairs there would have been several feet of distance between you by the time I got down here. That's swell." She doesn't even muster a sarcastic tone for that last remark; it's as deadpan as the rest of it.

"We did not know how to tell you, or when," says Sherlock, extricating herself from Tony's lap. "Or how strongly you would disapprove."

"Well. It wasn't any of my business before the other day. But 'since you were sixteen' incorporates a period of time between us getting together and having that perfunctory monogamy conversation. And I'm under the impression that even when people are not being monogamous they're at least entitled to information on the subject of how they're being not-monogamous. So there is some disapproval. Yeah. The 'when' should've been 'before saying you wanted me to hack my brain so I could date you'. Sometime before then."

Bell plants her elbow on her knee and her forehead in her hand. "I don't know what to say," she says. "Did you think I'd care that you're siblings, is that it? I didn't kick up a bit of fuss about the alts thing; if you didn't expect calm sanity from me on the subject before that you should've after."

"Look," says Tony, "right now, you are the only person that knows. Because people in general would care that we're siblings, they would care a lot, and it would be a whole big disgustingly public problem. So we just—don't. Let anyone find out. Ever."

Bell leans back against the stairs. "And that would be fine if neither of you were trying to date anyone else. Except maybe your alts and each other's alts, I suppose they'd understand."

"I don't really date," says Tony. "I fuck a lot, but it's kinda not the same thing."

"I did not think of it," Sherlock says quietly.

Oh, that stings. If she'd been actually planning to cheat on Bell that would have been better; Bell would have felt like something about her presence in the situation even mattered. Bell looks away, biting her lip.

"I did not think of Tony, during our conversation. And then we just... didn't," she says, gesturing between herself and Tony. "Until the other Sherlock."

"Yes," says Sherlock.