Mar 20, 2019 9:13 AM
you just haven't though of it yet
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"Your species. Is called time lord."

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"Yes. We're known for our humility and practicality. My name's the Master by the way."

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"A fine example of the species, it appears. I'm Sadde."

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"And what're you?"

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"I'm a vampire. How do you speak English?"

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"I don't. You're being translated."

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"And so I presume are you. By what? How?"

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The Master spreads his arms wide. 

"The TARDIS. Don't ask me how she does it. I barely understand and you definitely won't."

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"I have an eidetic memory and think several dozen times faster than a human, and I already had a very high IQ when I was human. Try me."

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"Fine, don't blame me if the words don't translate."

And the Master begins a very long, very technical explanation. He doesn't focus on how the TARDIS knows all the languages, that seems to be a given, but instead focuses on how the translation get into each of their heads without any delay or overlap with the actual spoken sounds. He also assumes knowledge of time-relative computing and who the TARDIS is. She seems to be some sort of AI, possibly tied to the ship, but he never explains. 

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Well then he'll interrupt the Master to ask about this stuff! Especially -

"Wait, does this thing travel through time?"

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"Yes, obviously."

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"I'm sorry, I believe this translation device must be defective, you seem to have said that it should be obvious that the spaceship disguised as a tree breaks all known laws of physics."

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The Master groans.

"Oh god you're one of those. Time travel is possible. Since it's possible, it doesn't break the laws of physics. You just haven't figured it out yet."

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"Yes I'm aware of the logic, I'm questioning the fact that you thought I should find this obvious at all given that my civilisation hasn't figured that out yet."

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"It's bigger on the inside," the Master says, as if that should explain everything.

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"I know enough General Relativity to know that this does not imply time travel."

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The Master sighs.

"It breaks your laws of physics. I don't have time to give you an elementary school education. Come with me."

The Master opens a door in the side of the room and goes through.

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He does. "It could also be magic, there's a lot of that going around, apparently."

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"It's not magic."

The Master opens a door and steps into a comically massive library. It's tall enough to fit a three story building and the shelves go all the way up to the ceiling. It's hard to tell with all the shelves in the way, but it's hard to see the far wall. 

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Now this library contains a vampire zapping extremely quickly everywhere and looking at all the books. He's even faster than he was when he was dodging the metal object.

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The Master plucks a book off a shelf in a recessed room off the side of the main library and waves it at him.

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Now said vampire is holding the book and reading it extremely fast.

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It appears to be an elementary school textbook on physics. The explanations are simple, but use examples based on the culture and geography of somewhere called Gallifrey. 

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