"Yeah, that's valid. 'Lots of fun' doesn't mean, uh, 'universally loved.' Or 'tolerable to more than about a dozen people in the world,' maybe."

"It does not indeed."

"What do you like better about Leo? Unless it's just his sheer not-Xan-ness, which I can respect."

"Leo seems less like he's one really bad mood away from a pick-and-mix of felonies."

"So, not being Xan. Again, respectable. Though felonies aren't on the table, since he knows I'd beat the tar out of him. And Leo keeps him in check a bit, too, which helps. Or at least reminds him that people object to his being cartoonishly evil."

"The trouble with cartoonish evil in real life is that it's much more difficult to perpetrate it against cartoons."

"True. Which is why I'm poised to beat the tar out of him if he steps out of line. The system, she works."

"If you call peer violence a system."

"I mean, really I'm just a middleman for the system proper. If the actual cops cracked down on him, it'd be bad. And he defies authority basically on principle. But while I can beat him up, I still don't really count as authority because we've got whatever kind of weird fucked-up relationship we've got. So instead of following laws because they're good and just, or following them because the Man would be after him if he didn't, he follows them because I'd be after him if he didn't."

"Whatever works, I guess."

"Yeah. Plus I've got some hope that I can get him to something resembling morality by graduation, and that wouldn't happen if they threw him in superjail or whatever. And I'd hate to break up his... cute, creepy, whatever it is, thing with Leo."

"It would be cute in a cartoon - do gay couples exist in cartoons in 2015? - and I lack the vocabulary for it in real life."

"There's a couple of 'em! Which is nice. And lacking vocabulary for Xan and Leo is pretty standard. But I'm pretty sure Leo's better off with him, and Xan's obviously happy with the whole thing."

"Good for them. And for gay cartoons. Hey Alli, there are gay cartoon characters in 2015. No, not that many. No, why would I make you watch them? Well, of course it wasn't in your pamphlet on supportive sisterhood, your pamphlet was issued in 2002. Love you too."

"The pamphlet is fictional," Bella clarifies. "There are not - well, at least Alli has not received - any pamphlets on how to have a lesbian twin."

"...Gay. Interesting. That is- interesting. I am somewhat gay myself. Interestingly enough."

"...Is this more alternate universe year 2015 slang, because earlier today you claimed to be gay for a male teacher, and also I was not aware that gay came in 'somewhat' but perhaps I am not an expert being merely completely gay?"

"Bi. I'm bisexual. Sorry, it's- I say things weirdly. It's a thing. I'm bi. And you're pretty."

"...I apologize for being distracted by your phrasing while you were trying to hit on me. You are also pretty."

"Eh, it's cool. My hitting on people is adaptive. And... thank you. Do you want to kiss or something? We are in a very nice secluded clearing."

"I might require dates before kissing. I haven't given it much thought because I have not historically dated. Or kissed."

"Oh, sure, dates are fine! I love dates. Plus you can teleport and stuff, so we're not limited to the bounties of Dunwich. Do you want to go on a date sometime?"

"Yes."