It lurks. Oh how it lurks.
"I'm sorry," says Elspeth, but she runs the check again and this time Bella comes up just under the threshold of acceptability. "Um, Bella, in fairness, we can't seriously hurt you either. The vampires are faster but only one of them can teleport, he can't track you, and you can heal any wounds anybody could give you before you could jump away."
"Okay. Here goes," Elspeth says. She heads for the door, and when she opens it, it does not lead to Libby's living room. Instead, it leads to a room with a copier and a vampire in it. "Hi, Santiago," she says. "I went to Milliways and I found my alternate universe mama and grandma."
"If you don't mind," says Elspeth.
"Not at all." Santiago runs away - that's either customary here or this is the sort of task that requires haste.
"Not really, but she'll come up with some less bizarre sounding way to put it, and then people won't waste time being surprised when we get there," shrugs Elspeth. "So, welcome to 2030 Golden-Empire-World Norway. This capital is called, um, Lisel, because my parents considered that name for me and this is mostly a capital site since I was born here."
"It could have been named Libby but they didn't like that name as much," says Elspeth apologetically, "and it didn't sound as much like a city."
"That's okay. Libby isn't even my favourite nickname, actually, but maybe that's a story for another time."
The throne room - cannot really be called that. It contains no throne; indeed no chairs at all. Vampires - chalky-pale golden-eyed and ridiculously lovely - stand about. Including a recognizable Bella who looks the same age as the human one, with her hair cut fetchingly at shoulder length, wearing jeans, a T-shirt, and a crown. At her shoulder is a man of comparable apparent age, gorgeous and bronze-haired like Elspeth, and perpetually whispering into his Bella's ear.
"This is interesting," says the resident Bella. "Very interesting indeed."
"I think so too," human-Bella says frankly. "Okay: I can guess why the empire, why the vampirism, why the hot husband, why the incongruous outfit. I want to know why the hair."
Golden Bella laughs. "I got set on fire. Twice. Vampire hair grows very slowly, so once I got to a point where I could find a style I liked, I just stuck with it. And you may want to keep your remarks about my husband to a minimum. You make him somewhat uncomfortable. And not solely by virtue of the fact that you're an alternate version of me. By any chance, do you have the magical wherewithal to control your scent?"
"That can be arranged," says Bella. Triangles can do scents. She arranges for a triangle to do scents. "Just me, or Libby too?"
"Well," says the vampire Bella, "Libby might feel more comfortable if no one in the room were contemplating trying to eat her, but she is not a special problem in this respect, whereas you - and I, before I turned - are a very special problem for Edward in particular."
"I don't have a strong opinion on people contemplating trying to eat me unless they find it very inconvenient to think about," she says instead.
(And wonders, if they do find it very inconvenient to think about, if the judicious application of a seven-pointed star might do the species as a whole some good. Something to suggest... probably to her Bella, maybe to Lazarus. She should bring Lazarus here, or get Bella to. She bets he'd love it.)
"Somewhat so," local Bella shrugs, "though not something we don't all deal with on a regular basis."
"I may want to steal your crown design," nonlocal Bella says speculatively.
"It would be derivative if you copied it altogether," says the paler Bella.
"I won't make mine out of gold," suggests Bella. "I'm going to conjure it out of nothing, I can just make the whole thing out of marbled-moissanite-and-opal if I want. In fact, I like that idea."
"That sounds both lovely and like something I wouldn't do given the chance since it would be off-theme. Go for it," says her vampire counterpart.