"Right, I've seen you've done your research on all of the people involved in this takeover, and could get it through in under a week. Very profitable."

"Just one more thing, you asked Jim Bagshaw if his Aunt Lilian was going to be at the Christmas party before you decided to go.

But, funny thing I checked and neither of his parents have a sister named Lilian. I didn't find stepsiblings or great aunts or anything else like that neither.

So who is she? And why did you seem so interested in not seeing her?"

"Just some annoying family friend, a Lilian Vasco. You wouldn't know her."

*ō-soto-gari*

I know my judo well.

"Aunty Lil is the one who got me the scholarship and I'm hurt you would fuck her like this."

"It's umm just a mistake."

Jean-Baptiste Carrier

"Yeah I meant you're hurt you would fuck her like this."

*pained flopping sounds*

"So the takeover is off. And we're going to discuss what you are going to need to do to make it off as in; you called it off and then proved that your miserable life has value to us. Or off as in; I'm going to let the spell finish you off next time."

"I'm not telling anything to a mummer."

Bro the 1800s called they want their slurs back. Yeah nah, close but let's go with:

"Is it the hair, cause I think it looks good on me?"

"I know what the taint of the grave means."

"What's it mean?"

"It means you're a zombie. A fucking necromantic monster."

Yeah we need to figure out who is leaking musty tomes to these jabronis.

"Oooh, so close but so wrong.

It means I don't need you alive to interrogate you."

"Then kill me already. You won't because you're -"

*crack* 

"You weren't using that jaw for anything productive anyways."

"Speaking of anyways, you're alive because-"

I want to practice interrogation on people who don't matter, so I can do it on people Great-uncle Owl would mind me killing.

"There is an off chance you'll be useful, and I'm not hungry so I would need to put you in dead wise-ass storage which reeks."

"Bruving you'n a vylent psygopath ihn' gunna nake me wanna helb you, psygotig cunh."

Redacted

"No you're psychotic."

I'm not not crazy, but I'm not a psychopath and to the extent it has anything to do with psychosis it's because Mr. S. Tan did a number on me in more ways than one.

I already tailed this dickhead long enough to roll up his contacts even if he's too fucked up to remember shit by the time he manages to kill himself. 

In terms of his interrogation, he gave up a bit more than he realized with how dated his shit was, but nothing too useful. This was a deliberate experiment though, I think I'm getting better at this when I stick to things I actually expect to work.

It really will be a bit of a pain to get rid of the corpse. 

Real talk, Helot doesn't even taste that good now that I'm not being deliberately starved. 

These sort of illusions are not my forte, so I have to use a pride flag to anchor the concept that I am supposed to look female despite having male bits. But I can afford a grand a month on components easy with the way work has been going, and I feel good for the first time in.

Um, ever really.

Ok maybe not ever, but the way my magic works has always made medical transition an uphill battle.

"Hey mate nice face paint are you on your way to the 41%?"

"Revs actually, is 41% cool should I check it out?"

"Yeah, it's right where a tranny like you belongs."

Hey guys, somebody said they like my facepaint and there is a new queer club called 41%, if it looks cool do you want to try it when you are over here?

Echo his exact words.

New target, that guy. Don't lose him, google it when you're somewhere safe.

It took awhile to set this up, dropping obvious in retrospect clues, planting clothing and makeup caches, and subtly messing with devices to plant search history while making sure 'Brunhilde' isn't going to have any links to me. Then dropping everything except for basic monitoring for change of address for a randomized several week span.

But it is time for someone to join the 41%.

"they act as a prism and form a rainbow."

Wait do I hear what I think I hear?

Cause if so she might get to live, but I'm still going to have some fun.

"The rainbow is a division of white light into many beautiful col-

Hey fuck off you stupid cat I told you to bang around someone else's bins."

And it's Ellen from behind with the noose.

*deep masc voice*

"Hey mate nice face paint are you on your way to the 41%?"

"It's not what it looks like! It's not mine someone just started leaving them and I got curious."

*extra gravelly*

"Really, well just one question, and if you lie to me I'll know. What name do you want on your tombstone?"

*crying*
"Br

Bru

"Well are you working on getting a name change? Do you need help starting E?  What do you think Lord Tedd's deal is? Which of my presents did you like best? Btws you get to live but stop being a dickhead to women just because you're jealous they transitioned already you really hurt my feelings."
*little noose pull on that last one then drops it*

*tearing at the noose*

"Uummmm, uh."

"Come on surely you have some thoughts."

Was hoping to get that setup someday.

"Look some kind of demonic duck."

Wait fuck she's between me and the apartment door. I can't run.

"Where'd she go?"

That was fun. I'll have to make sure to keep in touch.

"Does Melbourne need another electronica venue?"

"Do I need more shoes? Besides this way we can pre-game at The Riser, and still be able to walk home."

"Thanks for letting me crash so long, but I am going to get my own place once we have the club going.

We can still fuck though. Especially if you bring your cute American friend over for another threesome."

"Had me worried for a second. I'll see, Zoey really really doesn't drink but she is a good dancer including in bed."

I don't think that was cromulent but whatevs.

The bass and the tweeters make the speakers go to war! Aa the mighty trumpet brings the freaks out to the floor!

Hey Zoey have you learned Aramaic yet?

Not really.

*in Aramaic*

I like to suck and fuck the temple priests. And by suck I mean their blood.

I get it. It's a vampire pun.

Um something about blood sacrifice?

Detective I sent you through an Alchemical roster do you have it handy?

Yeah

Employee number 41 the chick with the blue glasses, she is going on holiday to Mexico City. She'll be in town starting 10 days from now and plans to spend the week. Make sure it's the rest of her life. This one is discreet, not flash. She's been asking questions we don't want people asking.

Can I count on you and Pewter to be in place, will she be traveling alone, do you have her exact itinerary?

Of course, duckie. Will make sure our travel agency has her itinerary included in the pile of bumf they are sending for your office's filing.

Next Ix, 12.19.4.2.14 Marge Vessey will have a heart attack or maybe stroke.

Boring ass outfit check. Wallet with decent but not huge amounts of money in multiple currencies, Check. Boring nerd glasses over brown eye contact lenses check. Real hair completely hidden by hat and wig check. Bob, and Chase have confirmed positions?

Chase are you and Bob clear for me to visit?

Yes, same as the last two times you asked. We're not going to strand you.

Thanks, I know you're both busy though.

Bob and Chase check. Package for Chase, check. Social calendar cleared enough it won't be weird for me to miss a day, check. Removal of all personal items and anything with my name on it from my outfit, except my knife check. My knife, check. Let's go ice a bitch.

First hop West, Thebes of the Many. Ours is the third. Say hi to Mr. Tadros at the gate and move on. Easily one of my least annoying acquaintances.

"Well hello there."

"Busy killing someone, this is what you wanted for me, right? So fuck off."

"I had something fo you but very well carry on."

"Good luck with the hit."

"Thanks, see ya around Mr.T."
Westward ho!

"G'day Chase I have a package for you."

"What a large package. I've got one for Bob."

"Aww, how sweet. In a bit of a rush though, want to make sure I have plenty of time."
New York time.

"Hi. Violet bat Qayin."

"Aww thanks. I have to look blokey for this, but am really letting my hair down at home. How are things going here, aside from Marge working herself into the ground?"

"Ok."

"Better than ok really, we're raking."

"You were going to show me some pictures? And take Chase's package."

Yeah, so this is the team.
*points right at Vessey*

"If you don't hear from me in 5 hours send her flowers. Would love to chat more, but I've got a job to do."

Tenochtitlan, where tourists go to die.

Your forecast for today is: ass, hot and smogy.

Perfecto. Still a little unpleasant.
Lawrence Edward Grace Oates

Nice cool air. Will leave me a little low on plasm to keep it up a full day, but not too bad.

Now to beat her to the Avenue of the Dead.

"Īquin huītz in tepozcalli in Miccaohtli? Nopiltzintzine, quēxquich nictlaxtlāhuaz?"

"¿Qué pedo?"

*speaking loudly and slowly*

"Īquin huītz in tepozcalli in Miccaohtli? Nopiltzintzine, quēxquich nictlaxtlāhuaz?"

"No hablo náhuatl."

"No hablo español."

"What?"

" Je parle le nahuatl, le latin, le grec ancien, le maya yucatèque, le vieux norrois, le français, l'araméen — et quelques autres."

"English motherfucker, do you speak it?"

"Oh. Yeah. Right. How much are tickets to the avenue of the dead and whats the bus schedule?"

"Pirámides. Not avenue. Twenty pesos, one way buy the return there."

 *taps the counter* 

"Every twenty minutes. All day."

"20 pesos? Sure thing, mate."

Ok, got here well in advance of when she is expected. Need to make sure I'll have good line of sight when she climbs the pyramid like everyone else and dies. Might have some time to poke around a bit. Too bad I can't afford to get a picture. It would be funny as fuck to get one at my day's sacrifice. Maybe some other time.

"un peso, un peso"

"death whistle get your death whistle's here"

"un peso, un peso"
"knives, obsidian knives for sale"

"un peso, un peso"

"blankets, genuine lama blankets"

"un peso, un peso"

"necklaces, obsedian necklaces here, look at that sheen."

"Bok bok bok, kinda cute but no."

Based on her eta, and the choke points I can have a brief dip into Palacio de Quetzalpapálotl.

I don't think that is really a Quetzal. It looks a little owl like. And kinda familiar. Maybe if I get a closer look.

its me girl the primordial demon inside your brain get the fuck back to work

Of course, I will obey.

good girl best enforcer

Yay! Going back to the intercept point now!

Jesus fucking Christ that explains where ey went when he pissed her off so much they left the Levant for the first half of the ADs. I have got to make sure not to blow this one.

Now a good spot near the pyramid. I want to be able to see her on the stairs for the actual hit, but would like to be able to be a bit closer for the confirmation.

"Un cacao un cacao!

Itztli! Cualli in itztli!"
[One cacao pod one pod! Obsidian! Good obsidian!

Fucking finally, and right at the base of the pyramid. I need to make sure to not. I repeat not get too distracted with it, but I can have a bit of convo and browse touristy while I wait. Nice and non-suspicious.

"Ca ticmomachiltia, cihuātzintlé. Yeceh ahmo nicneltoca in ticpiya tlein cualli in ahmo yuhqui in ōnicnōcuīli in Europa."
[Truly you have knowledge, revered lady. But I do not believe you possess anything finer than what I acquired in Europe.]

Ahh, in itztli Itztlampa, ahmo cualli. Zan xictlapāna ce...ce botella. Achi cualli.
[European obsidian is no good. Just break a bottle. It's better.]

Still no snitch on the stairs, so I can have fun with this, but I am keeping an eye out.

Also, this person is almost certainly a mythos, lets see if I can guess what kind.

"Ca cencah cualli in noyāhual. Xicmottili: nimitzmottitīz, auh in ihcuāc — ahmo "intlā," ca in ihcuāc — ticmomachiltīz ca oc cencah cualli, tinēchmopalēhuilīz in zan achitzin. Nicchixtoc ce nocnīuh — ahzo zan ce nohuīcalpo. Nicnequi ce tēhuān niyez, īhuān occē īxtli"
[My blade is very good. Behold: I will show it to you, and when — not "if," when — you acknowledge it is better, you will assist me in a small thing. I am waiting for a friend — perhaps merely a colleague. I want someone with me, and another set of eyes.]

"Ahmo ninocāhuaz in ōmpa tlatzacuia in tepozcalli. Auh in ihcuāc — ahmo "intlā," ca in ihcuāc — ticmottilīz ca oc cencah cualli in noitz, tiquimocōhuīz, cihuāpiltzintlé"

[I will not stay past the last bus. And when — not "if," when — you see my obsidian is better, you will buy it, O Noble Lady.]

In ītech pōhui in tiānquiztli, ahnōzo in ixquich teocuitlatl nicpiya — in catlehhuātl oc achi tepitōn, ca yehhuātl nicmacaz. Ahzo nāuhtzontli īhuān mahtlācpōhualli in tomin in tlatlatīltlācah. Miec tlamantli.
[Market rate, or all the cash I have on me — whichever is less, that's what I'll pay. About 1800 split between a few types of fuel person currencies.]

Ca yeh.

[ok bet]

Ca yeh.

[bet]

*quickly skims over her wares to pick out a really great axehead*

"Yeceh ahmo nicmati tlein īpampa timotequipachoa in tepozcalli, in ye ticmocāhuilia in motequiuh. Ahnōzo ticmihtalhuia ca in timopachoa in ītech in Tōnatiuh Ītzacual, ca ye motequiuh?"

[But I don't know why you trouble yourself about the bus, when you have already left your duty? Or do you say that leaning against the Pyramid of the Sun counts as your work?]

"Ca cihuāpiltzintlé, ca tehhuātzin ōticmonēxtili, ic ca huel neltiliztli. Auh in āxcān, xicmottili in oc cencah cualli tlateconi in ōtiquittac."

[O noble lady, you yourself uncovered it, so it is quite evidently true. And now, behold the finest axe you have ever seen.]

"Auh in miquiztli īpampa in tlācachīhualiztli, ca noāxcā? Ca yuhqui. Nicnocāhuilia. Yeceh ahmo yeh in oc cencah cualli tlateconi, ahmo yeh in oc cencah cualli itztli in ōniquittac. Ahmo niquimmauhtīz in tlatlatīltlācah ic notlateconi — yeceh xicmottili in nocuchillo."

[And death by childbirth, that's mine? So it is. I allow it. But that is neither the finest axe nor the finest obsidian I have seen. I won't frighten the fuel-people with my axe — but behold my knife.]

"¿Tehhuātl ticmocāhuilia? ¿Ac mach tehhuātl, in nicān tihuītz inic ti—?"
*quimottilia in cuchillotzintli*
"Ca quēmahcatzin, Tonāntziné, cemihcac nimitznotlazohcāmachiltīz, ca ōtinēchmomāquīxtilih. Nimitznotlātlauhtilia: mācamo xinēchmoxīpēhuili."

[You'll allow it? Who on earth are you, coming here to—

*beholds the revered knife*

Of course, O our revered Mother, eternally shall I give you thanks, for you have delivered me. I beseech you: please do not flay me.]

"Ahmo tleh. Ca cualli in motlahtōllo īxpan in Yancuīc Tlamantiliztli. Zan ōnicamanāloh. Auh yeceh — cē cihuātl ōquiyōlihtlacoh in Tecolōtzin, in āxcān tlehcōz in īpan Tōnatiuh Ītzacual. Ca niquihtoa: ahmo temōz. Xitlachiya: coztic in ītzon, mācuīlli xocpalli īhuān chicuacēn mahpilli inic huēyi, achi tomāhuac, ahzo quiquēmi texohtic anteojos īhuān cē Yankees cap. In oc nicān niyez, nicmictīz in cāhuitl. Ahzo nel nitlacōhuaz — ca huel cualli in motlateconi. ¿Iyetl?"
[No worries. Your legend is fine in the eyes of the New Order Of Things. I was just joking. But — a woman has offended the revered Owl, who today shall ascend the Pyramid of the Sun. I declare it: she shall not descend. Watch for her: yellow of hair, five feet and six fingers tall, a little plump, wearing blue anteojos and a Yankees cap. While I'm still here, I will kill time. Perhaps I'll even truly buy something — your axe is very good. Wanna smoko?]

"Ca huēyi nomahuizo, Mictēcacihuātzintlé."
[Great is my honor, O revered Lady of the Dead.]

"Quēmah. Auh zan xinēchtōcāyōti Temictiliztli."
[Sure. And just call me Killing.]

"¿tlein motōcātzin?"
[and what's your good name?]

"Ahmo nicpiya in yancuīc. Auh in notōcā in ye huehcāuh, ca oncah... Ca ōcatca. Mā xinēchmotlapohpolhuili."
[I do not have a new one. And my name of long ago, it is... It was. Please forgive me.]

I could be so funny right now, but I'm not evil.

I mean I am, but I don't see Marge Vessey yet.

"Hmm. 'Mā xinēchmotlapohpolhuili' — ca cencah huēyac inic tōcāitl. In Thursday ca huel cromulent, yeceh ahmo motech pōhui. Auh in nehhuātl, ca ye notōcā: Bat Qayin Kryptos Violet, Trismegistus Lesbiakos ītech nipōhui — lajchaʼ bʼaktuun, waxaklajuun kʼatuun, oxlajuun tuun, wuk winaal, kanlajuun kʼiin; wak Ix, wuk Yax — ór fyrirsát Skarð. Prōtos. Ic in Ix, ca ye noāxcā. Nicnemilia: Mācuīltzacualli. Ahnōzo zan Occel, intlā ticnequi in zan melāhuac."

[Hmm. "Mā xinēchmotlapohpolhuili" is rather long as a name. Thursday is very cromulent, but doesn't suit you. And me — my name is already: Bat Qayin Kryptos Violet of Trismegistus Lesbiakos — lajchaʼ bʼaktuun, waxaklajuun kʼatuun, oxlajuun tuun, wuk winaal, kanlajuun kʼiin; wak Ix, wuk Yax — ór fyrirsát Skarð. Prōto. So Ix is taken. I'm thinking: Five-Pyramid. Or just Occel, if you want it plain.]

"Ca quēmah, ca nehhuātl in Mācuīltzacualli. Auh in nocnīhuān, ca zan Occel nēchtōcāyōtiah."

[But of course — I am Mācuīltzacualli. And my friends, they just call me Occel.]