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Generated: Oct 19, 2021 12:35 PM
Post last updated: Feb 05, 2020 11:01 PM
Your charm so strongly works 'em
Druid Robin appears in the Beacon Hills Dating Sim
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Today, Beacon Hills High School prepares to welcome a new student! The halls buzz with rumors and gossip. She is the first new student they've had in years. Their sleepy little town could use some fresh meat, and who am I, the humble Narrator, to judge?

Welcome to Beacon Hills, Robin!

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Uh. 

What? 

...This is not where she was last she remembers. Beacon Hills? Why is she in Beacon Hills, reputedly the craziest place on earth? Is this a dream? 

"...Hello?" She asks the mysterious voice of exposition.

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As the narrator, my purpose here is to guide you through your experience here with minimal fuss. Today is your first day at school. Wouldn't you like to look around and explore? Who would you like to speak to first?

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...Robin is not an expert in weird magic, for all that she's her pack's Emissary. Mostly she does the little things any druid can do - minor protections, usually. She has never in her life encountered something as weird as this is. 

"This is a dream," she decides. It's gotta be. Why would anything powerful enough to transport her half-way across the continent and speak in her head bother with her?

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The students of Beacon Hills are all unique, each with their own story. Wouldn't you like to get to know them? Here comes your tour guide now! 

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"Hey. Apparently, I'm your tour guide."

Although Danny is charming enough and well-liked around the school, he is not one of the students you will be spending most of your time with.

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"Is he not?" She comments to the air. 

"Hi," she adds to Danny, "I'm pretty sure I'm dreaming but that's no reason to be rude - I'm Robin." 

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Since you are open to finding love with all kinds of people, there are many options available to you! However, Danny only has interest in men, so he cannot be your date.

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"...uh huh. Appearing back in high school has been a horrible start to my day. You're Robin? I'm Danny, and I guess we're stuck in the same vivid hallucination."

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"Finding love?" She asks, bewildered. 

"-I guess so," she adds to Danny, "Though I'm pretty sure if we both think we're hallucinating or dreaming it means one of us is a hallucination or dream." 

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"I'm not going to think about that one too hard. I guess I'll have a nice day of nostalgia until I wake up. Good luck with- all that."

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Now that Danny has introduced you to our school, have a look at some of the other charming people of Beacon Hills!

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She could speak to Harley! Harley is snarky and mistrusting, which makes her a good source for gossip if she doesn't like you, and a good repository of secrets if she does.

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She also spots Allison, stopping by her locker before heading to her first class. Allison is quiet and demure when she wants to be, but her enthusiasm for life, her principles, and her courage under fire make her a good person to have on your side.

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Erica Reyes, queen bee, has every boy in school salivating over her, and every girl wanting to be her. It's a welcome relief after years of unending bullying, so she makes sure to rub it in their faces.

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"Thanks?" She offers Danny, before the voice starts narrating people at her. 

(Aaaaaa???)

Ok, ok, just go with it. It's a dream, dreams are weird.

Who does she pick?

Erica sounds kinda intimidating, and Harley too, but Robin thinks she can handle quiet with hidden fire? Allison it is. 

She walks up to her - and stalls. What do you talk to people about in high school dating simulation dreams? Class schedules?

"...Um. Excuse me?" 

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She turns to greet her new friend!

"Yes? How can I help you?"

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"I'm Robin - I'm new," she starts, "And very confused!" Which is an understatement, "Do you know where I'm supposed to go to get my schedule?" 

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"Sure. I can just take you down to the office and we can pick it up there. I shouldn't be surprised they didn't give it to you. We're not known for how well the school runs."

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Allison leads the new girl throughout the school. It's been over a year since she was the girl, a welcome reprieve from a life of constant moving from town to town to follow her parents' hunting habits. She likes showing someone else the ropes.

Your relationship with Allison has increased!

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Hunting habits? Allison's parents are Hunters? 

Robin's human but sometimes druids get trouble from hunters, and she's part of a pack, too. She's not so sure about her choice now. 

...Maybe they're just. Wildlife hunters?

And this is a dream, right, so what does it matter?

Dilemma shoved aside for now, she gives Allison a bright smile, "Thanks! Being new is always scary, it's nice to meet a friendly face." She pauses, searching for another topic, "What are the teachers like here?" 

 

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"Most of them are really nice. Ms. Blake is friendly, Ms. Morrell is no-nonsense but good. Mr. Finstock can get a little lost in thought but he's very supportive. It's only really Mr. Harris you'll have to worry about."

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"What do I have to worry about with Harris?" She asks. Is he dangerous or just... your typical bad teacher? 

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“He’s horrible to his students. He picks favorites, he makes snide remarks, and he gives worse grades to people he doesn’t like.”

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Oh, that's not as bad as she'd thought it would be. Awful - it reminds her of what school was like before she got into magic and got picked up by the Starr pack - but not the level she'd expect considering. 

This whole thing has actually been pretty tame, so far, for a dream about Beacon Hills. 

"He sounds awful," she agrees, though. She hated the teachers like that when she was in school. Even when they liked her it was awful.

"I hate it when teachers play favourites like that." 

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“Things aren’t so bad otherwise. It’s not my favorite place to spend time, but it’s alright.”

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As Allison leads you through the school, you realize that despite her cheery exterior, Allison is not just a petty face. She is also an athlete with a strong sense of fairness. Stalwart and true, she would be a wonderful companion to have by your side in life!

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(Aaaa??) 

She hadn't been assuming she was just a pretty face! Most people are more than pretty faces. 

Alright, dating game. And a convenient topic, too!

"What is your favourite place to spend your time, then?"

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"Oh, I don't know. I like archery, but not enough people here are interested to start a club. I spend most of my time with friends."

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"So do I! Spend time with friends, that is. The rest of the time I mostly spend gardening, I suppose." And using the results of her gardening, among other things. 

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"Oh yeah? Do you grow the kinds of plants you can eat, or the kinds you show off?"

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"Both!" She says, "More useful plants than ornamental, but sometimes they can be pretty and useful. I have a very large herb garden, too. It's my pride and joy, my dearest sweetheart, I love that patch of leafy ground like it's my own child." 

She's joking. (Mostly.) 

"What do you like about archery?" 

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Your relationship with Allison has increased!

 

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"It takes focus, it's quiet, and I have a clear benchmark so I can know if I'm doing well. Or did you mean with a live target? I like the thrill of the chase."

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Thanks narration. 

"You hunt?" Again, animals, hopefully? Let's not have this turn into a scary Hunter dream, please. 

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"When the weather is good. We don't need to for food, so it's a hobby, you know? I did it way more before we moved here."

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"Is this area not good for it?" She asks. That would probably make sense, given all the weird things that pass through this town. 

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"Not exactly. I still like archery, but I have some comcerns about how to hunt in the right way."

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"Like, making sure you actually use the animal, not hunting just for sport, kind of concerns?" 

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"Yeah, something like that. It just seems wrong to kill when you don't have to."

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As a hunter, Allison often makes decisions about which shapeshifters to kill. Although the Argent family has a storied history as hunters, Allison has been working to change their legacy from one of necessary, brutal violence to one of protecting the weak and vulnerable. Although she is still willing to kill shapeshifters, Allison is not one to shoot first and ask questions later.

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And that seems to be the end of the tour!

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Ok, definitely a capital-h Hunter. Thanks, narration, she was happy living in her delusion. 

At least she sounds like the better sort? Though, also, it should be noted - Argent family?!??!

Ok, confirmation time.

"Thanks for the help!" She offers, a bit nervous, but still cheerful. "-Oh, I didn't get your name?" 

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"Oh, sorry! I'm Allison, Allison Argent. Do you need help getting to your next class, or was my tour thorough enough?"

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...ok then, confirmation attained. But damn it, she's never let reputation put her off someone before! 

"Well the tour was pretty thorough but the company would be nice, anyway, if you don't mind?" she suggests. "Just let me pick up my schedule, I guess?" Into the office to do the thing? 

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Inside the office, you receive your schedule. You may attend gym to increase your Strength, class to increase your Intelligence, and lunch to increase your Charm!

All three occur at the same time, twice a day.

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“What are you looking forward to?”

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She blinks down at the schedule, nonplussed. 

"...Gee, it's so hard to choose," she replies after a moment. "There's so many options." 

...Though that's actually pretty true, given the options available.

"I guess I'm looking forward to lunch," she decides eventually, "I'd like to meet your friends, if that's ok. Since mine aren't here." 

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"I'll introduce you to everyone!"

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Conveniently, lunch is next! They start to walk there. Many other students are making their way to the cafeteria. Robin will recognize none of them, but some of them recognize Allison. She seems popular enough, though none of them stop to talk to her, only smile and wave.

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Allisons leads Robin to her table.

"Everyone, I'd like you to meet Robin. She's new here, so I want everyone on their best behavior."

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Lydia, the school's most famous and infamous student, just smiles.

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"When am I not on my best behavior, Allison? Don't give the new girl the wrong impression."

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"Hey."

While Danny is usually friendly, today he is irrelevant because you cannot date him, and that seems to have made him much less pleasant to be around.

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There's also this student? He could be interested but he's not very interesting, so you can focus on the others.

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But what if she wants a friend she doesn't have to worry about being a part of this weird dating game? What then, narration? Also, rude!

"Hi again," she greets Danny. 

She gives Lydia a smile in return!

"Does that mean you're always behaving well, or that your best behaviour isn't very good?" She asks Jackson, before quickly glancing around to look for this apparently uninteresting student. 

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"His best behavior is worse than you can imagine."

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"I'm always the perfect picture of sainthood."

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The uninteresting student is at her table, but he's not very interesting. There are much more eligible bachelors and bachelorettes to choose from!

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She giggles a little at this exchange, and then when the narrator speaks-

Every contrary bone in her body immediately demands she pay attention to Uninteresting Guy. 

"Oh, you didn't introduce everyone," she tells Allison, "Who's this?" She smiles at him. 

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"Oh, uh, this is Brian."

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"Hey. Nice to meet you."

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"Nice to meet you too, Brian!" 

She looks around at everyone at the table, "So... Allison gave me the lowdown on the teachers, and I've seen what classes there are. Is there anything else to do around here? Clubs?" 

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Allison lists a few clubs.

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As you listen, your mind wanders. Lunch is a nice way to get to know people, but you shouldn't waste it all asking about clubs. Putting together clubs for you to attend would be too difficult for your poor narrator, when there are already so many options for you to choose from!

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"-and we don't have an archery club yet, but I'm working on it."

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...Ok, Robin has been known to get distracted sometimes but she was actually interested in that answer. This is very weird. Maybe just too much detail for a dream? 

"Maybe you should look for someone else who does archery, or failing that teach someone, first?" She suggests to Allison, "And then you could have a demonstration slash competition, drum up enthusiasm!" 

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"Maybe. Why, are you volunteering?"

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"I have been meaning to pick up some sort of athletic thing," she muses, "So, sure, I'd love to learn!" 

If she likes it, she can take the dream hint and look into archery when she wakes up. Also, getting to know Allison better! She's liked what she's seen so far, and the weird dream narration sure seems to want her to get to know someone. Gotta start somewhere!

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Your relationship with Allison has increased!

Your Charm has increased!

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Lunch ends. Where would you like to go next?

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Well, in the spirit of archery, maybe she should work on the most related stat?

In other words, Gym time!

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You arrive in gym class, ready for an hour of exertion! You see a few students, familiar and new!

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Allison is graceful and quick on the field; any clumsiness she might show walking around disappears in combat on the field. She gives a smile and a wave as she equips herself for hockey.

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Jackson is no slouch either, and he wants everyone to know it. He slings his stick over his shoulder as he surveys his competition.

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Although you don't recognize her, Cora Hale is a coiled serpent ready to strike. Every movement barely conceals fluid aggression, and her smile says that you don't stand a chance.

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Liam Dunbar, adorably wrong-footed by these stronger and smarter opponents, prepares himself. With an encouraging whisper to himself under his breath, he looks at you and your other classmates.

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Aw, adorable outmatched nervous boy, Robin feels a kinship. That was her, once upon a time!

She waves back at Allison, and offers Jackson a smile, but she thinks she'll try talking to someone new this class. She starts over to Liam, then pauses - is Brian here? She's probably gonna have to keep an eye out for him, given the narration's attitude. 

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An average lacrosse player and mediocre student, Brian will perform as well at hockey as he is capable of.

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Hmmm... She's already made her choice, she shouldn't change it now. Some other time, Brian the Unnoticeable! She waves at him while she continues towards Liam.

"Hi, I'm Robin, I'm new. Also, not the most athletic - you look less like you're ready to enter into glorious battle with a hockey stick than some of these people, mind if I stick by you?" 

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"I'm not exactly the best person to be around if things get heated."

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"Sure, but you're not gonna make things heated, right? We can stay out of the thick of things." 

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"...guess so, yeah."

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You and Liam are assigned to the same team! How lucky! As you train your physical body, you also find yourself noticing that Liam moves unnaturally well for a human!

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As long as he stays calm, he seems normal.

He's not very good at staying calm. He scores the most points of anyone on their team.

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You have increased your Strength!

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Huh. Werewolf? Something else?

(Thanks, narration.)

She does her best to keep up. 

"Nice going!" She says after, "-are you alright?"

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"Fine. I should go..."

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Concerned, she steps a little closer, though does her best not to crowd him. "You wanna go somewhere quiet to get some breathing room?" She offers/asks. She's reminded of one of the betas in her own pack, who always has issues with control. 

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Nod.

He still looks human, but might not for long.

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She reaches out to take his hand - from the outside, wrapping loosely around his wrist, for safety in case he loses control and pops claws. Hurting someone won't help anything if he does. Then she leads him out of the gym. 

Is there anywhere quiet nearby? Large enough they won't be too crowded, so neither of them feels trapped.

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She can lead him to the completely empty choir room! There are many seats but there's a nice, fairly open space in the front.

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"I'm fine, I just- I'm fine. The sun...the moon..."

The claws are out now, and fur begins to appear on his face and hands.

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The sun and the moon? Must be his mantra. The Starrs use a different one, but she can still help. 

"Hey, yeah, you're going to be fine," she agrees firmly, "Look at me, Ok?" She ducks down so she can see his face, "Focus, and tell me your mantra, Liam. Please, let me help you." 

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"...the sun, the moon, and the truth. The sun, the moon, and the truth. The sun, the moon, the truth..."

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"What three things cannot long be hidden," he finishes, as the signs of his transformation finally begin to fade.

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Your relationship with Liam has increased!

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Oh good.

(She should really take a moment at some point to figure out what all these increases are about, if she remembers.)

"That's it, you've got it," she reassures him, squeezing his hand, "It didn't take you long at all to get control back, and no one else saw." 

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"Thanks. So are you...good at meditation? It's supposed to help me with my anger management issues and uh, skin condition."

It's not a very convincing lie but it is almost charming that he tries, isn't it?

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Aww, it is charming!

She laughs, "I'm an Emissary, don't worry - a Druid attached to a werewolf pack. I know about the people who go bump in the night." 

"I am alright at meditation, though, if you want some help with it? Guided meditation can be useful." Among her duties: helping werewolves figure out how to chill out. You get good at guided meditation fast in those circumstances.

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"That would be good. It seems like everyone who wants to teach me is doing something else. They're trying, but it's already been a year."

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"Helping like this is what I'm for," she asserts, "Though it could definitely help to have your alpha involved, if you have one, I can do it alone."

She hopes he's not an omega, that won't be fun for anyone, especially with a family of Hunters in town, even if Allison's not the shoot-first type.  

(She does not remember the Beacon Hills' alpha's name, if she ever knew it at all. It didn't seem like an important thing to find out. What were the chances she'd run into him? Not very high, that's what.)

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“Scott’s a good guy, but I don’t think he’s ever really been angry like I get. It helped a lot, thanks.”

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And with your classes all done for the day, you head home to think about your first day at a new school. Meeting Allison and Liam certainly made the day more interesting. Although she’s friendly, Allison has a dangerous edge to her. And while Liam has a fiery temper, he’s got a very sweet heart underneath it all. Hopefully you get to learn more about your new friends in the coming days!

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You find yourself in school again the next day. What would you like to do?

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She stands there for a moment, confused by the change. Wasn't she just...?

This is a very odd dream. 

(It has to be a dream, right?)

 ...While she has a moment-

"Hey," she directs at the air, "What's all this about stats anyway?" 

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Some relationships are hard. Sometimes you can ruin them. In order to improve most relationships beyond a certain point, you must increase your stats! You began with a 0 in all stats! There are three stats: Strength, Intelligence, and Charm. They do not relate at all to your real qualities or skills.

If you get any relationship to turn into love, you win! If you ask me, I can tell you how much strength you have, how much intelligence, how much charm, and how well all of your relationships are going!

Your Strength is 10!

Your Intelligence is 0!

Your Charm is 10!

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"...Ok. I guess that's all. Pretty simple!"

This is too coherent for one of her dreams? But why would some super powerful being kidnap her for a weird romance game without the rest of her pack?!? She's not important! 

She's not gonna panic. She's not. 

"How are my relationships doing?" She asks, trying to distract herself. Her voice is a bit high, though. 

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Your relationship with Allison is 3!

Your relationship with Liam is 1!

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"Great, good." Distraction isn't working, is there somewhere around here where she can freak out in private? 

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You can certainly find somewhere private before your next class.

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Great, she'll go there and curl up on a chair or bench or failing that in a corner and try to catch her breath and figure out what she's supposed to do with this realization. 

It might take her some time to get to the latter bit. 

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"Hey. Are you okay?"

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Her head whips up at the voice. 

"...Not. Not really," she says after a moment, voice shaky. "I'm. Not supposed to be here?" 

Has anyone noticed she's missing? They must have, right? How long has it been? She can't tell, time is... weird, here.

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"It's going around. Last thing I knew, I was dying on the floor of an abandoned bank."

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"Dying on the floor of a bank??" 

She pauses.

"...And. Now you're not dying. Did this magic resurrect people?" 

She shakes her head pushing herself up to her feet, "Listen to me, not even- I can't even imagine how freaked out you must be. Are you okay?" 

Having someone else's problems to focus on steadies her a bit. 

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"Oh, honey, I'm fine. Being alive is pretty good. I don't think Boyd has figured it out, though. It looks like only the people who aren't your type are immune to this..."

She gestures at the ceiling dismissively.

"I just hope it's not temporary."

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"Oh, good."

"...This makes wanting to go home to my friends a lot more complicated," she admits. "I don't want you to go back to being dead or dying." 

She looks up at the ceiling, "Any comments, narration?" 

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The purpose of this is to determine who you are most compatible with! None of the people are real, even the ones who think they are!

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She gives Erica a wide-eyed look.

"Did you hear that?" 

She's not sure she wants to believe that. 

For one thing, if they think they are, they are, right? 

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"I heard it. I feel pretty real, but I guess it's your creepy fantasy."

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She makes a face, "Ugh, no." 

"Anyway, they said 'even the ones who think they are'. If you think you're real, you're real." And that still leaves her with a problem. 

"What happens if I... 'win'? What happens to the people here?" She asks the narrator.

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When you win, the simulation will end. If it is very important to you, I can help you learn resurrection.

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"Well, if it wasn't important to me before, it sure as hell is now!" 

She pauses. 

"...I don't think I have the power for something like that, though. Not without doing some... really bad things." 

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Using the power of a darach is not your only option! Using the nemeton, a hellhound, and the blood of a löwenmensch, you can perform resurrections on most recently-deceased people. Additionally, there are also more complicated techniques involving banshees.

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"...A hellhound. And the nemeton? And I don't think I've even heard mention of the third one. I guess I'll have research to do, at home, and while I'm here."

She pulls her gaze away from the ceiling, giving Erica a determined look, "I know we don't really know each other, but I promise, I definitely won't leave you dead. You or anyone else who vanishes with the simulation," she promises. 

She wouldn't leave anyone dead if she could help it. If she can't do that in the real world... well, clearly you can bring people back in simulations. Maybe that could be good enough. 

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"Thanks. Like anyone you've met so far? Or is it less fun to be matchmade when you're not in charge?"

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"The information dumps are pretty weird - do you hear those anywhere or only when you're near me?" She shakes her head, "But I've been getting along with Allison? And I helped Liam... yesterday. It seems like I can only really talk to one person in each of the two time slots, though. I don't know if I might get along better with someone else." 

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"I can hear it all the time. It's sort of awful, in a fun way. It sounds like it's a game. You don't need to go where it wants you to go. Just have fun, and go off the map."

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"Maybe you're right... I'm sort of doing that now, I guess. I don't know if I'm missing one of my 'classes' right now or if that's put on hold until I get to it? Like in a game, like you said."  

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“Can you-“

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What class would you like to attend next?

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“...right. So I guess it’ll let-“

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After a lovely conversation with your new friend, Erica, you realize you really should focus on getting to class.

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"...Pushy."

She shrugs at Erica, "I mean classes seem like the only way to increase my stats? And I should probably do that, if I want to get out of this thing. So... Intelligence, next. Better keep them balanced for now at least." 

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"Makes sense to me. It's good to be well-rounded. Have fun!"

She waves, and heads off.

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"Where do I even go for 'Class'?" She asks the narrator? 

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You may attend gym, class, or lunch!

All three occur at the same time, twice a day.

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"Yes, I was asking where I'm supposed to go for class. And which class." 

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You will simply arrive at class if you select class!

Class is where you go to study things that human schools care about.

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She knows some people who would find this explanation both funny and entirely correct. 

"Alright, I choose class." She steps out into the hallway. Is there anyone around who can help her get to the room where they study things human schools care about?

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Allison is there, suddenly!

"Hey. Do you need help getting to your next class?"

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Surprise Allison! 

"Hi!" She greets, "That would be great, yeah!" 

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After Allison leads you to your next class, you find yourself standing in the doorway. She has already gone inside to sit, leaving you to contemplate who you would like to meet today. There are a number of students inside, most of whom you don't recognize.

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Kira Yukimura, shy but friendly, is a wonderful person if you're looking for a low-stakes interaction- as long as you don't mind a little awkwardness on her part!

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Scott McCall, a local alpha, is quite happy to welcome newcomers to the town.

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Hayden Romero gives you a curious glance. More than most students, her first step on meeting a new person is to size them up.

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More choices, ok. 

local alpha? She hadn't known there was more than one pack in Beacon hills. That sounds like it must be a complicated situation. It also sounds like something she would maybe like to avoid for now? 

A little low-stakes interaction would probably be nice right about now, honestly. She sits by Kira. 

"Hi, I'm Robin, I'm new," she says. 

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"Oh! Hi, I'm Kira! Do you like it so far? I'm kind of new, too."

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"It's been okay overall - everyone has been very nice, but I miss home. Where did you move from?" 

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"We're originally from New York! Not originally originally, I mean, my mom's Japanese and my dad's Korean. I wasn't born in New York either, and my mom actually lived in California when she was younger for a while, so I guess more recently than originally. What about you?"

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"Kettering, Ontario. It's a small city about an hour's drive from Toronto in good traffic. I wouldn't be surprised if you've never heard of it," she adds with a laugh. 

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"No, I haven't. I don't know about Canada, although I really should. It's right next door! You probably know so much more about America than we know about you."

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"I guess? I definitely can't name all the states, or anything - which I guess might be a problem!" She laughs sheepishly, "Hopefully the teachers give me time to get caught up in all the America-specific history and geography." If that's even the sort of thing that will come up in the romance game version of class. 

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"I don't think I can name any of the Canadian provinces. Saskatchewan?"

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"That's one of them, yep! There's ten, and three territories. I can name... uh, New York, Ohio, Tennessee, Texas, Kansas, Virginia... well, more American states than that, anyway, I don't want to just sit here listing them out!" 

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"Sorry! I didn't mean to make this into a competition about geography! I think I know a little more about history because I was always interested in mythology growing up. Modern geography never really made the list of stuff younger Kira wanted to read."

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"Oh no, me neither! I just wasn't even sure how many I knew, and started counting them out because it seemed like an interesting question, but then the list got too long, and-" she shakes her head, "Sorry. Geography isn't really my thing either. What kind of mythology do you like?"

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"I was really into Greek mythology as a kid. Something about how realistic the motivations were, you know? I mean, I like to think people are better than that, but still, it didn't seem all divine and out of reach of us. After that I actually got really interested in Buddhism for a while, which isn't a mythology. Some of it has mythology, I guess, but I think that's insensitive to say about religions that people still believe in. No offense. Not that I'm assuming you're Buddhist, that would be kind of weird to assume since it's not that common in Canada, right?"

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"I'm not sure," she considers, "Probably no more common than it is in the US," she decides. 

"Legends and myths are definitely fun, though. I used to pretend I was a dryad when I was a kid. There was an oak tree in my backyard and I'd climb all over the branches and put the leaves in my hair - it drove my grandparents crazy."

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"I never used props when I pretended to be a fairy, but I did sometimes pretend to be a kappa. My mom didn't like that one as much, since I always got water on the floor."

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"Are they the ones with the water in their heads?" She asks, vaguely remembering reading about them once. 

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"Yeah. I always liked those myths. They have to be polite, even though losing the water on their heads makes it so they can't move. Kind of an easy monster to beat, and polite, too."

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"It's kind of sad, really," she hums, "I kinda feel bad for them, being tricked like that all the time. Even if they are monsters. And mythical." She has vague recollections of them being rapey, too, but can't recall the specifics. It could just be bad press, anyway, if they are real. There's a lot of that. 

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"A lot of myths would be less funny if they were real. I guess it's not nice to laugh at fictional people either."

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"Probably not, no," she agrees with a sigh. "A lot of the stuff that happens in myths was probably really scary for the people it happened to. I mean, I wouldn't want to be a dryad in ancient Greece with all those gods around." 

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Your relationship with Kira has increased!

"The Greeks seemed to like the gods a lot for how bad the myths were. It seems so different from any modern religions. I wonder if people just thought differently about what gods meant to them."

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"I think so," she agrees. "Something about making nature explainable, maybe? If they gave it human-like nature, with understandable desires and hatreds, they felt more in control. You can't appease a storm, but if the storm is controlled by a person, you can try to appease them."

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"I wish we could appease storms. Maybe the Greeks just didn't get their offerings right. Maybe storms want cell phones."

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She giggles, "What would a storm do with a phone?" 

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"Call their families. We already name the big storms, maybe we should start imagining whole families for them. Backstories, things like that."