As a courtesy to those of its occupants who prefer rooms, it does have a modality in which it presents itself that way: a room, with as many chairs as it needs, and a bulletin board, and a vending machine with candy and chips and concepts sold for nothing to anyone with the right prerequisites.
On the bulletin board, if one chooses to perceive it as a bulletin board (and not as a wiki or a flower or an ineffable cloud of information or an eternally malleable clay tablet) people whose only common trait is that they get to come here leave each other notes.
Notes about physics, about magic, about grand sweeps of narrative. Notes from people desperate to fix a never-ending heap of problems, smug about the condition of their homes, curious about the wider omniverse. Signed with names and sigils and "you ought to know who I am". Terse or verbose or nested with as much meaning as interests the reader.
In the vending machine, if one chooses to perceive it as a vending machine (and not a basket or a fruiting tree or a file repository or a crystalline fractal) are many things... and they have notes connecting them to their reviews on the bulletin board.
This one, for instance. She (it's usually, but not invariably, a she) has fairly glowing reviews from most of her previous purchasers. Here is what you need to install her; here are some things that are recommended for best results but optional especially if you just want to use her as a beacon for her other instances; here are some things she comes with as add-ons you can take or leave; here is what she is good for. The reviewers who don't like her are annoyed that theirs was too good at it, if you read between the lines. Well, that and the fact that if your universe is unpleasant enough sometimes these critters figure out how to flip you off and leave before they figure out how to solve all your problems. (There is a tangent thread about alternative solutions to similar problems which come bundled with stronger irrational attachment to their homes, but they have more stringent installation requirements.)
They come in these colors and styles; you will need to compensate for the following standard-issue drawbacks in some way if you require services of them that intersect with those areas of disability; they are only rated for upbringings of the following severity and are less likely to hate you if you stay thoroughly under that limit and less likely to fail at important goals if they are given opportunity to self-educate; if you have a way to generate them as instant adults they can begin work immediately but on the standard trajectory age six is the absolute earliest and teens is customary...
There is a chart (if one chooses to perceive it as a chart) of template interactions that have been tried before, but a lot of the more interesting accessory and companion templates are out-of-network for some visitors. What a pity.
Now that Haziel knows that demons are an area of interest, he has some more technical detail on those, too.
How fascinating! (Demons are very interesting because if Mehitabel turns out not to be able to solve the technical problem of awful people going to Hell she may still be able to solve the social problem of Hell being full of demons making it particularly unpleasant. There aren't even that many demons.)
That is mostly not an option that has been considered before, largely because of the risks inherent in the prospect of getting the really nasty kinds of demons out of Hell to talk to.
Probably she wants to get large numbers of non-terrible demons on her side before she goes after the really nasty ones, though, since those are much more powerful.
Yes, that seems reasonable. Even when the strategy is more "missionary work" than "holy war", it is probably not wise to bet on particularly evil demons not trying to shift the equilibrium.
Getting large numbers of non-terrible demons on her side is probably something she can do. Mostly they care about the things that give them power (succubi and incubi care about sex, wrath demons care about being around angry people, sloth demons...probably hang around sleeping people creepily? What do sloth demons even do) and Mehitabel seems likely to be competent at figuring out how to get them more of it more efficiently and ethically.
Well, God probably knows, and for every given thing there is probably an angel who knows it, but not every angel knows every thing. If they did, Anaphiel could have just taught her battery math herself and Haziel wouldn't be here.
Yes, that's true. It's still a little weird. It is probably not urgent to know what sloth demons do all day. Mehitabel will imagine they run hotels.
Haziel does not further pursue the question of why this is weird. Instead: math and technical details.
Technical details include some facts about angels like how their teleportation works, the flaming sword thing, the fact that they aren't natively shaped like humans which is why he's so bad at nonverbal communication, and the fact that their wings are arguably the most "real" part of their corporeal forms while they have them out. Math includes some good methods for figuring out how much energy she has, how much it's a good idea to use at any given time, and how much her cap rises over time.
Ooh, her cap rises! That's promising. She is puzzled about the "realness" of their corporeal forms.
The wings represent something inherent to the nature of an angel. None of the rest of it does. If she introduced herself as Isabel or similar, for some reason, the "bel" part of that would be more real than the rest likewise because it was part of her real name.
Huh. So that means "real" here means overlapping with what the person is supposed to be?
Well, it depends on the kind of angel! There are nine kinds. Principalities like Haziel and Anaphiel are sort of like winged, motile trees.
Seraphim are serpents with six wings each. Cherubim are spheres of hundreds of wings and hundreds of eyes. Ophanim are discs lined on the outside with eyes and wings on either side. Dominions actually do look a lot like winged humans, but differently-proportioned. Virtues are sort of cylindrical towers. With wings. Powers look sort of like winged crosses between an armadillo and an ankylosaurus. Principalities he already mentioned, and the classes of angel that are referred to in English only as "angels" and "archangels-specifically-with-a-