Because I don't want to take a five-hour shower.

Oh, direct street to ear contact, I was imagining you just walking along and rubbing your ear with your hand.

Yeah I meant street to ear contact.

I am glad you have been dissuaded from this bizarre practice.

I do not actually do that if it was unclear.

Figured.

Also if I did anything that weird in public you would probably have gotten emails asking me if their alien was defective and could they trade her in for a new one.

I can neither confirm nor deny that I have been asked about the quality and tradeability of our aliens.

Naturally!

I think you are aliens of the highest quality.

We are excellent aliens who do not rub our faces on random streets at all!

It would be a forgivable foible.

We also do not mistreat people for having hair the wrong shade of pretty or allow babies to die, I will acknowledge.

I'm glad you like my hair! I do too.

Your hair is lovely.

When I was little and it was white I used to dye it all different shades. Picture of two year old Peka with hot pink hair tipped in burgundy.

Oh my gosh!!!

Slightly older two year old Peka with nearly-orange bangs fading to nearly-purple in the back through a sunset range. Slightly younger two year old Peka with ruby jewel toned hair. Three year old Peka with pinkish-white roots showing and crimson dye on one half and magenta on the other. Two year old Peka in maroon with rose highlights. One year old Peka in brilliant scarlet streaked with rust.

You have phenomenal taste in hair dye.

The sunset dealie took stupid amounts of maintenance.

It wouldn't with magic!

I'm used to my natural color now but I would've been pretty thrilled about that when I was two.

Two and how much, it's--frowned upon in our culture to encourage anyone younger than two and a half to do non-tiny magic.

It was autumn. I wanted to do autumn leaves but that goes through orange more than red so I did sunset.

That would've been fine, then.