"Oh, you don't need to, on account of I'm very talkative right now, I would tell anybody anything if they prevented me from going and finding people who weren't assholes to talk to instead."

"...You have said as much.  But it will only last six days?"

"Yeah. After that they are running the risk that I can flip them off and teleport away I guess."

"What do you know about what kind of supernatural powers you are likely to get?"

"Probably not teleportation but it wouldn't be insane? It's going to have some kind of really galaxy brained opposition to my backlash but that can mean a lot of things and I am not unusually good at guessing on controlled multiple choice tests when they're about espers I've never heard of before, if I had teleportation it'd be like, I could get away from people but when backlashed feel compelled to stay around them and have to navigate that, or something."

"Hm.  - Lie to me."

"Uh, I love ice hockey?"

"Thank you.  ...I don't know that information is the only thing my employers will want out of you," she notes.

"Espers run in families but not a lot. You'd have to clone me thousands of times to get another one and that's if people here can awaken after all. I would really rather they not do that and if you want me to do more calibration lying so you can tell them it will not so much work I can do that."

"Please do."

"Uhhhh. My name is Chad. I'm from Florida. Everything that's happened to me in the last day or so has seemed just really super normal. It would be thrilling to be cloned thousands of times and would work amazing at getting people baby future espers. I think very highly of your profession - sorry -"

"Kidnapping or the rest?"

"Rest of it did not sound amazing either."

"I understand a usual person on this planet to think favorably of my work, and only to hate that I'm better at it than those working for organizations they prefer."

"I mean, it'd make a cool movie if you're into movies and also the specific genre of movie, I guess, that doesn't mean it's good that you go around doing assassinations and sabotage and kidnapping and theft and I forget what else was on there in real life, these are not victimless crimes, have you considered art fraud? Art fraud is kind of cool."

"I have at times committed art fraud, incidentally to other missions.  But I am not often the one who chooses what aims I work toward."

"Well that's another thing that does not sound super cool about your job. Unionize or something."

"Are you pressured towards the comedic because of your magical anxiety or for other reasons?"

"I'm pressured toward talking at all because of the magical loneliness and I am not giving myself time to have second thoughts about making quips for the same reason but I do normally think of quips I could be making while I am having conversations, I just usually have somewhat more tact and/or ability to not be having the conversation if it does not spark joy."

"What does spark joy in you, usually?"

"Usually I like to read books. Guess what I can't do now. It makes me feel like I have fucking brain damage. Which like, I kind of do, except for it being magical. I play Civilization which I suspect I also can't do."

"- Hm."  She sounds somewhat distracted; a message that's appeared on the car's screen is taking up most of her attention.  It's mostly in maybe-Russian, but if he can decipher literally any text he can spot his name in there.

He can in fact recognize his name in the middle of a soup of Cyrillic. "Oh boy is that about me. How exciting. Are there spy code words in there and they didn't give me one? I'm not like, Subject Thirty-Seven or something?"

"...You do have one.  It is not as much about you as you would perhaps expect."

"Oh what's my cool codename. I hope it's better than Subject Thirty-Seven because that's awful and I'm just not at my best regarding creative codename schemes."

"There have not yet been thirty-seven arrivals from other worlds.

"But there have been several, and one of the more recent ones claims to know you without having in this world been told your name."

"Weird. I guess not actually weirder than this being a thing at all. Who is it?"

"A 'Martin'.  What year is it, in your world?"

"I don't know a Martin? I guess it's possible he like reads my blog but I don't put my real name on it... it's 2025 there."

"Well, apparently he's from 2030 and only met you that year."

"Oh... I really wanna know what powers I have but I don't really want your bosses to know, I want that to be a surprise for them... if it even works like that which I guess it might not because, freaky alternate universe situation..."

She voice-types something in Russian while executing a U-turn.

"My bosses suspect it may work out... compatibly.  You would have a more favorable opinion of parties which tried to unite you with such a person?"

"That would be really nice!! I could be slightly less dying of needing a hug at all times!!"

"...Tell me how you feel about the idea of occasionally stopping for hugs."

"I mean on a basal emotional level super fucking desperate but it might delay getting me in arm's reach of a compatible esper - like, if he'll hug me, what led your guys to suspect this, is he like my partner from the future or something -"

"They have not communicated this to me.  Nor his claim of what your powers will be, though it seems he has made one."

"Wow I have so many conflicted feelings about this whole kidnapping sitch. Is he kidnapped too or did he just land in an area your guys already controlled."

"He is not yet kidnapped."

"- well my positive regard for somebody putting me in hug range of a compatible esper is substantially mitigated by them kidnapping him to do it, but maybe this planet doesn't have, like, safe conduct guarantees or anything like that which you could use to let him give me humanitarian visits while I remain kidnapped and he remains not kidnapped, that sort of sounds like the kind of thing you might not have invented on Planet Spy Thriller."

"Do your thoughts on this change if he is also 'awakening'."

"Oh no if he's also awakening you should probably kidnap him and drop him in my lap unless some more legitimate enterprise has other espers available he could go to instead. That shit kills people."

Wryly - "Will do.  What are your other conflicted feelings about being kidnapped?"

"Well you're being considerate so far about my horrible magical condition's exotic care needs and I will find it a great story later on assuming nothing irrecoverable happens to anybody about it. And also you hit my babysitter in the head and are whisking me away to unscrupulous captors."

"I..."  She trails off.  "Hm."

"I would not expect that to be, like, news, to you."

"...I would not want to bring you to anyone who would harm you.  Above some threshold."

"We are strangers and so far what I know about your threshold is that it permits kidnapping and that's not a super strong start."

"It is new for me to have a goal of this kind."

"What, did you get religion - sorry that is also the kind of thing I would usually think and not say -"

"I suspect you of having some sort of subtle mind control power already and perhaps being a very sophisticated liar.  But if things are at least somewhat as they seem, perhaps I'd be better off as your pawn than that of my current masters."

"I don't have my powers yet, they don't come in till the end of the week! And if I had them I wouldn't use them because they'd rack up backlash that wouldn't go away by itself and I don't even know for sure if this Martin guy is compatible! And even if that weren't a factor mind control is wrong though I guess this would sure be a strong test case for that belief since you have created a really adversarial situation!"

"I acknowledge that you allege this."

"I would offer to attempt to lie more convincingly to calibrate your spy thriller powers but this is a really bad condition under which to try to do that."

"Why so, exactly?"

"The pressured speech and also like I don't know what you'd even find plausible which I think is part of lying convincingly normally? I usually don't talk to people I'd want to lie to and if it comes up I like doing an exact words kind of thing because it amuses me with my own cleverness so I don't have practice."

"Mm.  How do you feel about the thought of me being tortured."

"I am against literally anyone being tortured ever but if I have to like, rank this eventuality versus other ones I need more information."

"Where would you go, if you had the choice?"

"Home."

"Even above meeting the other alleged esper?"

"There's espers at home and I think I can survive awakening without guiding, it's not like I can't breathe or anything. It'd be good if he got to go home too. Why, do you have a Send Interdimensional Visitors Home button?"

"No, I initially meant 'where on this planet'.  ...Or the moon."

"God, I don't know, I was doing tolerably with the folks you kidnapped me from but it's not like I really get their deal either. I asked the first person I met to call me an ambulance but they don't know how espers work on this planet and I'd wind up handcuffed to a hospital bed in Solipsism Hell probably. Directly into this Martin guy's lap, maybe, and perhaps between the two of us we could figure out not being kidnapped somehow."

"...My colleagues establish that he's likely to be lying about his name.  They have not pressed him on the matter, and it's not as if, if more of what he said is true, you would recognize his true one."

"Yeah I am not a social butterfly when I'm in my right mind. I guess there's names you could have said where I'd've been like 'from math class?' but I do not know a lot of people. If permitted to continue unimpeded from the beginning of my awakening without waking up in another universe I would presumably make a lot of friends for mental health reasons. I guess I might have taken up the practice of poking every young adult emergency room admit who wasn't obviously a trauma case? That would explain how I would've been acquainted with someone who was in five years awakening."

"Elaborate on how this would explain that."

"Esper awakenings happen within a certain age range and some of them wind up in the ER because they suddenly have really intense symptoms of some kind and not all of those would have to be awakenings, which are pretty rare in the general population. But espers can check by touch whether other people are espers. So in principle someone can just go to an ER, if they're an esper, and the nurses will be like, oh, thank you, I had my suspicions about the coma case in room four, while you're here can you also check out this weird psychosis presentation, and actually just everyone who is not literally full of shrapnel or something, and then the visiting esper can see which of those people has a magical problem instead of a normal one. If he's awakening and wound up in the ER and I-in-five-years have the habit of doing this, then we'd've met. But most espers don't do that because you get so many false alarms, people just come down with symptoms for normal reasons way more often even in the relevant age range, and even if you did do it you wouldn't be likely to find a compatible one because that's a whole 'nother layer of luck."

"Thank you for elaborating."

"Kind of suggests I'm gonna get lousy powers. If I get good powers I'd be pretty busy and would not want to be in the emergency room poking people all the time."

"If they were claimed to be something entirely useless I would expect to have been told this."

"Well I hope they're not like, usable for spy thriller shit and not for anything good, though I don't immediately know what that'd be."

"I know that there are measures in place to keep me from defecting beyond the ones I am regularly made aware of."

"I have no idea how you entered this line of work in the first place but I gotta tell you that sounds pretty fucked up."

"I was selected for it as a small child."

"Not beating the fuckupedness allegations."

"If you come into possession of powers which are useable for 'spy thriller shit', and a way to handle your backlash, you would aid me in managing these consequences?"

"Uh, maybe? Probably but there's a lot of hidden assumptions in there?"

"Elaborate."

"Like, I don't know, I'm not from a spy thriller universe so I don't have a clear sense of how this would go down, if I turn up with teleportation and I can teleport you and apparently-not-named-Martin someplace thanks to an opening you create for me to do that without getting shot then sure? Sounds good? I bet lots of shady yet legally distinct governments would be happy to have you and I don't know if governments come in non-shady at home let alone here?"

"Based on what I know of the handling of other agents, the measures may be designed specifically to be more impactful in the cases where I abruptly have reason to consider ethical matters of importance."

"What does that m- does that mean hostages? Okay well if I can teleport I'll save hostages, sounds great."

"It means something like hostages.  I have no personal connections they might draw on, but perhaps it matters little to you whether they would be strangers to me."

"Well that just sounds like the thing to do is permanently cripple this sketchy org's ability to kidnap people because if they're total randos then there's no shortage of those."

"It is not clear whether this would be within my capabilities."

"Well it's certainly not clear to me either, all I know about them is that they suck and sent you. Do they have a spooky spy thriller name like The Shadow Hands or some shit."

"...You make many predictions based on this 'spy thriller' concept."

"Is it working?"

"Yes.  Your code name is Midsummer, though."

"Oh that's way better than Subject Thirty-Seven, I don't even hate that."

"I'm glad.  Will you cooperate with kidnapping Martin?"

"I remain dyspraxic and tied up. I would I suppose make tolerably good bait or something? I don't know how to kidnap people."

"Would you follow me conveniently and with no attempt at escape while I retrieved him or would I have to leave you tied up in the car," she clarifies.

"Please don't leave me alone tied up in the car that would be really bad."

"We will pass other people to whom you could theoretically escape.  Would you try?"

"Well the last time I asked a random stranger for help she was really nice except at some point in the process from there my location was leaked to the Shadow Hands or whatever they're called, so I'm not sure what my realistic scope for improvement is? I will not get into a tinted window limo with a stranger who says 'hey kid do you want legitimate custody and a Snickers bar', any asshole could say that. If somebody is instead like 'hey kid I'm a mad scientist and I can get you home! Look! Your mom is clearly visible through this portal!' then no promises."

"Then it seems we have a conundrum."

"To be clear my mom would have to in fact be clearly visible through the portal. If you have functional mad scientists who can do that who are also running around with access to realtime data on where you and/or Martin are it seems like you might have bigger problems?"

"Hm.  - Your previous chaperone said you should not be hit on the head?"

"Yes, in my universe which is not a spy thriller doing that injures people's brains. If you have a concerningly detailed arsenal of drugs you could name them till I recognize one and then I probably react normally to that one, or you could be super reckless with my safety mental and/or physical, you're the boss."

"I want you unharmed," she mutters, maybe more to herself than to him.

"No concerningly detailed drug arsenal or you don't wanna rattle 'em off?"

"I'm still considering bringing you with me."

"You could like leave my hands tied up and connect that to something you were holding so I cannot leap at the siren call of going home to Ren."

"What other situations might tempt you besides going home to your mother."

"I dunno, spy thriller universes have pretty low baseline credibility of random people's ability to do much of anything useful. Because they are full of spies."

"If there's a portal, I may want to get all three of us through it rather than preventing you."

"Rough on Martin who might want the mad scientist to send him to his own universe of 2030. Like, imagine how slow the internet will be by comparison, or something."

"You're very funny," she says, without a hint of laughter.  But also without obvious sarcasm.

"I'll be here all week. Presumably."

"...Given the circumstances as you understand them, is there anything I might do to alleviate your suffering in the next few minutes?"

"You're talking to me. Given that you are trying to simultaneously drive a car that is probably the best we can do here."

"...I can safely participate in high-speed chases through city centers.  An empty stretch of country roads and unbusy highways don't pose much of a challenge."

"Oh well in that case we could try some kind of simultaneous cuddling sort of operation perhaps."

"Perhaps."  She's still limited by the basic configurations of cars, but he can have a hand - no, half an arm?  Around him.  With the hand... there.  On the top of his shoulder.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome.  ...I do not anticipate us coming across a portal today, for the record."

"You low key got my hopes up there when you were treating the mad scientist possibility as worth factoring in!"

"Sometimes things happen which I do not anticipate!"

"That one seems really predictable but perhaps I have not watched enough spy thrillers to know why it caught you by surprise."

"How do you mean?"

"I barely mean anything. I'm saying things for attention and not because I have things to say. I hate it. It was something like, maybe there is a spy thriller trope, that I'd know about if I had watched enough movies, and which would give me the ability to predict whatever just happened, where you treated the mad science portal like a serious factor in the upcoming shenanigans and then I derived that there was a non-negligible chance of it and you did not expect me to do this. But I'm not sure I have ever watched an entire spy thriller all the way through, I've just like, seen trailers for them, been next to people on airplanes who were watching them, like that."

"...There is a non-negligible chance of there being a portal to your world at some point.  I do not expect to encounter it today."

"Via mad science or what?"

"Presumably the same science that brought you here, however you would class that."

"There were no obvious perpetrators on either end. I just wound up in another universe suddenly for no apparent reason. If that happens again I could just as easily wind up in some third universe."

"The same kind of science," she clarifies.

"Yeah I guess if you could controllably repeat the phenomenon you could test it on hamsters or something but how are you going to tell where they wound up?"

"I am not yet privy to the considerations of this new technology.  I expect to be able to learn more in time."

"Is it -" Yawn. "Your guys who are working on it or somebody else or are we talking, like, five assorted state and nonstate actors are - are racing."

"A race which the Canadian government has just won."

"Oh cool then you can just like drop me off at the halls of... Parliament..." Yawn.

"Haru?"

"Thaaaaat's my name."

- She grips his shoulder and shakes it a little.

Nope he's out now.

When he wakes up, it's slowly, and he's alone in the car.  He's been moved to the back seat.

There's something fabricish and structured blocking the windows, and a few objects next to him on the seat.  A bottle of water, some unrecognizable snack packets that are neither Cheetos nor Cheez-its but maybe something between them, a watch with a timer ticking up from 22:47 in seconds.  There's also a blanket wrapped around his feet in addition to the one he was shawled in previously.

"I'M AWAKE! I'M AWAKE COME BACK PLEASE HELP I'M AWAKE PLEASE PLEASE -"

This has no effects discernable to Haru.

Well, he'll give up eventually.

At 48:14 on the watch, the car unlocks itself, and a few moments later Svetka tears the door open.  She sees he's awake - "I am so sorry - I hope this will help - get in."

And a figure scrambles/is pushed into the backseat next to Haru and clutches his hand.

Haru bursts into tears and lurches as far in the direction of the Existent Person as his present captivity situation will allow.

Existent Person lets himself get lurched on and also gets kind of sniffly.

Svetka clears the objects out from underneath him and the screens from the back windows.  "Come on, we've got to move - let's get you buckled -"

- Existent Person is clearly prioritizing cooperating with Svetka over glomming onto Haru.  Including when she snaps some cuffs around his wrists.

Though once she leaves him to get the rest of the car in order and start peeling out of the parking garage, he snuggles back up.  (Well, as best he can with all the abrupt shifts in momentum.)

Haru catches his breath as best he can even in the brief gaps of the guiding.

"Hi, Haru."

"Hi. You must be Martin or possibly some non-Martin guy who is aliased that way?"

"His name is Julien," Svetka projects from the front as she drifts the car around a corner.

"Hi Julien. Sorry I'm such a mess. I bet I'm a lot more put together in five years or whatever."

"- Yeah, you are.  Uh.  It's fine, though.  I mean..."

"Did you already tell our spy thriller kidnapper friend or anybody what my powers are gonna be or might that just as well stay a surprise in case it matters end of week?"

"Oh, you have - invisibility and flying and imperceptibility and intangibility and stuff."

"Whoa that's actually really good."

"Yeah."  He presses his head into Haru's shoulder.

Lean. "So I can't read so I have no idea how long I was even in here so I don't know how much I should be reading into that information, how is being kidnapped going for you."

"Oh, I mean... I really like the part where I haven't been tortured, I guess.  And now there's a you, so.  Yeah."

"I tried very hard to wake you up," Svetka fawns - they're coming out of the parking garage now and weaving in and out of traffic - "And to be quick once it was clear I should leave you.  We last spoke less than two hours ago."

"I have no idea why I passed out, I'm not like tied up to the point of having trouble breathing or anything. I have maybe been tied up for long enough that I have to pee though of course it would be understandable if in the spy thriller universe no one ever has to do that at inconvenient times and you did not plan for it."

"I suspect there was some sort of drug which your previous supervisor had in defense.  The timing indicates that there may have been some residue on my glove.  I am very relieved it does not seem to have done you harm.  ...Can you wait until we are not in a high-speed car chase."

"If it's high-speed enough probably! I think in a movie I expect fewer than ten minutes to be devoted to a single chase scene. Who's after us?"

"My employers."

"Aha. I have given them the working title the Shadow Hands because the 'spy thriller universe' model keeps paying off and she hasn't said what they actually call themselves," he explains to Julien. "She told me my codename though, apparently I'm 'Midsummer."

"Okay."  ...He pulls enough of the blanket off of Haru to get some proper skin contact, at least if they also get his shirt collar out of the way.

"They're actually just S.H.A.D.O.W.  As an acronym," Svetka admits.

OH fuck yes skin contact please and thank you. "Oh my god I don't have enough language puzzle ability right now to figure out what that probably stands for but I bet it's incredibly stupid."

"How old are you?"

"Uhhh it might or might not be my birthday because interdimensional transit is confusing. I am somewhere near my eighteenth birthday and haven't had cake about it yet. Why?"

"I just didn't know!  Uh.  Uh, happy birthday..."

"Wait, were we - no I think I can successfully think better of asking that question actually so how about I don't. Uhhhh how old are you?"

"Twenty-two."

"Huh so you're a relatively late awakening, I bet that was a surprise. More than it already is every time anyway. ...you're holding it together really fucking well for an awakener, I don't even have a guess."

"IIIIIII am scared of things.  Which has kind of just been, the appropriate emotional reaction here."

"Yeah I guess that makes sense what with the being kidnapped business. Though like appropriate emotional reactions can only take you so far, I was in fact left alone in this car for some amount of time but did not wind up on the appropriate emotional reaction to that."

"I'm sorry that happened to you."

"Yeah me too. Were you like really hard to kidnap? I was pretty easy to kidnap. She broke into the house and knocked out my babysitter, because apparently you can just do that to people in spy thriller universe, and then I went very quietly, considering."

"I kind of got it twice.  Once from on my way to the hospital, by, I guess someone else from S.H.A.D.O.W., and then this person had to fight them for me."

"Gosh a whole fight scene. Was it cinematic?"

"I was blindfolded."

"What a ripoff. Spy movie universe and you don't get to watch the fight scene. - this person's name is Svetka. She's an internationally famous spy thriller person because that's a thing here."

"Fantastic."

"Is there anywhere you have wanted to visit?" Svetka wonders, speeding up to tear through some construction barriers. "I cannot yet drop you off at the halls of Parliament."

"The halls of Parliament was metonymy. I am somewhat impaired in enjoying most possible tourist attractions right now and even if I were raring to go to the zoo I'd want to stop somewhere with a more rapidly accessible bathroom first."

There's a trench cut through the pavement which Svetka is not slowing down for.  Surely that little lip of upturned asphalt isn't enough to ramp them across, is it?  - No, but that conveniently-positioned weird wagon apparently is.  The car thuds on the landing hard enough that it seems like it must have broken somehow, maybe, but nope, it barely drops any speed.  "It is more a question of what direction we aim out of the city in."

Julien starts hyperventilating.

Snuggle? Snuggles will help with the being scared? "Uh is there a direction that involves less cinematic chase scenes on the way, I don't think either of us is really in the mood."

"- Not so much a direction, no.  I can try to keep all four tires on the ground going forward."

"Thank you."  The thing with snuggles is that the two of them are currently subject to a lot of changes in momentum, so maybe Julien will just roll up their sleeves and get as much arm-based contact as he can.

Aw yisss arm based contact guiding is great. "Does it help if you are distracted or will it have to be purely selfish attention seeking on my part to propose conversation topics."

"It's - I mean, you can - I don't know.  It doesn't matter, you can propose conversation topics."

"Do I think of a good codename. Since I have powers worth codenaming."

"You're Traceless."

"I guess that's okay. A lot of the good stuff is taken. How did I meet you, was I poking people in hospitals even though I've got dungeoneer quality powers?"

"You rescued me from a dungeon and then kept somewhat in contact because of your backlash and because I'm majoring in dungeon mats.  So a nurse saw a text message from you and asked for you to come over."

"Huh. That's lucky I guess."

"I think she actually wanted you to check on somebody else.  They pretty much had me pegged for normal crazy."

"Was the other patient an esper?"

"No, none of them."

"Oh.

"Am I a good esper, did I like, rescue you well - obviously you're alive and stuff, I mean, but -"

"Yeah, you're really good.  You have a blog.  And a monster cat."

"Oh I already have the blog, that's cool that I have time to keep up with it though - how did I get a monster cat?"

"I actually have no idea.  He likes you and - doesn't really seem to like anyone else.  His name is Cricket; he can talk and stuff."

"That's a surprisingly good cat name, did I name him? Did he not already have a name?"

"Not one that he liked.  I remember from your blog post interview with him that other people had tried a bunch of things, including Cata.  - Which is funny because he used to be 4D."

"That is funny but it's not a good name."

Julien shrugs.

"Uh, your mom is doing fine; she seems nice..."

"My one is presumably worried to death about me and therefore not very fine but I guess I'm glad you're not telling me, like, surprise, she gets pancreatic cancer, or anything."

"Yeah.  ...My you is probably pretty worried, now."

"Yeah, probably, if you just disappeared out from under his nose!"

"Yeah, he -"

Svetka hauls on some lever or other and the car goes spinning, skidding to a stop perfectly parallel with and a few inches away from a building.

Plans seem to be to stay there, for a moment.

Clinging!!

"- hey, it's, uh, objectively not super okay but we have come to a stop?" Impaired snuggle.

Movement that might be a nod.

A car with similar driving patterns to their previous ones zooms by behind them.

"We may be able to enter normal traffic, in a moment."

"Okay.  ...Haru, do you.... I don't actually have a question, I was just trying to keep talking for you.  I don't know.  Do you have a favorite color."

"Dark blue, I guess? Oh do I get - esper colors -"

"Yeah, blue eyes.  And - dark, yeah, not like the white people kind."

"Neat. Subtle. Is it rude that all my questions are about my future self, I sort of assume anyone would be curious about their future self but maybe that's just me and you wouldn't want spoilers or something."

"Oh, no, I would really really want to know what my powers are going to be.  I mean, I do, I just don't have a way to find out."

(Svetka backs out of their impromptu parking spot and joins normal traffic.)

"Well, we could speculate. I don't off the top of my head know anyone with a fear backlash but there's gotta be things it's opposite."

"The you who's had a chance to interview a bunch of espers and, I guess had more time to collect other data, didn't have a very solid guess."

"Huh I guess once I'm an esper espers'll talk to me, that's cool. If, you know, I spend this time in a world with my blog and also espers in it. - Svetka, do you know how many interdimensional people are? Are they all from... esperverses?"

"I know of fewer than ten, but the appearances were increasing steadily.  And no, there seems to be a variety.  Though the odd coincidences are seemingly to be expected."

"What other kinds of weird coincidences?"

"The girl who identified your Xavier, for example.  Apparently her readings were suspiciously similar to some local ones, though less so than the two 'esperverses' are to each other.  ...I am not yet very familiar with the science, but this is what I was told."

"Readings? Like the appearances are twigging on something that is probably not literally a Geiger counter?"

"It produces a field of data that changes over several seconds and then fades, rather than being an approximately single number which one can collect indefinitely, but yes.  It is somewhat like that."

"Cool. Do they know anything about, like, why? Is anybody ahead of us on the going home via probably not the halls of Parliament train?"

"This I do not know."

"Who's 'your Xavier'?"

"When I showed up I asked the first person I saw to call me an ambulance and she was like 'how about instead I hand you off to this guy Xavier I am vaguely aware of who might be interested in babysitting you through your weird problem I've never heard of' and I was like 'that doesn't sound normal but I'm too magically brain damaged to dispute that' and the guy sent his niece to bring me to his house, and she and he were doing their best to look after me till Svetka kidnapped me. Which happened while he was out and she was in, because apparently one of the arrivals picked him off a list and was like 'that guy, I want that guy', so I guess at least two people think that guy is a respectable port of call for interdimensional travelers."

"That's wack."

"It's so wack! Svetka would it have inconvenienced you at all to kidnap me out of a hospital instead if I'd gotten to one?"

"No."

"That's exactly what I thought you'd say. So it all turns out the same either way I guess."

"You did not seem to think that the hospital would have been very good for your mental wellbeing."

"Nah, would've sucked, even hospitals that know espers exist are not necessarily equipped for every random psych symptom - that's probably why Future Me was with Mart- I mean Julien - but like they are pretty competent to keep a dyspraxic teenager from committing suicide probably so I'd've lived."

"...Do you think you would have died if you hadn't been tied up while Svetka was getting me?"

"Not necessarily, I would've first tried leaving the car to find somebody to talk to."

"Okay."  Lean.

Svetka pulls into a gas station.  "I am going to unbind you both.  Please remain as cooperative as you've been thus far.  I will be keeping ahold of Julien."

"Mmhm."

Keys keys knots knots.  The gas station's some weird alternate universe chain, Princess, and it apparently has public restrooms.  Svetka keeps a literal hand on Julien's arm on the way in.

He cooperates with this??  He cooperates with this.

"I have experimentally determined that I can if I've got to tolerate going to the bathroom with the door closed if someone is talking to me through it the entire time."

"...Fine."  The door here wants coins; Svetka feeds it a toonie and a quarter and herds them all into the room.  There are two stalls.

"Sorry, I am about as embarrassed as I have the emotional room to be and will catch up with the rest later."

"Mmhm."

"...Are you in high school now?" Julien fishes for a conversation topic.

"Right now I am in a convenience store named Princess but in the spirit you meant the question yeah."

"How was that going?"

"Fine pretty much? I do well in school. I was going to go to college and be a doctor but obviously this plan has been somewhat derailed."

"Yeah.  ...I kept trying to do my homework, while the other you was babysitting.  Now even if I get a power that still wants me to go back to college that'll probably have been worthless, I guess."

"Not even the interesting kind of homework?" He emerges to wash his hands.

"I mean, some of it.  Pretty hard, though.  At least at this level of - intellectual ability."

"God, yeah, I assume nobody's really sharp while they're awakening - no, that's not right, some people probably get like, hyperfocusing tendencies or something that can work out that way? - people are not as a rule really sharp while awakening but I'm illiterate and I hate it."

"I'm sorry.  ...You were reading a lot of Les Mis.  Like, really a lot.  So, uh, I can tell that would be rough for you."

"Huh, do I - yeah I bet I do, I like, get A's in French but that's high school curriculum, I bet I practice a lot if I have to be talking to people all the time anyway?"

"Yeah, you're fluent and onto working on something else."

Hands dry. "What else?"

"I don't remember."

Svetka switches to holding Haru's arm.  "If you're trustworthy to be left alone, Julien, Haru and I will go shopping?

"Yes, ma'am."

Then Haru can get steered out into the main area.  They sell balaclavas here; Svetka heads for them first and collects three.  "Anything you'd like?"

"What am I packing for, here, what's the ETA to halls of Parliament, do I need to be provisioning a week's campout or what."

"We will have another chance to make purchases later today."

"Doesn't really answer my question but okay. Now the question is do I recognize any of these products or are they all dimensional nonsense because no way can I read an ingredients list." What's on offer.

Various snacky things, mostly.  There are still Lay's potato chips and Cokes, though he doesn't spot any other brand matches.  Generally the niches are the same as he's used to, and it just seems like other things are sometimes filling them.

"I will share the timeline with you once it is developed."  Svetka grabs a pack of gummy snakes.

He'll take pretzels and some kind of candy bar with a picture of a raspberry on it and a bottle of water. "What's complicated about developing it, do you have to like make a ton of phone calls or something?"

"There is information I do not yet have, yes."

Julien emerges and comes over to hug Haru.

"Would you like anything, Julien?"

- Fine, he will not disappear his entire face into Haru in the middle of this gas station.  "...Should I?"

"Not especially."

Could he PLEASE disappear his entire face into Haru though that feels so much better -

Well, Svetka can shepherd them over to the checkout and its associated teenager who gives them all a weird look and then a scared look but ultimately lets them complete the transaction without incident -

"- Actually shoes?  Haru should have shoes?  If - if there are shoes here."

"There are not."

"It would be like a little weird for a convenience store to have shoes. It is not the thing bothering me the most at this time."

"But it could make a difference if - if something happens."

"If we run into too much broken glass to go around she can carry me."

"Okay."

Back to the car.  ...She re-handcuffs Julien but not Haru.

That makes sense because Haru is dyspraxic and can't shut up and Julien is paranoid and could probably make a creditable run for it. "Is it okay if I take off my shirt."

"Yes."  Julien starts taking his as off as is topologically convenient with the cuffs.

SNUGGLE oh that's way better. "Oh that's way better," he says because he can't shut up.

"Yeah."  Pet pet glom.

Svetka turns up the heat and goes back to driving.

"So what do you... do... you were studying dungeon materials, any exciting developments in the last slash next five years?"

"Uh, there's... there are definitely things - wow this feels better when you are also awakening - I also work at Starbucks.  Or used to.  I went in the first two days of my awakening but I didn't last very long through the second one."

"You went in to work while awakening?"

"I didn't realize that I was."  Nuzzle nuzzle.

"Mmmmmm - you went in to work while having awakening amounts of being scared of things??"

"Yeahhh.  I had to make this guy muffins, it sucked."

"Were you scared... of... the muffins... how does that work..."

"I was scared that if I didn't do perfect customer service that something really bad would happen.  - Also I was afraid that any food or water would poison me, so I wasn't having any."

"Oh no. Is that why you didn't buy any snacks. There is more than one way for awakening to kill you."

"- No, I just ate not that long ago, with the other you.  See?"  Where's the water bottle that Svetka left for Haru while he was alone there it is.  Julien will drink from it!  And grab a bag of cheese things while he's down there.

"Oh good. Please don't die."

"Okay."  Snuggle.  With his face on Haru's shoulder.  And specifically his mouth.  It's not a kiss!  But it is wet; he was just drinking water.

That's so fine though actually. "And I will try to also not die and I guess this time next week I will be able to fly - it sounds like you are maybe a bit ahead of me on the awakening timeline?"

"When did you say you started?"

"Well, it was like two a.m. on September eleventh when I got going but reference to external calendars then suddenly got a lot harder. I'm not sure exactly what time it was when I got yoinked because I was by then trying to go back to sleep. That's why I'm not sure if it's my birthday, my birthday's the thirteenth."

"...I think I'm probably more days in than you, then, yeah.  - What sort of things have you already written about in your blog?"

"It's about espers and dungeons and stuff. Nothing you'd need, like, access, to know, I just put together stuff from articles and sometimes I get an answer to a cold email. Sometimes I translate it into French."

"That's cute.  ...You're a good esper."

"I always wanted to be one, just, you can't enter an essay contest about it. ...I told Ren it wasn't worth it but that was when I thought I was the only person in the universe so I am pretty sure I will be pro this development overall when I'm done."

"Yeah, I think you are.  ...Mmmmm."

"We will be stopping at a hotel for the day and moving out of the city overnight," Svetka declares.

"What exactly is the holdup on the halls of Parliament."

"The portals to send you home do not yet exist.  The government is scrambling to collect new arrivals as they appear.  I will be better able to protect you while you wait out the research."

"Okay. Hotel sounds fine."

....In light of this Julien will tear into the cheese things.

Haru starts his pretzels. While Snuggling At All Times Maximally. "Are the hotel chains also different in this universe," he says vaguely into the silence.

"I do not know this.  Blue Door, Tipton, Hilton, Churn Dash, Outin' Inn?"

"We have Hiltons! I don't recognize the others though if they're just smaller I might have missed them. Except Outin' Inn which I would expect to have memetic Internet presence for the name alone."

"Strange."

"Yeah I'm sort of curious when all these chains were founded. The point of departure can't be any later than 1971 but it might be earlier than that. Or, like, it has to be because of the nonmatching countries, but."

"What countries don't match?"

"I forget the names of them. The Christmas themed one doesn't match."

"Aldovia?"

"Christmas themed?"

"They have a Christmas themed country called apparently Aldovia! Which I don't have but I guess that is not definitive evidence for you."

"I haven't heard of every country..."

"It's in Europe and they speak English, I would be way less confident if it were in central Africa."

"Oh, that is weird.  ...Do you want some of the," he checks the label, "Cheeziots?"

"Sure I'll try one." Theft of a Cheeziot. Cronch.

It is a cheesy potato-based puffed cylinder.

"...I'm curious to hear more about the other people you were with?"

"Xavier and his niece or I think actually some kind of complicated cousin situation that rounds to niece, her name was Ari. House kinda in the middle of nowhere, I think she doesn't usually live there but he had a second bedroom. He cooks. They have vat meat here!"

"What?"

"Like they can grow meat that isn't an animal. They do like, weird hybrids, you can get orca and stuff, it's cheaper and I found it indistinguishable except in shape, they still have the normal kind for like snobs and stuff but presumably a lot less."

"I don't want to eat that."

"Suit yourself? I doubt there is any in the Cheeziots though I cannot confirm right now because I cannot read."

"I'm a vegetarian," Julien nonchalants.

"For health reasons?"

"No."

"...we can talk about something else if this is not so much a talkativeness subject."

"- Sorry.  I'm sorry."  Cling.

"- I got found by a lady on the street, I didn't get her name, and she was sitting with me in a cab to the hospital but then at a stop light the driver got held up with a gun and they took me out."

"That's a lot faster than I got kidnapped, I guess I must have been one of the earlier arrivals."

"You were," Svetka confirms.

"And then I got asked a lot of questions, and blindfolded and taken some places, and then there was I guess a fight scene about me and here I am."

"Kinda questions did they ask?"

"Um, stuff about what I'd been doing, what my world was like - I guess it made it to you that I'd lied about my name..."

"Yeah she said Martin at first. She's got maybe freaky movie-character-quality lie detection? She had me lie to her presumably to calibrate that. I'm not good at it though."

"She is very scary and I will do whatever she wants."

"Noted."

Snuggle. "I think she has a tragic backstory, not that this has to affect anything about how scary you find her especially since you've got the dial turned all the way up no matter what."

"Oh?"

"I was selected for the program that trained me to do this at three, and took my first life at four."

"...Four what?  Not years old."

"Yes."

"I mean, I guess, how?  Were you already - showing signs of, of something...?"

"It was largely because of my parents' connections.  Not that this helped them, in the long run."