"Please don't strap me down with a bunch of bondage equipment in a time dilated dungeon with no food for weeks at a time while randomly breaking some of my bones and raping me over the course of several subjective months."

"It did do wonders for Danny."

"I will arrange remedial tutoring for you."

"So you thought you got the cartariod, but he didn't bleed out?"

"Why only one bite?"

"It just felt weird ok."

"Cartariod tastes pretty ok but jugular is better."

"Would shooting be better? It's not very fun but if you just need to pass."

"I like pouncing but it just feels weird to actually kill someone."

"Gay."

"It's a figure of speech we can still snog."

"Not you cutie. You're going to proc my rez for me.

Just let me take my clothes off."

"This is a nice jacket, and magically hiding the bloodstains doesn't work as well when they're mine."

"Ok. It's not the full moon so I will need a few minutes to change and will only be like a normal wolf."

"Just borrow my axe, or a gun if Chase has one."

"Sorted, our kid."

"Ok, so I just put it up to your head and shoot?"

"Yeah, I don't use the safety."

"So I hold it like this then pull the trigger, do I need ear protection?"

"You're literally a werewolf just squeeze it."

"I know you skipped classes for your weird dog holidays but you passed suicide you know how shooting someone in the head works."

*bang*

Hi Dad, bye Dad.

"Easy as."

"Now we just grab a guy, and hold him down while you shoot him."

"Ok."

"I mean a werewolf with a gun name is a bit odd, but just get good at shooting afterwards."

"I guess if you hold him down I could try for the jugular?"

"Mate, you're gonna be Krypt in no time."

"Professor Tan said whores and hobos are the easiest. It does feel a bit gross though."

"He marks down for those. Also, we aren't allowed to just do 'deserving' targets only, but we can try to find one that is at least a bit of a cunt."

"Like a cop?"

"Bang on."

"I was thinking a pimp or a landlord, but now I have an idea."

"Rock, paper, scissors."

"Rock, paper, scissors."

"Rock."

"Paper."

"So Chase is the bait?"

"No."

I'm not nearly as on board with the ACAB thing as Chase, but I looked into the local vice squad a little and look forward to Hunting the upjumped Helot he's sending my way.

"Hey hot stuff looking for a good time?"

Ahhh I'm so bad at this, I should have asked Lilith for tips or something. I'm not qualified to be a hooker.

"Maybe how much are we talking?"

Talk about an easy collar. This bitch must be new.

"20."

Wait is that too low, am I a cheap whore?

"Upfront, after depends on what you get."

Good save, good save.

"Blowjob and take it up the ass."

"Up yours or mine?"

I guess you can't proc rez from embarrassment.

"Both, 20 now 40 after."

"Sounds good."

"Now get in the car."

Yes it worked!
Wait.

"20."

"Right."
*cash money*

"Now get in the car."

"Of course honey."

Did I just call him honey? I'm going to kill myself. I'm literally gonna kill myself so I can cry to Dad.

"By the way you are under arrest. But blow me hard enough and I might be able to get you out on parole."

"Actually, you're under arrest."

"We find you guilty of being a Helot and a pig oink oink."

"How the fuck did you get in my car."
*floors it*

Saturus

*screech*

"What!? Calling all units calling all units."

"I smashed your pig squealer.

Do it Danno."

Ok reached my hand through while they were talking and...

*recline*

*bites*