Oh. "Well, I'm not attached, but I'm told she's passing fair etcetera. It'd be very nice of you."

"Yeah, sure. I was just passing through anyway and didn't want her to languish."

"Aw. You're nice! What's your name? I'm Arel, you can call me Ar if you like."

"Jann. Of Raxwell. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too. I'm guessing you're an actual knight, then?"

"Yep. School, sword on the shoulders, the whole deal. Are you not? This may present a problem if you're not a knight or a prince and you rescue a princess and then have to hash something out with her parents."

"Well, I'm not officially a knight, but it doesn't seem to make much difference to the dragons, they all think I am. And parents don't necessarily have to get involved, it's just a little bit of rescuing etcetera. Or just rescuing, if she'd rather."

"If you bypass the parents you're probably in good shape."

"So, what makes you willing to give up your shot at a maiden passing fair etcetera? Do you already have someone back home, maiden or otherwise?"

"Not right now, but I usually don't have too much trouble even sans heroic rescues. Actually, the only person I've ever rescued was my cousin. My male cousin who was taken by a very nearsighted dragon."

"That's amazing. Personally I like rescuing because it lets me be heroic and woo ladies at the same time. Though really, it'd be nice if there were more nearsighted dragons around. I'd love to rescue a prince some time for variety's sake."

"My cousin's attached to a duke, and I don't know of anybody else with his nearsighted carrying-off problem, but best of luck."

"Ah well. I'll have to make do with non-rescue wooing. You wouldn't happen to be woo-receptive, would you?"

"It seems like that would be slightly awkward what with us waiting for a dragon and a princess," Jann points out.

"I just like to check, is all. And in case the princess is non-receptive, it'd be nice to have someone around to aim at. And you're nice, and very pretty, and I don't know that I've ever been with a knight."

"If you just have a checklist with an empty box next to 'knight' in your back pocket I can point you to one of my friends who's generally keener on boys than I am, but, eh, if we both strike out with the princess you could talk me into killing some time."

"Well, I wouldn't object to a referral, but you're nice and you're here and you seem to have just issued me a challenge. Unless you haven't."

"It's not a challenge, really. I lean very much to girls. When there are no girls to be had I get less picky, that's all. You're very cute but do not appear to be a girl."

"Ah. Well, we'll see about this princess. And I may take that referral. Have I mentioned you're very nice?"

"You have! It's very gratifying."

"Hi, Leo. You a witch?" asks Jann.

"What incorrect thing does he keep saying?"

"I have never been accused of having this problem before. Maybe it runs in the family."

"I'm pretty sure it doesn't even mean anything, he just likes cattish insults. I don't think you smell womanly, for what it's worth. Not that there's anything wrong with that, women smell lovely."

"I'm not offended."

"Feel free to neglect translations. My cousin's cat is politer. I think. He isn't a witch, so he's guessing, albeit usually in a way that gets her to nod."

"Well, like I said, I can't really be sure about Cath."

Leo finds this satisfactory. Headbutting continues.

Jann pets him.

"Is that a witch thing?"

"Nope! Picked it up from a dwarf I met. As I said, I'm not particularly a witch."

"Ah. I don't know much about magic except that I should not touch strange carpets if I don't know what they do."

"Got taken for an unexpected ride?"

"No, my cousin unexpectedly turned me into a rabbit."

"An unpleasant witch. Already taken care of by clever children, I believe, but the carpet wound up in my uncle's treasury. Fortunately I turned back when I went out under a new moon."

"That's considerate of it, I suppose."

"It is. My cousin and my best friend both tried it recreationally later. They were very fluffy."

"It seemed to generate pretty cute bunnies. Glynn was about eighty percent floof, practically spherical. He couldn't see until I braided his fur."

"It was adorable. And much less alarming than when it happened to me, since we were expecting it."

"That's good. I might have to find this carpet of bunny and try it, at some point. Likely with Leo out of the room." Meow. "Of course I doubt your self-control. I've known you for years."

"Ducal castle of Raxwell, not to be confused with Ferdinandia," says Jann.

"I don't think I was likely to confuse the two. They don't sound very similar."

"They're right next to each other and used to be the same kingdom," explains Jann.

"Ah. I'm sure it would've been very embarrassing to go to one expecting the other, then. Thank you for the tip. Are the two on good terms?"

"Yeah. The duke of one's dating the prince of the other, and with any luck they can go back to being one kingdom soon."

"I did actually set them up, so I can't demur credit for that one."

"You're delightful."

"Thanks!"

Ari returns to work on his braided bunny! Leo exits Jann's lap to nap on Ari's head.

"Oh, I'll do it. How much defeating is called for? I'd hate to vanquish him excessively if he's only doing it for form's sake."

"Dragons these days are never properly attached to their maidens. Very disappointing for someone who wants a good fight."

"Well, if you feel like provoking him I can hardly stop you," says the princess.

"Eh. It feels unsporting. I'll let him half-ass it if he likes."

"I am, in fact, mostly a knight! I'm here to rescue your princess so that she can be returned to said girlfriend. And defeat you in the process."

"Yes, yes, very well," says Xorech, and he attacks.

Ari dodges his first attack, to all appearances by sheer luck, and spins into an enormously powerful kick to the dragon's side. He almost presses the attack, but then remembers that he's not supposed to be fighting, and hops back into a resting stance.

"Ow!" objects Xorech, and he swipes a claw at Ari, disgruntled.

Ari jumps out of the way, and the claw finds itself trapped in the suddenly liquid stone of the cave, which is suddenly not liquid again! (Dwarf magic, Ari loves dwarf magic.) He takes the opportunity to snap a kick down on the dragon's arm while it's not available to savage him.

"That is cheating," says Xorech, and he mutters a dragon spell to free his claw. (Meanwhile, his tail is free to swat his assailant.)

The dragon gets his claw out of the rock. "Cheating!" he snarls, and then there is fire.

Fire! Unpleasant! But not particularly deadly, just sort of blistery and unhappy for his sleeves. (Well-enchanted armor is a must for any magic-knight.) Ari thwacks Xorech reprovingly upside the jaw.

This cuts off the stream of fire, but the dragon has his claws all available again now. Pounce.

This is shaping up to be a delightful fight. Ari rolls backwards and hefts a boulder over his head, hurling it at the dragon. And another, for good measure.

The dragon ducks one and bats away the other and goes in for a bite.

Ari leaps into the air, over the bite, and lands on Xorech's head! There, he begins industriously punching at the dragon's skull. (He's not likely to do much real damage, but it's certainly unpleasant.)

"Hey! This is unorthodox ow knight behavior!" says Xorech, tossing his head.

"I am an unorthodox knight!" cackles Ari, as he rides Xorech's head like the proverbial mechanical bull. "Give in, fiend!"

Xorech slams the top of his head into the side of the mountain.

"Excellent. Lead the way, then! I... may need to find my horse."

"Do you not bring a spare horse when you go rescuing?" says Jann. "Also, where's your cat gotten to?"

Ari follows cheerfully. "I don't tend to keep track of place names so much. Sorry if I cause offense or something."

"How did you hear where I was being held captive to begin with if you didn't even know where I'm a princess of?" asks Lisatoline.

"Someone or other said, and I quote, 'a maiden passing fair has been captured by a dragon,' end quote. I asked around about local dragons and found out about that guy. I wonder if he'd spar with me sometime? I don't have enough dragon sparring companions."

"One. She's, uh... agreeable? Likes smashing me into things and doesn't mind getting smashed in turn, which goes well with sparring. Haven't seen her in a while, though, I'm rusty."

"Huh," says Jann. "Sounds handy, anyway."

"She's fun! I need to visit her lair. She kidnapped a prince for me once, it was hilarious. He was very confused about the whole affair."

"How obliging of her. Did things work out with the prince?"

"It did! He was very sweet once I'd rescued him and explained the situation."

"You've given me an excellent opportunity to try to seduce Jann," notes Arel. "Really, I should be thanking you."

"I hadn't realized it was quite as binary as all that. I hope you won't object to a bit of seduction."

Arel preens. Leo meows in disgust.

Which cracks Jann up.

Leo hops from Arel's horse to Jann's and perches on the princess, who he hopes may be less disgustingly cute.

"Hello there," says Lisatoline. Scritch scritch.

Leo is appreciative of scritching, and of this princess. He purrs at an astonishing volume, considering his size.

Lisatoline goes on petting him while the line of horses continues towards her home.

"I've never been! Are the caves fun? Also, yes."

"I've never been either, I just need something in them," says Jann, consulting his map and turning his horse with a last wave to Lisatoline.

"Water of Life. Turns people from stone back into... not... stone."

Arel winces. "Eesh. Sounds unpleasant. I might get some of that in case of emergencies. I'm guessing you have a specific case, though?"

"My dad's been stone since before I was born."

"Oh jeez. Sorry about that, then."

"I never met him, I don't much feel the lack, but yeah, it's about time I brought home some Water of Life, what with being a knight now."

"Good a time as any. My helping won't mess with some kind of prophesy or something?"

"No, there's no prophecy about his recovery. There was one about the turning into stone in the first place, but that's over with now."

"Well, good. D'you mind my tagging along for some of the water myself?"

"I don't mind, but one thing you do need to know is that you do not touch the pretty dipper. This is the sort of thing they cover in knight school, you have to use the plain tin dipper or you'll turn to stone."

"Hm. Makes sense! Do we provide unlucky dipper-users with water from the proper dipper? Seems only polite."

"Yeah, that's the plan."

"Well, lead on. I'm all excited for these caves now."

"I don't know how long it'll take to find the Water of Life once we've found the caves," says Jann. "Could be a while."

"Well, there are ways to pass the time. Conversation. Artistic pursuits. Less artistic pursuits."

"This is true."

"Look, it's not as though I'm not amenable, but you may find yourself disappointed by my level of enthusiasm if you're planning less artistic pursuits as a primary form of entertainment for a medium-sized amount of time, I don't want you noticing this at some more awkward moment and being all upset."

"Don't worry, I'm easily entertained by any number of things. The caves themselves are likely to be interesting, I've never met a cave I didn't like. I won't be upset about it."

Ari follows cheerfully! He pets Leo, who is asleep.