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there's no more future ahead
just like back then
Permalink Mark Unread

The dungeon felt a little off, even from the beginning. A little... a little fuzzy around the edges, like the spaces where they weren't looking were rearranging themselves just a bit. It was one of those dungeons that rearranged itself at semi-regular intervals, but it still made sense, physically. All of the pieces were being rearranged, but they were still the same.

Until they weren't.

It was right as they were closing in on the core. Another dungeon had sprung up, and this A-rank dungeon had been predictable enough that they decided to let Yun Minseo depart early to prep for looking at that one. It's not clear if it was feeling threatened by the pair of super powerful combat espers closing in on its core, or if it was waiting for the much less obviously threatening sensor to leave, but, well. That was when it went from 'tricky and annoying but doable' to. Whatever the fuck this is.

Walls of iron turn to sludge around them. The ground shifts from stone to mud to something else, something stickier, at their feet, and then drips down the ceiling to attempt to cover them in some sort of horrible tar as their comms suddenly die. A swarm of something with the wings of birds and the heads of dogs and the claws of some kind of velociraptor comes barreling out of the sludge, a great tidal wave of teeth and claws and malice. The sludge around them writhes and turns to something like snakes, each one's body as sharp as knives, twitching and stretching in unexpected directions.

That is not to say that Tae-gun and Hye-jin take this lying down and go, "Oh well, the dungeon isn't what we expected. Time to give up and go home." Obviously, they're not doing that. Tae-gun can keep them above and protected from whatever fresh new bullshit this fucking - sludge dungeon - throws at them, and whatever the fuck this stuff is made of, Hye-jin can actually just melt it away with a truly astonishing amount of fire. They can still win this, still find and destroy the core.

It just means that - well. Here they are. It's started.

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Tae-gun... is a lot less sure that they can actually win this. He's still going to try, of course, but more than the actual stuff the dungeon is directly throwing at them right now, the fact that it chose to change when it did, and that it cut their comms, is...

"Assume the dungeon is pulling its punches and trying to get us to drop our guard," he says as soon as they have some space to breathe. "There's no reason it'd stop at tricking us once. And we need to find the entrance pronto; destroying the core might get us trapped." Smart dungeons suck.

The fact that he never feels more alive than when he is in one is proof that he also does.

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Hye-jin nods. She'd argue if he were calling for a full retreat, but he's not. He wants to know where the exit is before they light the proverbial fuse on this monstrosity, which is just smart.

"Yeah," she agrees. "I do think we're still near the core, though - and that it might be bluffing with how much it's changed. Redoing the entire algorithm that it rearranges itself by sounds too out of bounds for it, just that everything is also now sludge. But obviously let's verify first."

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"This is probably the confluence starting," he says, though he's sure she already knows it; it's just procedure to always lay out your reasoning out loud in these situations because miscommunications cost lives. "I don't want to say anything is too out of bounds. I've had very nasty surprises before.

"...I agree that it's unlikely, though."

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"Agreed that it's the confluence, just. I don't think it's broken into S-rank yet, and... this feels like a bluff to me, if that makes sense? There were too many things at once, without enough solid, concrete gains."

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"You're not wrong." He's probably just anxious. It'll probably be fine. It'll hopefully be fine.

But, well, exit first.

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Indeed! Exit first.

They don't have any landmarks to navigate by, anymore, but they've long worked out a way to systematically use their powers to judge direction and distance. The comms are down, but their computers are not, and so they can calculate the trajectory back to the exit, if the exit were where it would have been before the dungeon turned to sludge, and -

"- Ha!" says Hye-jin, a little smugly.

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...he needs to wipe that smirk off her face.

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Ack, that's backlash, he'll turn that into a laugh that's only a little bit forced. "Point to you."

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Then serious again. "We should step outside to communicate the changes to the team before trying to take it out, but it seems like it should still be doable with just the two of us."

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Nod!

"Yeah. We don't want them sending anyone in after us if we don't need them."

The esper resources are now at a precious premium. Best to work to avoid wasting them.

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So he floats them outside to find—

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—pandaemonium. The support team is is reorganising itself so that 3/4 of it can be send elsewhere because dungeons are spawning everywhere, and from the way some authorities have been called to try to get the crowd of onlookers to safety they may be able to guess that a different dungeon appeared somewhere nearby, one that's probably started spewing monsters. Their comms reconnect and they get confirmation of same, plus official warning that the guilds have agreed that confluence has started.

It's not chaos, though, because they've been preparing for months; rather, it's the business and stress associated with putting a complicated and important plan into motion. And as it's literally only just started, this is just the opening salvo, which is typically followed by a short lull before a gradual but rapid ramp up.

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Tae-gun types a shorthand report and sends it through, then looks at Hye-jin to check whether there's anything more she wants to do outside before they go back in.

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Nope, she's good. Her own brief report has been sent, and they're free to head back inside and try to wrap this up quickly.

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If less quickly than they otherwise would. This probably merits them going a bit more all-out than they'd planned to, though, especially given that the rest of today's schedule is definitely all thrown to hell.

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Yeah. Though, for the record, they're still following the habit of burning her backlash before his when they can; with his backlog whatever she manages to acrue will disappear without too much trouble, and take out more of his in so doing. As long as it doesn't kill her, anyway.

But they're not going to even get close to that possibility.

She was totally right, though, about being able to win. They do still take out the core. No S-rank sludge dungeon for the next confluence, she's sure all of the espers in the world are heartbroken.

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Once they're properly out, the remaining crew is just a couple of people—now is not the time to pretend their star players need any more support than they actually do—and their schedule has been cleared for the day. Quasar will also be holding an all-hands in about three hours, when every on-duty esper who isn't taking care of any emergencies is projected to be done with their current dungeons. Barring said emergencies, attendance is mandatory; all Korean guilds are doing the same thing, but staggered, so that they can all cover for each other.

...and, well, Hye-jin's attendance isn't mandatory, given her relationship with the guild, but it's... strongly advised. Otherwise, her only way to stay on the loop will be the semi-public comms all espers in the country have access to. Which aren't nothing! But the Korean esper scene is very guild-reliant, so.

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Yeah, yeah, she'll show up, she's not going to be screwing over herself and Korea with her petty pride. And she's less mad at Quasar itself, and more mad at the guild president. Anyway, lives are on the line, of course she's showing up, people die (or get snatched away into dungeons forever) if she doesn't do her job well enough.

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Before then, though:

If you need to hold my hand outside of the split silo, I'm fine with it. Feel free to grab it if you need to, okay?
Confluences are bad and all.

This is of course to her partner.
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I should be fine.

He's handled much, much worse without a partner at all. This really doesn't even compare.

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Yeah. She knows. But... still, she doesn't want him to suffer.

Yeah. But pre-negotiated consent and all.
Bad idea for us to get in an emergency and for you to not think of options that are there.
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Fair enough.

Thank you.

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You're welcome.

And she can just leave it at that until it's time for all hands on deck. Whee.
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Not everyone is attending in-person, and even the people who are are spread between a handful of auditoriums with the address being made virtually, but Lee Tae-gun is of course invited to be in the main auditorium, where he can be reassuringly there for everyone.

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"Good afternoon, everyone! I don't want to take up too much of your time. I know this will be some of you guys' first confluence, though, so I will go over the basics, and then cover some operational and logistical concerns.

"Confluences happen about two to three times a decade, and just like no one really understands where dungeons come from or why they happen, no one understands why confluences happen either. The short version is that they are a period lasting between one and six months during which the frequency and power of the dungeons that crop up all over the world reaches critical levels. A few of the big, named S-rank dungeons that no one's been able to seal yet only appear during confluences, while others always appear during confluences even if they also appear at other times. Additionally, several new dungeons appear to, and please don't read too much into this phrasing, opportunistically make use of the time when we're all busy dealing with their bigger siblings to become bigger, themselves.

"I don't want to overstate the danger, but I don't want to understate it either. We've managed to create some very good systems to deal with confluences when they happen, but they are taxing our system and they are very difficult to deal with. Both espers and non-espers will be spread thin, and everyone's workload will be necessarily increased. During confluences, you should consider every other esper your ally, and forget about guilds or what-have-you. We're all working together, here, for the good of Korea and the world, and cross-organisational teams will be the rule rather than the exception. You'll be seeing many new faces and we'll be expecting you all to be showing your best faces. Misunderstandings are always risky, but when working with people you've never worked with before they can be deadly. Be liberal in what you accept, and conservative in what you emit, to copy a certain saying. Everyone will be extremely stressed out, backlash levels will be much higher on average, and exhaustion and frayed tempers are to be expected.

"Your comms system has numerous functionalities that will be invaluable. It's usually not worth the bandwidth cost, but for the duration of confluences, you will all have access to live maps of dungeons all over the world. It's usually best for people to stay local, of course, for familiarity and specialisation reasons, but any espers that have more niche or specific powers may find themselves being called much farther afield than they are used to.

"You all have access to information packets elaborating on all of this, and to anyone doing their very first confluence, I urge you to read it all in detail. I'm going to go over some of the most important points, here, though, to make sure we're all on the same page..."

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Hye-jin would kind of rather read about it than listen to this person tell her mostly stuff she already knows, but. She'll be good. No commscreen just yet, look at how professional and reassuring she is.

Anyway, this is all stuff she knows already. By her estimation she's more likely to be on call than her last confluence. She was fairly new at it, then, and working under with a partner that was ultimately dragging her down. Now she's been at this for years, and displaying competence left and right, and is partnered with Lee Tae-gun. As two highly powered combat specialists that are partnered to each other, they're going to be very busy, and probably together on most of their assignments.

Not as busy as the poor sensors (and her heart aches a little for Yun Minseo in particular, sense deprivation!) will be, but. They'll also be the ones directly risking their lives more. Sensors are generally worked very hard, but also guarded like the irreplaceable treasures they are.

Combat espers? Eh. Good luck, we'll give you the best we can, try not to die.

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Tae-gun's presence really is very much for show, there, anyway, but it's also meant to rally people together and help them feel a bit less scared and uncertain, especially when they might not run into each other for a while due to the hecticness. In any event, he will be Confident and Reassuring while in public.

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It's not that long an all-hands, just half an hour all told, and then people are dispatched to their missions with updated schedules.

Tae-gun gets a text personally from the guild president, though:

I'm going to do my best to get Lucid out of your hair like usual but...

this is exactly the kind of chaotic situation that can give someone openings they wouldn't otherwise have

Be careful, Tae-gun

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Aaaaand there goes his mood.

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...?

She notices his mood drop, and gives him an inquisitive look.

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Rather than say anything he just turns his commscreen so she can read it. It's not that he didn't think about this exactly, but...

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She nods, then types out a message to him.

If anything in that vein happens I will teleport you out ASAP
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Argh.

That's... probably for the best.

Tae-gun's last confluence was with him. They didn't work the same dungeons, but...

...and it happened before everything went bad, too, which makes those memories very bittersweet. And now Tae-gun's spent years hoping to never run into him again, but this confluence is definitely one of the most likely situations for them to run into each other and, and, and...

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Fuck. Tae-gun really, really wishes his feelings were simpler. He really, really wishes he could uncomplicatedly claim that he doesn't want to run into him. But instead that claim is very complicated, and has thorns, and sticky edges, and...

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"It seems like only one S-rank's popped up so far, in Indonesia, and there's already a team onsite," he says aloud, closing the chat app and opening the world map to share it with Hye-jin. "We've got standing guidelines that we should not engage any A-ranks that mess with comms because we might need to be pulled from them to get any surprise S-ranks that pop up." He opens their proposed schedules for the next twenty-four hours side-by-side. One schedule has them covering a couple of big dungeons together, another has them soloing a series of smaller opportunistic dungeons and meeting up for guiding. Last confluence he went for something like the latter because he and Ka- because he and his partner didn't really do dungeons together, but it's different now.

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Talking about work always makes him feel better. Fortunately, talking about work makes her feel better, too! What good partners they make. She is so supportive of switching to tactics talk.

"I lean staying together, we magnify each other enough that it's worth the breadth cost for the extra power. We are up against the big ones. But I don't need to be glued to your side if it'd be inefficient, just. We fill the same esper niche."

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It's kind of funny, actually, that these schedules are both still lighter than they would be on the regular, just to leave as many openings as they can for the inevitable S-ranks that are going to appear at unpredictable intervals.

"That sounds good to me, too," he says, pressing "Accept" on the proposed schedule with Hye-jin. "Let's go over the next dungeon and then... Hm. There are a few named S-ranks that are likely to appear and, if they do, are likely to need us. We should probably go over those, too, before that happens." They have an hour and a half before their only assignment for the evening, and then a break for sleeping.

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Yeah, this seemingly empty schedule is full of lies and she knows it.

She nods. "Definitely. You okay for holding hands while we talk tactics? We are going to want to make a habit of cutting back on as much backlash as possible." ... Including, well. Um. This next part should be in message, actually.

I should mention I am also comfortable combining backlash and sleep times.
If you are, anyway
My backlash basically just knocks me out anyway, so.
Another option if you want it.
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He reads the messages and then... tilts his head at her. But replies in messages, too.

Yes, that seems plausibly called-for, here.

Both things, that is.

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Nodnodnod.

She hears his unspoken question. She supposes she should probably answer it.

look it felt weird to ask you 'hey do you want to sleep together' so I needed text for it.
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Why... would it be...

...wait.

Did you mean something other than going to sleep in our split silo holding hands?

Because he might spontaneously combust if she says yes.

(And also have a lot of trouble refusing it.)

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That option is also fine!
But, um.
Do you think we could reliably keep our hands touching in the split silo while sleeping?
Without literally tying our hands together or something
Which I don't see how we'd manage, considering.
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Ah.

Yyyyyep, spontaneously combusting.

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Yep. Yep yep yep.

"Anyway we don't have to go there I'm just stating my comfort levels in advance because pre-negotiated consent!" she blurts in a rush, out loud. Fortunately they're not in public anymore, or, well, in front of Quasar anymore; she'd be making a fool out of both of them.

Why is she so embarrassed about literally just sleeping together? Well that's easy, because she has by now figured out a lot about his backlash, and has notions. Clearly there is NO REASON AT ALL, so she should STOP BEING EMBARRASSED.

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"I... think I would prefer not, then," he manages to say with his actual mouth, past both the hurdle of "he is getting horny thinking about it" and the hurdle of "whenever he thinks about being in bed with someone it's Kan- him and if Tae-gun looks too closely at that he's going to have a panic attack".

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Nodnodnodnodnod!

"Totally fine! Sounds good! Sorry to bother you with it!"

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"It's fine." Here's the tac map for the dungeon, how about.

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Sounds good to her! Tactical map! Talking about likely S-rank dungeons they might be called in for! Ahahahahahahaha she didn't do anything embarrassing at all, hush, it's fine.


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The next few days are an extremely unpleasant and stressful combination of dungeons and down time. The breaks between dungeons are too long, and the dungeons themselves are sufficiently challenging that they're both straining with backlash after every one of them. And it really doesn't help that Tae-gun... can't do better than handholding. He's sorry, but he just... can't. They can figure out a sleeping handholding solution but he can't do better than that. 

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And then, four days after the confluence starts, Tae-gun and Hye-jin get summoned for an emergency S-rank dungeon in Mexico. One of the named ones, which Tae-gun told Hye-jin about. 

It's called Volcanic Range.

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Tanking her backlash with only handholding is kind of awful, but she does have a silo that's specifically outfitted to make sure she won't die from it, so. Just the aches and pains in her joints and uncomfortable stiffness. And the headaches. And the low core body temperature that she needs to constantly keep bringing up what feels like every five minutes. It's not as bad as what Tae-gun suffered for the past five years, and her backlash is better than most on the 'able to be countered' front. She will bear this discomfort with grace and dignity and absolutely no puppy eyes at Tae-gun. (Even though she now really misses snuggles.) Sleep handholding is fine. She is fine.

Volcanic Range is... not one of the S-rank dungeons she's likely to be very useful in. It's in the name, see. A fire esper is not going to be great at burning something that is already molten rock. She knows why she's here, and it's to be Tae-gun's partner. Which stings more than it should, really, because logically speaking the fact that she's allowed to go in at all is a serious compliment to her abilities and competence, and her major goal is absolutely to save as many lives as possible, not assuage her ego, but. ... It still stings. Not that she's going to display this complicated feeling where literally anyone can see. She is perfectly professional and just a teensy bit tired and backlashed. It's fine. She's fine.

(This is still ultimately better than waiting for the confluence to start, even if this is more actively uncomfortable.)

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By now Tae-gun knows her well enough, though, that even without her showing it he... he gets it. There are many ways in which the two of them are similar, and in her shoes he'd be feeling wretched to be there only to be some other esper's arm candy. He can squeeze her hands (they've taken to handholding as much as they can, even outside their silo, provided there aren't cameras directly pointed at them) and offer her as reassuring a smile as he can.

"Ready?" he asks, commscreen open in front of him with the teleport destination marked on the map. They're about to be stared at by international media, which Tae-gun is already used to but Hye-jin is not—well, at least not this degree of international, Korea and Japan are next-door neighbours but Mexico is very much not—so he wants to make sure she's prepared for it.

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"Ready," she says, giving his hands a squeeze in return, then releasing them. Mostly on his account; she's of the opinion that if anyone reads into esper handholding that's their problem.

Hye-jin actually suspects she's going to like international media more than either the Korean or Japanese media, on account of how nobody here is aware that she speaks some English. In order to ask her any questions they'd have to ask her in a language most people on this continent don't speak! That doesn't mean people won't drag translators in to try it, but the barrier of entry is higher. Instead they'll just be judging her by her looks and the way she carries herself, and: she's used to that, really.

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On the bright side, amongst the suite of bullshit tech espers have access to is incredibly good simultaneous translation, so that they can communicate across language barriers like the one they're about to face. Of course, with languages whose structure is as different from each other as Spanish and English are from Korean and Japanese, "simultaneous" is relative, and there's still always some delay and awkwardness. Thankfully, they're all professionals, and short, to-the-point, unambiguous communication is a skill they've all had drilled in.

Also, Tae-gun himself goes abroad often enough that people know him and know he speaks perfect English. Hye-jin is about to be scrutinised.

He's sorry.

vworp

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Dungeons that get more powerful and dangerous also get bigger portals, for some reason. For a named dungeon like Volcanic Range, the diameter is about three times Tae-gun's height, and it's floating five meters above a large intersection in Mexico City. A very wide area around it has been cleared and cordoned off, and there are six separate canopy tents and a grand total of fifteen support staff plus a medical team of ten.

Tae-gun and Hye-jin will be part of a team of five esper pairs, and out of the other four, two are already there.

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Hye-jin will give them a courteous and excessively Japanese bow and otherwise attempt to leave it at that. Talking is how the media gets you. She will avoid doing that outside of the dungeon if possible, thanks.

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The other espers disagree. One, in particular, a Mexican woman with pure white hair and golden irises, walks confidently towards Tae-gun. "Mr. Lee, good to see you again," she says in English, offering him a hand to shake.

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"Likewise, Ms. Rodriguez," he replies in the same language, shaking her hand firmly. He then turns to look at Hye-jin and switches back to Korean. "Ana Marta Rodriguez is a Mexican S-rank esper with telekinesis powers. She has a lot of experience and working with her has always been a pleasure." Then to Rodriguez: "This is my partner, Kim Hye-jin. She is an A-rank esper with fire powers, and one of the most competent people I have ever met."

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She has her translator up and, after a couple of seconds for it to finish rendering the Spanish translation of those sentences, says, "It is an honour to meet you, Ms. Kim." She extends her hand to shake, too.

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Haaaaandshaaaaakes, she hates them.

She will nonetheless participate in this dreaded ritual. "The honor is mine."

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They're... actually pretty compatible? Not, like, wildly so, but above-average for sure.

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"Are you going to be leading our group, Ms. Rodriguez?"

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"I will, yes. The remaining members of our group should be arriving shortly, and then we'll brief." Flash of light, another pair teleporting in. "And we're almost all here. Excuse me," she says, walking over to the new arrivals to greet them.

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Tae-gun always finds it really goddamn strange how Westerners call him by his family name. He just can't get used to it, no matter how many times it happens.

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... huh. Weird to meet someone she's compatible with out here in the proverbial wild. With her extremely obvious and publicly known backlash, she's accustomed to only relying on arranged (potential) partnerships.

Anyway, not important. She will be paying attention to the briefing, and attempt to be any comforting to Tae-gun with her presence. (She can tell he doesn't like the social rules changing on him. She'd hold his hand about it, but there are now cameras.)

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And once the last pair arrives a couple of minutes later, Rodriguez gathers them all up to introduce them all to each other (including their respective ranks and powers, and of course they're all As and Ss here) and then start the briefing.

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Volcanic Range is not one of the oldest dungeons on record, but in the years it's been around for it's gotten quite a fearsome reputation—and, really, the fearsomeness to back it, too. It's one of the somewhat rare dungeons that doesn't even try to kidnap people at all, opting instead to send out monsters to find people and bake them alive. And of course, people under these monsters' ministrations take a lot longer to die than they would if they were exposed to these amounts of heat from any other sources, as dungeons always try to keep their victims alive for as long as possible. For this dungeon in particular, the survival rates of people who escape the monsters is abysmal, since once outside their zone of influence the tissue damage will often be sufficient to be lethal, so it is paramount to not let monsters escape at all.

The inside of the dungeon is open air: there is a sky, and an expansive horizon. But the place is blazingly hot, decorated by crisscrossing rivers of lava, burning forests, and active volcanoes. The sky is perpetually a deep dark red that reflects the fires, and burnt and burning ashes fly in the scorching wind. What's more, the dungeon is old enough that it has in fact expanded to cover a lot of its horizon, and at least some of the forests and volcanoes visible in the horizon are actually real and visitable. The terrain is rocky, dry, and uneven, with the mirages helping it conceal numerous tripping hazards lying in wait to get you to fall on your face and suffer a third-degree burn or worse.

If that were all it was, though, it would not be an S-rank, even with some reasonably scary monsters.

First, it kills comms and electronics. They're all advised to just leave phones and other gadgets behind, because they just won't be useful in there. They'll need to navigate using their regular senses, no tech assistance available. Not just that, but sensors have a range limit enforced upon them, when they're not entirely noped by the dungeon, so they can't even compile a very good map of the dungeon in any way other than literally going out and seeing.

Second, you can't stay anywhere for too long, as the rock that makes up the ground will literally start animating itself into golems anywhere there's anyone, and the place's got lava just below the surface everywhere (and if that's not realistic: fuck you, the dungeon does not care about realism, it wants you to burn) so that continually destabilises the terrain. That also means that they can't do the normal thing of having a medical team stationed inside right next to the portal that they can do with other dungeons as they would probably all be killed and the entrance area would be made impassable.

Third, the place is huge. That's it, that's the third item, it's just had so long to grow and searching it for the core is really difficult.

Fourth, there are dragons, some larger than mammoths, all with scales tougher than steel and capable of breathing fire that melts rock.

Fifth, every monster it produces explodes on death, Balrog style. The dragons' explosions are enormous, while the golems' get larger depending on how long it's been since they spawned (so you want to kill them quickly) (and so, of course, if a golem does break past the dungeon portal that is an emergency as killing it in an area with civilians will cause unacceptable levels of collateral damage).

And finally, sixth, like many other S-rank dungeons it produces numerous identical decoy "cores" that all monsters will protect with their lives and which, if destroyed don't do anything. ...well, besides exploding.

In summary, no one actually has any ideas for how to permanently close this dungeon. Whenever it appears they try to systematically explore it, get attacked by monsters, occasionally find a core-alike, draw a specialist sensor in to verify whether it's the real core, it never is, they try destroying it anyway, it explodes, the dungeon remains. So the best they can do, really, is keep the monsters at bay until the dungeon decides to leave. Typically, this is done by sending a team in, staying in for two to six hours, and then being replaced by a new team later, rinse and repeat.

This is not to say, of course, that they're not going to be trying. Two of the five pairs—Tae-gun and Hye-jin being one, Rodriguez and her partner Montenegro being the other—have long-range exploration as their duty. They'll be going in opposite directions and trying to find something, anything that might prove to be the real core. They're chosen for their extreme mobility, of course, with Rodriguez being able to fly herself and her partner using her telekinesis and Tae-gun being able to do the same with his ice constructs, but now that Tae-gun has a partner who can help with his backlash he is also a damage-dealing powerhouse himself, which will allow him a lot more flexibility in his job.

High damage-dealing, mobility, and defensive capabilities: you need at least two out of those three to be of meaningful use, here. Tae-gun, with Hye-jin, now has all three. Hye-jin has two.

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The one she's missing is the defensive capabilities, but she's somewhat more fireproof than other comparable espers, even when her actual immunity is to her own fire. So, uh. Two and a half? Two and one quarter? She will be treating it as nonexistent regardless, but it's still better than most people get. She is, objectively speaking, extremely fortunate.

At least she has something to do; her role here (besides being arm candy) is going to be navigator for their duo. Tae-gun, as the one with an esper power that actually counters this place, and furthermore also primarily responsible for transporting them, will be kind of too busy to stop and do any calculations to make sure they're actually checking a new area that hasn't already been covered by another shift. Electronics don't work, ordinary paper doesn't survive the ambient heat, but guess what? Certain kinds of paper made from dungeon materials can handle this. Guess who put a lot of resources and research into trying to counter this dungeon? That's right, anyone with any sense, because the Volcanic Range sucks and it could show up anywhere! So she's got a compass, an extremely fire resistant pen, graph (dungeon) paper, what's already been partially mapped by other teams, and hopefully enough quick and dirty cartography training to not completely bungle their scouting duties. Her work is not only to get things right, but also check everyone else's work in the search pattern they're working from, and waste as little of the sensor's time as possible on map cleanup and verification that they're exploring new ground.

Anyway. Ready as she'll ever be. She actually feels better about this now that she's here and she has a definite and useful job.

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They're not the first group in, so even though dungeons get stronger every time they appear, there probably won't be any surprises. That's just a "probably", though; these dungeons are smart, and not beyond lulling people with a false sense of security by hiding their aces in their sleeves. This isn't theoretical, either, every confluence there are multiple dungeons that do this exact thing, so they really should not let their guard down.

That said... in they go, the esper with the overpowered shield powers going first to survive any potential ambushes waiting for them.

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Hye-jin and Tae-gun don't wait to go in before being on his ice hoverboards, and as soon as they're through Tae-gun immediately takes to the air, looking up to make sure there aren't any dragons overhead waiting for them to get too busy with whatever might've been waiting on the ground.

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That was all, as expected, an excess of zeal; the area surrounding the portal is clear of monsters.

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Good. Okay; brief pause for everyone to verify the available landmarks and get an accurate heading, and then they're off. Tae-gun is entirely welcome to do his usual cool guy surfing on ice hoverboards, but Hye-jin will be sitting and furthermore demands a desk. A tiny ice desk. She keeps an arm looped around his ankle, carefully entwined between trousers and socks, but with enough skin contact to be equivalent to handholding. It's, uh, not her favorite position, and the media is absolutely going to have opinions about the way this looks, but they both need their hands free, and skin contact is kind of important. So. This is what they're doing, even if she kind of does look like the little arm candy nerd hanging on the back of Tae-gun's somewhat literal ice coattails. It's fine. She has a job, and that's what matters.

She will of course also be keeping an eye out and be available for support, but, like. It's fire versus lava. She doesn't expect to be able to do as much as he will. His turn to do the brunt of the work and for her to cover his gaps! Oh how the tables have turned.

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They, like, discussed this in advance, so it's not fair to say it was a surprise, and objectively speaking it's not even really that much skin contact. However, there's just something about her lifting his trousers up to touch him that just feels... it feels...

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It's fine. He's fine. He's done entire dungeons with an erection before. He's not unused to it. He's even done it around her before—arguably, that was one of his first experiences of running a dungeon with her. And the guideline of "go see a doctor if your erection lasts longer than four hours" doesn't apply to him anyway; if he did that, he just wouldn't ever leave the hospital, and he is demonstrably fine.

It's fine.

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No, genuinely, he is fine, and outside the electrical shock caused in the immediate aftermath of the touch, going directly from his ankle to his nether regions, he can focus perfectly confidently. Once they're properly inside and clear that there's no immediate danger he gives Rodriguez and Montenegro a nod, and then off they go to their designated exploration area.

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The opening teams used a spiral search pattern to try and fortify the portal as much as possible. Of course, after a large enough spiral, that became inefficient, so by now the teams have transitioned to a quadrant based line search, centered on the exit portal. In order to avoid being in any one place for too long, or teams accidentally setting off defenses that will hit other teams, the 'active' quadrants are diagonal to each other. Theirs is south-east, Rodriguez and Montenegro have north-west. Well, there's not really a north or a south in here, magnet compasses also don't work (yes, someone checked, like a decade ago) but they have chosen an arbitrary volcano to treat as their 'north' to work from. By the time they're done, the quadrant system will have been transitioned to octants, what with how the space to search is getting larger the further they get from the portal, but that is only Hye-jin's problem in the sense that she's a consummate professional and wants to leave good data for the next team to work on.

Which is all to say that Hye-jin has kind of gotten into this? She's, well, this is a bit too important and high stakes to be glossed as 'having fun,' but. This is a fulfilling job!

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Tae-gun's gotta say, his half of the job is also pretty fulfilling. Like, look, when you're really good at something, it feels great to do that something a lot and well, and you know what Tae-gun is really good at? That's right, it's summoning icy wrath to skewer evil monsters with!

He will of course not be going melee, here, but he's constantly surrounded by several ice blades of varying sizes swirling in irregular patterns, and while they occasionally shoot out in the direction of foes before returning to him they're mostly a defensive threat in case anything decides that getting close is a good idea. The threats this won't work on are the dragons, but those are fewer and farther between than the fire razorbeaks that are getting thoroughly trounced at their own game. The other kind of threat he has to deal with occasionally is the golems throwing rocks or balls of magma at him, but it's easy enough to deflect those, especially when he can go more ham on it than he normally would've, courtesy of Hye-jin's presence. 

And then there's going on the offensive, because they do actually need to destroy the monsters even while searching for the core; otherwise, they'll escape, and that's a disaster. For that he has ice pillars and spears, precisely targeted nearly unbreakable ice needles at joints and pressure points to disrupt the structure of the constructs as they form, and on occasion dropping a humongous ice boulder on a pack.

It's really satisfying, dropping a humongous ice boulder on a pack.

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She likes seeing him in his element. It makes him, well, the closest he gets to happy, and they make a good team, even when she is sidelined. Things go as well as can be expected for an S-rank dungeon, which is to say they're untouched, but Tae-gun's been taking on a Hell of a lot of backlash. He can handle these numbers, but he's really not specialized for it; that's more her job, and he's having to work to make up the difference. The absence is stark. He's doing fine, because he's himself, obviously, but Hye-jin can feel the way his backlash is building, and she doesn't like it. This really isn't efficient, and the confluence is a marathon more than a sprint. Yes, they can handle this dungeon okay, but what about the next one? Unacceptable with how they're only taking care of backlash with handholding. Something needs to change.

When it is reasonably safe and out of the way, she gives him a heads up and then assists in mopping up a pack of golems on the ground. The backbone of them had been crushed by an exploding ice boulder; she's just going to see how well she can clean up the dregs.

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It.... goes better than she would have expected. The joints that she reached for to overheat flare bright white instead of the dull orange-red they were before, then... darken to black. The golem in question cracks and then falls to pieces, inert.

"... wait, what?" she says, blinking at this.

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He stops the flying midair, just hovering there for a few seconds. He doesn't say "Wait, what?" because she just did but. 

Wait, what?

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Yeah, seriously, what the fuck, was that some kind of fluke?

She reaches out to experiment with less caution - what happens if she burns more of them, do they all do that?

... They do. She has to push a bit, and it's easier at the joints than the center, but the same phenomenon occurs. They flare bright, then... die. Like fuel being burned through, not like superheated rock that's being heated up more. She's melted rock before, and this feels different - this is more like she's burning through gasoline, or maybe some sort of liquid coal. Something that keeps itself hot, and which probably ignites with oxygen, which neatly explains why everything her explodes, doesn't it. The monsters lose cohesion, more of their insides ignite, the whole thing goes boom.

Why do firebreaks work? Well, because they starve the fire of fuel to burn. Hye-jin's fire doesn't operate via fuel consumption; this is the same reason she can incinerate paperwork without leaving ash or setting off smoke detectors. She can burn through its fuel before it can. And then without fuel, it - well, okay, it probably should take longer to go black, but apparently the fragile magical something-or-other is disrupted, which means actually, in this case, fire is super effective against lava.

"I think it's -" she begins, but she's interrupted.

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Because Tae-gun has to suddenly swerve to dodge a dragon that comes out of the ground directly under them to try to take a bite off them.

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...a dragon that literally breaks through the literal ground to come after them what the actual fuck.

See, this? This? This kinda shit? This is what he means when he says that these fucking S-ranks keep stuff in reserve until they lower their guard. Dragons swimming in underground lava was not a thing that was meant to happen! What the fuck!!!!!

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But wait! There's more!

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What fresh hell is about to be inflicted on them for their sins, pray tell. Not that Tae-gun is going to stay still to find out, mind, but "his partner just discovered a way to kill the monsters without them self-detonating at the end" sounds like exactly the kind of thing that might, perhaps, piss a dungeon off.

"Kill them," he says, without specifying who the "them" are. He's sure his brain will have enough time to process that after he's done acting on full-automatic reflex mode.

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The dragon that came from underground was relatively undersized, as they go. Only about as big as a deer.

The three in the horizon? Markedly above average.

Also there's a volcano erupting. The one that's closest to them. So that's nice.

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"Yep!" agrees Hye-jin, a little faintly. "Burning the lava too, to prevent more surprises."

She gets to killing the closest dragon as quickly as possible! The others are out of her comfortable range, but, uh, she'll get them as soon as they come close, and lava first. No more dragons out of the ground, please, fuck that, actually!!!

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Now it's Tae-gun's turn to know what it feels like to have a partner rapidly racketing backlash debt—

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(by literally outburning a volcano-themed dungeon)

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—shut UP libido no one asked you.

What else? What've they got?

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Dragons are tough! The fire inside this relatively tiny dragon is fighting her!

...she's still winning!

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It's literally the backlash but could his dick please go down. Please.

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From a distance, they can see that the other teams are being similarly harassed, though there's a distinct flavour to the harassment that it's trying to block Tae-gun and Hye-jin off from escaping or getting reinforcements. And the three dragons are about to be upon them, being able to fly as fast as Tae-gun himself is.

Nothing more comes out of the underground lava, nor of the hole leftover by the dragon Hye-jin's just killed, but the ground is starting to very angrily form into more and bigger golems.

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The next closest dragon dies. The little one was instructive, she understands how to take them out more efficiently now. Then - uh -

- they're about to be overwhelmed -

"... Turn us around, I'm going to blast us to go faster," she says, because she's nicely situated in this ice hoverboard, there's no reason not to capitalize on that to turn it into an ice rocket.

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"—understood," and then yep it's time to fly—

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Several things happen in quick succession.

One is that the ground hurls three boulders in Tae-gun's direction. Not their direction; Tae-gun's specifically.

The second is that geysers of lava erupt right next to them substantially limiting Tae-gun's choices of where to fly to.

The third is that the ground itself forms into a golem shaped like a dragon's head and aims for Hye-jin.

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Lee Tae-gun has amazing reflexes. He can escape this unscathed, on his own.

...he can't escape unscathed with Hye-jin.

Lee Tae-gun has amazing reflexes, and he turns on his self-enhancement powers a fraction of a second before he fails to dodge the third boulder and is hit by it square in the chest and knocked clean off his hoverboard.

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Hye-jin could maybe have dodged this if she were prepared for it, but between blasting everything within range, lava beneath the ground and golems atop and the fucking geysers popping up and trying to calculate escape trajectories they could take to make it to some assistance, and literally sitting down half strapped into the ice hoverboard, well. Both her ability to grasp the need to dodge, and her dodging options, are rather limited.

She is summarily eaten by the dragon's head.

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The dragon golem's head sinks back into the ground faster than Tae-gun's descent speed, swallowing her with it.

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No.

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No.

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No.

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He doesn't have Hye-jin to protect anymore. Only himself. And the enemy is just two measly dragons each the size of a building, several golems that will explode upon death, and lava geysers.

He can take them.

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He summons an icicle as tall as he is directly in front of himself and hugs it so that he can use it to redirect his momentum from vertical to horizontal, aiming directly at the closest dragon's head.

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It opens its mouth to unleash inferno on him—

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He lets go of the icicle so that it continues along its trajectory while a second one appears to push him down away from the fire and then a third one to become his new hoverboard.

While dragon #1 is still spitting fire at the projectile that was coming at its head, Tae-gun summons an ice spear directly under and a flat ice disc directly above dragon #2, then uses the latter to press it into the former. He makes both of those things happen much more quickly than the dragon can maneuver.

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As may have been his intention, the weight and speed of the ice disc mean that the dragon dies just as it gets close enough to the ground that its explosion also triggers a chain reaction of explosions of all the golems on the ground.

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(This is not a survivable rate of backlash accumulation, says a part of his brain. Shut up, says the rest of his brain.)

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This has happened far, far too fast for dragon #1 to have any time to react, and Tae-gun by himself is fast and manoeuvrable enough that he can dodge the geysers and escape the explosion at the same time as he brings the two swords he's just summoned directly in contact with its neck.

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It's cut clean through.

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Yeah. He knows.

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It's really a very very short battle, once Tae-gun has decided that he no longer cares how much backlash debt he's willing to rack up for it. That's usually how it goes, with very powerful espers. Ask and ye shall receive, so long as you're willing to pay the price.

The crater left by the compounding explosionsis quickly being filled with lava, and there's no sign of Hye-jin, with the rock that had temporarily come alive to swallow her inert already.

The sky is starting to become black with the ash of the volcanic explosion, and fire is starting to rain and flow down, faster than it oughts by right to.

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Tae-gun... is not sure why he just did that.

Hye-jin isn't immune to fire that she didn't produce, herself. She is most certainly not immune to lava. She is not immune to being eaten by a dragon golem and then swallowed into the earth.

He just got a lot of backlash. An amount of backlash that might, actually, kill him. It will at least take him out of commission for the remaining duration of this confluence.

He is...

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...angry.

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So, there are some nuances about her own powers that Hye-jin hasn't had the opportunity to test.

See, she's not immune to her own fire. Or, she's not any more immune to her own fire than she is to regular fire. She's just as resistant to either, which is ultimately a bit above the average A-rank esper. But with her backlash comes hypothermia, and with hypothermia comes a loss of feeling. When using her own fire, she's numb enough that she really doesn't feel it. And then she checks after, and her clothes are various flavors of wrecked, but she herself is fine. With ordinary fire, she doesn't have this luxury, and accordingly feels pain. But the source changes absolutely nothing; it hurts her the same either way, it's just a matter of feeling it or not.

Esper powers are eclectic and often more based on aesthetics than sense. It doesn't logically follow, that Lee Tae-gun's powers of summoning ice come with letting him reinforce himself. Those are very different things. But really, it's actually the other way around, and looking at his backlash provides a clue at what the underlying core concept is. He is the image of the ice king, always in perfect control, never wavering, always solid, and always cold. Impenetrable and untouchable. This is why he can reinforce himself; he is in perfect control of himself, and he declines to be injured. Of course, no sane person would try to bet their life on this kind of crazy and unreliable half-logic. It's the sort of thing that an esper finds out when it's tested, when they try to push their powers at themselves.

Like Lee Tae-gun is a statue of ice, Kim Hye-jin is an unsmotherable flame. Which is to say: with her bullshit, nonsensical combustion powers, she also has some bullshit nonsensical regeneration to go with it.

Tae-gun might notice that there's still something pulling at his backlash. It wouldn't, if she weren't rapidly accumulating backlash at a speed that might make his blush, and it definitely wouldn't if she were dead.

She's not dead.

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Wait, what?

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where

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Down.

Beneath the crust of earth, in the lava below.

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There's really only one possible proportionate response here. 

He hugs another icicle and shoots into the lava like a missile.

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Navigating by the subtle pull that's tugging away at his backlash seems like it'd be tricky, especially without visibility. But to someone who is dancing with death as closely as Lee Tae-gun is at this moment, the feeling of easing at his backlash is in many ways the only thing that matters.

He eventually breaks through an obsidian barrier, into what was once the inside of one of those lava-swimming dragons.

There isn't any light, but he can still feel the woman on the ground.

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Well lava glows and she's, she's still alive, she must be, if she's not he's taking this entire dungeon down, but he's, he can feel her, please, "Hye-jin?"

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"Mmmnhh?" she whimpers, shifting a little to look at him.

The lava certainly glows, but not for long. It brightens white, showing the awful burns along her body, before dimming back to darkness as his partner snuffs out its light.

"Hi Tae-gun," she then mumbles.

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"...how are you alive," he breathes, the same question she's asked him so, so many times, walking over to her and falling to his knees before her. He wants to, wants to touch her, but he can't see and, and those burns looked really bad and, and.

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"Iunno."

There's a flicker of orange to light up the dark - this time created by Hye-jin, and he has long enough to see that her burns seem to be shrinking - and then she's in his arms.

Her clothes did not survive the swim in the lava.

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Yeah, neither did his. Neither did his and, and he really, really wishes his backlash were different, because he is still hard. He is still hard, and his skin is extremely sensitive, and this is the first time they've had so much skin contact, and he's just gotten more concentrated acute backlash than he's ever done before, and so despite how absolutely wretchedly disrespectful and incongruous it is as soon as she hugs him his body spasms and he comes.

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That's fine, Hye-jin's just going to cling to him for a while, thanks. He can do whatever he wants.

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He sucks. He sucks he sucks he sucks. He's awful. He hates himself. Hates hates hates. Hates himself, hates his backlash, hates it hates it hates it.

"Ah, ah, h-how are you—feeling," he manages to get out despite the physiological response he hates hates hates. "I'm s-sorry. I t-took so l-long."

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"Mm-mm. You came." ... Then she pauses and gives a little snort. "To get me, I mean. Thanks. I feel warm."

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He does, too. In a completely, completely different way.

They might die here.

He's never felt this nice hugging someone before. Not even with Kang Jaeha.

They're probably going to die here.

He can't let go of the hug.

They're going to die here.

...he's still hard.

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Even with full body touch, the amount of backlash they've both racked up...

(The way she's still accumulating more by setting everything that dares come too close to them very extremely on fire...)

They might die here even now that they're together.

As they are, anyway.

"... Don't think we can stick to just snuggles," she murmurs. She makes another (tiny) mote of fire and pulls back to look at his face.

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Yeah.

So she kisses him.

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fuck

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He comes again, from the kiss, and he kisses back, and then he's gone. There's no more Lee Tae-gun. There isn't a person in there anymore. There's only need, five years of accumulated need and over three months of potentiated want, and—

—and suddenly he's on top of her, pressing her against the ground, kissing her and moaning desperately, thinking about all of the times she smiled at him and he wanted to kiss her, all of the times she smirked at him and he wanted to kiss her, all of the times she said something smart and he wanted to kiss her, all of the times she was competent and terrifying and he wanted to kiss her. They're a blur in his head, and the only two words he can breathe out when he's coming up for breath are please and Hye-jin.

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Don't worry, she's there. She is not at the same level of out-of-her-mind horny as he is, but - she's in that general neighborhood, somewhere. He is the only warm thing in a world that feels cold cold cold, and he dived into magic lava after her even though that was insane, and she should be dead and she doesn't know how she's alive, and he's in her arms and wants her with an intensity that is both hot and frightening, and he's been so sweet and cute and such a lovely competent partner and it feels incorrect that she would have given this to Hideyoshi and not Tae-gun.

(Also, she's still racking up more backlash, because she wants this dungeon dead, and even now is putting in effort to make that happen. She has discovered that her power makes this thing hurt, and actually being eaten by a dragon pissed her off, so. Fuck you, dungeon, eat fire.)

She's also fuzzy headed and tired and emotionally exhausted and she just, just wants everything else to go away for a little while. Does this make sense as a thing to want while she's also causing fiery destruction around them? Possibly not, but everybody here is in life threatening backlash. Those looking for rational thinking will have to look elsewhere for a while.

So. Really the practical thing to do is to open her legs and squirm into position and - no please required, the answer is yes.

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He can't see the fiery destruction she's wreaking, because they're still in darkness, and it's far outside. He doesn't even know it's happening, and the part of him that isn't completely gone is alarmed that her backlash is still increasing but with the way she's moving and positioning herself under him all parts of him are in agreement on what to do next. One of his hands is behind her head, fingers intertwined with her hair and pulling her in, but the other quickly reaches down so that he can adjust himself properly, press his tip against her entrance and—

—push—

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Oh he's so large. There's so much. The size and the suddenness and the compatibility and a little bit of the pain - not really much in comparison to being literally burned alive, just enough to make her feel alive - is all just. It's so much. Not that she's complaining.

Whimper.

But it's definitely a whimper of need and desire, and even if it weren't, her legs are now around him and she's moving against him in a decidedly helpful way and compatible esper sex is amazing why weren't they doing this before!

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Tae-gun—or whatever's currently possessing his body—has no idea.

He doesn't come a third time as soon as he enters her, specifically because he already came twice. Not that it would matter that much, because in this state while fucking her he just is not going to go down in the foreseeable future. Nor is he going to want to, because it's the other thoughts that are dominating his mind now: all of the times he's wanted her, the times he's imagined her naked and pleading (he can't see her body right now) (he can feel it) (but he wants to see) (he can imagine it) (and he's sure he'll be able to see it in the future), all of the times he's pictured her whimpering like this—it's so cute and so sexy, it's somehow simultaneously exactly and not at all what he'd expected, it makes him giggle and moan to hear her voice like that—and all of the times she's smirked and he's wanted to get her mouth doing something else instead, wanted to fuck her silly, fuck her nonverbal.

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He's getting that now. Not all of it—there's still so much he's imagined, so much he wants to go through—but he's inside her, and he's moving almost on instinct, and his tongue is inside her and his cock is inside her and he's got her in a vine grip to never let go. "Hye-jin... Kim Hye-jin... You're so hot, I want you so much, I've wanted you for so long—"

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Yeah, she's super nonverbal, and her tongue is kind of busy doing other things right now, but she does hum with pleasure at his words. She is so happy for him to continue, and will make soft little encouraging sounds and - squeeze him in time with - oh huh she can also time the fiery destruction she's committing outside to slightly up the backlash relief on his end. Nice. Clearly this means she's winning at sex. But maybe there are new and exciting ways to win at sex, why doesn't she try and find out empirically.

 


... They're going to be here a while. Nothing is in any position to interrupt them, least of all themselves.

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It'll take him coming inside her twice before he has enough possession to think of doing anything other than this, before it occurs to him that there's more to sex than kissing and licking and pumping—that he can use his hands more places, squeeze and pinch and grab and rub, that he can use his mouth more places, kiss and bite and suck and, and, and he wants to see, he wants to see her and he has no idea how to see her and he wants to beg to see her face and it feels mortifying but for some reason feeling mortified is turning him on even more and—

"Hye-jin, Hye-jin, Hye-jin," he says her name over and over like a prayer, like a pious man worshipping at the altar of his goddess beseeching for her favour. "I want to see you. Please let me see you."

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Mmmmm okay this is a service she can provide, here is a little light. New way to win at sex! See your partner! Amazing. They have the technology. Well, the magic.

"Hi," she murmurs inanely, beaming at him.

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"Hi."

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Giggle! Kiss.

"I'm burning the dungeon down," she informs him, when she comes up for air.

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...oh, that'll explain why her backlash has been flipflopping so much. 

"That's so hot."

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"Please don't let me interrupt you," he says, using this newly available light to better explore her and find more places for his mouth and hands to pleasure. He wants to taste her—all of her.

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That's going to make it very hard to continue burning the dungeon down, but she likes a challenge!

You know what else she likes? Him. She likes him. She'll tell him so with nibbles. And kisses. And carefully timed accumulation of backlash. And...

Suffice to say, she's happy to experiment, and is downright playful.

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If you're insane, and can either tank absurd amounts of backlash or burn it all off by fucking someone you have off-the-charts compatibility with on the go, there's really very little upper bound to how powerful you can get. Such an insane person could, perhaps, completely outburn a volcanic dungeon, in increasingly wide circles from the single point they're at. They could reach really, really far. 

As far as the dungeon's core, which has always been hiding in the lava, as pretty much everyone knew it would be. It wasn't worth planning for, you see, because if it's in lava, there's nothing anyone could do until and unless someone manifested powers that would allow them to survive swimming in lava for an extended period of time while being assailed from all sides by monsters. It wasn't worth planning for, so all plans rested on the assumption that it wasn't true, in case it wasn't. 

What is currently happening is strictly more absurd than a lava swimming power, but the dungeon core gets destroyed just as much. 

And the entire place trembles.

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—oh that was hot, how'd he move to feel like that? He wants to try to make it happen again.

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Ooooo it was, can they -?

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Knock knock.

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Still busy, go away higher thought processing.

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Yeah, so, no.

Because the higher thought processing thinks that, actually, that side project of burning the dungeon down?

Yeah, it worked.

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"Tae-gun," murmurs Hye-jin, "I think - ah! - I think we might've gotten the core. Of the dungeon."

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?

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Core. Dungeon. They got it...

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Oh.

Right.

He summons an ice cocoon around them, shaped like a teardrop with a sharp point above, and then they shoot up.

(oh that felt good, he should mess with acceleration more often)

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There isn't lava, anymore, just solid rock, so even if Tae-gun's ice weren't up to the task of dealing with the heat (it is) he'd have no trouble with it.

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And then he reduces the cocoon to a flying platform and lifts his head up to look around curiously.

(The only reason he even has this much ability to think is the number of times he's come, already. It's starting to push the ludicrous even for him.)

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There are still some volcanoes in the distance. It's unclear if they're real, though, because the parts that very definitely are real are...

...it's not a thermonuclear wasteland, but that's the image that might be conjured. The place has been nearly flattened, the lava rivers dried up, the monsters turned to rubble or worse. There are ashy impressions here and there shaped like dragons, near their exit point—clearly the dungeon was trying to congregate its forces on them, and just as clearly Hye-jin was perfectly capable of dealing with those—while the corpses of foes more distant than these are merely molten or charred, not literally reduced to dust.

And it's all crumbling down and falling apart before their eyes. There are cracks forming along the ground, but the more impressive ones are the cracks in the very air, the dimensional stability of the dungeon shattered with its core. They need to leave very quickly if they don't want to find out what happens to people who stay inside after a dungeon is destroyed.

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Um.

Okay, that's a mood killer if there ever was one. The combination of the thermonuclear wasteland (at her hands, apparently!!!) and the fact that they really need to leave right this instant. She gives Tae-gun an apologetic kiss to his cheek, then disentangles herself from him and begins muttering to herself. Hey, navigator, which way is out?

"We were, um... south... east or was it west? ... The group before us was the first to start using quadrants this round, they started north-east and south-west, we're the second - we're south east. Which would mean that the exit is..." The landmarks are somewhat toast right now, but there's a shell of a volcano that looks like it was once their stand in for north. "... that way. Exit's that way." She points.

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He lets out a pitiful whine when she pulls away but, but, but fine he'll nyoom.

(Also: more light outside! Still kind of reddish and not the best to see by but better than Hye-jin's flames in their cocoon of darkness and he can appreciate her body more.)

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Good, good, then she just has to hope she didn't forget everything related to navigation and cartography in the, uh, however long they were.... doing what they were doing for.

Absently, eyes watching the horizon to pick out further landmarks to judge the accuracy of their chosen heading, she pets him. What? He's stressed and unhappy and right there, there's no reason not to pet him.

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She doesn't have much trouble; the portal on this side is just as big as the one on the other side, and once they're close enough it's easy to see.

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The danger was in being so far away that any even mildly incorrect heading would send them off on the wrong angle and they'd completely miss the portal. But this is no longer a concern! Hooray! They are going to be able to leave the dungeon and live!

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....... Aaaaaand be immediately seen by international media. In. Their current state of dress. Which is absolutely nothing. Um.

"............ Tae-gun honey can you make us some ice pants or something," she says, suddenly confronted with something that is in fact even more of a mood killer than a thermonuclear wasteland.

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Bwuh?

...ah, right.

.................well, for Tae-gun's current mood it's not a mood killer at all, he's never really been an exhibitionist but when he's in this state he's everything.

But, well, he doesn't want Hye-jin to be sad, so, she can have an ice bikini and he can have some ice speedos, why not. It'll mostly be a blurring effect, it's not like ice is fully opaque, but they can be sufficiently thick for it to be a good blurring effect, how about?

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That'll. That'll have to do. Death is not literally better, but it's sure looking tempting. Couldn't they have just stayed in the obsidian cocoon forever, they were having a great time in there. This would have ended in their deaths.

Then she takes him by the hand and tugs him through the portal after her to have a fate that is, objectively speaking, not actually worse than death. It'll just feel like it.

Hiiiiiiii media, they're not dead, can they have blankets or something please.

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Smiiiiiiiile.

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Holy shit??????

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So the scene that's awaiting them on the other side is several very confused espers and support staff. Given the way Tae-gun and Hye-jin didn't run into anyone on their way out, either Hye-jin accidentally killed everyone or, more likely, they evacuated. The team waiting for them is much larger—twenty-five espers all told, most but not all A- or S-ranks—but the mood is one compatible with it having been assembled to try to go in and figure out wtf and then having seen the portal's edges turn green just before they were meant to do so. Now that Tae-gun and Hye-jin are stepping out of the dungeon they know—or have an idea of—what the fuck even happened, even if they're fuzzy on the detiails.

This is actually the level of surprising that does make the support staff take a little bit to get back on their game, but they're all trained for this shit and yeah Tae-gun and Hye-jin can have some blankets.

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Oh good!!! Blankets!!! Her dignity can be somewhat preserved!! And also this ice is fucking cold!!!

Also they would like to be squirreled away to a place without media reporters, and maybe get checked over by medical professionals, please and thank you.

Furthermore, they are not fielding questions at this time. The dungeon is dead. That is what matters most.

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Yeah no absolutely do they want their phones back to they want to be teleported somewhere actually they should be teleported somewhere are they alright here this tent canopy is having its tent walls all pulled down so they can get out of the eyes of the media—

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(The cold actually feels kinda nice... tingly...)

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...okay despite Lee Tae-gun's whole everything that is happening right there it seems that health-wise they're, like, backlashing badly but not in immediate risk of death, and probably the thing they need right now is, uh. To keep using the standard backlash reduction techniques.

Do they want a teleport to their silo?

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"Oh. Yes. I have special coordinates."

That's right!! When he's backlashing and horny like this he goes to his silo!!! That's so that he can be locked in and not make any...

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...decisions...

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He does not say the coordinates out loud because that habit is too deeply ingrained; he'll just type them into a terminal, making sure no one's looking, and get Hye-jin to come with him.

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Wait she thought this was going to be the split silo, not, um. This seems to be his house.

"I, um," she begins, blushing furiously.

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See, the problem here is that after fucking for hours he isn't backlashing anywhere near as hard as he was. He is now perfectly capable of holding on to reason once more.

And he really, truly wishes he weren't.

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And Lee Tae-gun's house? Is nice. Its architectural style is contemporary, square and two stories tall, its large windows overlooking the hill it's set on, far from any other signs of civilisation. The outside of the ground floor has a pool on the back, and the first floor has a nice expansive balcony. The inside is just as nice, once Tae-gun opens the door to let her in. There's a large living room with comfortable sofas, a flat screen TV on the wall, and some plants and sculptures here and there. To the right there is a dining room/kitchen combo, and straight ahead there's a closed door that probably leads into a restroom and a staircase leading up.

It's also perfectly clean. There isn't any mess, there's very little of Tae-gun's personality, maybe it's different upstairs but at least the ground floor looks like a picture perfect model of a house a realtor might want to show off. It does not, really, look like anyone lives here.

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Okay, well. She's going to reach out and take his hand before anything else. Because.... because. They're both still backlashing, anyway, physical touch is kind of super important right now.

"Do... you want me to be here...?" she offers hesitantly, aware that she's kind of intruding on his safe space.

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Man, she's already here, at this point this ship has sailed.

"Yes," he says. And... he might want to think about things in the future but now?

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Now, more won't be worse. Better, actually.

He looks up at her face again. "Kiss me," he says—pleads—begs. "Please?"

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Well, how can she say no to that?

She stands on her toes to reach him, and carefully and deliberately kisses him again.

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Tae-gun is still backlashing. He may have gotten the worst of it over with but he's still backlashing. He's always backlashing. And what he's going to do is get rid of the ice protecting their modesty and instead summon something that will take them upstairs, to his biggest bedroom, the one with the biggest bed. And there he'll kiss her again, and he'll be more patient this time, and more attentive, and no less desperate for her but with more thought and feeling.

He wants her. He wants her so much. He has wanted her for so, so long.

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(Her ice covering was already gone; the blanket that was actually protecting her has been discarded on his floor.)

She wants him, too. Not the same, not quite as hungrily or as needfully, but he is warm and cozy and sweet and hot and she's felt so alone lately, burdened with backlash she's not accustomed to carrying and away from her family and, oh yeah, on constant watch for a mind warping ex that could swoop in at any time. And then the house and trying to make an underground bunker and trying to push for an entirely new esper support system in Korea and, and. It's a lot. There's a lot. She wants to be away from it, and just be here. With him.

Anyway, suffice to say that she's happy for him to have her as long as he wants.


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MODERATOR ANNOUNCEMENT: This chat has been locked by a moderator; regular users cannot send messages until the lock is removed.

🚫do-not-jin: I'm not going to actually preemptively lock the chat but i am going to enable slowmode
🚫do-not-jin: if i catch a whiff of disrespect you're going to get a 24h mute
🚫do-not-jin: 48h if i'm feeling cranky
🚫do-not-jin: and i reserve the right to lock it if i feel like it
🚫do-not-jin: that is all

MODERATOR ANNOUNCEMENT: This chat is no longer locked; members may freely send messages again.

MODERATOR ANNOUNCEMENT: Slowmode has been enabled in this chat; members cannot send more than one message every 10 seconds.

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yoo-min-max: also if anyone is disrespectful about it i am going to personally yeet them into the sun

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taegun fan no. 1183: yeah

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yoo-min-max: i was grieving them, this company was grieving them, the entire goddamn country was grieving them

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ha-djinn: and unlike lee tae-gun and kim hye-jin if you're yote into the sun you will probably not survive it

🍸nomu?: god, what the fuck even was that

A few seconds later (before the enforced slowmode break ends) she edits her message to:

🍸nomu?: god, what the fuck even was that, like, did we know they could do that? did anyone know they could do that? i don't think i knew they could do that

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🍵Tconoisseur: badass. it was badass.
kitkatcat: got confirmation from Mexico that their backlash levels are recoverable, they were checked out by medical professionals before they went into isolation. they'll be okay.
🛡️discountraidcaptain: Can someone please check to make sure @youngwoo hears the news if he hasn't already? I don't think he's been looking at chat or news or anything lately.
💤Zzzzgirl: I'm so glad they're both okay. so so so so glad.
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yoo-min-max: he was in a dungeon, I think he still is

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🦔gangnag: ...please tell me that was the most in bad taste joke ever told by a human. please tell me he did not go into a dungeon.

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🍵Tconnoisseur: he's in the one in Ansan. straightforward rescue with Taurus, they'll take good care of him.
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🦔gangnag: but

🍸nomu?: yeah. but is right.

🦔gangnag: well someone better tell him as soon as he steps out

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yoo-min-max: @SenSoJoo and I are on it, we're siloing for another couple of hours barring emergencies and we're keeping an eye on it

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taegun fan no. 1183: god. i'm so, so happy they're okay, but. god.

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💤Zzzzgirl: yeah. yeah. and this is the first week of the confluence. my heart's going to explode if it keeps at it like this.
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yoo-min-max: yeah

...but he thinks that's enough chatting for now. He sends the commscreen away and sighs.

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"Hyung..."

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"What wouldn't I do to be in their silo right now, though, like, you know that espers are fit and all but seeing both of them, like that? And Tae-gun's not even just fit, he's hung, too. That guy's truly got it all."

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"Hy—" He starts but then cuts himself off when he sees Yoo-min's face. "Hyung..."

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Yoo-min closes his eyes and squeezes Seungjoo against his body, tightly. "Please don't leave me, Seungjoo. Please don't ever leave me. I don't know what I'd do without you. I'd, I don't, I—"

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"I'm not going to leave you. I'm here. I'll always be here."


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With Hye-jin no longer actively destroying an S-rank dungeon, they manage to get her backlash under better control after a couple more hours, by which point Tae-gun himself is pretty much fully in control again—to the extent he can ever be, with his omnipresent oceans of backlash while touching his partner. It's still not enough to completely negate the debt Hye-jin's incurred, but she's no longer at risk, even if she's not fully comfortable yet. They'll... probably need to do this again, and more, but for now they're just resting in his bed. It's been over eight hours since they've entered the dungeon, and they're exhausted.

"I lose my cool," Tae-gun says, still snuggling her for the guiding. "I lose control and it's, it's. Anger, impulsivity, loss of filter, this. It's the opposite of cold. I—" He pauses, and sighs. "I get a little bit of steering power, if I think to do it before it gets really bad, and I usually aim for this, because it's... If I'm like this I'm too, too far gone to make mistakes. I lock myself here, and the security systems don't let me out, and they're not difficult to get around, I'm just too, too... that... to have the higher faculties necessary to do so. Less so when I'm angry, and the most powerful man in Korea should not backlash into anger. And I... the other things...

"Well, you know most of the things I didn't want to tell you, by now. You can ruin me, if you want to. I'm truly in your hands."

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Hye-jin at least tries to pretend to be a sensible person, and has insisted on getting them some goddamned water. She nearly spits hers out at his statement, though.

"... You dove into magic dungeon lava to save me. Why the fuck would I ruin you?" Sigh. "Don't answer that, just. Just. I won't, okay?" Huff. "No need to be so damned dramatic, you know. I'd guessed what your backlash was in the first week we partnered. You'll notice I haven't told a soul."

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"...you... guessed it?"

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"Yes! I would have phrased it as - loss of emotional regulation and self control, and wouldn't have managed to figure out it was only thematically hot emotions without seeing it more in action, but. I did see you backlashing, multiple times, before we got the split silo set up. I wasn't trying to figure it out, actually I was actively trying not to, but. ... Look it seems obvious when I see how much your power is about control?"

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"...I guess." Pause. "Then—did you—you knew that that—the face I made at you. The. Korea. One."

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"I - I mean, sort of? It's not weird for partners to be attracted to each other? And I always hated when people read into every little thing I ever did, looking for ways to neaten and pare down my life to fit in their cute little dollhouses. I didn't want to do that to you."

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He buries his face in her shoulder.

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Hug. And pet, he likes being pet.

"I'm also not going to, to. I-if you want to do this sort of thing again, I am," and she looks away and he can hear the embarrassment in her voice, "um, supportive of that decision. If you'd like to call this level of guiding a one time emergency thing that we should avoid ever doing again, that is also fine, and I'd support that, too. You haven't... ruined anything with me, or something? We still get to say what we want our partnership to be."

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"So you don't think it's... awful? That I'm. Not there. When I'm backlashing...?"

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Honestly, she'd argue that he is in fact still there when he's backlashing, that the emotions that are being magnified are still his, it's just he's so hung up on his 'self' equating to 'control' that it feels like he's absent. But he wouldn't agree, and furthermore that is not an argument she particularly wants to start, especially not right now.

"No? Why would I hold your backlash against you, ever?"

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"Not... holding it against me. I just mean... You know, people usually want to have sex with, um. Other people."

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"... You're going to have to expand on that train of thought a bit more? Do you mean like, you're afraid my vagina is now magically sealed by pact to only accept one penis and feel weird about it being yours, or...?"

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"....what?"

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"Your sentence was confusing first! Are you asking if I'm going to want to sleep around, because right now the answer is probably not? I don't know how to pick up people at bars or, or, whatever it is people do, my dating and romantic life is incoherent screaming and hiding under the bed. Maybe eventually? But I've got like half a decade of Japanese celebrity good girl deprogramming to do."

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"—oh. No, not that. I mean that, uh, if. I mean if I'm backlashing. I mean that you'd—you might want to have sex with me but that's not the same as having sex with. That."

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"???? 'That'?? You mean you when you're backlashing? ... Empirically yes????"

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"Well, I. I mean. I. I suppose." Though she was also backlashing badly at the time and it was literally saving both of their lives so he wasn't inclined to take that as indicative of any long term preferences.

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"I. Did go and say I support the decision of 'we do this again,'" she points out, still a little shyly, not looking at him.

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"Y-yeah. You d-did. So, I, I mean, then I'm a-also—"

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Woo-young video calls Tae-gun.

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That startles him out of his stammery blush.

...video? Why the hell, what's up—Tae-gun grabs his phone, turns it away from Hye-jin so that the camera will only show him shoulders-up, then accepts the call. "Woo-young-ah?"

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For the fraction of a second he's onscreen he looks dreadful.

Then he hangs up and appears directly on top of Tae-gun.

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Squeak.

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And now he's pulling both of them into a hug, his glasses are crooked on his face and he's crying all over them, heart-wrenching breathless sobs and blubbering and hiccupping and completely, completely breaking down.

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She's still not wearing any clothes, and so will be taking the blanket with her into this hug, because eep, but, but, um. Yeah the world probably thought they were dead for... a while. This would have effects. (Shit she needs to call her parents!)

Despite the circumstances, she will still hug him back and begin applying pats immediately. While wishing very desperately she had on clothes.

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...what... happened...

.....Tae-gun is very slightly compatible with Woo-young and. And he can tell that. Woo-young's doing bad, backlash-wise, right now.

He pulls Woo-young's glasses off his face to place them on his bedside table then returns to the hug. "Woo-young-ah?"

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"Ah," hiccup, "ah," hiccup, "you're ah, alive, ah," sob. "You're alive. You're alive. Ah." He's having trouble breathing, he's sobbing too much and hiccupping too much and it's making him dizzy but they're alive alive alive they're alive he has no idea how this happened he doesn't understand he doesn't need to they're alive they're alive—

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"We are, we're okay, sorry for scaring you we absolutely did not plan to be that monumentally stupid, we're okay..."

Apply pats directly to the Woo-young. It is required.

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"Woo-young-ah, what's wrong, why is your backlash so bad, why aren't you with Tae-hwan—"

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At Tae-hwan's name he wails, and it's actually not possible for him to cry any harder than he's crying but he can cry louder and he's doing that now and he can't say words anymore he can't say words or think thoughts or, or anything, he can't can't can't they're alive that's all that matters they're alive—

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...oh. Oh. Oh no.

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Oh.

Backlashing badly and wailing at Tae-hwan's name is. Very indicative. And she doesn't currently remember what Tae-hwan's power is, but she does remember he specialized more in protection and that this is... naturally on the upper end of danger for esper jobs...

Fuck.

"... We're okay, we're here," she murmurs, gently, squeezing him in the hug.

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Yeah.

Fuck.

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He's not going to think, he's not going to think about how he only lost one person he loved today rather than three, he's not going to, he's not, he can't, he can't, it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts so much he can't he can't he can't—

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"Woo-young-ah, I'm..." Fuck. Fuck.

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Yeah, this seems like it is not a talking time, to be honest. It is a petting and holding him time. Hye-jin can provide this service. (She really wishes she were wearing some clothes.)

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Honestly she could've turned green and acquired two more arms and he wouldn't have noticed or cared, that's just, just. They're alive. They're alive, they're here, in flesh and blood, it's not a dream, they're real. That's. That's all that matters.

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Yeah. He can just... be here, for Woo-young. That's the least he can do, even if he doesn't know how to do any better than that, Tae-gun can be here for him. He's always done the same for Tae-gun, after all.


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He takes a long, long time to cry himself out but eventually he does manage to reacquire some semblance of calm. "I'm sorry. For, for just—showing up."

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"It's," she desperately wishes to be wearing clothes right now and it is doing everyone a disservice if she glosses that as 'fine.' "extenuating circumstances, you know? It's okay." There. That was honest and empathetic. She doesn't unhug and will instead offer more petting.

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"I—"

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Lee Tae-gun has a moment of inspiration, or perhaps realisation. He suddenly, from one moment to the next, has acquired understanding of an emotion Woo-young has around him very, very often.

"Woo-young-ah, are you about to say something you would be mad at me for saying in your shoes?"

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He stops, then covers his mouth. "Oh... I was."

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"Why don't we move to a more comfortable position and location than 'piled up on my bed' and talk?" he asks, gently. He's not sure where all of this inspiration is coming from but he is certain that that is the sort of thing Woo-young would've said, here.

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"And probably acquire food," points out Hye-jin, who is still gamely attempting practicality.

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"And, um." She should save on teleports, considering. "... Tae-gun can I borrow some of your clothes."

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"Oh, I, I'm sorry." He covers his eyes, now.

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"Sure." Here's an ice knife to float over to one of his closets and pull it open for her. Tae-gun's wardrobe is... white, and black, and white, and black, and occasionally dark grey, and occasionally somewhat less dark grey, and white, and black, and this one expensive-looking navy blue suit.

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"You have seen nothing that the international media hasn't gotten a good long shot of, really."

Wow. Uh. She'll. Take a dark grey shirt???? It is incredibly oversized for her and there's no way she can possibly fit into his pants but, you know what, it's better than nothing. She'll take it.

"I'm, uh, slightly more decent," she says when it's on. "Food options? I'm assuming secret not-actually-underground lair doesn't get takeout delivery."

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"It's... stocked with some instant stuff. Maybe eggs," he says, pulling himself up to a seated position. "Woo-young-ah, how much can you move?"

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"Ah, I can... move my arms and my head. And I think that's it."

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...damn it, Woo-young. Well, Tae-gun will—

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—catch a glimpse of Hye-jin in his T-shirt—

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—focus.

He'll get Woo-young an ice hoverchair, pad it with pillows and blankets (he can make the ice temperature-neutral, but there's no reason to be increasing his backlash, so he's not going all the way with that), then he helps pull Woo-young onto said chair.

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Hye-jin therefore considers it her job to sort out food options! She will be raiding Tae-gun's pantry with neither decency nor shame. A rice cooker is located and then put to work almost immediately.

"I think I can manage some slightly bland omurice," she muses as she hands Woo-young a cup of water. The man has been crying, after all. "Does that work for you two?"

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"Sure."

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"Yeah." He accepts the water and drinks it slowly.

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Nod! Okay! She can-!

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Tae-gun is still stark naked.

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Not important! Doesn't matter! She's fine! She has a job and it is MAKING FOOD.

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Woo-young notices her reaction, looks up at Tae-gun, then laughs. It's not a very warm laugh but he's trying. 

"Hyung, I think you're scandalising your partner."

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"What? Oh. ...why?"

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"It's fine! I'm fine! It's perfectly fine for him to be naked in his own home if he wants to be!" she blurts, distracting herself by attempting to find something that will add flavor to fried rice.

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"People don't usually receive guests naked."

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"...both of you have seen me naked. Hye-jin and I had sex."

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Oh wait shit thinking about that makes him blush.

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"You did?" he asks in delight. Or something that passes for it, if you're not paying attention. "Finally."

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"I, that, you, but, it." Nevermind, her words aren't working. She will instead be INDUSTRIOUSLY doing more pantry raiding. Look! A chicken stock bouillon! Amazing.

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"We were snuggling in bed naked, why are you surprised anyway," he grumbles.

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"I wasn't really thinking, back there, on account of all of the crying."

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...no, making light of it didn't work, fuck his breath is hitching again.

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...yeah.

"Do you want to... hold my hand?"

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"Hyung, with the tiny amount of compatibility we have we would actually need to fuck for it to be at all useful."

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...it's still not working. 

"And I'm, I'm not ready for that. Yet. Not with... anyone else."

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Nod.

Yeah, that's. Yeah.

She's particularly concerned about him getting dumped with someone new within the next week. It's probably going to happen no matter what any of them do. Confluence, and all. Quasar really, really, really relies on Woo-young's teleportation in particular. There's going to be a lot of pressure to get his powers fully functional again. Which sucks so, so, so much. He should be allowed to mourn before being hawked off to someone else for the good of Korea.

Anyway she's making food, she doesn't have to voice her opinions here. Well, okay, she will anyway, for practical reasons: "Probably cuddling is better than nothing, if you're okay with that?"

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...maybe...?

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Yeah. He can quickly assemble a pillow pile in the dining room using his knives to fetch the pillows so that they don't leave Hye-jin all alone in the kitchen and then he can move Woo-young there and put an arm around his shoulders.

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Oh.

Okay. 

He might cry again actually.

"Can I have a smoke?"

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"Of course."

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Light. Drag. Puff.

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Yeah.

"Do you want space, or - I don't know, weird dungeon minutiae to distract you?" she wonders, since she can both prepare food and offer her typical brand of nerdery at the same time.

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"I, part of me wants to know how you're alive and part of me wants to talk about him so I don't forget anything about him ever and part of me wants to get distracted and to forget and I don't know."

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Nod.

"Well, the minutiae can come with an explanation of how we're alive, and then once there's food in you you can decide if you want to talk about him or not?" Because that will probably involve lots of crying. He should have calories for crying. (Her stomach grumbles. Yes, thank you, she knows. She will feed you, too.)

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"Yeah. Okay. Sounds like a plan."

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He gives Woo-young's shoulder a squeeze.

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"So - Volcanic Range. I was expecting to be, well, glorified arm candy for sunbae? With important navigational duties, but, like, we all knew why I was there. How could I help much. Who expects fire to counter lava, you know? It goes against all video game logic. Except, I don't think it was lava? I'm not sure what it was instead, one of those bullshit dungeon substances that could probably be leveraged into making something fantastic, I'd guess that the lava-alike would be great for some kind of fuel - anyway. But my point is that it didn't burn like lava. It burned like kindling, and then that was it, it was used up."

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...it feels like he should show interest now. Not that he's not interested, he is, but it feels like now there'd be a little part of him figuring out a thing to say that would also signal that interest aloud. He's having trouble with it. 

"In what way do you mean?" There, he tried.

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"Oh, I mean that I was actually a fantastic counter to it and could burn its fuel before it could use it for shenanigans! Killed the monsters with it very quickly, and none of that inconvenient exploding nonsense. It was great."

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"But obviously it noticed and, uh. The dungeon got extremely mad and murderous. At me in particular. So. That was how I got eaten and dragged into the not-actually-lava. How I survived is, um. .... Sunbae can I borrow an ice knife? I want to test something."

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?

Sure, here she goes.

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Okay, cool!

She moves to the sink, then carefully and deliberately slices her arm open.

It starts healing near immediately. (Tae-gun can feel a slight increase in her backlash as it closes up, but it's very subtle.)

"Yeah, uh. I have regeneration, and never figured it out because. Where do you test that, I was avoiding injuries."

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He aborts the motion to jump up when he sees what she's doing because it is currently Woo-young snuggle time but what the fuck Hye-jin.

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"...so you survived and..." He looks up at Tae-gun's face. "You went after her to... save her? You knew she was alive?"

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"...I could. Feel her. Her backlash, I mean. And I followed it."

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...did he have a plan. What kind of question is that, Woo-young, of course he didn't have a plan.

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Oh, like you can judge her, Tae-gun, with your constant use of ice blades for basic tasks even under your mountain of backlash. They've had two sex marathons, one of which was with her racking up as much backlash as possible and therefore eating at a lot of his, and it's barely made a dent in his backlash! Stop doing more things!!! A small slice on her arm is nothing in comparison, really!!!!!

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Anyway yes conversation.

"Right, yeah. I was racking up a lot. I, um. Was kind of expecting to die down there, and so started doing my best to take as much of the dungeon with me as I could? Then Tae-gun showed up."

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"Which, um. Went. As you can probably guess." Pause. "But also I was burning the dungeon down in the background because I was mad."

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".....you literally fucked so hard you destroyed an S-rank dungeon."

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See he might've been blushing about that but he's having some emotions about the way Hye-jin just used his personal name there. It was... probably a slip? But he's really not sure how it makes him feel.

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"..... Y...yes. Yes we did. Um. And stepped out of the dungeon portal stark naked for all of the world to see. So. That. That's nice."

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"But the dungeon is dead now! Which is the really important part."

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You should—examine these feelings later. Not now. Now is not the time. 

"What did people outside... think happened?" He and Hye-jin have been in complete isolation since.

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"They saw the two of you be ganged up on all of a sudden. They figured... you must've found something, that hadn't happened before—but the dungeon got in the way of letting them help you. Then they saw the, the rock dragon, and they said that everything happened really fast after that but in the end there were several explosions and you were just floating there—they assumed it was you but it's not like they could see more than a dot in the distance—and then you shot into the lava." Everyone thought he was doing some sort of suicidal run to destroy the core or something, assuming that must've been why the dungeon suddenly started trying to kill them.

"Then the dungeon started to get really, really hot, and they evacuated, and—you both went into the lava. We thought—we all thought—"

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Ah fuck.

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He pulls Woo-young closer.

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No, you know what? He's starting to get mad now that he's thinking about it. "Tae-hwan was dead. He was already dead then. He was dead and, and then I hear the two of you were also dead, and you were fucking?? You were fucking!!! You were having sex in a fucking dungeon! And Tae-hwan was dead!"

He wants to try to push Tae-gun away but he still doesn't have much movement back. "Fuck you! Fuck both of you!! How, how, why—"

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He looks away and takes a drag of his cigarette because this shit isn't good for his heart.

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Wince.

"We..." would have died if we hadn't. That's not useful to say. "Yeah. Sorry."

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He knows. He knows. "Hyung get rid of my cig."

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...sure. He does that.

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And then Woo-young turns towards Tae-gun again and curls up as small as he can when he still can't move his legs and most of his spine and sobs in Tae-gun's arms.

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Yeah. She'll just. Continue quietly making food. (The fried rice is done, and the first batch of omurice is almost ready.)

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"I, I, ah," he hiccups. "I feel like—like I'm s-second-guessing everything because whenever I hear what I'm feeling," hic, "I th-think, if hyung were saying this to me I'd, ah, be making fun of him for it."

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"...I'm glad I can serve as your thermometer for how ridiculous your feelings can get."

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He giggle-hiccups into Tae-gun's skin.

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Hye-jin gives a little soft huff.

"I think you're allowed to feel whatever you want, and that it's better for you to express your feelings than hold them in and call them stupid. So. I hereby give you permission to be sunbae stupid at emotional regulation."

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"Getting ganged up on now, am I."

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"Keep that idea in reserve, hyung, I might take you up on it."

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"—oh, you're considering it!"

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"Shut up!"

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"I, that, um!"

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No, don't burn the egg part of the omurice this is key!

Plate. Fried rice. Omelette. "Sunbae I need another ice knife, I promise I have good intentions for this one," she says, instead of engaging with, uh, any of that.

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Yep yep he should not be giving Woo-young any more ammunition here's the knife.

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"...but you see why this is really stupid right? I was just sobbing and now I'm fine. And I think I just read too many therapy books because I keep telling myself it's okay to feel whatever I'm feeling until that's all I'm hearing in my head and I'm not feeling anything and I don't know what it is that's okay for me to feel."

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Slice open the omelette, to dump delicious eggy goodness over the fried rice! Behold. It is edible. Ketchup is traditionally added but is not required, the bottle will instead be offered on the side.

"I... think that's just how grief works? I mean, I haven't read many therapy books, but. I don't think any of that's stupid. Also: behold, food."

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Cool Tae-gun can—hmm he'd been thinking of bringing Woo-young with him to the table but actually he thinks that probably he should keep snuggling so instead he'll bring the food over here.

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"Thank you. ...both of you." He unhugs a bit to accept the plate and start picking at it. "It's just stupid. I'm—I'm going to say the kind of dumb hell iPhone shit hyung likes to say, fair warning."

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"It's not nice to call America hell, Woo-young-ah."

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Well now he's sobbing again.

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...that was not the reaction he'd been expecting!!!

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Same from Hye-jin, actually!

"I feel like we're the two people least likely to hold acting like Ta-sunbae against you. I mean, it's literally him and his partner. Honestly I think seeing this in someone else is probably very good for him."

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"It's just not funny. That stupid joke. It's just not that funny so why, why did, why did Tae-hwan, ah, why did Tae-hwan laugh so much when I told it to him and why is he never going, going to laugh again! His stupid laugh! The stupid dumb half-grin and, ah." He nearly drops the plate, would've without Tae-gun's help, he's taken over by a wave of vertigo and nausea. "Why? Why did he laugh so much? 

"And, and he was a fucking hero. He was a hero, did you know? He saved everyone in that dungeon. And I wasn't there," he's starting to hyperventilate, "I could've gotten him out but I wasn't, wasn't assigned—he saved everyone. Someone fucked up and killed the core too soon and he stayed behind until everyone else was out and then, and then, and then—"

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"Oh Woo-young-ah, I'm so sorry..."

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"He was twenty-three! He was younger than Seungjoo! Why is he dead! Why, why, why, Tae-hwan why, why didn't you leave, why—"

He can't speak anymore because he can't breathe, his body is shaking with the violent sobbing and he'd have hugged Woo-young and not said anything and interlaced their fingers together and kissed Woo-young's knuckles and now he's never going to do that again, because he's dead.

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Oh, fuck, that's a really awful way to go. And the - the uncertainty of it, the not knowing what would have happened to him after the dungeon closed...

She has not actually started on the next batch of omurice yet (she was still on beating the eggs), so there's nothing stopping her from putting this down to give him a hug.

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"He's dead, he's dead, ah, he's dead, why, why why why why why why why why—" How can anything ever be okay again, how, how can, how is he going to, how is he going to wake up in the morning?

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"And, and we don't have his body, so we can't bury him, and no one has time for, for a fucking funeral, or even just to go to a shrine to light some incense, and he hated the smell of incense—"

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"Woo-young-ah—"

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"Shut up. Just, just shut up, just hug me and let me pretend for ten minutes, just. Just shut up..."

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Yeah. Okay. They can do that.

...fuck, Tae-hwan...

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Yeah.


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This is Kang Jaeha's fourth confluence and, like in the last three, Kang Jaeha's main job will be dealing with Nightmare. It hasn't appeared yet, though, and there are other dungeons that could benefit from his help; amongst the many ways in which his powers are superior to those of other psychic espers is the fact that they work on a large class of monsters, too, so he has some niche uses even in dungeons that have no mental effects at all. That said, there are so few psychic espers that he usually doesn't have to do that, there's always more psychic dungeons for him to go help with.

And this means that he's not on assignment when he hears the news.

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He's not sure what he's feeling, when it happens. That's usually true—whenever he feels anything at all, he mostly doesn't bother trying to figure out what, and it goes away as quickly as it came—but now that's even more the case, that he doesn't know, and it's not going away at all. If there's one person who has always been able to mess with Kang Jaeha's head and heart, it's Lee Tae-gun, so it's no wonder that Lee Tae-gun's death would do the same.

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"...hyung?" asks his partner, a younger guy called Kim Insoo, looking alarmed.

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...alarmed? Why is he alarmed? Does Jaeha look very—oh. He dropped his mug of coffee and spilled it all over himself. It... actually hurts, a bit, the burning. "Ah," he says, trying to reboot his face.

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"Sorry, Insoo-ya, I just got—really surprised," he says, aiming for "a bit shaken and trying to awkwardly paper over it". He reaches for some paper towel to dry his hands and notices they're very, very red.

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"Hyung, that looks bad, did you spill it anywhere else?"

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He looks down and, yeah, the bottom of his shirt and the top of his trousers have coffee on them. "I did."

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"Okay, cold water, right now, to prevent any further damage," says Insoo, walking over to Jaeha to start pushing him towards the bathroom.

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Right. Yes. Burns. Those are... important, somehow. For some reason. He's not totally sure what the reason is, but the version of him Insoo knows does agree with that, and so he hurries appropriately to get some cold water running onto the places the scalding hot coffee spilled on him.

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(Tae-gun can't be dead. He can't be dead. That's not, that's not a way the world can be.)

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"Hyung, Jesus Christ, are you that shocked Lee Tae-gun died?"

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...Insoo is feeling insecure. Of course he is, because Jaeha always keeps him on the edge of that insecurity on purpose—still a bit jealous about the parnership Jaeha had with Tae-gun, wanting to measure up, wanting to impress Jaeha—but this would tip it too far. He gets rid of Insoo's most recent memories and replaces them with an illusion where Jaeha reacted more promptly to spilling the coffee—

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When the newscaster says Lee Tae-gun and Kim Hye-jin are dead he gasps and drops his mug of scalding hot coffee. "Ah, shit!" he exclaims, immediately stepping away from the counter and reaching for paper towel to try to get clean himself.

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"...hyung? Oh, shit, hyung, are you alright?"

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"Yeah, just—fuck—was surprised and spilled my coffee. Ah, help me with this—should I run some cold water—obviously I should."

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"Yeah! Take your clothes off, how bad is it?"

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He gestures at where his clothes got coffee on them as he hurries towards the bathroom.

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"Oh, ouch. Did that reach—"

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He lets out a laugh. "It did not reach my cock, Insoo-ya," he says, stepping into the bathroom and turning the water on. He quickly kicks his shoes off, strips, and gets under the shower.

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"Don't laugh, it's not like that! It's a very sensitive area—"

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Aaand they're back to real time, now.

"I'm just messing with you, Insoo-ya. See? It's fine, pretty contained."

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"Hyung, seriously," he sighs. "...were you that shocked by, um—"

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There, that's the touch of uncertainty he wanted.

"...yeah. I mean—I mean, shit, Insoo-ya, it's not even the, it's Lee Tae-gun and Kim Hye-jin! Like, fuck, that's going to be a huge blow to, to everyone's morale—not to mention the dungeons themselves they could've helped with—"

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"...right, yeah." He feels kinda relieved and embarrassed—

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Nuh uh.

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—he feels pretty embarrassed about the question, honestly. He knows it's silly, he knows Jaeha loves him. It's just—you know.

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"Insoo-ya. Babe. Cm'ere."

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"You're all wet."

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"Cm'ere," he repeats.

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...fine. He does. Blushing a bit.

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Jaeha does not actually want to touch Insoo, right now.

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He pulls Insoo into a one-armed hug, trying to keep the water from splashing him too badly while making sure it's still running over the burns.

"It's been years. I've said this before. You know I have eyes for only you, right?"

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"Yeah. I do. I really do, hyung."

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"Then kiss me."

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He does.

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"...it's probably going to have consequences about dungeon assignments, though," he says once he's pulled away.

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"Nothing to do with us, though, right? We wouldn't really be going into the same dungeons as them."

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"Yeah—or, well, not directly. But it's definitely going to have ripples, all of the guilds in Korea will be affected by it."

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Jaeha's phone rings in his trousers pocket.

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"...and that's probably going to be related. Fetch that for me?"

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"Yeah, sure." He grabs Jaeha's phone.

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It's the Lucid Guild president.

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Yeah.

"I have to take this, Insoo-ya," he says, reluctantly pulling away from the hug. "Give me a bit and shut the door?"

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"Yeah, of course. Let me know if I can help in any way."

He steps out and closes the door behind himself.

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And while Kim Insoo thought that was happening Jaeha has been sitting on the floor of the shower stall under the water, scrolling through the news. What happened, what the fuck happened, how, how, this can't, this can't be real—

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It's real. It's very, very real. The news is sparse on the details, clearly everyone's trying to keep as tight a lid on this as possible until they figure out what to tell the media, but you can't really paper over the entire team evacuating the dungeon, looking somewhere between concerned and terrified, except for Lee Tae-gun and Kim Hye-jin, and not draw conclusions. The media drew conclusions, and the guilds confirmed that the two espers have gone missing in such a way that they're presumed dead, and that's it.

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Okay, the news is fucking useless, how about internal comms?

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That does have more details! The dungeon got really, really violent all of a sudden, ate Kim Hye-jin, then Lee Tae-gun singlehandedly dispatched several huge monsters, took the brunt of several explosions to the face, then dove into the lava.

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No.

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He texts Insoo, saying that he's going in for a meeting at HQ, then grabs all of his clothes and requests a teleport to the silo they don't share.

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He walks over to the table in his living room, flips it over, and starts screaming.

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No. No no no no no this is not a way the world is allowed to be, this is not something that can happen. Lee Tae-gun has a hundred percent clearance rate on all dungeons rank A or lower, he has never gotten injured on duty, there is nothing that can hurt him, he's, he's—he can't die. He can't die. Nothing should be able to kill him, least of all himself, least of all because of that bitch.

How dare she? How dare she? She didn't even survive so that he could kill her himself, she took—took—she took Tae-gun and then took him again and she needs to hurt, she needs to hurt, she needs to die screaming, except she probably did and that's not enough. It's not enough. It should've been him, she should've died by his hand, and she should not have taken Tae-gun with her.

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Tae-gun is his. Does she not understand this? Does no one understand this? Tae-gun. Is. His.

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(Anger, he notes in the back of his mind. The thing he's feeling right now is anger. When someone starts trashing their dining room and kitchen and screaming and cursing dead people, they're angry.)

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...and... something else?

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He touches his cheek and looks at his fingers.

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They're wet.

He's crying.

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That's fitting, too, he supposes, because the last time he cried was also a time when he lost Tae-gun.

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He's crying. He's sad. He's sitting on the floor, his energy has entirely left him, and he's crying. He's crying, because Tae-gun is dead.

He cried more, last time. He was a lot more able to feel things, so it shouldn't be surprising, but it feels... wrong. It feels wrong that not even Tae-gun's death is enough to pierce through his apathy. If anything could, that ought to have.

Tae-gun is... dead.

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He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know what to do. This has never been true, this hasn't been true for at least five years, he's always known what to do, always known what his next step was. There was only one thing, one thing he could care about, one goal above all others, and now it's gone, and he doesn't have anything to replace it with.

Jaeha feels... cold. He never feels warm, except he now realises he always did, or always warmer than this. He always had Tae-gun. Everything he was doing was for Tae-gun. Everything he was, everything he is, is for Tae-gun.

Tae-gun... is the love of his life.

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Tae-gun is the love of his life. It's always been Tae-gun. Jaeha is nothing without Tae-gun. He was nothing before Tae-gun, and the only thing he was after Tae-gun was someone who needed to have Tae-gun. He needs Tae-gun. Needs it more than food and water and air, he needs Tae-gun.

He needs Tae-gun.

He needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he needs Tae-gun he n

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He can't breathe. He can't breathe. His air is gone. He needs Tae-gun. Tae-gun can't be gone. Tae-gun can't be gone. He needs Tae-gun. He can't breathe. Tae-gun can't be gone. He needs Tae-gun. He doesn't need air, he doesn't need to breathe, but he needs Tae-gun.

Tae-gun. Tae-gun. Tae-gun. Tae-gun. Tae-gun.

Tae-gun.

Tae-gun's face. Tae-gun's smile. Tae-gun's beautiful eyes and soft lips and smooth hair and shy blushing and the way he moaned when Jaeha was kissing him and the way he cried when Jaeha was fucking him and his long arms and his pretty hands and his firm torso and his delicious cock and his toned legs and his elegant feet and his smell and his taste and his voice and his breath and his happiness and his misery and his love and his hatred and

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Tae-gun cannot be dead.

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Fuck.

Tae-gun can't be dead. He can't be dead. Did Jaeha ever tell him how much he loved him? Did Jaeha say it enough times? Did he tell Tae-gun how beautiful Tae-gun was? How much he needed Tae-gun? Tae-gun can't be dead, because if Tae-gun is dead, that means Tae-gun died without Jaeha telling him those things. Or saying them enough times. Or making Tae-gun believe them enough. If he could—could—if only he could—

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Jaeha knows what to do.

Tae-gun can't be dead. From that, it follows that the people who said he's dead are wrong.

So Jaeha just needs to prove it. He just needs to go there, he needs to go to that dungeon, and, and find Tae-gun. That's all. That's all he needs to do. He needs to stand up. He needs to stand up, he needs to, to be standing up. He can't walk to the dungeon if he's not standing up. He needs to stand up.

Jaeha needs to stand up. Why isn't he standing up?

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His stomach. He feels something in his stomach. That's why he can't stand up. He's, he ate something bad, and it's affecting him. That's what that is. So even if he can't properly stand up, he can drag himself to the kitchen sink and pull himself up enough to go sick into it, and then his stomach will be fine, and he'll be able to stand up. That's what he'll do. That's what he does. So now he should be able to stand up.

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...he should be able to stand up. He needs to stand up. Why is he still not standing up.

Food. That's why. He just went sick, so now his stomach is empty, and his blood sugar is low. He needs to eat. He should eat something sugary, for a burst of energy, but also something with more substance, to sustain him when he goes into the dungeon. It's Volcanic Range, that's not a dungeon you can go into on an empty stomach. So he needs to eat, and then wait until he has enough energy to stand up, and then he'll go to the dungeon, and then he'll find Tae-gun. That's what he'll do.

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Tae-gun can't be dead. Tae-gun can't be dead. Tae-gun can't be dead. Tae-gun can't be dead.

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(Please God, please don't let Tae-gun be dead. He can't, he can't live in a world where Tae-gun is dead. Please. He hasn't prayed since he was a child, hasn't prayed in decades, but please, please. If there's anyone listening, anyone at all. Please don't let Tae-gun be dead. Please let him be alright. Please let it be a misunderstanding, let it be a mirage, or a nightmare. Let it be Nightmare, let it be, let it be something else. Anything, anything else. Anything but this.)

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He gets something in his stomach, and as he starts to plan farther ahead he realises that he can't just show up at the dungeon. Not just because there'll be cameras or he'll be detected; he has a guy. If he gets there, and finds Tae-gun, and saves him, then what? How is he going to explain this to Lucid? How is he going to explain it to Insoo? He's under no illusions that Tae-gun will just accept him, and he shouldn't plan assuming that that'll happen. Tae-gun may feel grateful, he might be able to leverage that, but he has to think longer term.

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(He can't live in the world where Tae-gun is dead. Since the alternative is unthinkable, he has to take actions assuming he lives in the thinkable world. That's the same logic they use for dungeons like Volcanic Range, where they're almost certain that the way to defeat them isn't feasible in most possible universes so they strategise for the universes where it is. In the world where Tae-gun is dead, there are no possible actions Jaeha can take that will ever mean anything again, so he must live in the world where Tae-gun is not dead, and in that world what he needs to do is prove that Tae-gun is not dead and get him out.)

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...he's been thinking about this all wrong.

If Tae-gun is alive—because Tae-gun is alive—he needs to be rescued. And Jaeha can't rescue him. Jaeha will die, if the reports are correct he'll die as soon as he steps into the dungeon, and if he dies then he can't save Tae-gun.

No. What Jaeha needs to do is to mount a rescue. He needs to find people, any people, who can go into that dungeon and find Tae-gun. But everyone thinks Tae-gun is dead, so they're not going to go into it with that possibility in mind, they're not going to look that hard.

Jaeha needs to find people. Jaeha knows people, knows quite a lot of people, all over the world. He has contacts, he's powerful, he's owed favours. And he's good at this. He forgot that for a moment, he lived too long in the unthinkable world, but he's good at this, and if Tae-gun is to survive, he needs to give it his all. He needs to give this a real shot. Twenty people? Maybe twenty-five? They're going to need to be handpicked to be able to do search and rescue in that environment, and those people will of course all be busy with other dungeons in the confluence but it's early, it's only day four, there aren't that many S-rank dungeons already out. And everyone will agree that they can't lose Lee Tae-gun, he's too strong a weapon against dungeons like these, they can't lose him on day four (they can't lose him ever).

He grabs his phone. He has many, many calls to make.


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They don't have a very productive rest of their day, and for the first time in Tae-gun's life he thinks that's a good thing. Hye-jin calls her parents to reassure them, and prez texts Tae-gun to make sure they're still alive, and then Woo-young tells them stories and tidbits about Tae-hwan. Just little things he thinks about randomly as he speaks like the dumb faces he used to make while watching movies and how he was actually scared of horror ones and loved romcoms, how he'd actually wanted to be a firefighter when he was younger so becoming an esper was like a dream come true, how he'd sometimes talk in his sleep, how cute the way the corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled was, how he was jealous of Tae-gun but didn't like to admit it and how Woo-young would pet him and try to reassure him, how much he loved his job and going out every day and seeing people and protecting them, how much time he spent on his hair and skincare in the morning...

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They all sleep together that night (not like that, pervs), with Tae-gun in the middle so that he can guide both of them, and by the time they wake up Woo-young can fully move his upper body again, if slowly and with difficulty, and Tae-gun summons a regular non-magical wheelchair from guild storage for him. Hye-jin is still suffering from more backlash than she's ever had in her life, though mostly not in the acute hypothermia way, while Tae-gun... got his background backlash reduced, on net, but by less than one would've expected, given how he also got a lot more backlash from taking the brunt of several explosions to the face right before diving into magic lava and swimming in it for a while to find Hye-jin.

The three of them have no assignments today, barring emergency calls, so they're just having a lazy morning, which Tae-gun once again surprisingly doesn't object to. It might help that he's feeling better than he has in literal years, physically speaking: some old pains have eased, and he's had a great night's sleep, at least compared to his usual. Which obviously he feels guilty as hell about, because Tae-hwan is dead, especially when Woo-young has a short bout of crying when he wakes up and Tae-gun hugs him to console him, but so it goes. Now they're all in Tae-gun's kitchen, Woo-young making some coffee while Tae-gun is looking at news and other updates on his phone.

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Hye-jin is still a little chilly; it's managable, but usually she manages it with... clothes. Which she mostly doesn't have. The coffee will help, but the coffee isn't ready yet.

"Is there a way to bring in... clothes... here. Without teleporting off to grab them from my house or the split silo? Not that I don't make your shirts look great, but." She feels very exposed, okay.

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Tae-gun: is still naked.

"I think I have warmer clothes?"

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Woo-young: is wearing Tae-gun's clothes, but he can actually reasonably fit in them, and does not have a cold-inducing backlash.

"Hyung, you're really something sometimes," Woo-young sighs. He opens the commscreen and, "Wait, actually, did you guys already replace your chips? I assume Volcanic Range fucked them up. —anyway, I'll show you how to do that later, Hye-jin, but there's a way for you to materialise some basic clothes from storage if you want."

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"Oh. I didn't."

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"Oh it would have fucked up my chip, wouldn't it. Damn. But yeah, basic clothes that fit me would be great."

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"What size are you?" he asks at the same time as he presses a button on his commscreen that materialises two little cubes approximately 10cm to a side with circular apertures on top.

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Tae-gun walks over to Woo-young and puts his right index in the cube. He doesn't flinch, but when he pulls his finger out there's a small bleeding incision there.

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Yep, she too can get the finger prick while she takes a moment to convert her size into Korean sizes. Look, she's used to using Japanese sizing, okay, it'll take her a bit. But: yes, she remembers.

"How highly should I prioritize making an emergency stash to keep here?" wonders Hye-jin, a little awkwardly. "I - am making no assumptions about our siloing situation going forward."

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Right.

"You can do that if you want," he says, choosing this moment to switch from browsing the news on his phone to browsing the news on his commscreen. That's a reason for him to not look at her that is not embarrassing.

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...Woo-young wants popcorn.

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"Right. Well. One emergency stash for you, one for me, I guess? Your emergency stash would be in my secret underground silo when it's done, my house is objectively compromised even if I can't stand to sell it because of my emotional attachment, and I'm assuming your side of the split silo has stuff for you."

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"Yeah. It, it does."

Gosh what interesting news.

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The things Tae-gun-hyung gets embarrassed by (discussing bringing clothes over to each other's silos) and the ones he doesn't (being naked in front of Woo-young and Hye-jin) are a source of endless fascination to Woo-young.

Anyway! Since Hye-jin has her own commscreen already Woo-young can show her the place on the internal Quasar app where she can request various items on storage. It's organised by a tiered permissions system, and Hye-jin has permissions for various amenity items—such clothes, toiletries, and the like—melee weapons, OTC meds, an emergency phone, a world map as well as maps of various cities in Korea plus bigger cities elsewhere, and so on.

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Huh. Neat! Anyway yeah she'll get clothes, and then immediately flee to the bathroom to go put them on. They're a little bland for her taste, but such is the way of these things. She is both more warm and more decent! Hooray! She will have coffee in celebration.

"So, uh. Who wants to watch movies? Tae-gun in the middle to deal with backlash?"

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"Oh I'm down," he says, picking up his phone to message Tae-hwan to invite him over—

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—he drops his phone and looks down at it and starts crying again. Quietly, this time, no sobbing, but just. 

He doesn't remember the last time he watched a movie without Tae-hwan, and every time he did he'd always have invited Tae-hwan over, and now he can't, anymore.

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...Tae-gun wraps an arm around Woo-young and pulls Woo-young's head to rest on his shoulder.

Woo-young asked them to not make a big deal of it when this inevitably happened, though, so he says, "Yeah, sounds good to me too."

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She nods, gives Woo-young a quick hug, then heads over to see about picking out a movie. Of some kind.

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And Tae-gun pushes his chair to the living room and picks him up then gently places him on the sofa.

"The news still doesn't know what happened. Quasar hasn't been bugging me about it but it might be good to give them any update," Tae-gun says as he settles down on the sofa, himself.

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"Oh. Yeah, I gave my explanation to you two, I didn't put it in any kind of official report." She perches next to Tae-gun's clear and obvious sitting location, then begins typing something out. "I'll, uh. Start working on that."

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"It's honestly fine if you don't," says Woo-young, trying to keep his voice level. "Want to write a whole report, that is. They're not gonna bug you about it until you want to be."

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Well Tae-gun would feel kinda guilty but Woo-young isn't wrong.

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"I do think it's important to relate specifics of how Volcanic Range was weak to something that no one thought it would be, in case some of the other major dungeons have something similar going on? More accurate data on strange edge cases is really valuable for the future. ... I might elide over my regeneration though, now that you mention it. Call it more immunity to fire than I was expecting, or something."

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"They won't keep anything on file you don't want them to but yeah if you don't want anyone to know it's safer to just not mention it anywhere." He's very much thinking of Kang Jaeha, here.

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Tae-gun's thoughts start to veer in that direction when Woo-young mentions safety and then he immediately shuts them down. He'll let Hye-jin and Woo-young worry about that kind of stuff, he doesn't want to go there except with a lot of emotional prep in advance.

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Yep. Fortunately she has a lot of practice writing out reports, and even an S-rank dungeon that went incredibly off the rails isn't all that different. In an impressive amount of time, she has a (mostly) accurate report explaining what happened, with a specification that she turned out to be way more resistant to heat and fire damage than she'd been expecting, and gently leaving the part where she and Tae-gun fucked each others brains out for hours to the tasteful imagination of the reader. Blip. Sent.

"Okay, now movie time. Sorry about the delay."

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Tae-gun and Woo-young have been snuggling in companionable silence while Tae-gun scrolled through more news, other dungeon notifications, and the employee chat. He waves the commscreen away and looks up at Hye-jin when she's done, though, and smiles.

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"So, what kinds of movies do you guys like to watch?" He's not going to think too hard about the question he's asking because the associations are too close. He's not answering it, himself.

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"Mmm, depends a bit on my mood. I lean sci-fi today I think."

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"Yeah, sounds alright."

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Getting an actual opinion out of hyung will be completely impossible so Woo-young is just not going to try. Instead he's going to commandeer the TV remote to start scrolling through movies available on relevant streaming services—

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Woo-young's phone rings.

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He pulls it out of his pocket, looks at the caller ID, and groans.

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"Hm?" She leans over and looks, then makes a face. The Quasar guild president. Blah.

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"Do you want privacy?"

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"No, it's fine, just give me a minute." He picks up. "Hey, prez."

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Woo-young's phone's volume isn't impossibly low, and Hye-jin is able to make out the audio perfectly well.

"Hey, Woo-young. How... are you doing?"

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"...right. Stupid question. Uh... I assume you're at Tae-gun's?"

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"Yep."

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"Good. I'm..." He seems to struggle for how to continue that sentence for a few seconds.

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Yeah.

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"I'm sorry for your loss," he settles on. "I, I don't have the words. Please let me know if you need anything?"

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"I need a raise."

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"You're honestly overdue one."

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"...that was a joke."

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"I, look, Woo-young, you know you're important, too, right? You keep running around all over the place taking care of other people. Take care of yourself, too. And let the people who love you take care of you."

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"Yeah."

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"Right. I'll stop intruding on your time. I'm here for you if you ever need anything. Please rest, and don't... don't worry about the, about everything on our side, here. We'll deal with it. Take as much time as you need, and don't feel—don't make yourself hurt out of a feeling of obligation. You're a person, you matter just as much as anyone, you're not just what you can do for others."

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"...prez, it's a confluence."

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"Fuck the confluence!" he explodes, then takes a deep breath. "Sorry. Just, if you want me to come up with pragmatic reasons I will but you know what I mean. I know what you're like, and I don't, I don't want you to, to do the hunny gunny thing of putting yourself through a wringer because of your duty or, or for the good of others. It's okay to put yourself first, sometimes. It's okay to need time to heal, it's okay to take time to heal. You're allowed to be selfish. Okay?"

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...goddamnit. He's choking up again.

"Okay," he says in a small voice.

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"Alright. Okay. Uh, yeah. ...tell hunny gunny I said hi."

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He nods, which is the stupidest response because prez can't see, but actually he doesn't think he can say words right now.

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"Right. I'll, uh, see you later."

He hangs up.

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Tae-gun squeezes Woo-young's shoulder.

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That.

... Was not what she was expecting from him, to be honest.

"Well. Good. You should have some time off," she says, to fill the silence. Because all of her other thoughts make this about her and her damage, and now is not the time for that.

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He swallows and licks his lips and tries to find his voice again.

"I'm, I'm one of, I—"

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"Woo-young-ah."

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He stops.

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"...I'm not you and I don't know how to come up with the stuff you'd be telling me, if our places were swapped. Not as well as you would. But there's one thing I know, and it's that—there's damage you can't undo. So..." How does he phrase this. He really, really doesn't know how Woo-young comes up with the things he says. "I just mean that it's, if you treat yourself like a tool to be used then, and you, I mean." God the hypocrisy is not helping him figure out the right words. "Tools need maintenance too, sometimes, or they'll break? ...not, not that you're broken, that's not—" Amazing job, there, Lee Tae-gun, you're so good at this whole communicating thing.

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"... You did a rescue dungeon with another guild, Woo-young." She's still in the guild chat, and yep, she reads it. "Yes, the confluence and all, and this is when we all tighten our belts and eat a lot of backlash and whatnot, but - efficiency wise. That's not a good leverage of your power right now, when logistics are at a premium, and you know it. Sunbae's right, that's not taking care of yourself at all, and I think treating yourself like a machine to be efficiently leveraged is going to make your decision-making even worse."

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"I don't need to make decisions. Just, boop, teleport rescue, done."

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"...oh, so that's what that sounds like from the outside."

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"...what?"

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"When you're making a shit argument you know is shit to self-flagellate because you can't ever consider yourself a real human being."

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He sporfles and starts coughing and giggling at the same time.

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"This is honestly probably so good for his self awareness," she reaffirms, amused. "But don't be like him, he's a mess."

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"Such a mess." He sniffles. "Such a dumbass."

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"You know, it's no wonder I don't have any other friends, I get everything I need from just one: the verbal abuse, the insults, the contempt..."

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"Don't forget the mockery and humiliation!" he chirps, mussing up Tae-gun's hair.

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... wow, uh, she was not expecting implications about not being Tae-gun's friend! She also wasn't expecting it to hurt this much! Ow.

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...he notices.

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For a wonder, so does he. "Um. Sorry, I didn't—I'm just really used to. Saying that. I think we're probably friends, I just never thought about it. Um."

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"It's fine, we don't need to be friends. We're partners, professional relationship, it's different." Ow ow ow ow ow why does she now kind of want to cry.

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"No," he says, with... quite a lot more force than he'd expected to.

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"...I mean, I. You. You know the reasons why, now," he continues, more subdued, looking down at his lap. "Why I. The. Professionalism. Thing, it was—it doesn't matter. I didn't, I've. I don't want just—" Then he looks back up at her. "I mean if you want to just be strictly professional that's fine—!"

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"Should I leave...?"

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"Please don't I'm digging my own grave I need help."

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Snort. Okay, that helps. And the firm 'No' sent butterflies to her stomach. "Don't worry, you haven't gotten far. We can officially be friends, yeah."

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"Ohgood," he breathes, and he—should probably examine why exactly he reacted the way he just did. And for that matter why he dove into lava for her with no expectation of surviving doing that. And he might need Woo-young's help with that or he might need Woo-young to not be anywhere near him to be able to think about it he's not sure.

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"Do you want us to get a movie going so you don't have to think about any things anymore, hyung?"

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"Yesplease." Thank you Woo-young-ah you're the best Woo-young-ah no one could have a better friend Woo-young-ah.

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He smiles to himself and resumes looking over movies. At least he doesn't have any strong associations with sci-fi, even though he'd probably still prefer it if Hye-jin supplied some opinions.

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She can have opinions, yeah!


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Tae-gun has a problem.

The problem that Tae-gun has is that he had a conversation he'd been about to have with Hye-jin that got interrupted by a suddenly-appearing Woo-young—not that he's holding it against Woo-young, obviously, he'd be a colossal asshole not to mention a piece of shit friend if he did—and it really seems like they need to figure out what their relationship is going to be like, going forward, because all of the terms they set out with at the very start have been broken and he's clearly in need of some self-reflection except that sounds terrifying and he hasn't done any in five years and it was going fine and also he can't do any of that because Woo-young is still at his place—again, not holding it against Woo-young, if Woo-young tried to leave Tae-gun would handcuff him to the center table—and also that means he hasn't had any more sex with Hye-jin which he's mostly thinking about from a practical perspective of she is still backlashing, even if somewhat less actively, but that's still not great

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He and Hye-jin both receive an emergency warning and a request for immediate support simultaneously, in the middle of the afternoon.

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...his immediate thought is that he can't leave his best friend all alone now of all times, and the part of him that was panicking a little about not being a good friend feels no small measure of relief, and the rest of him thinks he kind of sucks as a person for having this entire makeup of feelings and thoughts all at the same time.

Tae-gun perhaps has as many as several simultaneous, compounding, and self-reinforcing problems.

He's working on them. Kind of.

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Ack. Okay. Uh. How bad is the emergency warning, and how much do they need the two of them in particular? Because: backlashing. If it's another S-rank, then she has concerns, back to back S-ranks is how you kill espers, and she got close enough to that yesterday, thanks.

"... If we go I'm absolutely going to need to swing by the split silo and pick up some stuff first," she says, before anything else, because: backlashing. Hers kills.

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Unknown rank, not a very large portal, but it's a dungeon break and it's spewing a concerning number of monsters into a populated area. They are not personally needed, but it's the kind of situation that could be dealt with by ten to fifteen B-ranks or the two of them.

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...those B-ranks...

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"Hyung, you're making that face you make when you're about to waste time fretting. I would suggest skipping straight to the inevitable part where you go be a big damn hero."

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Ugh. Yeah, he knows. "I'll go put some clothes on," he tells Hye-jin, rather than, yeah, wasting time fretting and arguing.

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Yeah. B ranks are often more valuable spread out or allowed to be specialized, instead of used as a blunt force object in great numbers, and a group of ten to fifteen will take longer to get organized than the two of them. They can just teleport down and squash the monsters flat. She nods.

"Okay. Then I'll meet you there," she says, then pauses to look at Woo-young. It would probably be patronizing to ask him if he'll be okay, or to tell him that they'll be back soon - he's Quasar's teleport esper, he probably knows usual mission times better than she does, so. She'll just give him a hug before she goes off to her silo. She needs hotpacks, practical shoes that are broken in, and maybe an extra fuzzy sweater.

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Tae-gun stands up, looks conflicted for a second, but rushes away when he catches Woo-young's look.

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And then he's back downstairs. "Are you—"

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"Hyung, for the love of—just go."

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Yeah. Right. Alright. He goes.

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Sigh.

Well, now he has to figure out what to do with himself. He still can't walk, and he doesn't have Tae-hwan to help—

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He lights a cigarette and tries not to think about it.

About him.


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The dungeon they got called to opened in Seoul itself, and there are various non-esper staff as well as a couple of B-ranks already on site when they arrive trying to contain the worst of the damage before Tae-gun and Hye-jin got there.

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Alright, what kinds of monsters are these, then?

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They're translucent slimes with glowing cores, and like most slime monsters trying to just straightforwardly destroy their cores causes them to split, and they occasionally clump together to form a bigger slime. They're also a lot faster than it seems like they should be, as rather than sliding along the floor they roll like wheels. The slimes bigger than people try to absorb them whole, the ones that are smaller try to get attached to them.

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Are they perhaps vulnerable to being boiled alive? Yes? Awesome. She will clean up the large packs of little ones and leave the careful precision work to her partner and try to carefully toe the line between efficiency of handling this crisis, and efficiency of not racking up too much backlash when she's already still kind of hurting on that front.

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The boiling alive will definitely need to be their tool du jour for actually killing them because it's just a lot more efficient than Tae-gun's freezing. He's definitely going to have to multitask because the slimes are spreading out pretty fast but most of his attention is going to be focused on cutting any people trapped in slimes out and then detaching any that are currently chomping via careful precise applications of ice surfaces. He jumps onto his hoverboard and starts from the outside in, trying to make sure the slimes that got the farthest away are dealt with before advancing.

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The support staff is also working on setting up a perimeter around the portal to that it can be dealt with once the monsters have been eliminated and contained, and while the fact that the dungeon is actively spewing them out means that people are mostly smart enough to stay away, there are still some gawkers and people who feel like they're sufficiently safe to take pictures and videos. And there are the conversations, everywhere...

 

                                   "Is that Kim Hye-jin?"

      "It is! The red hair!"

              "I liked her more naked."

          "Did you see Lee Tae-gun?"

"You know what they say about slim men..."

              "He wasn't that slim either."

     "Perv."

              "I was talking about his shoulders!"

                    "Espers really have it all, don't they? Looks, power, pretty men smiling at them..."

"Big tits."

          "Those, too."

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Tae-gun is perfectly used to people being horny on main about him, especially since they always assume he only has regular human hearing and say more things than they would if they knew he could hear them. He is... somewhat less used to people doing so in full knowledge of what he looks like naked.

That's probably going to be the new normal, isn't it.

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Hye-jin's less used to people objectifying her quite this much. Usually the parasocial relationship was a bit more focused on her being an adorable perfectly untouched Good Girl (tm), which: definitely did get her horny fans, but. ... Talking about the size of her tits. In earshot. Like she’s a piece of meat. That’s a bit new. Sort of similar to what she’s used to, but fundamentally different, too. She doesn't know how she feels about it besides not liking it.

Wait, no, hold on. Now that she thinks about it, she knows what she feels. Angry. She's angry. But not about the tits comments, she's angry about these people being stupid. This is an active danger zone! These dumbasses are going to use up very valuable esper time and energy (namely: hers and Tae-gun's, when they're both backlashing more than usual) needing to be fucking saved, because they put themselves into danger ogling people who are trying to do their damn jobs and save lives. During a confluence! The fuckers!!

"Please evacuate the area for your own safety, this is an active dungeon break!" she yells, instead of telling them all to fuck off. That would only encourage them.

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It's fiiiiiiine, they're fine, Lee Tae-gun and Kim Hye-jin will help if anything goes wrong.

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...you know what, Hye-jin has a point.

Tae-gun will start summoning ice walls between people and the dungeon break area, trying to do some active crowd control where he can spare the attention and help the support staff trying to keep everyone away as much as he can.

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The support staff is simultaneously grateful and incredibly irked. Why are people like this!!! They shouldn't be taking so much esper time and attention!!!!!! Not that they'll say that, of course, they're much too professional, and also they're used to dealing with spectators wanting to ogle dungeons on the regular, but. Ugh.

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Yes ma'am he knows the slime chomping on you hurt ma'am but that's what you get for not staying away ma'am please go ma'am.

Ma'am.

Sigh.

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Yeah. Ugh. People. She likes them for the most part, but sometimes? They make it so hard. She will give the support staff grateful smiles and focus on making their lives easier over catering towards any of the idiots wasting everyone's time and attention. No conversations, shoo, she's working. (She's slightly more polite than that, but. ... Only slightly.)

Anyway yes back to their starter JRPG quest of killing slimes. (Heh. And they even have the dumb NPCs...) They will do it so well and even the stupid NPCs people will live.

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Honestly, they could do this in their sleep. If they weren't still not really recovered from yesterday's backlash, they'd barely notice the strain. They'll be methodical and professional, Tae-gun will close the perimeter and Hye-jin will kill their starter quest monsters and they'll manage to contain the threat in short order, and find themselves behind the yellow tape.

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The dungeon does not seem to particularly care that they think the threat is "contained" and is happy to keep spewing more slimes.

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Is it trying to play attrition with them? Is that its game?

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Apparently. And it's a game it is definitely losing. They can sit perched next to the dungeon entrance on one of Tae-gun's ice hoverboards and Hye-jin can incinerate them as they come out, and. ... There are cameras, because of course there are, but they can hold hands anyway. If he's okay with it?

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At this point? The ship's sailed. There were already rumours that the two of them were banging like screen doors in a hurricane, is there even any point in trying to hold onto a semblance of propriety? ...also holding hands isn't that big a deal, Lee Tae-gun, why are you thinking about propriety???

(It's because he wants to jump Hye-jin's bones and being next to her makes him want it more, duh.)

He can keep a public face while they hold hands and wait for everything to get set up so they can go in and kill the dungeon. A couple of support espers to hold the fort outside, a medical team (more necessary than ever in a slime dungeon, if even a drop of these pests escapes it can be a nightmare to track down), as soon as that's all set up they can go rain fiery and icy wrath on their foes.

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Yep. They will politely wait here, keeping their backlash to a minimum, while everyone else gets things sorted. They'll probably need to escort a sensor in to make sure the dungeon doesn't have anything weird, but Hye-jin suspects this is one of those dungeons that isn't going to get the chance to get a proper classification before it's closed. Because, well. They're here and going to squash it.

It goes exactly as expected, and is squashed accordingly.

"I'm good to head back to your silo whenever, I packed an overnight bag," she informs her partner in an undertone once that's all neatly wrapped up. What? She's efficient, okay, and teleports are now extremely precious resources! She basically cleaned out her silo of all of her personal items and stuffed them in a backpack.

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"Yeah." He offers her a hand and summons the commscreen. "Ready?"

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She takes his hand. "Ready."

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Vworp.

She is now being pressed against a wall and kissed desperately.

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!!! Hye-jin was not expecting this, actually!

She's not complaining, and is in fact really into it, but. She does make a little surprised sound before she turns to putty under his hands (and lips). This isn't an unwilling woman, though, not with her arms wrapped around his neck like that.

"W-we, um, there's - Woo-young," she murmurs, when she needs to come up for air.

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Literally who.

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—oh.

Fuck. Right.

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He pulls away and looks around.

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No sign of the man, but there's a little note on Tae-gun's center table under the remote.

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...he fetches it via careful applications of dry ice and then plucks it out of his improvised ice pincers so that both he and Hye-jin can read it.

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I know you're going to fret, so please instead don't. I'm fine. Went out to get shitfaced with other people. Enjoy your time together.

- MWY

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"..... no further objections," says Hye-jin, blushing.

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Thank you Woo-young-ah you're the best Woo-young-ah no one could have a better friend Woo-young-ah.

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That prayer out of the way, he has some unfinished business with his partner.

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Whimper!

Yep, he sure does! This is going to the expected places way, way faster than it had with her last partner! Fuck it's hot to be wanted this much.

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He wants to crowd out every memory of her shitty ex and wants her to crowd out every memory of his shitty ex.

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(That is a lie. He is lying. He wishes it was true, but it's not.)

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He wants to, at least, get her to reasonable levels of backlash. That much is perfectly achievable by fucking her brains out. He's not sure they'll get to his bed by the first time he comes but a hidden perk of his backlash is that he basically does not have a refractory period while backlashing so he can just keep fucking her. He wants her to be exhausted and sore everywhere and for her to remember him and his face and his mouth and his tongue and his fingers and his cock every time she feels a twitch in her muscles. He wants to mark her, wants to bite her and leave bruises. He may be talked down from this, it won't even be hard, but it will be necessary, because that's where he's going, otherwise.

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So, on one hand, there's a slight issue with physically marking her: she has regeneration! Whatever marks he makes will disappear pretty quickly.

On the other hand: she turns out to be really into it!!

No attempts to talk him down are necessary, or made. ... Actually she kind of eggs him on. Look this is fun, okay, he's her second sexual partner in her life and he's really making it clear she was missing out!!!

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She's his...

...

...okay he's lost count of number of sexual partners but most of them were men, she's his third woman he thinks (he's not totally sure, the time he manifested was a blur). The thing about sex though is that if you're really into it and really into your partner being really into it (and you've read up at least a bit to expand your creative horizons) you'll figure it out. And when he's in the depth of backlash like this, all of his embarrassment goes out the window, so he's just going to be trying things and asking questions and figuring out how to get her more exhausted than right after a dungeon.

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Squeak.

Sounds good to her.


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Jaeha's got four screens floating in front of his eyes keeping track of different things and is on his third mug of coffee this afternoon. One of the screens is showing the area surrounding the dungeon live, and the team he's assembled* is getting ready to go in and rescue Tae-gun when the portal's edges suddenly turn green and his knees almost give out.

 

* It was not, mostly, assembled by him. It was, however, assembled by him in larger part than anyone other than himself knows, and it was assembled a lot more quickly than it otherwise would have been. There's a very real sense in which that team would not be there now if it weren't for him.

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He maximises that window and puts his coffee mug down and stares at it while holding the corners of the kitchen counter hard enough to turn his knuckles white and the edges of his vision black.

He's alive. He's alive. He's alive he's alive he's alive Tae-gun is alive. Jaeha knew it. He was right. He was right. He was right all along, Tae-gun is alive, of course Tae-gun is alive, it's not some measly fire dungeon that's going to kill Tae-gun, and it's not because of some random fire esper that he's going to die. Tae-gun is alive, Tae-gun is alive, Tae-gun found the dungeon's core and killed the dungeon and he's about to step through the portal, looking as stunning as he always does, not a hair out of place, like singlehandedly destroying Volcanic Range were just Tuesday for him, because it is, because he's Lee Tae-gun

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Tae-gun doesn't, however, immediately step out. No one does. Jaeha's screen doesn't have the audio turned on, but it's clear that the staff surrounding the portal are looking extremely alarmed by this development. People are running back and forth between different groups to consult and opening comms and taking calls and trying to figure out what the fuck just happened.

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It's obvious what just happened. Jaeha was a fool, an enormous fool, of course he didn't need to rescue Tae-gun, he should've believed in Tae-gun, should've trusted him, should've had faith, he's Lee Tae-gun, no one needs to rescue Lee Tae-gun, Lee Tae-gun is the one who rescues other people, he's always alright, he's always fine, no matter what happens Tae-gun will always be there, the world is alright, the world makes sense, Tae-gun is alive Tae-gun is alive!!!!!!!

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Time continues to pass. Lee Tae-gun continues not to step through the portal.

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That's fine. Jaeha has learned his lesson. He is going to believe in Lee Tae-gun. Giving in to despair was a mistake, and it's a mistake he's not going to repeat. Tae-gun is alive. Tae-gun is alive Tae-gun is alive Tae-gun is alive Tae-gun is alive alive alive alive alive!!!!!!!!

He really is starting to feel lightheaded. It's probably the way he's tensing up so badly he's actually not breathing enough. Focus, Kang Jaeha. Tae-gun is alive. Lee Tae-gun is alive, he's fine, and you can just—go back to your life as it was. Your plans continue unimpeded. This was a blip, confluences are scary, but Lee Tae-gun will not die to a dungeon. He slowly relaxes his fingers and leans forward, letting out a long breath and taking in a deep one.

(Tae-gun is alive. Tae-gun is alive. Tae-gun is alive, he's alive, he's alive, he really is, he's alive—)

He grabs his mug of coffee again. The world is alright. The world makes sense.

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The first person out of the portal is... not Tae-gun. You can tell by the head of brilliant red hair, stature, and, well. The pair of tits that are just barely hidden behind an ice blur.

She's holding hands with him though.

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And when Tae-gun steps out after her, he doesn't look stunning as he usually does. His hair is disheveled, he's wearing nothing but some uncomfortable-looking briefs made of ice that are almost insulting in how little they leave to the imagination, his face is flushed, and the beautiful and perfect smile he usually bears in public has been replaced by a look Jaeha has only seen on Tae-gun in their bedroom, when Tae-gun was in the throes of backlash.

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The coffee mug shatters in Jaeha's hand.

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The support staff takes a frankly (and quite literally) obscene amount of time to get its shit together, cover the two espers, and bring them out of the public eye and into one of the medical tents, but by then it's too late. That vision, that moment will be registered forever in the historical record, the two espers stepping out of an S-rank dungeon they just destroyed together, holding hands and clearly actively backlashing.

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Everything had been working fine. Everything had been going according to plan. Tae-gun wasn't getting any good partners, Jaeha made sure of that. Jaeha isn't getting any good partners, he's also made sure of that; his compatibility with Insoo is very asymmetrical, though Jaeha pretends it isn't, because Jaeha doesn't want anyone else. There's only Tae-gun. He drove other people away, subtly, found other partners for them, pulled strings no one could track.

It was never meant to kill Tae-gun. Another couple of years, that's all Jaeha needed. Another couple of years, and Tae-gun was going to be his again. Tae-gun would remember how much he needs Jaeha, how much Jaeha needs him, how much they need each other. How much they love each other. They'd be together again, and Tae-gun would remember how good it was when they were together.

He knows Tae-gun loved him, and he knows Tae-gun still loves him. He knows this, because he knows Tae-gun better than anyone, better than Tae-gun himself. It was working, it was going to work. They'd be together again, and he'd finally be whole again. There is no Kang Jaeha without Lee Tae-gun, and he was going to have Tae-gun again.

And now this bitch, this bitch shows up and fucks it all up. How much more time did she add to that timeline, with this little stunt of hers? How much longer is she going to make Jaeha have to wait before he can have Tae-gun again?

He knew, when he met her, when he took her measure, that he was going to need to destroy her. From the start it was obvious that she was a threat that wouldn't go away on its own, that he'd need to take action; the question was just which action to take, and it became very soon clear that destruction was the only option. But now he wants it for its own sake. Now, he wants her gone for himself.


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"So..."

It's far too late at night for them to be having dinner but they unsurprisingly lost track of time, and they're espers and need to eat to sustain their dissolute lifestyles high caloric consumption.

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Fortunately, Tae-gun has actually quite a lot of ready to eat food at his place, so: nom nom nom.

"So?" she asks, looking up from stuffing her face.

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"We kind of... I mean, all of the rules. That I said. When we met. They're kind of out the window, now."

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"Oh. Yes. They are. You're right, we should make new ones. Uh - okay, what do you want from our partnership now that we've, uh. Done the expected mutual guiding thing?"

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"I don't... really know. Um. I mean, the thing I said earlier. About how... you now know. The reason for the, the professionalism thing. Not wanting to get closer. It was to, um. Protect myself." Okay he is actually going to award himself a non-ironic good job star in his brain for succeeding at being emotionally vulnerable like that.

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"But I don't think I need to protect myself from you, anymore?"

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She beams at him. "Aw. Well, thank you. Though I still absolutely want to respect your boundaries? So. Please tell me things I should avoid for your comfort."

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"Yeah. Sure. I just don't really... know..." He can't really think about the time with—him—to draw inspiration from, because he doesn't know how much of it was actually okay. He's going to need to figure it all out again on the go. "...probably everything we did today and yesterday is fine. Um. If you're okay with the, um, the way I was. Being. Not, um, I, if I, I also want to respect your boundaries? But I'm, um, I'm bad at. That. When I'm. Um."

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Now it's her turn to stammer and blush.

"Um, n-no complaints, and, um. You seemed pretty, um. Open to whatever I wanted and, and, actively interested in what I wanted and enjoyed? Plus I can actually just, I mean. Set you on fire. If you're doing something I don't like." Cough.

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"But also I think my boundaries are more directed at stuff that you might do when you're not backlashing. Like - I had to fight like hell for my IUD, if you wanted that gone, that's not happening? But I expect you to go, 'Oh, that's smart, good thinking,' instead, so."

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"oh god I didn't even think of condoms yes absolutely good thinking"

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Sporfle.

"Probably the level of backlash I'm dealing with means that any of your little swimmers wouldn't get anywhere?" she snickers, amused. "But yes. I have been in this exact situation before, and good news! I solved it! ... I probably want to check with a medical professional that it didn't get partially melted or something, but. The string is still in there, I checked when I realized the thing about losing the chip."

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"Okay. Alright. Good. Um."

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"...who did you have to fight? Hideyoshi?"

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"Eventually? But mostly it was actually, uh. Japan. You know the statistics about espers running in families, yeah? Well. With the birthrate as it is..." She looks away and shrugs. "A young powerful esper with a stable male partner that she's dating..." She makes a face.

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"No. You are not serious. You cannot be serious."

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"'It's for the good of the country! Think of the next generation! You'd make a great mother!'" she parrots, clearly quoting from experience. "Nevermind that I'm a fucking combat esper, that should just go on the backburner for a decade or two while I boil water for a while and become a nice domestic housewife. ... That one's more Hideyoshi than the government, admittedly. When I complained about it to him, his response was, 'You know, maybe they have a point,' which. Um. Led to a massive argument and me throwing him out of my silo and our breakup." Food munch. "Ironically once I was certified single, it was much easier to get the paperwork through."

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"No. What? No." He is actually having some trouble fathoming this. "Did White Star Guild just... condone this?"

Wow he's actually getting pretty angry about it!

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"Ehhh. Yes and no? Not directly in so many words, but. Mysteriously I was being told that I was overreacting and to be patient and understanding and how, like, they would support me if I decided I wanted to take a break from the more dangerous aspects of being an esper, blah blah, blah blah, corporate speak. So. Basically yes."

His reaction is honestly very gratifying.

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"What the fuck!!! IUDs are removable and children aren't, you should not have a child by just happening to not be using contraception while fucking your partner! You should not have a child you don't actively and enthusiastically want!!!" He starting to pace and fume. "For the good of the country??? The familial correlation isn't even that strong!!!!! And if Japan is so fucking concerned about its birth rates it should maybe try to make living there less of a fucking nightmare!!!! And White Star Guild is meant to be protecting your interests, that is their point! And we need powerful combat espers right now a lot more than we need potential maybe-espers in twenty fucking years! And also it's your fucking life and your fucking body and they don't get to make you have a baby you don't want to have!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"What the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

He's actually starting to emit some icy mist around himself while he talks.

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"Yep, that was about my reaction. With more shouting, less ice, and literal fire."

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...less ice? Oh. Right. Away with the ice.

He stops at the kitchen counter to rest his weight on it, leaning forward and taking a few deep calming breaths. "Sorry. Sorry about that."

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"Honestly, your reaction is very gratifying, and brings me joy. If it helps, White Star is looking incredibly stupid right now. What with what we've been doing and how I am clearly doing great now that I'm away from them. I checked."

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"They should be! Losing you to Korea because of this? Because of that pile of turd? They deserve to crumble." Another deep breath, calm down, Lee Tae-gun. "...that would probably be bad for the world. Or something. But they should be looking like clowns, now."

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"Eh. I think it's important to the overall guild ecosystem for the shitty ones to experience consequences? For the good of the overall country and the world. But yes. They should look like clowns, and they do, and it's immensely satisfying."

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"I hope he's looking like a clown, too. I read some of the stuff he said after, uh." After they had that one conversation in which Hye-jin cried at him and he realised he didn't know anything about her. "Thinking he's hot shit, like you're the one missing out."

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"Oh, he looks like the biggest dumbass. The coward's been avoiding interviews even though he adores talking about himself. I think he's likely to be painted as 'the idiot who lost Japan an S-rank,' but. I haven't been keeping up with the news, obviously."

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"I guess it's presumptuous of me, to expect I'll be made S-rank, but." Volcanic Range is gone because of her, that's pretty hard to debate.

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"If you're not an S-rank I'm not an S-rank. Modus ponens to modus tollens..."

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Pause. "Uh, that's, uh, that's a maths thing, it means that since I am an S-rank you must be, too."

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Giggle. "Well, thank you."

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"The, uh. The media is now calling us the ice king and the fire queen," he says, it having occurred to him that she wouldn't know if she's not keeping up with the news.

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".... you know what, I'll take it over fire princess," muses Hye-jin. "Properly crowned queen instead of implications of being a spoiled brat, and all that."

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Oh. Yeah. Right. That. He'd been mostly thinking about it from the angle of "yet another way the media is boxing them into a couple mold" but that's also a thing, isn't it.

"I'm not entirely sure what to do about the whole... public image angle." Tae-gun has never been one of those espers whose official PR had a stance on the nature of his relationships with his partners, not even to the "do they kiss" level. Some espers go all in on it—Yoo-min and Seungjoo are known to be a couple—and others just leave it as various levels of subtext and playing to the Korean understanding of the kayfabe their celebrities do—Woo-young and Tae-hwan used to be one such case—but Tae-gun's never done the kayfabe thing at all and let people speculate to their hearts' content. Now, though? Everyone knows for a fact they're fucking, that they fucked while cavorting with monsters in an S-rank dungeon, and Tae-gun feels really conflicted about all of this. After all, Hye-jin herself is a big example of why one might want to not give the impression that they're dating their partner to the public.

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"Oh. I was going to ignore it and say our sex lives are none of their business? I honestly feel the whole... celebrity kayfabe from espers is incredibly fucked up. We're trying to save lives, not start a fanclub. It's like if people were expecting their local firemen to do the celebrity thing."

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"Oh no, I wasn't thinking that we'd—do anything like that. Just... I don't know." Maybe that's healthiest? Just not thinking about it? It does not feel entirely, uh, safe for him to just not care about his image but he's having some trouble articulating... why... "I wouldn't want there to be pressure on either of us again for, like, dating, or, if we go our separate ways have a ton of media about how we broke up or whatever, I guess is a thing." That's more concrete. "Back when—with him—it was pretty... low-key?"

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Nod. "That sounds nice. I think there's going to be pressure or - expectations - no matter what we do? But if it's just the media and not in Quasar then, you know, it's... not exactly fine, but I'm kind of used to it. Uh, we're not doing sexual exclusivity, right? I'm assuming not but that seems worth asking out loud."

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Blink.

Blink blink.

Blink blink blink.

"Uh. I've never thought about that."

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"Oh. Uh, well. You are my second sexual partner in my life, so, um. ... I honestly might experiment? I haven't even kissed another girl yet, it's tragic. And honestly any source of backlash reduction for you would be great, please do go acquire an extra partner or two if you're feeling up for it."

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"...I don't think I will." She can guess why. "But it's fine if you want to have sex with other people. —not that I really have any right to control that or, or tell you what to do. ...though I, uh, empirically am not going to be amazing about using protection so uh, um, be careful about, uh, I mean, you know?" Why is the word "STDs" so hard for him to say.

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"STDs?" questions Hye-jin, and then nods when he confirms this. "Yeah. I will. Though I'm not even sure if I will or not, I don't know how to, uh, go to a bar to pick up chicks or... whatever... just. I might want to." Probably not right now, because Jaeha exists! And probably hates her.

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"Woo-young knows how to. Pick up girls, I mean. At bars. ...now's probably not the best—"

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He gets a text.

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"—time?" What time even is it, why is Woo-young texting him in the middle of the night, did something happen—

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Another text! Another! Another! Another!

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Um?

He opens his commscreen to look at the texts.

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...he blushes horribly.

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(Another text!)

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"... Hm? I'm guessing everything's okay from that expression, but now I'm curious."

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"...aah."

But he'll share the texts.

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hey sunbe

sumbe

sumbae

i mean hyung

fukc

i thought i was used to it

anyway

i ws tlaking with yoo mi nhyung

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TAE-GUN

IGNORE EVERYTHING WOO-YOUNG IS SAYING

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he had a amazin gidea

amazing idea

an

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IT'S ALL LIES

I TRIED TO STOP HIM

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you and i could fcu

fcuk

have sex

like for backlash

youre hot btw

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I TRIED TO TAKE HIS PHONE AWAY FROM HIM

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wdyt?

hye-jin can join if sh ewants

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... Hye-jin giggles.

"Oh, he sounds very drunk.”

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like its eas ythat way right

i don't haveto think about

other people

and yuor dick is huge

yoo-min hyun agrees

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I HAVE NEVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THAT

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"why me"

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"You're very attractive! I understand the urge," she teases, amused.

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"All espers are attractive! We get, like, symmetrical and stuff!"

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hyun

hyung

are yuou asleep?

oh are you fcuing hye-jin?

thatr's legit i would too

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Woo-young-ah please listen to Yoo-min-sunbae and put your phone away.

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I AM SO SORRY

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ok but

ynm

?

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I am not having this conversation over text when you are this drunk.

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so thats a maybe

good enough

good night hyung

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And to Yoo-min:

You'll be forgiven once I think up a suitable punishment.

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oh shit you're like making jokes with me over text

omg omg omg

i feel so honured

...ok i may be a bit drunk too

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Giggle.

"Okay, yes, but you're also... it's not just the physically attractive part, but the way you carry yourself is attractive? We're all pretty, but not everyone carries themselves like they could, well. Jump into magic lava and survive to help kill the S-rank dungeon responsible. I get it!"

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...okay that's actually pretty flattering he's not sure how to respond um.

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So instead of trying to figure it out he'll text Seungjoo.

Seungjoo-sunbae, are you on top of whatever is going on with Yoo-min-sunbae and Woo-young?

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yeah

don't worry about it Tae-gun

I'll make sure they're fine

and you and I can brainstorm punishments for hyung together tomorrow ^-^

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...Choi Seungjoo-sunbae can be really scary sometimes.

He sighs and waves his screen away. "I guess that was apropos. Given Woo-young's feelings yesterday he'd probably want to actually talk about it but..." Tae-gun himself has some very complicated feelings about it but they're not altogether... negative?

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"Yeah. Um." Cough. "No thank you on directly joining in on, uh, whatever you decide to do there, I think I am not actually ready to jump the bones of literally all of my Korean friends, but." She shrugs. "Have fun if you decide to?"

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So no tag-teaming Tae-gun? Bad Lee Tae-gun. Bad! Down boy!

"I'll... keep you in the loop, I guess." It occurs to him that Woo-young is also very slightly compatible with both Yoo-min-sunbae and Seungjoo-sunbae but Tae-gun himself is a lot less comfortable having sex with either of them. Or, uh, letting either of them see him when he's—you know. "I don't want him to try to, uh. Self-harm by throwing himself into things too quickly. He was drunk but he was probably also thinking about how to get back to work as soon as possible regardless of what the guild president said, so..."

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"Yeah. Agreed. But I trust you to be careful with him."

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Tae-gun shrugs uncomfortably. "He's my best friend," he says, lamely. "And... the closest thing I have to family. So. I gotta."

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She smiles at him. "Yeah," she agrees, again.

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That smile. That fucking smile. It's the smile Kang Jaeha used to point at him. Like, like she thinks he's... something. Something good. Like, like she thinks he's someone who should be smiled at like that.

He hates that smile.

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...but he hates it a lot less, now, when it's her.


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Her partner has left her.

It's not really a surprise. They weren't the most compatible pair possible, and their guild has been bleeding members left and right for months. The latest scandalizing news out of Korea (technically Mexico, but involving Korea's espers) is just the final nail in a coffin that has by now been meticulously built. The confluence means that lots of espers that hadn't been intermingling are working together, and her (former) partner found someone who fit him better. Both compatibility wise and guild wise. He liked White Star well enough, but it's pretty clearly a sinking ship. Anyone sensible would be looking for possible exits. Her (former) partner even offered to look into guilds they could migrate to together, before the confluence hit. It was very sweet of him, but she turned him down.

Probably she shouldn't have. She liked him. He was - kind. Understanding. He didn't have to be, and she appreciates that he was anyway. If she were less sentimental or more practical or more brave or better at socializing or if she had a less standoffish demeanor probably she would be fine, would have either gone with him or found someone else already, but she's none of those things. She's just her, and she can't even figure out how to pick a name for herself, let alone decide to leave the guild that was very kind to her when it didn't have to be.

The family name is straightforward enough. She has no real issue with her parents - if they weren't understanding about their son turning out to be a daughter at first, well, they appreciate that their daughter is a well paid trauma therapy esper, and her awakening made her look so feminine they looked awkward or stupid if they called her by the wrong pronoun. They're fine now. Not good, but fine. (Besides, whispers what she knows is her backlash talking, if you had been better they would have been, too, if you'd realized before you awakened they could have braced for it, you could have seen their real reactions without the money and the facelift messing with their perceptions.) So - she'll be keeping it, for lack of a better idea. It's the personal name that's the trouble. She's been trying to figure it out for months, but there are just so many possible names. She was fully healed from her surgery a month ago, and White Star lined up the paperwork for the legal transition all ready to go, and she still can't pick a name.

(Typical, says the voice in her brain that is not supposed to be her but still feels like it, wasting everyone's time and attention and money, can't do anything for yourself even if you need to -)

She could probably pick a name if she had a partner to help with her backlash, why did he have to leave now?? But no, that's a lie, she couldn't pick something even before the confluence, or before he left during it, and now that he has she's exactly as she started but with more anxiety, what is wrong with her. No, bad, that's not a productive line of thought, if she were better she could manage to think even while she's like this. Why isn't she better, why can't she just be better...

Not useful. Do better.

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  "Fugimura-san?" someone asks.

She looks up. It's the woman who's been trying to set her up with a new partner. Miyata-san. She's also been trying to set Fugimura up for another guild so she won't be left in the lurch when White Star inevitably collapses. She's been incredibly nice.

"Yes?" she asks, kicking herself for not noticing her earlier. How dense can one woman be? Pay attention to the things happening around you!

  "A new potential partner opened up. His, um. Died."

"I am willing to meet with him to gauge compatibility," she says, immediately, because she can't stop doing her job now of all times, the longer patients go before she can get to them, the more entrenched their trauma will be. Emotional reactions lead to other emotional reactions lead to even more emotional mess to clean up, and it's better for everyone if she swoops in right after people are pulled out of a dungeon and she can just - make their terror go away. Then it barely affects their lives at all. (And dealing with backlash on her own is unpleasant.) She does not have the space to be picky, anymore.

  "I know, but he's, um. From Korea."

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".... Quasar?" she guesses, from the awkward look, and, well. It's the one guild in Korea that is still talking to White Star. It was not a hard guess.

  "Uh, yeah."

"... It's fine. I can still meet with him." She's not actually sure if it's fine, it's hard to pick out what her actual emotions are underneath the din of backlash, but probably this person will not be compatible and she will be back at square one. So. Might as well.

  "Okay. Um. Do you have a full name I could send over...?"

Koreans tend to focus on personal names over the familial. They will probably want to use her personal name. Miyata-san (and the rest of White Star, really) are all very concerned about avoiding 'dead naming' her, but she's not really sure why. Katsuo is fine as a name, and she used it for most of her life. It just is somewhat awkward with her obviously being a woman now. She doesn't flinch if it's used, but it confuses people. (And she really should pick a name already.)

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"... Fugimura Hana," she picks, at not-quite-random. It's one of the potential names she's been thinking about, but it felt too common and stereotypical and - whatever. It's fine. This is a good chance to test out to see if she finds it acceptable.

(Why couldn't she have picked a better name, and she definitely hasn't figured out the kanji for it, does that matter, are they going to send over the kanji, there are admittedly only two options but she's absolutely going to agonize over those two options for eternity, no they're Korean, it'll be in Korean, probably this is fine and she has time to try and figure out the kanji. If she likes the name. She's not sure yet. It's hard to tell.)

  Miyata-san beams and her and nods. "Pretty. I'll go make the offer for you."

Miyata-san probably doesn't mean that, but she's very nice and Fugimura (Hana) appreciates this immensely. She's not very good at smiling, but she gives a nod of gratitude and. .... Is going to go practice her Korean until the dungeon in Ota is fully cleared out. Then she'll have more work to do with everyone that's been rescued.


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Okay so, to get this out of the way: sex with Tae-gun-hyung is fantastic. It's not guided sex, for sure, and Woo-young does... break down crying in the middle of it occasionally... but then hyung holds him and pets him and waits for him to be okay, or he doesn't, when Woo-young asks him not to, which is sometimes exactly what he needs, is being stuffed so full with dick he can't have any thoughts. It's a bit awkward but they work through it and in the end it is amazing, hyung has a ton of experience (despite the five year gap in his resume) and approximately infinite stamina and Woo-young has wanted to go on a ride since they first met and he had a puppy celebrity crush on hyung and now he gets to. And when Yoo-min-sunbae asks for details he is coy and cryptic even though he knows hyung would be fine with sharing it because teasing sunbae is a lot of fun and clearly drives him up the wall and Woo-young is not okay and nothing is okay but at least he can brag to a friend about fucking Lee Tae-gun and that's one thing that's okay, actually.

But the thing is this isn't guided sex, or it's not very guided sex in any case. It helps, it definitely helps with the backlash, as does sleeping together afterwards (and it is kinda hot that hyung fucks Hye-jin then fucks him and then they sleep together in the same bed with hyung in the middle, plus it doesn't take a genius to figure out that hyung has at least a little bit of a kink for "being used" for someone else's benefit), but it doesn't really help... enough.

He needs a partner.

Prez is still blocking any and all unwanted external pressure though and he can look over partners at his leisure, which... he does appreciate, actually. He's not sure how he's going to feel about having proper guided sex with someone who isn't either of his best friends in the whole world (because one of them is dead and he's not sufficiently compatible with the other) but the rescues he's been doing (despite prez's protests) are causing a net positive backlash accumulation rate and he does in fact need to figure something out. Maybe just snuggling the new partner and fucking hyung will be enough? Depending on how compatible they are? ...even snuggling makes his heart tight but less tight, he thinks.

He thinks he might be able to do it. Maybe.

He'll at least look over his options.

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Here's one!

There are others, but this one stands out from the others by way of having an obviously Japanese name, and then continues to stand out from the rest once the details are read into.

She's from White Star, works in post-rescue trauma therapy, and is a mental esper. Any one of those might be notable, all of them together in one person? Well, it's very notable, is what it is.

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...huh yeah that is notable. Is her backlash on record? His is, so presumably the recommendations he's seeing have had some kind of advance filtering, but he's curious what she could have that'd match him, being a psychic esper and all.

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It's not.

But she's apparently willing to schedule a meeting to gauge compatibility, even with him all the way in another country, so someone's got to be pretty sure, probably.

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Well, that or she's desperate. White Star is crumbling, sort of—they'll be able to turn it around, if their leadership makes some smart, hard decisions they don't seem willing to make—so being willing to go really far is not necessarily that surprising. Plus, Woo-young's power is great for teleporting other people to predefined locations like that so Quasar is kind of liberal about teleporting people over to meet; they have a ton of it stored, and Woo-young doesn't expect he's going to be out of commission for long enough to justify them changing their expenditure patterns.

"What do you think?" he asks Tae-gun and Hye-jin, leaning over to them and moving his screen so they can read it.

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Of... a potential new partner. 

"Tired of my dick already?" he asks, dryly. By which he means, of course, "Are you sure you're ready to be looking for a new partner?"

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"I never said we were going to stop our little tête-à-têtes here."

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Hye-jin peers at the screen. "Fumigura...? Wait, she's from White Star. Huh. I knew it had a trauma esper, but we hadn't been personally acquainted, we moved in different spheres. She was out of commission for a while for a lot of surgeries? I'm not sure what for, but that's what I remember. I hope she's okay?" She doesn't comment on the 'should he be looking for a new partner' front, she's... not really sure how to. Much better to engage with the practical and let Tae-gun handle the complicated emotional bits.

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You know things are bad when you're having to rely on Tae-gun for complicated emotional bits.

"Woo-young-ah..."

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"Hyung, can we—"

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"Skip it? We can only skip it if we know what we're skipping and I don't."

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"...it's a confluence. And I'm still going to rescue people, and that's making my backlash backlog grow, and—"

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"Are you going to be okay?"

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"I don't know. I think I'm still going to need you. For at least a while. But this isn't sustainable either."

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He sticks his right little finger out. "Promise me you'll take care of yourself and listen to yourself and not do the hunny gunny self-sacrificial thing. There can only be one of me."

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He sporfles at "the hunny gunny thing" and, yes, ties his little finger with Tae-gun's. "Promise."

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He pulls Woo-young into a one-armed hug and gives him a noogie.

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Giggle. This is extremely cute.

(And, for the record, it's not that things are 'extremely bad,' exactly, though obviously they're not great, but. ... Hye-jin trusts Tae-gun to understand his best friend, actually.)

"When you're done tormenting him I'd like to give him a hug, please," says Hye-jin, from the other side of their backlash snuggle buddy. "Along with the plea to please take care of yourself."

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Hmmm... three more seconds of tormenting and then yes he can release Woo-young for hugs.

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Hehehe.

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Hye-jin patiently waits for her opening, then scoots over to hug him.

"You are thoughtful and kind and precious and deserve all the care you've given to everyone else, and certainly more than to be kindling for a self sacrificial pyre. And also I don't have many Korean friends, don't make this harder on me."

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"Awwwww I'm a friend!!" he says, wibbling in place a little.

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Snort!!!

"Yes! Was that in doubt? It should not be in doubt. I like you as a person and value your company!"

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Wibbles~

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Tae-gun rolls his eyes and pulls himself up to sit a bit straighter so he can look at the description of the potential new partner properly. "She's not a dungeon esper," he observes. "At least primarily. That's interesting."

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"No, she does - uh, after dungeon cleanup? If I'm remembering correctly?" She peers at the description. "Yeah, trauma counseling for rescued civilians. And she's a mental esper. ..... huh." That 'huh' is of someone who sees a potential place where, actually, a mind esper would be really really useful. Like Kang Jaeha. Like that. ... Also admittedly the trauma Tae-gun very obviously has, but she suspects that he's not going to go for that, what with the source of his trauma being another mind esper. Ahem.

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He is very loudly and clearly not hearing her thoughts, here. His mind is not going anywhere near that, thank you very much.

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Yeah. Yeah, he did notice that.

If his partner doesn't go into dungeons then—

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Oops, she had tactical thoughts that triggered the hangups in both available boys. This was in retrospect predictable. Fortunately, she knows how to counter this.

"Anyway, I choose to believe you were so charmed by me in particular that I've made every other person from Japan look better. That is clearly what's happening here, and I should be smug about it!"

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Well that does snap Woo-young out of the incipient funk by making him snort and hit her with a pillow.

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"I don't think that's how anything works," Tae-gun observes in a monotone that doesn't quite fit the small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

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"No? But I'm so charming!" she laughs, even as she's beaten by a pillow.

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Yeah, she kind of is.


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Woo-young decides to go ahead and schedule a meeting with Fugimura Hana. Waiting isn't going to help with anything, it'll just waste time, and—he doesn't need to rehash the arguments in his head. He knows them. It'll be fine. The fact that he'd been with Tae-hwan for four years and so has very little recent experience meeting new partners is immaterial.

(He's not replacing Tae-hwan. He's not. Not... in the ways that matter. This is only about practicalities.)

(He wasn't in love with Tae-hwan, but he did love Tae-hwan. It's hard to think about. He mostly tries not to.)

And now he... waits.

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His prospective partner arrives at precisely the appointed time. She is tall and willowy and coldly beautiful, with long and dark black hair and amber eyes that might remind him of someone in particular.

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He's sitting down—he's too backlashed to stand—so when she walks in he looks up at her and...

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...he doesn't get confused. Tae-hwan's hair was dark purple, it only looked black most of the time. His eyes were a different shade of amber. And though he was beautiful, he was never cold; he was always smiling, or smirking, or pouting, or rolling his eyes, or grinning, or frowning. It's a mistake to say he was easy to read because he was more like a TV show, no reading comprehension necessary, he was always one hundred percent what and who he was, for all the world to see. If he saw Woo-young like this, he'd scoff and make fun of him for just sitting there slack-jawed.

She really doesn't look like Tae-hwan at all, except for the small ways in which she could be his sister because she does look like him a little bit, and when she looks at Woo-young he does see Tae-hwan's eyes, for a moment.

His throat is too tight, right now, and he can't get a greeting out.

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This woman is definitely unreadable, and she bows in a way Tae-hwan never would.

"It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance," she says carefully, in accented but intelligible Korean. "I am Fumigura Hana."

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Right. He's here for a reason. He bows his head. "Likewise. I am Min Woo-young; apologies for not standing up, but I am currently not able to," he says, gesturing at the wheelchair he's in.

He's not sure he can do this. He has to, but he's not sure he can.

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She gives an expressionless nod, then steps forward and holds her hand out towards him to take.

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Right, then. That's the main thing they came here to do. He takes it.

Just how compatible are they?

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More compatible than he is with Tae-gun, but not as compatible as he'd been with Tae-hwan. Definitely compatible, though.

She looks... vaguely thoughtful? Probably? As she pulls away, and sits down.

"Does this meet the level of compatibility you're looking for in a partner?" she asks, as if the whole Japan and Korea thing are not involved at all.

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...yeah. Probably.

"Yes, I believe so. How about yours?"

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"In typical circumstances, yes. ... Though it depends on how Quasar is equipped to handle an international partnership. I am not currently prepared to move to Korea."

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"Are you... planning to join Quasar?"

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".... Probably," she sighs, sounding resigned.

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"I see." So they'll... need to be teleporting to guide each other.

"...tell me a bit about... yourself, I guess?" This was easier with Tae-hwan. Woo-young didn't even have to ask, Tae-hwan was blabbing about everything and nothing within three minutes of meeting him.

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"I'm twenty-two. I awakened five years ago, when I was seventeen. I've had four partners, all of which lasted for over six months." Which is somewhat odd, actually, usually the early ones end more quickly than that, but she doesn't explain further. "My power is emotional impressions, which I primarily use to help people with traumatic experiences. I'm currently working to get a degree in psychology and certification as a counselor."

It's sort of like she's reading a set of cue cards more than telling about herself.

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Yeah, it kind of is.

Can Woo-young even... improve on that, though. He's having a hard time mustering up any enthusiasm, and that's not... the best foot to start this partnership on...

Maybe it's for the best? Maybe it'll just be temporary, something to get him functional until he can get... a proper partner again...

How is he going to find a proper partner.

Maybe that's just too much to ask. Actually, it is too much to ask. He just lost Tae-hwan, one of his two favourite people in the world, and, and he's not getting Tae-hwan back, no matter what, but he, he's still.

"...I don't know how much you know about, um, the situation that... has led me to... not have a partner." Because, actually, he should just be straightforward and honest. Then if... if it is temporary, at least Fugimura Hana-shi won't have been working under any misapprehensions about it.

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"I am aware," she says, very quietly.

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"We were not... romantically involved, but..." He's no longer breaking down into sobs every time he thinks about Tae-hwan, at least. "He was my best friend," he says, lowering his gaze. "And—it sometimes seems like a technicality, to say we weren't dating. And now he's dead and—" Breathe. Breathe. "And you should know that. That I don't, I'm. That I don't know what I can offer. I'll, I'll try to make it work, but—we'd been partners for years. I, I'll probably have triggers I haven't even thought of, in addition to all of the triggers I have thought of. And I don't know if I could be—intimate—with a new person this quickly.

"So. That's where I'm at, right now."

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Nod.

 


"Mine left me," she replies, as if she's talking about the weather.

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Woo-young looks up at her, surprised by how he's not even tearing up, and tries to look—interested. He is interested, he's just... not feeling it. But he wants to know. Showing an interest and caring about his new partner's history is the least he can do.

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"He - stayed longer than he perhaps should have. I am... not very good... at this aspect of being an esper. The - personal connection aspect with one's partner."

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...the person she's reminding Woo-young of right now isn't Tae-hwan, anymore; it's hyung.

And she's lying.

Or, not exactly lying, but—she's doing the hunny gunny thing. One of the hunny gunny things, at any rate. 

"Well, we can... probably figure it out. What, um... do you usually like to do for backlash reduction?"

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".... Cuddling is usually very efficient for backlash reduction with minimal discomfort to both parties."

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It's definitely going to be more efficient than what he's been doing.

"...I have also... recently..." He breathes deeply, again. "You know of Lee Tae-gun? He's my... other... best friend. And we are very minorly compatible. He's been helping me with my backlash, and with... processing. Emotional, I mean. And we have been—having sex, recently. For backlash purposes." And a little bit because it feels nice, and a lot because of the human connection.

...he's not sure how to move on from that sentence. He'll wait for her reaction, he supposes.

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"... Okay?"

Yeah that's definitely confusion under that cold demeanor. She does not see why this is her business, why is he telling her???

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"...it just seems relevant, I suppose? If I'm doing more for my backlash than just cuddling you. And—so you know, about my other relationships and attachments, I guess. If we're going to be partners, we're going to be, at least for a while, part of each other's lives."

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"Oh. I am currently single and focusing on my career. I don't particularly have opinions on how you conduct your personal relationships. ... Um, except to be safe?" Awkward shrug.

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That makes him laugh, and the laugh makes him start giggling to himself.

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?????? okay?

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"Sorry, sorry," he says, getting the laughter under control. "It's just... I don't know. You reminded me of someone." 'Single and focusing on my career', yeah, that definitely rings a bell.

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"... A... good someone?" From context??? She guesses?????

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"Lee Tae-gun-hyung, specifically. So, yeah."

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"Oh."

She. Thinks she's supposed to smile here. Um. Smile?

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Oh they are literally the same person that's hilarious.

This did, actually, improve his mood, crazy as that sounds? He knows how to deal with hyung, and he might know how to deal with Fugimura Hana-shi. "I'm twenty-five, I also first manifested about six years ago, and I've been with Quasar since. I've had three partners, one for about three months, one for a year, and then Tae-hwan. My power is teleportation, and I'm a rescue esper. Quasar also has power batteries that have a very strong affinity with my power, and power controllers that have a very strong affinity with my power; they sell it to other guilds all over the world, too, so you might've used it.

"My backlash is loss of motor ability." He gestures again at the wheelchair. "Starting with my feet and going up. The backlash accumulation rate is abysmal.

"When it's not actively a confluence, I spend two to three days a week feeding the batteries rather than dungeoning, barring emergencies; during this confluence I of course am working as a rescue esper full time.

"I am happy to cuddle you, Fugimura Hana-shi."

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She listens attentively, and nods along.

"Then... we can probably make this partnership work? ... I would reciprocate with an explanation of my backlash, but I'd feel more comfortable doing that after the signing of an NDA. I was aware of your backlash but will not explain the specifics to anyone regardless."

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"Yeah, that's alright by me." He is really curious about what kind of backlash a psychic esper could have that matches his but it's probably powers' metaphors being bullshit again. "I'll sign it."

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Nod.

Then, after it is signed:

"My backlash is magnification of negative emotional agitation and especially anxiety. Self-doubt, overanalyzation, sometimes guilt and fear. If it gets too bad I give physiological symptoms as well; loss of fine motor skills, uncontrollable trembling, increased heart rate and blood pressure. In somes cases I can have panic attacks."

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Yeah it's metaphors going crazy. Something something motion something.

...but also.

He offers her a hand. "We'll figure it out. What do you want to do for siloing?"

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She looks at his hand for a few moments, then takes it.

"Um. I - have a number of clients in Japan I am obligated to continue assisting both contractually and as my main source of income, but it's ultimately not very backlash intensive? Post rescue operations is when I would need isolation. If - I sourced my patients through Quasar, in Korea, then siloing here would probably be best for us both."

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"—I'm afraid I'm not sure I understand what you mean by 'clients'."

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"Oh. My typical power use is in reducing or removing unwanted emotional reactions, either in real time or in someone's memories. This is most efficiently leveraged on rescues from dungeons; whatever the dungeon did to them, whatever fear or terror or violation it incited, I can unmake it. It's - best if this is done sooner rather than later, before the emotional habit is entrenched and life-affecting. I typically do this sort of work gratis, and source most of those clients through White Star, or associated guilds that regularly do rescues.

"Then there are people who have long term entrenched problems, addiction, unwanted guilt, anger, or other lingering negative emotions from more complicated sources. And those involve a lot of understanding and work with associated therapists and the client to figure out where best my power can be leveraged for their emotional health and wellbeing. A lot of that work isn't on the esper side, it's on the therapy side. So it's not very backlash heavy, comparatively."

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"...huh.

"That's really cool."

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Nod. Little smile.

"Thank you."

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"Do you have access to our intranet yet, by the way?" he asks, opening up his commscreen. "I'll show you to the internal app you can use to request specific siloing things if you want, so we can figure out what we'll have. I have specs for the kinds of accessibility aids I need already loaded up."

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"No, not yet. The main things are a weighted blanket, my medication, and origami paper, which are very straightforward."

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"I'll put in a preliminary request for those, then," he says, then does so. "Once you have access you can review it and we can submit the request."

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Nod.

"Okay. Thank you."

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"Let's exchange numbers, then? And, uh, I don't know what your schedule is looking like today, but..." He still can't walk and his guess is that she's under some amount of backlash, too.

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"I don't have anything planned. I can stay for a while, if you're comfortable with that."

And yeah, she is absolutely working under some backlash. She has been this entire time.

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He thought so.

"...do you like K-dramas?"

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"... I've never seen any. But they sound fine."

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"Then would you like to come watch some with me in a shared guild silo? Your pick of whether we start a new one or keep watching one I'm in the middle of, the latter may get confusing but it won't take forever to get to the actual plot."

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"New one, if that wouldn't be too much trouble?" she requests, a little shyly. "And, yes. That sounds good."

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Cool then once she says she's fine with it he can teleport both of them to an unoccupied silo room (after marking it occupied in the system so others won't come bother them) and grab some dorama he hasn't watched yet from his to-watch list to put it on.

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She turns out to enjoy them, actually. (And they're good practice for her Korean!)


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"Woo-young texted me. Says he's spending the evening with Fugimura Hana-shi and will only come over later to sleep with us."

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"Huh! I guess that means it's going well? Possibly?"

Is that a contemplative look on her? Well, maybe, but also it's not her fault Tae-gun apparently likes to prance around his house naked.

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"At least not badly," he agrees, waving his commscreen away.

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Then he notices her look and tilts his head inquisitively.

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This causes her to stammer. "I-I, well, I mean, if we have the place entirely to ourselves, we can, um...."

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...oh.

You know what, she's not wrong.

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She's definitely, definitely not wrong.

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Hey look, it's her smug little smile again, coming out to play. Is it a bit weird to go from awkwardly stammering to smirking at him? Maybe, but also she likes eliciting that reaction from him.

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Yeah, well. 

One of them is wearing clothes. Tae-gun wants to fix that immediately. If Hye-jin has and objections she has approximately 4.37s to voice them.

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No objections to speak of! Actually, she will be happy to experiment in the ways that taking off clothes can be fun.

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Here's one.

When he's pulling her top off, he doesn't. Instead, when it's around her wrists above her head, he quickly twists them into a knot so that her hands are tied together and then summons an icicle floating statically in the air to hold the impromptu handcuffs up.

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This elicits a little giggle.

"You know this won't hold me unless I let it, right?" she teases, but yes, she'll play along. This is a fun game. "Even my strength's enough to rip through my own clothes, not even accounting for fire."

(They have of course already tested which of them is stronger. It's him.)

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"I do, but if you do that I'll need to get even more creative, won't I?" he says, his lips barely an inch from her ear, close though for his breath to tickle. He then summons an ice thimble onto one of his fingers so he can trail them down the middle of her back while his lips trail down her front.

And if the ice holding her up starts sloooowly sliding further up so that Hye-jin will soon need to be standing on her tiptoes and tensing under his touch, that's just a bonus, really. It's the fun part of not being under strong, acute backlash, that he can plan ahead that far.

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There is an obvious reaction to that, and it is of course: "Hhh-aaaah!"

But she finds her words again soon enough. "Well, n-now I'm tempted to see what happens if I don't cooperate..."

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"Try it," he suggests to the crease of her groin as he pulls her pants off one leg at a time. And to serve as an incentive, here's another bit of ice, right behind the crease of her lower back, which she's going to need to be arching her back and hips forward to not touch. It's not melting, either, so it won't even leave cold water on her skin for her to get used to the temperature.

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"But I also want to see what happens if I do!!" she laughs, then decides being a little shit is more central to her nature as a person. She grabs the makeshift handcuffs with her hands to lift herself up irrespective of the cold, then wraps her legs around him and promptly destroys the thing holding her up, dumping all of her weight on him at once. Whee!

"Next time, maybe!" she says, cheerfully.

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Nah uh. Now it's not clothes holding her arms up anymore, it's pure ice. The ice doesn't feel cold, though, because he's messing with its specific heat; it's just solid. She could still melt it, of course, but her legs are wrapped around him and if he holds her up with both arms just so he can get his mouth somewhere very distracting. Maybe distracting enough that she won't think of it.

He promised he'd try to be creative, so he's not going to just give up the first time she thwarts his plans. They have the house to themselves, and quite a lot of time, if she wants to draw it out. Game on.


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They end up drawing it out for a while. Hye-jin is very snuggly, after.

"Mmmmm I'm going to have to go shopping for things for us to play with, aren't I," she mumbles into his skin. "Any requests?"

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"...things?"

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"Well, more sets of clothes, for one," she says dryly, "but also: handcuffs. Fire resistant ropes of some kind. Probably more types of vibrator, I have one but probably we'll want some variety... You know! Things!"

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???????

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Giggle.

"You literally just had me at your mercy, come on, you can't say there weren't things you wish you had available at your fingertips!! Not to say that you're not fantastic with the ice, because, damn, just. ... Oh I can get dildos in sizes that would be a terrible idea for someone without regeneration, ha!"

Being an esper: it has its (many) downsides, but also it's great sometimes.

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He covers his face with his hands and summons a pair of icicles to float over to his closet and open the doors. In they go, and out they get carrying a couple of large boxes.

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Hmm?

... Oooo.

"Oh I see," she says, amused. She pets the poor blushing boy, because he's so cute and embarrassed and one day he will be at her mercy, just wait probably there is some trauma there and she will be communicative and patient instead of just horny.

"Are all of these for just you?" she wonders, as she starts gleefully looking through everything.

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"Um."

The main attraction of the boxes are fleshlights and dildos. All sorts of sizes and shapes, double dildos that are theoretically meant for people with more holes than Tae-gun has, glow-in-the-dark ones, plenty of Bad Dragons, sooooo many things that look like they'd be incredibly unwise to try on—or, at least, like one would need a ton of practice. Like, a ton of it.

And then there's things that don't fit those categories here and there: cock rings, nipple clamps, plugs, and even a couple of chastity cages.

All things one could theoretically use on one's own (though why someone would use a chastity cage on themself is anyone's guess), though, so no handcuffs, no ropes, no blindfolds or gags, no sexy underwear. 

"I've never used them with anyone else?"

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"It's an impressive collection!!! I'd be delighted to try out... most of these, if you want to share, but if nothing else you have given me such ideas. Can I make a list of - actually, no, this needs a spreadsheet..."

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"A spreadsheet—?" he chokes. "With—what?"

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"Which ones I am enthusiastic about, ways they could be used, things I'd rather not touch, things you'd rather I not touch and instead get my own of, that sort of thing? Spreadsheets make everything better. It's a fact."

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"I don't. Mind. If you use any of them?"

q u i t e  t h e  o p p o s i t e

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"Okay! But if you had things you'd rather I not touch, I would respect that!" she says gleefully.

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If everything goes to shit with Hye-jin he can burn his entire collection and buy a new one. ...and also burn his entire house and maybe fling himself into the Sun or something, 'cause at that point not even having Woo-young validating his choices has saved him and what will he even do then?

But he's gotta believe that not everyone is that guy. He's gotta.

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"Um. There. Might be some things."

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Nod nod nod!

"Okay! Sorry, should I slow down? I'm excited."

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"N-no, it's f-fine. Um." He might need a minute, though.

(Why is he like this he had her trembling and moaning on his fingers like ten seconds ago but now he's a stammering maiden? Sometimes he really, really hates being himself.)

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Yeah, he seems like he needs a minute. She will hold him for that minute and press a kiss to the crown of his head, though, if that's okay? Pet, pet, adorable stammering maiden.

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He covers his face again. "Just, just start working on your spreadsheet or I'm never going to get the courage to say anything."

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Giggle. "Yessir. But I'm going to do that while holding you, because you're very cute."

Spreadsheet!!!! Of ~sex toys~!

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Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

 

 

 

 

 

 

...

......

.......peek?

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It is a very tidy spreadsheet! It's colorized.

There are a lot of cells colored green.

(This means enthusiastic yes.)

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Okay but, but,

.

...which. Does she like. Best. Um. Like. What are. The. Things she. Um.

Likes.

?

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.... yes. There are some no's on this list, but mostly there are yeses.

Currently she is focused on new and exciting ways to be at his mercy, because that was fun, and she feels they don't have the full range of equipment necessary for leveraging that for two people. So. A lot of that's getting actively looked up and added into the spreadsheet, instead of just looking through his (very amazing, for the record!!!) boxes.

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Oh.

...

..........

Okay but. But. C-can they. A-also m-maybe find ways for. Um. H-him. To b-be at her mercy? A-asking for a friend.

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If he's asking he's going to need to use his words!

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Aaaaahhh.

Um.

"W-we. Might need. Reinf-forced. Handcuffs."

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Blink blink. "... For you to be tied up with?"

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"Y-yes."

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"Oh I see," she purrs, and her demeanor... changes, slightly. From - whatever she was before - to someone who would like very much for him to be at her mercy. A proper fire queen, maybe. "Well I don't have very much experience on that side of things, but why don't you pick out something you'd like me to learn," her fingers trace up to take his chin and tilt it to the right angle, "on you, hm?"

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Ah fuck.

His gaze lands momentarily on one of the chastity cages lying on the bed and then flicks back to her and he swallows audibly and his friend is definitely very interested in these developments.

He has no idea how he'd ask for that. Actually he shouldn't ask. Actually he shouldn't even have thought about it. The idea sounds absolutely horrible, actually????? Why did he think it. He should not be thinking it.

He should think of a different thing. Something else. Anything else.

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She laughs, softly.

"Use your words~" she trills, closing her commscreen of spreadsheets and then moving a hand to touch more friendly things.

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Aaaaahhh.

"M-maybe. I mean. If. I." Nope. Nope. Nope nope nope nope he cannot use his words for that. He cannot even think that. What's he thinking, that he'll, he'll, he'll wear one of those in public like when he's clearing a dungeon so that when he's super backlashed it will be a lot less obvious because he'll only be able to get hard if she lets him? Is that what he's thinking? Because he shouldn't be thinking that!!!! He shouldn't be thinking that at all!! Bystander consent is a thing, even if, if, if actually that'd be the opposite of exhibitionism, in a way? And, and people shouldn't have opinions about what he's wearing in public if, if he's not, like, indecent or anything, if he's in normal clothes then what do people care if he's in a cock cage or wearing underwear at all of if he's got a butt plug in—

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Wh. Why. Why did his brain go there. Why did his brain go there now. Wh—

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"Hey, sunbae? You've been to America a lot, right?"

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?

"Yeah, why?"

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"There was something I wanted to buy from there but delivery wait times are insane."

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"Something you wanted to buy? What?"

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"There's this sex toy brand called Lovense, it's really cool, it has these WiFi thingies and you can control them remotely using an app—"

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?????????????????????????????????????????

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"—and I was talking to hyung last night about it and it would be really hot if I wore something like that outside and he had access to it from his phone—"

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"- Tae-gun," says a voice, gently but firmly, fingers brushing carefully through his hair. "Darling. Shhh, it's okay. It's okay."

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...well the mood is completely and thoroughly ruined, now. Good job, Lee Tae-gun.

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Nope, nope, fuck that, she does not know what is happening or why exactly, but she does know he needs cuddles and soothing murmurings and pets and being gently rocked. Whatever is wrong, she is here, and she is here to help.

"Sweetheart," she murmurs, still petting him, all traces of horniness gone in favor of taking care of her partner, "how can I help?"

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"I, I just," oh, he's crying. He hasn't done that in a while, not since—with Woo-young—but it was completely different then. "It's stupid. It's so stupid. I just remembered something dumb, something—Tae-hwan asked me for help with something. And I was so embarrassed, and it was so inappropriate, and he didn't even see why I was making it such a big deal, and he was so ridiculous, and I'm never going to see his face again—"

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Oh.

Okay, so, this was not the problem she thought it was, but the solution is still pretty much the same. Such as it is, anyway. She can't bring back the dead.

(This is why communication is so important!!!!)

"It's not stupid," she replies immediately, snuggling him. "It's not. None of that - what was it, iPhone from Hell shit, you hear me? It's okay to cry, I promise."

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Stupid stupid stupid stupid. Why is he crying? He didn't know Tae-hwan, didn't know him anywhere near as well as Woo-young did, they barely ever talked. He was just—always there. For almost as long as Woo-young was. They'd run into each other a lot, and occasionally he'd hear Tae-hwan's voice over the phone when he was talking to Woo-young, and they were alright, they weren't super close but he, he knew Tae-hwan, and if this hadn't happened then, then it might take a month before he saw Tae-hwan again? And he'd barely notice that it'd been a month, except, except it's going to be a lot longer than a month now. It's going to be forever. He's just never going to see Tae-hwan again, and it's not, it's not because Tae-hwan changed guilds or moved to America or anything like that, it's because he's gone. Tae-gun's little brother is gone, and he never even let Tae-hwan call him hyung even though Tae-hwan wanted to, and what would've been the problem? He could've been Tae-hwan's hyung, Tae-hwan could've had one more hyung, and just because Tae-gun wasn't thinking of him as a dongsaeng doesn't mean he wasn't Tae-gun's little brother, too. Yoo-min-sunbae let Tae-hwan call him hyung, and Yoo-min-sunbae also lost a little brother, and.

Fuck.

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Well, he has someone to hold him while he cries, to tell him he's not stupid, and pet his hair. Here she is, soft and warm and completely fine with being cried on.

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"I just keep, keep everyone away," he sobs. "A-all the time. I used to, u-used to have. More people. And then he—and now I d-don't. And I could've, c-could've, if Woo-young is my dongsaeng then, then Tae-hwan should've been too." Sniffle. "And, and is there a reason I insist on, on doing that? I barely knew him and he's gone and I don't even know if he ever bought the s-stupid thing he wanted to buy. 

"I hate this. I h-hate feeling like this. What's the point of, of being Lee Tae-gun if I can't even keep my dongsaengs safe? If b-because of some other fucking esper's fuckup Tae-hwan can just, just die? What am I for?"

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Pet pet pet. She's not going to engage with the bit where he asks what he's for, because that's been a reoccurring problem with them. He's not for anything, he's just in this wild and crazy world with all of the rest of them, and decided to be a really really good man and an even better esper and do his level best to save as many people as possible. This is absolutely not the time to try to beat down his fucked up world views, actually.

"Do you want to reconnect with people?" she asks, instead.

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"...huh?" Sniffle.

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"You said that you used to have more people. Are any of them available for you to message, or call, or something? Check in?"

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"Oh."

They... probably are, actually?

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"Well. That's available to you, if you want it." Pet pet pet.

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...it is. 

Isn't it. 

He... looks at the pile of sex toys on the bed.

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Snort.

"Oh, hush before you even start. I saw where you got them from, I'll put them away. We can use them later, okay?" Hair-kiss.

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"Okay..."

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"Get some water, okay? ... and please get me a glass, too, we both have kind of gone through a lot of fluids in what is in retrospect a short time. Ahem."

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Right. Yeah. He can go do that.

God, he's such a mess.

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Well, he's a mess that gets a tiny kiss on the end of his nose before he goes, so. Maybe it's not all that bad.

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That's making him have some feelings too which he's not going to examine at all. Off he goes to get water, and also to wash his face for good measure.

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Hye-jin stays behind and gets to putting away his truly astonishing amount of sex toys!

 

... He hears what sounds like a delighted cackle, a few minutes later.

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He startles at the sound and spends a fraction of a second thinking about bolting upstairs before he recognises the sounds as... positive? Uh?

Well, he'll just walk back up with her water then?

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She's perched on the bed (in one of his shirts, because she got cold), giggling over her comm screen.

"Did you know," she giggles, turning the screen to show him, "that the Korean government could offer a Yes/No screen for confirming if I want to be S-rank or not? It's not even like, the board of directors has reviewed your case or Quasar made one or something, it's just, just." Giggle.

It is in fact basically just a long letter telling her about how she's great and impressive, and they would be honored to make her an honorary S-rank if she would please just agree here. She got what she wanted! It sure isn't in question now!!

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He blinks. 

"What took them so long?" he wonders, offering her the glass. How was this not automatic after Volcanic Range?

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She giggles even as she takes the glass. Sipping at it will come later, when she's got the giggles more under control.

"Bureaucracy, probably? Anyway I'm going to just click yes or the media is going to be very confused." Click. (Giggle.) "But I was not imagining getting S-rank by the, the government equivalent of a 'Do you like me Y/N' note!!!!"

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She looks really happy. 

...oh.

"Congratulations."

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"Thank you! Probably I was being silly for even doubting it a little, just, you know, what if they didn't know for sure that I did it, what if there was international politicking and Japan throwing a fit because I left, something something, anxiety something." Water sip. "Thanks. ... Come hold me? I'm happy and want a hug about it."

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He can definitely do that, look what a good puppy partner he is.

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Eeeee comfy compatible esper snuggles.

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Honestly it's great, his backlash will be gone in no time (like six months).

"...if I did get in contact with some people I haven't seen in a while... would you want to meet any of them?"

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"Sure, if you want company or support."

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"Yeah. I... think I might."

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So he rubs his swollen eyes to try and make his vision less blurry and sends a message to a group chat he hasn't messaged in five years.

LeeTae-gun: Hey.
LeeTae-gun: How have you guys been?
LeeTae-gun: Would you have some time soon we could meet up and chat?


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Well that was... a success, he thinks? Much more of one than he'd expected. He's really not sure what happened to his brain there when he noticed that apparently Fugimura Hana-shi is a hot mess just like hyung but, hey, he'll take it. He still can't properly walk but he can, like, kinda move his legs! A little! If you squint! That's very promising.

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I messaged Si-yeon-hyung and Juheon-hyung.

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Record scratch.

you did?????

when? why? how? what about?

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Just now.

For reasons.

I miss them and I want to see them again.

They haven't replied yet, though.

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are the two of you decent?

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?

I'm not wearing anything, Hye-jin is.

We're not currently having sex.

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He'll take it, it's not like Tae-gun will ever develop a sense of what "decent" is beyond the way he appears in public.

i'm omw

He teleports to Tae-gun's foyer, pulls his shoes off, and rolls into the living room.

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Tae-gun is climbing down the stairs when he arrives.

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Hye-jin is still upstairs, getting on, uh, more clothes than what she'd been wearing, okay. Don't mind her she just wants to actually be decent!

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Tae-gun literally does not understand this, it's Woo-young.

"Hey."

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"'Hey'? Give me the goss! You messaged your exes?"

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"...they're not my exes."

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"Oh, fine, you messaged the two guys you spent several months in close proximity with, had a lot of sex with, and used to call hyung?"

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Tae-gun's immediate response involves Woo-young's own definition of "not dating" Tae-hwan but that just kind of makes his heart skip a beat because it just reminded him again that—

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Yeah.

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This gives Hye-jin time to get all of her clothes on, and then come downstairs! She's only a little bit disheveled and rushed, it's fine!

"Hi, Woo-young! It sounds like it went well?"

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Right. Yeah. It did. It went well.

"Yeah. She, um—reminded me very strongly of hyung, actually?"

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Oh?

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"Pretty literal, very badly in touch with her emotions, very bad at expressing them or working through them or understanding them."

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"Also pretty cute."

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Giggle.

"What a... glowing recommendation??? You like sunbae so much you went out and found another one."

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"I think she kind of landed on my lap, really, I didn't really find her.

"But, yeah, I think it went well? We're officially partnered, she's going to be joining Quasar, we spent the afternoon cuddling and watching a dorama... She's not planning on moving to Korea yet, but she'll be teleporting here to silo. Oh and she does, like, non-dungeon therapy work, too, with patients who are working through stuff? She can't be as directly effective with anything that's had a while to get entrenched but it's still a lot better than nothing, and she's getting a certification as a counselor and a degree in psychology."

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"Huh! Good for her. I look forward to meeting her properly at... some point, probably."

She consciously does not ask questions about the specifics of her mental esper powerset and if and how she can be used as a counter to Kang Jaeha. She will be good. (But on the inside, she's cautiously pleased and thinks this will probably help their chances if Kang Jaeha ever.... does... anything.)

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"Anyway! As I was saying! You messaged Si-yeon-sunbae and Juheon-sunbae?"

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"I... sent a message to our old group chat."

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Encouraging smile! She has no idea who those people are, and that's okay!

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Woo-young looks at her the raises an eyebrow at Tae-gun. "I see what must've happened, now. And you didn't even tell her who they are?"

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Blink.

"Oh." To Hye-jin: "Si-yeon-hyung and Juheon-hyung are two of my old partners."

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"Oh! Okay." Pause.

"I am also fine with them helping with your backlash if you'd like to go that route," she then adds, because that seems relevant.

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oh he had not thought about that

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Woo-young looks between the two of them and sighs. "Well... let me know how it goes? Or I can message them myself if you want but something tells me your pride would want me to wait at least a day before I poke them to see whether they're ghosting you."

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"...well, it'd be their right to."

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.... he pulled away because Kang Jaeha had went and made all partners potential threat vectors, and the entire idea was poisoned to him.

Ah.

"Sunbae, may I hug you?"

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Blink.

"Sure."

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Hug!

Sometimes things go wrong in relationships and friends drift apart. Or ghost each other. There isn't really any kind of comforting words she can offer, here. Only hug. But she can offer hug.

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Phone notification!

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!!!!!!!!

He opens the commscreen immediately.

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🍀LeeJuheon: Hi Tae-gun!
🍀LeeJuheon: I've been alright, how about yourself?
🍀LeeJuheon: Meeting up sounds lovely! How's this Friday evening?
🍀LeeJuheon: Would that work for you @freefall?

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🪁freefall: k.

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...oof.

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He checks his schedule—Friday evening's got a dungeon but if he can squeeze clearing dungeons a bit earlier he'd probably have time—he looks at Hye-jin because his schedule isn't just his own anymore. "Um, would it be okay if we—"

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"Yes," she says immediately, amused. "We'll be fine."

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He nods, inputs the request into the scheduling system, then goes back to the chat.

LeeTae-gun: Friday works.
LeeTae-gun: Where?

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🍀LeeJuheon: Min Ha-young's? It's cosy and nearby.

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🪁freefall: no
🪁freefall: Hwi-min's
🪁freefall: there's booths

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🍀LeeJuheon: Sounds good to me!
🍀LeeJuheon: Is Kim Hye-jin coming? Are Hyun-jae and Chun-hee invited?

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He looks at Hye-jin.

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"I'm happy to come if you want me there," she supplies.

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LeeTae-gun: Yes to both.

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🍀LeeJuheon: Cool! Looking forward to seeing you and meeting her!

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Oh.

Okay.

He's actually going to see them.

He—really has no idea how to feel right now. If he weren't Lee Tae-gun his legs would be going weak, right now.

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"And now you reply that you're looking forward to seeing them too, and you have my permission to add in that I am also looking forward to meeting them," supplies his partner, who is very amused, but is also from the same alien planet he's from, so she knows what social things he would probably want to have said in this situation.

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Oh. Yeah. Right. He should do that.

LeeTae-gun: We are also looking forward to seeing you all.

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🪁freefall: .......?????????
🪁freefall: did you get replaced by an alien tae-gun???
🪁freefall: oh is kim hye-jin coaching you
🪁freefall: good job kim hye-jin

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🍀LeeJuheon: Hahaha

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...why is this making him feel like crying again. He's so pathetic.

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"Oh. Oops. Busted," she snorts.

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Then she sees Tae-gun's face and hugs him again. Hug.

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Patheticccccccc.

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"You know it still counts even if you're not actually saying the self-loathing thoughts aloud, right?"

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Ughhhhhh. He covers his face.

"I thought they'd hate me and maybe they don't and I don't know why not when I hurt them as much as I did."

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You don't hate Kang Jaeha, she thinks but doesn't say. It would be picking a dumb fight and she'd really rather not.

"Feelings are complicated. That's how they work," she says instead, which admittedly is still the earlier point but at least doesn't tapdance on his horrific triggers, so. Improvement!

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"You of all people should know that, hyung."

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"...I guess..."

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"...Hye-jin, fetch me a glass of water? Hyung, stay here."

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...? Ok?

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"Fetching," she agrees, and then off she goes to fetch.

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?

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"No I don't particularly want to tell you anything in private."

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??????

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Here is a glass of water for Woo-young. She is curious about whatever they presumably talked about, but she is being a good person! And will not ask.

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"Thank you!"

He splashes Tae-gun with its entire contents.

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feawlkjuygdkweaudhl?????

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"Stop! Being! A! Fucking! Idiot! For! Five! Minutes! For! The! Love! Of! God!!!!!"

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???!?!???!!

"... that was what you wanted the water for???" she snorts, dumbfounded but giggling despite this.

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"Sometimes, when a cat is misbehaving, you have to spritz them. If the cat is as big as hyung is spritzing won't cut it."

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"I'm not a cat," he sulks.

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"No, what you are is a fucking idiot.

"You loved these guys—no, shut up, I don't care what stupid thing you're about to say, you loved them even if you weren't in love with them, they were incredibly important to you, they were your best friends, they're two of the single-digit number of people who have ever seen you at your most wretched and vulnerable, and your fucking shitty abusive mind-rapist ex isolated you from them as part of his months-long campaign to make you have no one but him in your life, and then because you are in fact a fucking idiot you spent five years without contacting them out of embarrassment.

"Guess what, dumbass, of course they don't hate you, and now that we're in the process of finally fixing your brain you have to see! That! People! Care! About! You! And that you miss them! And that they've been one part of the big gaping hole in your heart that you're only now, finally allowing yourself to fix!

"So! Stop being a fucking idiot! And be happy instead!"

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He's not going to cry because he's not path— he is kind of pathetic actually but he's not going to cry because his best friend asked him not to and, and, and he doesn't know how to be happy but, but, but—

"Okay," he manages to choke out. "I'll try."

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Awww. Well, good. He deserves to be happy. She... doesn't have a towel or anything... but she can go get one and see about drying him off.

 

".... I don't think spritzing cats is actually recommended for policing their behavior," she says awkwardly, because that's the only thing she can think to say.

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"Maybe not but it sure works on hyung."

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"You're a dick."

...he sniffles.

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"You've had years to get used to it. Now give me a hand up, I wanna take a shower—no, you know what, a nice bath with one of those bath bombs you never use, today was stressful."

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He sighs and summons an ice platform under Woo-young's chair to lift him up the stairs.

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Woo-young ruffles Tae-gun's wet hair when he's floating past him.

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Harrumph.

...he leans towards Hye-jin because she's very nice and she didn't need to be drying him off but she's very nice and he's very happy to have her.

.........maybe he could use his words to say this.

"You're very nice and I'm very happy to have you."

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... Giggle.

"Thank you. I try to be. I'm happy to have you, too." She pets him, just a little, affectionately.

And then she cheerfully dumps the towel on his head and calls up to Woo-young, "Hey, should we feed you?"

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"Yes, please!" he calls back.

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...why did having a towel dumped on his head make him kind of horny. Lee Tae-gun, what the fuck is wrong with you.

Right. Food. Not thinking about that, especially given that Woo-young is now back home.

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They'll have later for that! The confluence has honestly been a lot more manageable once they started having sex. It's not that she wants the confluence to go on, or anything, but. She now doesn't feel like the both of them are slowly drowning in miserable ever growing backlash. If it's one of the long ones, which it very well might be, they will probably be okay.

(So long as Kang Jaeha doesn't do any of his shit. But that's always a clause in just about everything she ever thinks, now.)

For now: yes, food. Hye-jin has by now properly raided and cataloged his kitchen, and can accordingly make a meal that is competently made and also not instant! Eat healthy, damn you!


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Of course, this does mean that also sometimes Hye-jin needs to replace the groceries she ends up going through. There is some kind of arcane method by which Tae-gun's secret house acquires more food supplies, but she doesn't know it. So what happens is that sometimes when she's at home she goes grocery shopping, and carries everything back, to be teleported with her, once she's done. Could she just get her groceries delivered? Sure, but that makes her predictable, and she's currently trying to be really frustrating to any potential crazy stalker exes.

Mind, this way also has downsides, like 'be out in public where the mind-rapist ex could maybe get her,' but at this point she's almost playing chicken with the bastard to try and get some kind of proof that he is in fact a crazy stalker ex.

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Well, if he is a crazy stalker ex he is continuing not to get her. Maybe she's just too good at avoiding being predictable, or maybe he's just given up and decided that she is bringing Tae-gun joy and that's really what matters so he'll leave her alone. Who knows!

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Hye-jin definitely doesn't. She just has suspicions. Many, many suspicions.

And soon she will also have fruit! She's picking through them right now, trying to find things that look like they'll keep for a while. Hmmm, how many is an appropriate number, it's hard to estimate how much to get with how Woo-young is only sometimes also present at the secret silo. Ehh, Tae-gun's a black void of caloric consumption sometimes, and he likes easy things he can just grab and eat, erring on getting more seems like the safest side...

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A teenage girl taps her on the shoulder. "Excuse me? Um, do you know where the cleaning products aisle is?"

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"Uh - back of the store, to the left," she provides, with a smile.

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"Thank you!" He goes in the direction Hye-jin pointed.

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...she. She goes in the direction Hye-jin pointed.

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MOTHERFUCKER.

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She neither flinches nor sets the obvious innocent person on fire, and instead somewhat stiffly goes back to looking through produce. She's a combat esper, and she has been working very hard to get her reflexes right on what she would do if she saw him again. Which is: absolutely nothing, except attempting to leave.

Well. Well. She thought he was going to do something like 'try to make her flinch into setting someone innocent on fire,' so. Here she is. She lives here now. Current victim of the brain wizard, that's her. Is this better than being in limbo? Honestly, for her, yes. She has an enemy to fight, and she will make him hurt for fucking with her. She can't use her powers, for fear of being turned against someone innocent, but her mind's doing just fine, thanks.

Her shopping list isn't quite complete, but she's going to be done shopping for now anyway. She could just abandon her cart and flee, but that would make her look crazy, and if she looks crazy, he wins the larger war. If he keeps her under wraps for too long someone will miss and retrieve her. She has dungeons scheduled, and she's very famous. He has dungeons scheduled, and is also somewhat, though noticeably less, famous. There is a timer on his ability to fuck with her, and trapping her entirely in an unreality only of her own imagination would get attention from everyone else, and, most importantly, proof that he's abusing his powers. So. She just needs to keep attempting to get away in ways that seem perfectly normal to outside viewers, and also viciously piss him right off in ways only he will know about. That last one isn't tactically required, that's just for personal enrichment.

She can do that.

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"Do do do do do, do do do do do do do do~," she begins humming, as she attempts to finish up and go pay for her current groceries.

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Someone bumps into her.

"Ah, excuse me," he says before turning back to comparing the prices of two brands of instant noodles.

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"Sorry, my fault," she agrees, to the person that is almost certainly not Jaeha, all sweetness and light.

Back to humming!

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The self-checkout machines seem to all be broken. The line of people waiting to be checked out is short but extant.

The back of her neck feels itchy, like someone's breathing down it.

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The self checkout lines are probably all fine, but she doesn't know which ones are actually fine and which ones aren't, so. Yep. Standing in line it is. While humming.

Someone breathing down her neck? Who ever could that be? Is it the someone she's beating by seeming completely fine and downright cheerful towards? She thinks it must be!

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Is she beating him, though? Is she sure of that? Why is her heart starting to beat faster, if so?

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That sounds like stuff that is not humming along to the silliest song she can think of in a pinch, and so is not her problem, actually!

Also, c'mon, Jaeha, do better. This isn't the point where she'd be getting nervous. She's a damned combat esper, what the hell do you think it takes to make her nervous? Because she killed Volcanic Range, thank you, and she is in public and is aware you can't do shit to her here, only put her in situations where she could maybe ruin herself. That's nothing. She's been living with the ability to be a terrifying person of mass destruction for her entire adult life.

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Sure, she can keep telling herself that.

"Next, please," calls the bored cashier.

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The next person walks up to him. He doesn't have a ton of groceries, so he should be quick.

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Honestly, that's just kind of funny. Surrounded by Jaehas. She's not going to giggle about it, but on the inside: she's amused.

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The buzzing noise of the fluorescent lights feels kind of too loud. But she shouldn't be able to hear it, should she? The background music—

—is gone. Actually it's been gone for a while, now that she thinks about it? Or was it ever even playing since she walked into the store?

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"You know you're not good enough for him, right?" the person in front of her asks without even turning around to look at her. He's so quiet it could almost have been just her imagination.

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She thinks that's up to him to decide, actually. He's an adult, with agency, he can make his own choices.

She doesn't say that out loud, only smiles at the person in front of her. Sounds like she's getting on somebody's nerves and he's trying different tactics to see what unsettles her!

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The lights are starting to go off. The buzzing is getting louder.

She feels sweaty under her clothes.

"Korea has lots of A-rank espers who could be S-rank. Like myself, of course. You're really just riding on the coattails of his success, but you think you're good just because you're better than your last partner. That's a low, low bar."

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Ahuh, ahuh, keep searching, jackass. She's sure you'll find something eventually, and maybe it won't even be something that a blind toddler could trip over in an empty room!

Guess what she's still humming? That's right! It's still Caramelldansen! Very softly, so as not to disturb the actual people that are definitely next to her and have nothing to do with this stalker's little crush.

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More lights are going out. The buzzing noise is actually getting uncomfortable.

"Quasar is only keeping you around to appease their star boy. Sure, they're pretty happy with the stunt they think you pulled in Volcanic Rage, but they don't really believe you did all of that. They do so, so much for Tae-gun. They'll do things they think are stupid or even counterproductive, if it'll keep Tae-gun happy." He finally looks over his shoulder at her. "I'd know.

"And you're just making the same mistakes again, aren't you? All of your friends are from Quasar, your whole life is with the guild again, even though you wanted something different. When it inevitably falls down, they'll choose him, not you, just like White Star did."

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Oooo, low blow, Jaeha, low blow! Except, wait, no, you're speaking to the crazy woman who can and will burn every single bridge available and flee the country, because she knows she'll be okay. If she's not S-rank, if Quasar doesn't want to protect her? Fine. She can fend for herself and stand on her own, unlike some clingy dipshits that can't even get over a breakup after half a decade.

She gives a little sigh, and checks the time on her phone. It will probably tell her something dumb and Jaeha related, but probably her perception of time is important or something.

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...well, either he's lying with the clock or she's lost a reasonable amount of time.

Evidence for the latter is that the guy that was in front of her is now getting his items checked and the guy behind her is making annoyed noises from the back of his throat for her to move forward.

All lights are out, now, except the ones directly above her and the cashier. The buzzing noise is loud enough she wouldn't be able to hear normal conversation with it if she weren't an esper. She can't hear the conversation between the cashier and the person that had been in front of her, as a matter of fact.

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She doesn't believe the lying clock, but it's useful data to keep in mind now. (She should start keeping firmer track of her time.)

"Sorry," she apologizes, to the Jaeha behind her that she's been holding up, as she dutifully scoots forwards. "Lots of sleepless nights." Exactly the sort of innocent comment that will come off fine to a stranger and get under Kang Jaeha's fucking skin.

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If it's getting to him, this illusion of him doesn't show it. "It's kind of funny that you take so much pride in being self-reliant like that," the guy behind her muses. Her clothes feel really sweaty, like she's been running, and her heart feels kind of painful. "I gotta give it to you, it's not like you're wrong. You did come to Korea! Congratulations! You didn't even try to keep any of your old relationships, you still refuse on principle to talk to a guy who wanted to help you because he wounded your petty pride, you're making yourself alone for no good reason. It's not even interesting to say that your arrogance is a weakness because you just keep shooting yourself in the foot with it. Actually I said it was funny, but GLaDOS was right on that one."

Of course she can hear him despite the loud buzzing.

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That's not the sort of thing that normal people say in public, so she won't be replying to it. Even if she thinks I think one of us is objectively more sad than the other. But, hey, maybe he's a mind reader and can read her literal thoughts and hear the sick burns she's coming up with.

Is it checkout time yet?

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For a moment, the illusion lifts around her, and she gets the vision/memory that the guy behind her had been trying to ask her for a picture or an autograph and she just smiled at him and didn't say anything until he got too awkward and looked away mumbling something because the famous S-rank esper Kim Hye-jin completely blanked him—

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—but no, it's not checkout time yet.

"Have you ever met Fugimura Hana, by the way? She seems like a sweet girl."

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She's done worse in public before, and it's a confluence, she has every reason to be a little spacey and smiley and humming an obnoxious tune. She's overworked and tired. Sorry, if you actually exist, random fan, but you might not, so.

Still not a normal thing to say to someone! She will not be replying until and unless she sees an opening for something that would make sense to say in public!

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"Next customer, please!"

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Here she is, yes.

"Hello," she says cheerfully, because that is a safe and normal thing to say in just about any ordinary circumstances, and if Jaeha's decided to make her look like a crazy person, well. She's a friendly crazy person. But she doesn't think he's doing that just yet. She thinks he's fucking with her because he can. It's what she'd do, if she were him. ... Well, no, she'd move on with her life and make something of herself, but if for some reason she was playing elaborate mind control mind games with someone for reasons that actually made any fucking sense. Then she'd play the long game and fuck with that person. Probably.

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"Good evening, customer-nim. I can't wait to hear what you're going to tell Tae-gun and Woo-young about this."

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Damn it, now she's going to be cornered into saying something rude, probably.

Well, it will only be mildly rude if she can help it. Which she can. "Just card for me, please, I am way too overworked lately," she says, apologetically.

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He starts scanning her products. "The funny thing is—well, there are numerous funny things, here, really, but one of the funny things is that you're so confident you know a man you met only a couple of months ago? You're so absolutely certain that he'll respond in the ways you think he will, feel the things you think he will, despite all evidence to the contrary. You're far, far more confident that you understand him than I think you by rights ought to be. You're projecting the ways you feel about Hideyoshi onto the ways it would make sense for Tae-gun to feel about me. But Tae-gun isn't any more rational about me than I am about him. You should understand that I haven't been wrong about anything, and I'm not about to start."

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"I mean, you don't even know why he'll forgive me."

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Smiiiiiile.

She gets out her credit card for when it will be appropriate to use it, probably. She doesn't have that many items, really.

("I think if you were actually right about everything you wouldn't be in this situation," she thinks but doesn't say, because that is not the sort of thing one randomly says to hapless cashiers that are just doing their job.)

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"Anyway, it was nice chatting to you. See you around~"

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"That'll be twenty-two thousand five hundred and forty won," says the cashier, swiping her card.

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"Thank you! Have a lovely day."

Card goes back to its designated location. And then she can get what are... probably... her grocery bags, and leave what is probably the store, picking back up her earlier tune to hum.

And then when she is safely outside of what is probably the grocery store, she will reach up to gently adjust her earring and click goes the little 'teleport me away' button. It's keyed to take her to one of many random locations, she'll find out where it is when she gets there!

It also, quite reasonably, sends both Woo-young and Tae-gun a message about this! Hye-jin has used her secret teleport exit!

She does not know if that means she's out of the mind games yet, but it sure is a useful thing to have done!

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Well it sure looks like she's being teleported! And she is certainly having the subjective sensation that she is in the correct location!

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Yeah, she doesn't believe it. The limits are of her own imagination, so. She's just going to get out her phone and see about sending a message to Woo-young.

Guess who I ran into today! That's right, the worst ex ever!

But she doesn't trust that to have worked, either, so she's also going to start going through her commscreen to see about even more teleporting.
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yeah got the notif

you doing okay? you're safe?

hyung is panicking obviously

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Trying to verify that, idk!
I am not a danger to others though.

She does teleportation via different methods, to different locations worked out that are far away from her home, but still in Korea. Teleport via commscreen, teleport via text message to comm database by sending a specific code, teleport teleport teleport. This is a bit wasteful of teleports but if you can't use them in response to a crazy mind rapist, really, when the fuck can you use them? Okay, now to the handholding silo.

I think I am in the handholding silo currently
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my sources say that yes

do you want me to teleport you here? or get hyung to you?

he might actually kill me if he doesn't get to see you soon

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Woo-young is being facetious.

Please make sure you're safe above everything else.

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You have my permission to put me wherever you think is best.
Also I have groceries, fyi
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oh right that's what you were doing

...maybe leave them behind in case jaeha left a tracker in the bags or something

...............actually we should be super extra paranoid, is it ok if i just teleport you stark naked into hyung's bedroom, i don't need to look to aim

if you have like a pacemaker or something tell me though cuz otherwise i'm even trashing your chip

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IUD but yes fine go ahead
Sigh.
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sorry

Vworp.

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Ironically enough, Tae-gun is not naked this time! In fact he looks like he is ready to bolt at any minute. He's still tense but visibly calms down when he sees her.

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...and, uh, something else, shut up libido now's not the time.

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"Hi there. I am going to need to find another birth control solution because Woo-young probably just trashed my IUD. Yay. Start putting information I couldn't possibly come up with myself in front of my face somehow? A movie or a book or song or something. A documentary about whales, maybe."

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...right.

"You probably should be the one to come up with it." He's not going to think too hard about that.

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"No, I really shouldn't! It would be my mind coming up with whatever he's throwing at me, probably. Please pick something for me."

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"I mean just the—idea—whale documentary is probably fine," he sighs. He can get one running on the commscreen; he doesn't have a TV in his bedroom, not being a person who particularly likes watching it. And then he'll find her clothes.

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"Okay. Thank you. Um. ... Cuddle me when you can, please, I think I was very irritating to him as a person but I don't know for sure and, uh. ... I handle tense situations well but I still would like a hug."

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...well she doesn't need clothes if they're going to be cuddling, right? He leaves them on the bedside table and kicks his shoes off and removes his jacket and then he can cuddle yes.

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Hye-jin snorts and snuggles up gratefully.

"We're going to need to get you a list of what to do if trying to verify that I'm not in an illusion partially created by my own mind, you're just doing everything I suggest. .... I don't have my phone or my chip for the commscreen, can you poke Woo-young for novel ideas to make me think I'm not living an illusion?"

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"Wouldn't that be worse, though? 'Cause if the ideas don't come from you and you're in an illusion then they'll be ideas that he picked because he can simulate them."

Arghhhhh he thought about it. Fuck. He hates thinking about it.

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"Well, okay, yes, but in those circumstances then it means I'd be wasting his time and processing energy getting him to come up with new and exciting ways to regale me with whale facts, which I feel is a victory in itself."

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He snickers.

"Okay."

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Woo-young links them a forty-five-minute-long video about how science communication was ruined by people peddling String Theory for decades making all physicists look like crackpots.

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Ooooo, that sounds great!

"Also, the longer I make him waste time the better off I am, aren't I? He's on a time limit and needs this whole thing to be secret, whereas I? I will be missed! .... Oh you know what I should do, try to type up everything I remember, that would be very clever of me. ... Gimme your commscreen, pretty please? I'll keep watching science facts in the background."

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Commscreen!

"...do you not just want a new chip, though?" he asks, summoning the little chip cube.

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"Well, okay, yes, but. Look I mostly just want to get as much information as I remember down as quickly as possible. ... I'm going to include the burns I thought of but didn't say because I was in public and it would make me look like a crazy person." She'll poke the chip cube.

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Sting, chip!

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Ow. Okay! Typing up what she remembers! While watching Science Facts in the background. ... Science facts should probably be paused until she's done, actually, they are not doing their proper job of making her firmly feel like she's not in a dreamlike illusion trap thing.

She gets to the part where he tells her that she's not good enough for Tae-gun and pauses to look at him. He... is resolutely not looking at what she's writing, that's fair. Okay. On she goes, while the memory's fresh. "A copy of this will be available for you to read if you ever want to," she informs him quietly, but then it's back to typing while keeping the screen carefully angled away from him.

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He nods, without looking, and he will definitely not read it.

Woo-young will. If he needs to then... Hye-jin and Woo-young can tell him. Otherwise, no, he does not want to know.

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Woo-young is getting her updated stuff live and texting her as he reads it.

we're going to have to assume that he aborted the least fruitful inroads

though i gotta say this is a bit scattershot

...not totally, though, he was clearly aiming places that aren't

uh

completely nonsensical

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She finishes up what she remembers before she looks at his replies or responds, but once everything is about as nailed down as she can get it:
Yeah, it honestly felt like he'd been overthinking what he wanted to say to me in order to get under my skin for like, the entire time he's been off grid.
Which is admittedly both funny and very sad, get a hobby, dude
I think Volcanic Range is probably what set him off, this seems, like. Pissed at me in particular, and a lot of this was trying to put me down in any way he could grasp at.
Gonna watch science facts now though
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have fun with science facts

we're gonna need to figure something else out other than your IUD though if he's gonna be doing this

alright if i review the video/audio footage?

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Absolutely, please do. ... Let me know if that guy behind me in line really did want a picture, I feel bad.
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approximate timestamp?

oh wait nevermind he was 100% fucking with your sense of time i'm sure of it

i'll just watch and let you know

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K. Thank you.
I'll try to figure out other birth control options besides like
'Wheeeeee backlash to cause a miscarriage, there is no way this could possibly go wrong!'
or some shit like that.
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yeah

we'll figure it out

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Tae-gun's not going to apologise for the ninety-third time for how his own mess is spilling all over everyone he cares about because he has pattern recognition and Woo-young would yell. But it's still his fault.

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No, shut it, you. It's science facts time for your iPhone from Hell brain, too. No dumb autocompletes about how this is all your fault.


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Okay, so, solutions, such as they are, are:

Tae-gun is getting a vasectomy. (And some of his sperm frozen, for if he ever wants to have kids.) This is not an immediate solution, since he won't be free of little swimmers for a while yet, but it's not the only one being used. Also, it's just genuinely good practice, Tae-gun probably should have done this years ago and only didn't by way of, in order: partnering only with men, and then avoiding all partnerships at all. He is fine having this problem solved now that it is actually a problem for him in particular.

Hye-jin's getting another IUD, fastlined through Quasar. There was some debate about other birth control options, hormonal injections featuring heavily, but those might react badly to her body, and furthermore might not even work, with her secret regeneration that is definitely not getting put in front of any doctors for proper testing. Furthermore, they are in fact in the middle of a confluence. Best to put the thing that was taken out back as soon as possible so that the combat esper is definitely dungeon capable. This sucks and hurts a bunch, but it's not the first time she's been through this, so. She'll just be mad about having to do it again in under a year after she got the fucking first one put in. Damn you, Kang Jaeha.

They will also all be more closely tracking their time, or to be more accurate, having a program that will track their respective times for them and dump it onto the out of country database. They are given new and exciting emergency teleport button accessories.

Hye-jin will also... grudgingly.... stop poking the proverbial lion by hanging out near her house so much. Grumble. Grumble grumble. There are other, more unpredictable, more all-over-Korea places that she can go be outside and enjoy a conversation with an ordinary person. Grumble.

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She is going to poke the proverbial lion by sending aforementioned lion a fucking email, though. Because she's incorrigible. It's through an anonymous email that isn't connected to her, though he will obviously be able to guess that it's from her from context. Of course, it might get directed to spam, but she kind of doesn't think so.

From the girl who had the Kang Jaeha shopping experience!

In order:

It's not that I think I'm good enough for him, exactly? It's that I trust his judgement, and he seems to like me an awful lot. I understand that difference is confusing for you, but I hope you can grasp it eventually.

All ranks are arbitrary things humans have made because we like putting people into boxes. A lot of people have powers that can be many different ranks, it's how they apply them that matters. So, I don't worry too much about them, how about you?

Actually, speaking of: you sure do talk like you know about the specifics of my life when you don't, really. It's rich hearing that I'm bad at friendship from you, you know. Try a mirror next time you want to do that speech about driving everyone away, I think you need it more than I do.

If you were right about everything, I don't think you'd be in the situation you're in. But sure, keep digging, bud, that grave of yours isn't deep enough! I'm sure doing the same thing that you have for the past half a decade will work eventually! Just keep doing that thing over and over and over again, you'll get a different result!

You're right, it's weird to act like I know a guy I've only known for a couple months. Not quite as weird as acting like I know someone who has spent a solid two-thirds of the time he's known me actively avoiding me, though. Especially when that time period is something like 'half a decade.' Kind of a long time. In the ways of the noble scientist: my data's more recent than yours.

You're so sure that he'll forgive you, but I don't think you even understand why he left you. You just think everything will go back to the way it was if you tear him down far enough that you're his only way to live.

It won't, though, even if you do manage to make him that desperate. I'm not the one who destroyed your perfect fairytale life. You are. You did it long before I got here. Take it from an expert: you can't un-burn a bridge, only build something new.

But you're not. You're just destroying things that seem like they're in your way. It's a chasm, not a mountain, dumbass, destruction will get you absolutely nowhere.

Please actually do something useful with your life.


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The problem with squeezing all of his dungeons on Friday to have time in the evening is that they don't have that much time after the last one to deal with backlash. Enough to get going, probably, and Hye-jin is mostly fine, but he's about to meet two of his gorgeous and smoking hot ex-partners and he's kind of still a bit horny and he already had trouble being teased by then when he wasn't horny. 

...should he maybe get Hye-jin to lock him up? If he doesn't turn on his self-reinforcement power his cock definitely won't break through the cage! That way he'll definitely be safe from being too horny around three people whom he's really compatible with and who could definitely overpower him if they tried and they'll be in a restaurant's booth so no one will be alerted to the fact that he's helplessly at the mercy of a roomful of espers taking turns using his body for their own pleasure without any concern for his feelings or consent while he's squirming and unable to resist because he can't use his enhancement powers because if he does his cage will break and he can't let that happen—

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—that got really specific really fast, get a grip, Lee Tae-gun.

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They had about as much of a quickie as time could allow, but, uh, yeah, poor Tae-gun usually needs longer sessions before he is fully calmed down. But they're really starting to push it, and he absolutely would not want to be late regardless, so...

"Sorry," she apologizes, and then she does the exact trick Woo-young did, and dumps a glass of water on him. He's not in clothes yet, it's fine.

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Why do people keep doing this to him!!!!!!

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Argh now he needs to dry off in addition to putting clothes on. And water or no he still has a boner and that cage would be a great idea except he'd need to get soft and he's really not sure at all he could do that in the time they have before they should get going.

Sigh.

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They keep doing it because it works!!!! He is actually broken out of his smut spiral!!! If you want them to do other things then those other things need to work!!!!!

Also, who does he take her for, she's obviously going to help him dry off. Extra quickly, actually, she's a fire esper. His hair is getting magically blow dried.

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"Should you actually be getting more backlash like this?" he grumbles.

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"Oh, like you're one to talk," she snorts. "You use your ice for carrying stuff all the time, but I'm suddenly bad at backlash budgeting when we're actually on a timetable?"

She raises her eyebrows, then hands him his shirt.

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"Because we're actually on a timetable," he argues, accepting his shirt and pulling it on with a petulant pout.

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"Ahuh. Turnabout's fair play, and my backlash means I just get a bit chilly. A little to help get you presentable is completely reasonable, you're just cranky about it."

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Pout.

And clothes on, he guesses.

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Yep. Clothes on for them both.

Also: pouting is better than out of his mind horny, so she considers this a success.

They should, by her calculation and with the help of teleportation, arrive early.

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Indeed! Though it's Woo-young who's teleporting them out of his personal stash since this isn't an official Quasar thing.

Today Tae-gun is dressing up again because he's anxious and he wants to leave a good impression. Does this even matter when he's meeting people who have seen him naked squirming and begging? Probably not! But it lets him direct his nervous energy somewhere for a bit.

"Ready?" he asks Hye-jin but of course he's really asking himself.

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Hye-jin is also dressed up! It might actually matter for her, since nobody she's meeting today has seen her in any kind of compromising position that wasn't internationally televised.

"Ready."

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He texts Woo-young and then they disappear.

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Hwi-min's is a low-key but reasonably upscale traditional Korean restaurant; as such, they're reasonably used to high-profile customers. That said, arriving by literal teleportation still draws its fair share of surprise and stares from employees and passersby alike—and then outright gaping by some of the people who notice these are Lee Tae-gun and Kim Hye-jin.

"Good evening, Lee Tae-gun-nim, Kim Hye-jin-nim," says the maître d'. "You have a reservation for a party of six, yes? You're the first two to arrive. If you'll follow my colleague?" they ask, gesturing inside at said colleague.

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"Good evening," she responds with a nod and a smile. Hello everyone! Yes, surprise, they're here, and they're famous, isn't that fun.

Anyway yes, following colleague to the out of the way booth. Hopefully she can keep her partner from exploding from either horniness or anxiety.

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There are six cushions on the floor around a low table with a teapot and teacups. "Would you like to order anything before the rest of your party arrives?"

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"Bori-cha for me, please." Tea is fortunately going to be served hot in this time of year, which makes it a perfectly appropriate hot thing for her to drink. See, Tae-gun, she's being responsible.

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"Just water, please. Tap is fine."

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"I will be just a moment," they reply, bowing and closing the door behind themself after they leave.

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She thanks them, and then: yep, it's the waiting game. ... She can hold Tae-gun's hand if he wants.

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...yeah. Might be useful.

"Maybe we shouldn't have arrived this early..."

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"We're not that early. And if you'd arrived late, or on time, you probably would have overthought that, too."

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Well, granted.

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Ahuh.

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They arrive only a few minutes later, and all of them together.

One of them is very tall—about as tall as Park Yoo-min—and pretty buff to boot. His hair is silver and his eyes are moss green, and when his eyes land on Tae-gun his face splits into a huge smile.

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Next to him is a woman that would in any other company be pretty tall—she's taller than Hye-jin, who is herself taller than the average Korean woman—with long light-blue hair and blue eyes.

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And if the first man was unreasonably tall, the second is unreasonably short, his eyes golden and his hair blond and styled in an undercot with a messy top, wearing a chain around his neck and several earrings on both ears. His face goes through a few complicated expressions when he sees Tae-gun and then Hye-jin but he settles on reasonably neutral.

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And the person who is probably his partner is yet shorter than him, with fluffy neck-length pink hair and large red pink eyes, wearing a choker with a heart-shaped charm.

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Tae-gun stands up and bows. "These are my old partners Lee Juheon and Ha Si-yeon and their current partners Baek Hyun-jae and Kim Chun-hee," he tells Hye-jin, gesturing at each of them in turn. "And this is my current partner Kim Hye-jin."

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She also stands to bow. Tall pairing and short pairing! She will not be calling them by these nicknames outside of her head, but it makes it fairly straightforward to keep everyone attached to their names.

"A pleasure to meet you all," she says sincerely.

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"Likewise!"

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"Tae-gun what in the world are you doing," says the woman introduced as Baek Hyun-jae with a sigh before she walks up to him and pulls him into a tight hug.

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!

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"Can I join in on that action?"

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???

He... nods?

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Cool he is now also being hugged by a big hulking wall of muscle.

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...tsk.

Ha Si-yeon doesn't join in, and instead just sits on one of the cushions.

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Ummmm.

She's not sure what to do actually.

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Awwwww. Cute?? Cute. This is good, Tae-gun needs more hugs in his life. Hye-jin beams a little, then heads off to cover her partner's openings and therefore rescue Chun-hee from the social awkwardness. She sits down on her own cushion, smiling brightly at both members of the short and warm colored partnership.

"I already ordered some Bori-cha, if you'd like any?"

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"Oh! Um, I'll accept some, thank you," says Kim Chun-hee, gratefully sitting down, too.

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After a couple more seconds the taller pair releases Tae-gun from the hug and sits down, too.

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Yeah. Um. Yeah. He'll sit.

...............he has no idea what to do next. The platitudes like "How've you been?" die in his throat because, because. It's been more than five years. And also they worked together in dungeons during this time, here and there, but Tae-gun... was too embarrassed to actually interact with any of them and so never did, so it feels even more awkward to ask because—he had so many opportunities to.

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His partner waits for a few seconds, then sighs and elbows him.

"Apology first," she coaches, sipping her tea.

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Ha Si-yeon snorts despite himself.

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Then tries to go back to pouting.

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Oh. Oh that's so much worse and more embarrassing than just asking how they've been. He should've practised this, why didn't he think of practising this, now he's going to have to come up with an apology on the spot and he has no idea and—

"I'm sorry," he mumbles to his lap because, well, that's, like, an apology by itself, right? He can try to improve on it but those two words are already an apology.

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"You don't have anything to apo—"

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"No, no, no, let him cook, I want to hear that," interrupts Ha Si-yeon, lifting a hand to stop Juheon.

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"I'm with Si-yeon on this one."

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He lifts his gaze to shoot Si-yeon an incredulous glare.

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Si-yeon meets Tae-gun's gaze and folds his arms.

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It's very stark, how she totally could save him from this social situation, especially after she so easily rescued Chun-hee, and noticeably isn't. She's ever so busy slowly sipping her tea. Tea is so useful, that way, she was so clever to order some in advance.

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Tae-gun is, predictably, the one who loses that particular game of chicken and lowers his eyes to his lap again. Okay, so, he can just... go through the things he regrets. Even though there's a mountain of them. "I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I stopped responding. I'm sorry I—believed those awful things of you—"

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Wait huh? What awful things?

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Uh. Yeah?

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He's not looking at them so he's not seeing their confusion. He just continues. "I'm sorry I never talked to you guys again, even after—him. I'm sorry I ignored you every time I saw you. I'm sorry I let my—embarrassment—get in my way. I'm sorry I didn't have enough of a spine to—own up to my mistakes. I'm sorry for being a coward, and self-centered, and immature, and pathetic—"

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"Okay hol' up. Tae-gun, the fuck?"

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He looks up again. "What?"

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"I was following you, sort of, but 'pathetic' is a bit much, don'tcha think?"

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Here's the sad smile of a woman who is used to him using that kind of language when describing himself.

No, you know what, he’s barreling headfirst into a communication issue that has an obvious end point and drawing it out if just going to make it worse for everyone.

"Relevant information to this reunion is that Kang Jaeha was an abusive and controlling piece of shit who is still kind of obsessed with and stalking his former partner, and did a whole lot of systematic lying to cut him off from his support network and have him entirely to himself," she says, almost clinically. Tea sip.

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"Hye-jin!"

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"...wait, what?"

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"Yeah, 'wait what' is right, maybe with another 'the fuck' for good measure!"

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"Kang Jaeha," she says, very clearly and with an obvious grudge, "was an abusive and controlling piece of shit, and I am not going to sit here and not mention it while you try to reduce all circumstances to 'it was my fault, and I am terrible, throw stones accordingly.'" This is directed at Tae-gun. Then back to everyone else:

"I am not going to go into specifics on what happened between them, because it's not mine to say, but on my own account, Kang Jaeha has creepily stalked me to my damn house, and we've already had two very exciting and charming chats." That she remembers. There might be more. (She doesn't think so, but the chance is there and she acknowledges it.)

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...well the problem is that now he can't even argue because that man did, in fact, also fuck with her. She's... It's her right to share that. But.

But.

...but now they're going to pity him.

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They're going to pity him, they're going to feel bad for him, when he was the one who hurt them. They're going to know that he's—a broken thing, now, that he's not the Lee Tae-gun they used to know, that he's this, this hollow thing who let some guy mess him up so badly six years ago he's still fucked up about it. He's not going to be able to look—good to them, like someone they could respect and be friends with on an equal footing. He knows, he knows that he's a broken thing, but—but other people don't need to.

He's.

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He's actually kind of mad at Hye-jin, right now.

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"...but—"

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"Juheon so help me God if you finish that sentence I am going to figure out a way to kill you with a teacup."

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Ha. This earns a tiny smile from Hye-jin, who then -

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- looks at Tae-gun and winces.

".... Sorry," she says, looking away. She... did not quite mean to go into a whole tirade about his ex, but he was just going to sit there beating himself up and she hates watching him do that to himself.

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"Okay so is this a war room, are we gonna start brainstorming ways to kill him without leaving evidence—"

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"No."

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"Shut up. Shut up. Don't talk about shit you don't know anything about."

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"...sunbae—"

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"I said shut up," he repeats, leaning back and lifting his gaze to the ceiling before pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes.

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She... wants to comfort him, reach over and pat him or something, but. He's kind of mostly mad at her. There are a thousand excuses she could say, but.

"........ sorry," she repeats, softer now. "I should've... I didn't want you to..." No, stop. "... Sorry."

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Baek Hyun-jae pulls out her phone and scans the QR code on the side of the teapot. "Let's figure out what we're going to order, then? Are we ordering individual dishes or bigger ones to share?"

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"...we should get the kimchi sides to share, at least, Hwi-min's are very good."

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"Sharing's fine with me," murmurs Hye-jin, who is mostly just coasting off of her own long worn social graces. But she recognizes the rescue attempt, and appreciates it. Even if also now she feels terrible and like she should submit for summary stoning.

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They all pick out stuff, and Juheon picks something for Tae-gun when it looks like Tae-gun isn't going to evince an opinion about food.

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The waiter shows up when they press the little bell button on the table, takes their orders, and leaves with a bow.

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...her anxiety might actually kill her.

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Yeah, sorry, Hye-jin is unavailable for providing rescues at this time.

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"...so, Kim Hye-jin, how are you finding Korea...?"

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"Korea doesn't seem too badly backlashed so I'd wager she's enjoying it very much," says Si-yeon, hiking a thumb in Tae-gun's direction.

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Tae-gun opens his eyes to glare at Si-yeon.

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Who blows him a kiss.

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This manages to earn a little giggle from Hye-jin, actually.

"You know, at the time of that meme, we hadn't been. Uh. Doing that particular level of mutual guiding."

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"Oh that is bullshit I have seen that look on Tae-gun's face before—"

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"Hyung I am going to punch your teeth in."

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"He lives, ladies and gentlemen, he lives!"

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Tae-gun covers his face again but this time his grunt is annoyed rather than angry. "I see your personality hasn't gotten any better over the past several years."

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"With a face like mine who needs a good personality?"

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"Okay but you guys totally were mutually guiding by the time Volcanic Range happened, right? There's no way Tae-gun would display his whole entire CD collection to the world like that otherwise—"

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At "CD collection" he clunks the back of his head against the wall, trying to ignore the steam coming out of his ears.

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"Volcanic Range was where we, um. Popped that particular cherry," admits Hye-jin, whose ears are not outputting steam but are a bit pink.

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"You actually fucked in the dungeon! I fucking knew it! Hyung you owe me money for that—"

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"We did not, actually, ever bet on it."

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"We totally did! Like—we would've if—"

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...he clears his throat and scratches his cheek. "Anyway."

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"...should we be talking about, um..."

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"Hye-jin can take some embarrassment as penance."

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"I was the one telling them about it!"

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"I'm a little bit surprised you're not more embarrassed."

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"Of course I'm embarrassed but I'm also mad, so."

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"Besides, out of things to be embarrassed by, 'oh no I was exposed in my Adonis-like naked glory for the world to see after having had hours of sex with a gorgeous woman and helping her destroy a whole-ass named S-rank dungeon in the process and, by the way, my cock is huge' has got to be like top ten for the ego."

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...okay yes when he puts it like that but.

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Embarrassed giggling, while also hiding behind her hands.

"Don't love how weird people on the internet are being, not going to lie," she says, because, actually, being exposed on international television has major downsides and is not just a fun time even if you are very pretty. "Or on not the internet! Do you know how many people have asked to see my breasts, one guy asked me to sign them!"

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"Si-yeon that joke is not actually funny."

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"Come on, noona, have a little faith in me, I wasn't going to!"

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"No but I could hear it take form in your brain."

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"I think that noise was his stomach, actually."

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Okay he's going to start crying, that's what's happening right now, he supposes the entire whole point of the past several months has been an extended experiment in just how many times and in how many different ways the world can make Lee Tae-gun humiliate himself in front of people, especially but not exclusively by crying a lot in front of everyone who'll see it.

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"—hey, Tae-gun, no..."

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Wince.

"... am I allowed to hug you again, or are you still mad at me?" asks Hye-jin, gently.

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He sniffles deeply and shakes his head. "Just pretend it's not happening, I'm tired of acknowledging my emotions."

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"Holy shit Tae-gun that managed to be both incredibly concerning yet at the same time oddly self-aware somehow?"

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"'Incredibly concerning yet at the same time oddly self-aware somehow' is my nom de guerre."

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"Fancy Western words no one has any idea what they mean! Some things really don't change, do they, Tae-gun?"

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Gigglehiccup.

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"Alias or pseudonym," provides Kim Hye-jin, who is a nerd who reads too much. That's a no to hugs, but she can pat him, and does so. "What was the terrible joke? If I don't know it's going to bug me, I promise I won't think less of you no matter how terrible it is."

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"'Can I sign your tits?'"

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This earns a cackle!

"No, they're perfect as they are, thanks!" she giggles.

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Chun-hee makes an embarrassing snorting noise and covers her mouth to try to stifle her laughter.

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"Ha! It was funny!"

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"God I am too old for this shit, two of them was enough."

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?

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"Si-yeon and Yoo-min."

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"I promise my secret extra esper power is comebacks and witticisms, not innuendo," says Hye-jin, whose sincerity is somewhat undercut by the smile and remaining giggles.

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"Noona, since when are you not of a kind with Si-yeon and Yoo-min?"

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"Since I got too old for this shit, come on, keep up."

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"You and Yoo-min-sunbae are the same age."

(Sniffle.)

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"I'm a year older than him, how dare you!"

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"Should you be feeling proud of being old, unnie?"

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"At my age it's what you gotta do, not all of us can be young and beautiful like you."

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"Well I for one am perfectly happy to welcome Kim Hye-jin to the club."

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!!! Yay, approval from his friends!!

"Thank you," she says, delighted.

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"By the way, thank you, noona, the atmo here was getting way too heterosexual, always great to keep it queer."

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"Is, uh, anyone here heterosexual?"

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"No."

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"... I have yet to actually kiss a girl," admits Hye-jin, raising her hand in confession.

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"Is flirting with Kim Hye-jin fair game, Tae-gun?"

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"...why are you asking me?"

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"Is flirting with you fair game, Kim Hye-jin?"

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".... yes..."

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"Duly noted."

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"Is flirting with Tae-gun fair game, Kim Hye-jin?"

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"Oh, more than flirting, please help the man with his backlash, I don't know how he's alive," she snorts.

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"Is flirting with you—"

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"No."

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"Wait, I just remembered! I never let that stop me."

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He sighs heavily.

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"Are you still monogamous, sunbae?"

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"Still?"

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"You never did try to be with anyone else while you were partnered."

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"You know very well why."

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"So it shouldn't apply to people who were your partners in the past, should it?"

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He opens his mouth.

He closes it again.

He blushes.

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"Oh that's some progress, dongsaeng!"

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Hye-jin's just going to giggle behind her hands, thanks. She's given valuable contributions to this topic, and is now going to be embarrassed for a little while, as a treat.

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"Someday. Someday. Someday. I am going to find out what the dreadful secret is with Tae-gun."

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"We're under NDA."

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"Tae-gun could sue us for our spleens if we told."

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"But he wouldn't."

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"Would too."

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"Would you, really?"

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"Stop weaponising the kicked puppy look, Juheon," says Hyun-jae, punching him lightly on the arm.

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He cracks and laughs.

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"What would he even do with so many spleens..." muses Hye-jin. "My NDA also has the oddly specific spleen clause," it doesn't, "so he's got to be doing something with them. Do you have a grisly collection?"

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"I have yet to need to sue someone so my spleen collection is empty."

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She makes that embarrassing snorting noise again.

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It's an adorable snorting noise is what it is. Si-yeon kisses the top of her head.

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"I always feel so privileged when I get to experience Tae-gun having a sense of humour firsthand."

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... but he always has a sense of humor????

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He's really picky about when to display it in public, though!

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"No but for real we cannot let Kim Hye-jin walk out of this restaurant still completely inexperienced in the ways of kissing girls. Actually I'm going to volunteer my midget as tribute," he says, placing both hands on Kim Chun-hee's shoulders.

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She blushes beet red. "I-I-I'm n-not a tribute!"

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He leans close to Chun-hee and whispers, "What if I ask real nice?"

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"I, I wouldn't want to, um," stutters Hye-jin, all in a rush. "It's fine I don't want to put any kind of pressure on anyone and I will figure it out eventually, because I have not been that indoctrinated by the Japanese media!! I'm undoing my brainwashing!!! Promise!!!!!"

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"Don't you think she's just adorable?" Si-yeon continues to whisper to Chun-hee. "And really extremely kissable? Don't you want to kiss her?"

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"I-I-I-Idon'twanthertobeuncomfortable!"

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"Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Are you really going to lesbian sheep that hard?"

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"You could also be tribute, noona."

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"I'm considering my options."

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jfkdsfhyesfdklsgfdggdsosgfye!!!

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"I suggest looking into the drinks menu," Tae-gun says casually. "Fruity and sweet is a good pick."

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....

She pauses and looks at him.

.........

Ah. He's figured out that a drunk Hye-jin is a horny Hye-jin.

"....... this is your vengeance, isn't it," she whispers to Tae-gun.

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He pours himself some tea and brings it up to his lips to start blowing on it. "I think I'm being a loyal partner who's looking out for your interests, here."

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"Okay but it would be really hypocritical of you to egg your partner on and get her to kiss girls and then not kiss any boys tonight, Tae-gun."

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He lifts and narrows his eyes and levels Si-yeon a serious look. "It would be, wouldn't it, hyung?"

Sip sip.

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...wait he did not sign up for the smoulder now he's the one blushing.

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You know what Tae-gun had a great idea when he suggested alcohol! She is going to get herself some!

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Mhmm. Yep. Alcohol. Sounds good to her, too, she'll have the fruity and sweet drink. Of which there are admittedly several, so she picks one at near-random to fit the bill. (She's going to be in such trouble. Everyone here is hot and apparently it's just fine to kiss each other??? WHO GAVE THEM THIS KIND OF POWER.)

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...he does look really hot when the mood strikes him to do—that. Juheon thinks.

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"—Tae-gun, Kim Hye-jin," Hyun-jae says, suddenly thinking of something. She summons a commscreen then goes into her personal storage and looks at Juheon.

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—ah. Yeah.

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?

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?

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She taps a couple more times and the commscreen disappears and two very fancy envelopes materialise in front of her.

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—oh right. Shit. Yeah.

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"...we were wondering if we should... contact you about it. Since it seemed like you," this directed at Tae-gun, "didn't want to talk to us at all. But, um, I guess—we have a bit more context now—and, well, we're here."

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????? is everything okay??????? she's a little concerned???? did somebody else die, she really hopes somebody else didn't die!!!!!!

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Yeah! Yeah!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!

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"...what's with the faces? It's a good thing." She offers them the envelopes. They have Tae-gun and Hye-jin's names on them on one side, and Hyun-jae and Juheon's on the other. "Juheon-ah and I are going to get married in three months. We'd love to have you there."

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Blink blink?

"Oh!" Oh that's so much better than someone dying!!! "Oh, congratulations! I'd be delighted!"

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And then she's aware that she did not successfully perform the happy face to this happy news. Woops. She does not get top scores in being socially competent today.

"Sorry it's been, uh, an interesting six months."

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He nods several times in agreement with that.

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"Yeah, we, uh..." He clears his throat. "After... Tae-hwan..."

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"We figured that... sometimes life's too short, you know? And we're busy espers and—and that's not really an excuse."

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...Tae-gun never even realised they knew Tae-hwan.

They... also lost a dongsaeng. And Tae-gun could've been there for them, and wasn't.

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"Sometimes even when things have gone entirely to shit, you need to make space to be happy anyway," agrees Hye-jin, softly. Yes she has experience in these matters, shut up, she's doing her best, okay, the past six months have been a lot.

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"Yeah. That's right."

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"...if Tae-hwan saw any of us moping he'd ride our asses so instead let's resume the shameless sluttiness we were doing before?"

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Knock knock! Food! And alcohol!

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They should not be sluts in front of the waiter.

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Absolutely not, they are all upstanding citizens who risk their lives for the safety of everyone, very serious bunch, yes indeed, that's them.

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.... Though...

".... probably any tactics talk should take place before any alcohol is imbibed," acknowledges Hye-jin a little awkwardly, after the waiter has departed. She looks at Tae-gun, because, uh. She's trying not to make the literal exact same mistake she did earlier, a second time.

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Ah goddamnit.

"What tactics talk, Hye-jin."

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Wince.

"Your crazy stalker ex that is still a very real problem that will not go away if we pretend he doesn't exist even if we want very much for him to? Sorry???"

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"Does it have to be here. Now."

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"Tae-gun..." Juheon starts, reaching for Tae-gun's hand.

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He pulls his hand away like he's been burnt.

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Then he covers his face. "Sorry. Sorry. I don't mean to snap. Just..."

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"It's okay. I shouldn't have - I did the combat esper thing of 'see problem, solve problem' earlier, and I shouldn't have, and I'm sorry. It's more complicated than that. No, it doesn't have to happen now, but it should be a conscious decision to not, instead of just. Not."

And Tae-gun, if left to his own devices, was just going to not. She doesn't say this, but it's pretty clearly heard anyway.

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...this is awkward as hell but actually they're all of them combat espers so—they get it.

"Sunbae, what do you need?"

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He barks out a humourless laugh. "What I need is—is—" What even is it? He needs his time with Jaeha to not have been a lie. He needs the man he loves to not be a monster. He needs the people he loves to not be plotting to murder each other.

Actually he really feels like that last one should be achievable!!!! He has it on good authority that most people's loved ones aren't plotting to murder each other even a little bit!!!!!

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"...too many contradictory things and something's gotta give and it's gonna hurt a lot when it does?"

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"It'd be great if it only hurt a lot then, actually."

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Wince.

"... Sorry," she repeats, again, but that feels so useless and stupid when she keeps being the one to bring up this exact problem and hurt him. ... It's Kang Jaeha's fault, ultimately, but. She does keep making the issue be an issue now, which. ... Combat esper.

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"... It doesn't have to be now," she repeats, looking away. "Really. I'm - sorry I keep pushing."

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He grits his teeth. "No, you know what? Fine. Fine! You want tactics talk? Let's talk tactics.

"Kang Jaeha's publicly known powers are only a fraction of what he can do. He can create fully immersive illusions that are indistinguishable from reality even in retrospect. Everything you can perceive, he can fake. He can fake the feeling of your heartbeat and the breath in your lungs, he can fake the feeling of having just woken up, he can fake the feeling of being in a dream."

He pours the soju he ordered into a cup and starts drinking it. "He can let your brain do most of the detailwork, he can make you come up with a whole conversation in your head and play it out without overseeing it at all."

More alcohol. "No other mind esper on record is known to be able to detect his work, counter him, or prevent him from affecting you. He can completely remove any other esper's or dungeon's effects from your mind, and shield you absolutely."

More alcohol. "He can erase short term memories if he catches them as they form. He can't directly make you feel any emotions but he can bring the ones you're already feeling more or less into focus, and pull at them to try to reshape them at the edges. He can't mind read you but he can tell everything you're feeling, and he gets feedback on a lot of major things, like whether you're looking at a face and whether it's someone you recognise or whatever."

More. "The closer he is to you, physically, the better he is at details, but he literally could make up your entire environment and not even be in the same building as you."

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At some point in the middle of that Chun-hee lifted her hands to cover her mouth and she's now just staring at him.

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"That's—you cannot be serious, Tae-gun."

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"That's S-rank."

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"Yeah."

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"...does that mean..."

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"That he used his powers on me? Oh yes. And on all of you. Not that any of us can tell because, again, there is literally not a single other esper who could look into our brains and figure out what was real and what he put in there!"

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His voice cracks and he looks away. "I—I thought—he convinced me. That you guys—that—"

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Oh. That's. That's what he meant, earlier. When he apologised for believing things...

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Yeah.

She doesn't interrupt and she doesn't contradict him, she just sits there quietly looking grim, wishing she weren't partially responsible for her partner's pain, and also that she could hold him.

She's so sorry, Tae-gun.

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"And now you may be thinking, gosh, Tae-gun, isn't it a bit stupid of you to still care about him? Isn't it kind of dumb that you love him? Aren't you a little daft?"

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"Tae-gun, no."

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"The thing is." He downs the rest of his cup, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, then fills it back up. "The thing is—"

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"—he loved me. He loved me so much. He loved me more than I thought it was possible to love someone. He made me happy every day, he made me feel like I could do anything, be anything. He made me feel like the most important person in the world. He fucking smiled at me when he saw me, like I was the fucking morning sun or some shit." He drinks more. "He listened to me, paid attention to me, he was interested in everything I was interested in. He supported me—I thought—he wanted me to be stronger—I thought. He always made time for me, he always made me his number one priority, he needed me.

"And I loved him too!" Alcohol! He should not be drinking this much alcohol when they haven't even touched their food. "He was smart, he was brilliant. He was insightful, he understood people in a way I never could, and he could keep up with me even about the things he wasn't so good at. He was hilarious—you guys know that. He was charming, he was nice, he was fun, sex with him was mind-blowing—he was—" He breaks, here, choking on the words, the words Jaeha repeated to him so many times. "...he was my prince charming.

"And he needed me. He needed me because, because—"

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He downs the rest of his second glass and slams it onto the table and lowers his eyes to his lap again. "Because his backlash is depression."

His voice suddenly grows cold, monotonic, losing all of the agitation and emotion it'd been carrying. "He lost—loses—pieces of himself. One by one. Starting with joy. When we first met, he hadn't felt joy in years. He hadn't felt happiness in years. He loses his—sympathy, his ability to feel happy when others are happy and sad when they're sad." He's listing these one by one like he's reading them out of cue cards, unmoved. "He loses his ability to find things interesting. He loses his ability to feel anything positive at all, and he forgets what that's even like, why he'd even want it. He gets completely anhedonic, and has no reason to ever do anything. Then he loses his fire—he can't get angry, can't get upset. And then—sensation. Can't feel things. Can't feel pain. His senses get duller, he can't taste things. He loses the drive to eat, or sleep, or move, or breathe. He dies.

"Jaeha's dead. My Jaeha, the man I loved—" he takes a deep, shuddering breath, "—still love—is dead. There's a—thing—animating his corpse—"

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"Doesn't he have a partner?"

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"I thought so. I thought he was over me. I thought he existed, and was happy, somewhere else. And if he isn't—then—then he's not my Jaeha. He's, he's that thing. He let himself become that thing, and that thing doesn't want anything.

"He needed me because I was the first person who ever let him exist."

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There are so many things she could say in response to that. 'No one made him sell pieces of his soul so he could keep a better hold on his boyfriend,' or 'Love and need are two very different things and love is not entrapment,' or 'He could stop at literally any time,' or 'He could try solving his problems with things besides his mind control powers,' or, or, or -

She doesn't say any of them. She keeps her hands folded quietly in her lap, and she looks at them, and she lets her partner grieve for the man he's lost.

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"I'll accept that hug now," he mumbles to Hye-jin.

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Oh, he is getting so hugged. Just, just, the most hugged this man can possibly be, like he's never been hugged in his life and she's trying to make up for it with sheer determination. Hug.

"Thank you," she says softly. Followed by another repetition of, "I'm sorry."

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He has no idea how to respond to either of those things, so he just won't.

He's not crying, though. He's not sure why. But he's not.

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"...so the reason you didn't get a partner all these years—"

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"The reason I didn't get a partner all these years is that I have fucking PTSD about my shitty ex, yes."

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His current partner winces and pets him. She resumes her earlier habit of not saying things. She is a dispenser of hugs and pets, that is her job.

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"Okay before we move anywhere with that let's actually eat before Tae-gun gives himself actual brain damage from drinking that much on an empty stomach."

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Good idea Si-yeon.

"...by the way, the NDA I'm under about his powers and backlash would bankrupt Quasar and leave us all unemployed if he sued."

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"Holy shit Tae-gun do you want to maybe get all of the bombs out of the way?"

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"I think that was all."

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"I do think we can get him for some criminal actions and have a decent case in court for extenuating circumstances," says Hye-jin, ever practical. "He's gone after me in public twice now, I've sent several cease and desist letters to both him and Lucid, and I've got an off shore server with audio and video files and, and, food should come first I'm bad at this I'm sorry."

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He winces, but he's said his piece. They're all smart cookies, they should be able to put the rest of it together. To know that Tae-gun doesn't want his Jaeha to die just because there's a monster wearing his skin, doesn't want his Jaeha to be sent to prison just because the thing animating his body committed crimes. 

His Jaeha doesn't deserve that.

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"Audio and video—"

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She covers his mouth. "Food first."

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"Food first," she agrees, reaching over to grab something to munch on. "I, uh, am wearing a mic at all times, though. Tae-gun too. So." Awkward munch.

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"What, all times—"

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"We are not wearing microphones while having sex." ...his house is fully video monitored everywhere but he does not need to bring that up either.

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"Awww I'm glad you still know me so well even after all this time."

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"So what were you saying about not being lumped together with Si-yeon and Yoo-min again...?"

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"Oh shush you. I'm sure I'll come up with a good comeback later but for now shush you."

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Hye-jin giggles, then pushes food Tae-gun-wards. C'mon, man who has had way too much alcohol in a short period of time, have calories that are not liquid.

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Must he. He was moping and being hugged. That was nice.

...fine.

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Thank you, Tae-gun!

Hye-jin is going to focus on eating food and being nestled next to and providing comfort to Tae-gun, who needs many hugs right now. She can't promise she won't venture into the realm of Forbidden Topics, but she will at least try and have any chill about it.

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"So, um, how'd you guys meet Tae-hwan?"

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"Oh he started coming to the meetups."

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"...wasn't he straight?"

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"He and Woo-young were not platonic."

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Meetups being, uh, probably from context, a specifically queer Quasar meetup thing? Neat. She will probably end up going to them, despite her efforts to also have a life outside of her guild. ... Look, she'd be better at it if it weren't for the mind control stalker ex, but the mind control stalker ex means that she can't really be picky with her allies right now.

Nibble nibble on the food, and a quiet Hye-jin who is still not supposed to have the talking stick, because she'd probably inevitably start trying to talk tactics. Again.

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"Guess not but..."

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"...to be fair I think he was not bullshitting at all when he said Woo-young was his exception, I tried so hard to seduce him."

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"Maybe you're just ugly."

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"Sure, and maybe the sky is green, now back on Earth..."

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"You know, good for you, Si-yeon. More people could benefit from this level of unearned undeserved confidence."

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"Oh, please, noona. I'm so pretty I even managed to convince Tae-gun to kiss me tonight!"

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"TBD."

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"Careful, he's going to not out of spite, at that rate," snorts Hye-jin.

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"You wouldn't, would you, Tae-gun-ah? You also want to kiss me, right?"

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"T. B. D."

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"Wow."

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"How about me? Will you kiss me?"

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"...I thought you and Hyun-jae-sunbae were exclusive." Outside the random flirting with people here and there.

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"We're monogamish, and I feel like tonight is a great excuse for me to kiss pretty girls and for Juheon-ah to kiss pretty boys."

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Oh no she's being looked at by a pretty girl, better stuff her face over it!!!!!!!! HOW DOES THIS WORK she's not drunk enough for this, where's that fruity alcohol...?

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Right over there on the table!

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Yep just going to completely casually drink this and be a totally normal person who definitely understands how normal social cues work.

"I can feel you looking at me. With your eyes," she grumbles.

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"I'd think it should be easy to feel, what with how I'm not even trying to hide it."

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".... be gentle, it's my first time..." grumbles Hye-jin wryly, with maximum self awareness, and then she's going to hide by eating some more.

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"Gentle is not my forte. Maybe Chun-hee could get you started."

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Nope she is also stuffing her face with both food and alcohol.

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"Soooo... temperature check on that being kissed thing?"

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"Hmmm. I think plausibly yes."

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"I see, you're just ignoring the little guy again, tryin'a put him down, I see how it is."

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He gives Si-yeon a look again. "Maybe if you ask nicely."

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...on God, it's been years and Tae-gun can still mess with him.

"I'd love to be allowed to kiss you, Tae-gun-ah. You're so hot, and so pretty, and so smart and competent and talented and—"

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"Down, boy. I'll consider it."

Ohhh there's the alcohol, he's feelin' it, yep.

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Okay, but it's pretty hot to watch Tae-gun be all - that - aimed at someone else. ... That's not the alcohol, it hasn't had time to metabolize, that's just a new thing she's learning about herself.

Anyway yes um. She's going to attempt to have fun tonight, and maybe kiss at least one girl, and will try not to add any further talk of tactics or Kang Jaeha to tonight's schedule. The really important stuff is out there, now. This was a lot for Tae-gun, and he absolutely should get to enjoy having his friends back without his partner breathing down his neck about operational efficiency.

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Well, in addition to the girl that was actively making bedroom eyes at her, she's got this one other girl who's getting blushier and blushier with the alcohol and blinking doefully at Hye-jin and looking away in embarrassment whenever Hye-jin catches the look.

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Awwwww, she's so adorable.

After enough drinks in Hye-jin, she can absolutely solve the lesbian sheep problem. By very politely and very directly asking Chun-hee if she would like to please sit next to her. From there it is very straightforward to get the adorable woman into her lap, very sincerely thank her for the service of being the first girl to kiss her, and then, well. Kiss her.

She and Chun-hee turn out to be compatible, so it's as nice as she expected.

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Meanwhile, Tae-gun... needs a moment.

Hye-jin was the first person he kissed in five years. And then there was Woo-young. And he feels like he should be making his decisions more carefully, making sure he stands by them, making sure he's not making a mistake or doing something he's going to regret, but... but...

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...Si-yeon is pouting at him adorably, and...

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...Juheon is smiling at him shyly, and...

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...he's drunk and horny. He's drunk, and horny, and Hye-jin is kissing a pretty girl, and being touched by two separate people he's compatible with actually feels really nice—he's not as compatible with Woo-young and he never did fuck both Woo-young and Hye-jin at the same time so he didn't know—and anyway the end result is that he's drunk and making out with his two ex-partners at the same time and actually dreadfully horny, really, he hasn't gotten rid of his backlash, and they're in public but they're in a private booth and—

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And Hyun-jae is overseeing all of this and egging them on and teasing them and making sure everyone's having fun and since she's the only one who is not currently occupied with makeouts she's the one who has the idea of suggesting they move this party somewhere they'll be more comfortable.

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... Oh right! Yes! Good thought! Thank you Hyun-jae! Um. ... Hye-jin can totally cover the bill?

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They're all loaded, it's fine, Hyun-jae can drop a few hundred thousand won on the table, call a waiter, then request a teleport (which she buys off Woo-young directly, rather than use the allowance they have for work) to her and Juheon's place before the waiter can arrive and catch the six espers in the act.

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The change in location disorients Tae-gun for a moment and then he—

—realises he's at someone's front porch and he was just making out with two guys at the same time in public and now he's even more in public and his brain might be mildly nonfunctional.

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...he's so cute.

Juheon unlocks the door and pulls Tae-gun inside by the hand.

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(Some people are starting to have guesses about what Lee Tae-gun's backlash is.)

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Oh. That's neatly sorted. Okay, cool.

And Tae-gun is fine underneath the embarrassment...? Yeah, he seems fine. Also very cute. And Chun-hee, who she's taking some responsibility for because she's in the middle of domming her: also fine?

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Fine! Still embarrassed but in a much less unproductive way than Tae-gun. She's more than happy to be led inside.

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Led? No. She's being gently carried like a princess, thank you. Hye-jin's enhanced esper strength isn't the same as Tae-gun's, but it can absolutely serve this noble purpose.

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Si-yeon follows after them and closes the door behind himself then skips over to Tae-gun to kiss his cheek.

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Hyun-jae and Juheon's place is a bit bigger than Tae-gun's, and a lot more geared towards hosting. The dining room is bigger and has a much larger table, the kitchen is separate from it, and the living room has more sofas and chairs arranged in a circle. And upstairs, they have one specific bedroom that has a massive bed. Massive enough for all of them, even.

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...why do they have such a big bed. What do they do with such a big bed. What are they about to do ahhhhh.

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Si-yeon stops in front of him and says, "Tae-gun? Dom me."

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...oh.

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"No."

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Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.

"I, I meant—Tae-gun-ah, I'd—"

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"That's sir, for you."

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Gulp.

"Y-yes, sir."

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Oh no, that's really hot???

She gently sets her little princess onto the great big bed and smiles at her. "Do you want to be free to watch the show, or may I distract you?" she purrs, playfully.

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Aaaah?

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"Say 'safeword' if you want out, lovely?"

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Nodnodnodnod.

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To Hye-jin: "She's going to be bad at saying words but she's very vocal otherwise."

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Aaaaaaaaaah.

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"Noted! Then may I request assistance with her, pretty please?"

Because a hard no for Hye-jin is accidentally mistreating anyone, and she would appreciate some help with her first time both with and domming a girl! That... she admittedly met today! (She is making such decisions today, truly.)

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"I'd love nothing more."


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Tae-gun recognises that being mean to Si-yeon immediately after Si-yeon said "dom me" is literally doing exactly what Si-yeon's told him to do, which pisses him off, and the fact that taking out his irritation on Si-yeon is also doing that exact same thing pisses him off more, so he concludes that the only appropriate punishment for the cocky blond is not letting him get any release tonight. He'll have to live with the consequences of his decisions.

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Juheon cheerfully aids and abets Tae-gun in the torture of Si-yeon, and also makes sure Tae-gun himself will have a good time. He hadn't actually been planning on joining in on the main event but when he touched Tae-gun earlier he noticed Tae-gun was pretty backlashed and seeing him like this right now makes him realise that the situation is dire. Even if he and Hye-jin have only been having sex since Volcanic Range, the fact that Tae-gun is in this state... well...

...he supposes he now knows that Tae-gun just literally did not get any guiding over these five years. So, he's going to do his part.

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s i - y e o n  g r e a t l y  r e g r e t s  h i s  d e c i s i o n s

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Hyun-jae for her part doesn't join in on the main event. She helps Hye-jin and soothes Chun-hee and makes sure the boys are not going to destroy the bed and brings everyone water and so on, so forth. Her goal tonight is helping all of them have some fun.

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Hye-jin is sincerely appreciative of Hyun-jae’s guidance, and is similarly devoted to making sure everyone present has a good time. Though, mostly her part of that job is gleefully enjoying the many sounds Chun-hee can be persuaded to make. The side show from the boys is pretty great, too, and she can appreciate the operational efficiency of Tae-gun getting guided from two sources at once.

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her life is great actually

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And eventually they sleep.

After they sleep, they wake up. Or, well, at least one of them wakes up, and...

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...remembers last night.

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"Good morning," mumbles Juheon sleepily from where he's sandwiched between Tae-gun and Hyun-jae.

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Hye-jin is... somewhere... in the pile of people, and not awake enough to register anything more than that, a hangover, and general coziness.

"Tae-gun I think they missed you," she mumbles, already attuned to the sound of his panic. Is that her being summoned? That sounds like she's being summoned...

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Well he is most certainly panicking right now and, and they're everywhere there is no direction he can't look that doesn't have one of them in he can't hide he'll just lie back down and cover his face with a pillow and scream into it quietly.

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Si-yeon jerks awake with a muffled "the spiders!" cry then tries to remember where he is and...

...notices he is incredibly pent up. That is the first thing he notices, courtesy of his morning wood.

aughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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???? the spiders???? why is that what...?

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No, you know what, nevermind. She doesn't want to know about any spider based and possibly sexy nightmares, actually.

Why are the boys so high maintenance, this is so cozy though...

(She supposes Juheon isn't high maintenance. This neatly explains why Hyun-jae is marrying him. Hyun-jae is wise. Hye-jin learned this very well last night.)

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Okay, which way is the panicking partner? Thataway? K. Can scootch. She gives Chun-hee (who she was cuddling) a little kiss on the forehead, then gets to scootching. C'mere, partner, everything's okay, it's just an orgy with all of your once-estranged friends. They missed you!

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Chun-hee is still sleeping soundly.

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As is Hyun-jae.

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argh argh argh argh argh argh

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"Tae-gun—sir—may I—"

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"No."

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nghhhhhhhhh

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ahhhhhhhh

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This earns a delighted giggle from Hye-jin, which is then followed by snuggles to her partner.

"You're cute," she mumbles into his skin. "I like your friends."

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"We like you too," Juheon says, grinning.

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Yeah okay the snuggling is nice but he is going to continue to hide under the pillow because ARGH what have they DONE

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They handled a lot of his backlash, and introduced Hye-jin to the wonders of kissing girls! Among other things! She learned many things about herself last night!

She'll just soothingly pet Tae-gun and wait for his emotions to settle down a bit. He is entirely free to hide under the pillow for as long as he likes. Pet pet pet.

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Si-yeon, who's lying "upside down" relative to the others and nestled between Juheon and Tae-gun's legs (it helps that he's tiny) kisses Tae-gun's shin. ...and squirms in place a bit.

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He sits up abruptly. "I need to go take a shower."

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"May I come with?"

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He gives Si-yeon a look. "Are you sure you want to come into a shower with me?"

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meep

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—wait he's not in his own house. "Uh, hyung, is it okay if I—"

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"Tae-gun, you don't need to ask for permission."

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Sitting up does unfortunately send him out of snuggling range of Hye-jin, who pouts a little. ... Then is moved to giggling at the antics.

"Have fun. I'm getting snuggles." She's not sure from whom yet, but. There are a whole lot of people here and surely one of them will cuddle her.

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Alright cool off he goes he feels sticky.

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Hyun-jae's woken up just in time to appreciate the view. "What's he running from?"

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"All of us."

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"I could snuggle you," Si-yeon pipes up, "but, um." Gesture nether-wards.

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"Oh, I volunteer as tribute."

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"Excellent, thank you," says Hye-jin, who scootches accordingly. This involves climbing over Juheon, who is admittedly a gigantic mountain of a man, but, well. He's a teddy bear mountain.

Snuggles with Hyun-jae, eee. "And, um, thank you for also..." Generally being really cool and responsible and overseeing things so that everything would go well? She appreciates this on a logistical level.

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"Anytime, babe."

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Chun-hee mumbles in her sleep.

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Her Si-yeon can just go snuggle.

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Okay, good, then Hye-jin will settle down for comfy snuggles and try not to get too concerned about Tae-gun.

.......

............ okay maybe now it's her turn to be embarrassed. She is not nearly so dramatic about it as her partner, but, but. ... She is going to hide just a little.

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What should she be embarrassed about? Is it that she's now sandwiched between two very hot, very naked people?

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"...hey Juheon can you—"

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"You're gonna need to wait for Tae-gun."

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"Damnit."

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Yeah, it's that! Being sandwiched between two very hot very naked people, while also herself being very naked! When she literally met everyone in this bed yesterday. It is quite a jump to go from socially enforced monogamy to, to, um. This. She regrets nothing but goodness.

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Well, even if Si-yeon won't get release from his torture, he can scoot himself and Chun-hee over closer to Juheon to get snuggles, too.

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Pet pet.

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She opens her eyes and turns around, blinking blearily. "Mrrr?"

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"Morning, sweetness."

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"M'rng," she agrees, helping with the scooting. "...whn's r frst dngn tday?"

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"Eleven-thirty."

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"Mmk."

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Oh no what if she forgot - wait. Wait, no. She knows this answer. It's at 1 PM. Because they have a weirdly light schedule on account of the confluence. And, demonstrably, there were no emergencies while they were, um. Busy.

Anyway yes back to hiding. Ahem.

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Meanwhile, Tae-gun is trying to rapid fire run his brain through the embarrassment procedures so that he can actually think about what happened yesterday so, without further ado:

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There. Done. OK. So.

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Juheon was his first partner, when he was a baby esper, right after manifesting, and he does not want to think about the time he manifested thanks muchly. He had been a virgin prior to that and after that he was very much not in far more ways than he knew were possible at the time and he did not have enough maturity to deal with that in any way. Juheon was kind and nice and patient and they were exclusive because Tae-gun did not want anyone else to ever see him the way he got when under backlash.

His second partner Goh Ipsae, who decided to stop being a dungeon esper and became a civil contractor, was okay with non-exclusivity, but Juheon had partnered Hyun-jae and they were exclusive at the time.

His third partner was Si-yeon and same, Tae-gun was still very much not looking to let more people know.

His fourth partner...

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And then his fifth partner Kim Jae-pil lasted exactly two weeks and Tae-gun could not bring himself to fuck him because Tae-gun was broken.

Is he still broken...?

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Yeah, he is, but in new and more interesting ways he's sort of on the mend? And... he hates it, hates that it's true, but Hye-jin is the reason why. His partner broke him, and his partner is fixing him. He doesn't have any—agency in all of this. It just kind of happened. If it weren't for Hye-jin he'd still be wallowing in his pit of misery, if he hadn't been killed by something this confluence already.

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And then Woo-young... He'd be lying if he said he hadn't noticed the latent sexual tension between them. Woo-young was the only person he'd ever allowed in, ever shown his vulnerable sides, other than his partners. And Woo-young was the person he'd been most vulnerable to, who'd seen him in every possible awful and awkward and embarrassing situation. If Woo-young had expressed any interest while Tae-gun was backlashed, Tae-gun would... probably have accepted his advances. He's kind of not sure why Woo-young never did but in retrospect... he's thankful. He's also not sure why he's thankful, but Woo-young probably knows, and that was probably why he didn't do it. Woo-young knows Tae-gun much, much better than Tae-gun knows himself.

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Then he met his hyungs again and—

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They don't hate him. They, they don't want him to leave forever, they, they don't think he's awful. That he sucks. They still, they like him. They missed him.

He missed them so, so, so much, he never realised how much, he wasn't letting himself realise how much because he didn't need more sources of misery in his life. They just, just—they care about him. And so do Hye-jin and Woo-young, and even Park Yoo-min and Choi Seungjoo, but, but Woo-young was right, he does love his friends. He does care very deeply about them. They make his life easier, they make it more worth living. And they just, they're just, they're taking him back. They're accepting him, broken as he is.

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And when he thinks about it that way, does—all that embarrassing stuff—does it even matter? He's making himself more vulnerable—but that's not bad. It's not bad. When, when people are, when they care about you. It's not bad to be vulnerable with them. They won't take advantage of you. Other people aren't—that guy—they aren't—

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They aren't Kang Jaeha.

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...he's making himself more vulnerable around Chun-hee and Hyun-jae. They didn't know about his backlash before, he's pretty sure, and—they might guess it now.

That's... probably not bad. Who cares about the NDA? Would he have sued Juheon or Si-yeon if they'd shared his backlash? Obviously not. He'd have been heartbroken and devastated but he wouldn't have done that. It's just a formality. And—same for their partners. Same for all of his friends, really.

Could he tell Yoo-min and Seungjoo? He probably could. He thinks he trusts them. No, he just does trust them.

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He doesn't know what to do with that.

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There's a loud knock on the door.

"Tae-gun, I need to take a piss, are you gonna take long?"

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...okay what he's going to do with that is punch Ha Si-yeon's teeth in.

"Did you see how many other bathrooms there are in this house?"

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"They're so faaaaaaaaaar."

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"I'm done anyway," he sighs, turning the water off and stepping out of the shower to start drying himself off.

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The doorknob rattles. "Why'd you lock it?"

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"So that a certain dick-sized midget doesn't barge in and decide to take a piss while I'm still in the shower. Chill." But yes he can dry himself quickly and then let Ha Si-yeon in while he steps out.

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Not before Si-yeon gives him a quick peck on the lips before shutting the door.

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"Hi," murmurs Hye-jin a little shyly, from Hyun-jae's arms. "Good morning."

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And then after a deep breath she peeks up at him to confirm: "Are you okay? I-I know I still owe you a proper apology, and I can give it right now if you want but it should be on your terms not mine and what's most important is if you're okay and I'm babbling oh no."

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His brain takes a second to catch up because there are four hot people lying in bed in front of him and they're people he likes whom he missed and some kind of barrier in his brain got lifted around the idea of considering them to be sex objects and that's doing things to him and—

Wait, ok, time out. Hye-jin said words. "Good morning," he starts with as he replays his auditory memory. "I'm okay. Apol—?"

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"Oh."

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"I don't want to get into that right now," he sighs, sitting cross-legged on the bed.

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Nod nod nod.

"Okay," she agrees, softly. "... Then, um. Can I come snuggle...?"

Hyun-jae snuggles are great and all, but, um. ... She misses her partner.

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"Yeah. Of course."

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D'awwwwwwww.

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Nod.

"Thank you," she says to Hyun-jae, who she... Expects not to take it personally...? Yeah it's fine. Okay. Then she's going to go crawl over and nestle into Tae-gun's arms. They kind of didn't spend much of last night together at all, so, uh. ... Yeah, she missed her partner.

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Yeah no she's fine she can go to her boyfriend's partner's arms.

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Yeah, he... kinda did miss her too, actually?

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...ah fuck.

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Eeeeee snuggles with Tae-gun, yay.

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He's getting a bit of déjà vu.

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Chun-hee looks up at him from where she's snuggling Hyun-jae's other side. "Did you sleep well, sunbae?"

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He scratches the back of his neck and looks away (while leaning on Hye-jin). "I slept okay. You... don't need to speak so formally."

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Blink.

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Blink.

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Blink.

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"And, um, neither do you, Hye-jin," he adds.

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".... So it'd be your name or, um, oppa?" shyly confirms the half-Japanese person who has not actually broken into informality with non-family in Korean.

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Si-yeon steps out of the bathroom and blinks at everyone's stunned shock. "Aw man why do cool things keep happening when I'm away, what happened, what happened?"

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"Tae-gun just told Chun-hee and Hye-jin they could be informal with him."

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"...holy shit!" he says, hopping onto the bed and bouncing on it. "Is that why he's so red? Did Kim Hye-jin just call him oppa or something?"

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"Right in one."

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"Technically, I was confirming if I should, because Korean is my second language and your honorifics are strange and complex." And somewhat incestuous, but she won't go there, that would be rude. Probably.

She instead nestles closer to Tae-gun to hide after saying this.

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"Somehow I don't think Tae-gun would be that red if I called him oppa."

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"You know, somehow I don't think so, either."

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"Ok but hol' up—"

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"Ha Si-yeon, think long and hard about what you're about to ask."

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"Long and hard, you say."

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"You know what, I don't care anymore, if you wanna say things that'll dig your grave go ahead, you're on your own."

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Juheon laughs and kisses the top of Hyun-jae's head.

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"I see why you have been so merciless to him," says Hye-jin to Tae-gun, solemnly.

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"It's revenge."

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"...what for!"

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"Dunno, I'm sure you'll do something that I'll want to get revenge on you for." He uncrosses one of his legs and stretches it to press one foot against Si-yeon's crotch.

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He convulses and has to bite the back of his hand to not moan.

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He looks down. "Um. Hyun-jae-sunbae, would—"

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"Oh, for the love of—yes, Tae-gun, you can be informal with me too, you have got to be the only person I know who gets so hung up on this after literally fucking someone's fiancé."

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"I think most people who fuck other people's fiancés actually aren't informal at all with them."

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"I hereby grant you permission to be informal with my future wife, Tae-gun."

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...okay it does make her squirm a little, being called "future wife" like that.

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He loves her very much.

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"Oppa, we should probably, um..."

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"Wha? What time is—oh. Shit." He looks at Tae-gun, and then down at Tae-gun's foot which is still where it is. "Tae-gun—"

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"What? Surely being a bit horny shouldn't get in your way at work, should it."

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He stares at Tae-gun. He stares at Tae-gun and he can't even argue because he knows what Tae-gun's backlash is.

"You are actually pure evil."

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He presses a bit more then stops. "Have your fun, I'm not your dom."

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"Thank God—"

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"Hye-jin and I should probably get going, too, we have four dungeons scheduled for today and we should go over them once more."

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"Just four small B-ranks?"

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"...well, they're A-ranks."

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“Yeah, if they were B-ranks we’d be splitting them,” agrees Hye-jin, who then remembers their work ethic is insane. “… um.” She coughs. “We’d better get going, yeah.”

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She's from the samn damn planet as Tae-gun.

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He thinks they're very cute together.

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So they all keep bantering and poking fun at each other as they get dressed. When they're about ready to go Chun-hee says, "I'm glad we get to hang out with you again, oppa. And, um, it was, um, very nice meeting you, Kim Hye-jin."

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"We've got some unfinished conversations and five years of gossip to catch up on. And Tae-gun? I'll be waiting for you at the next meetup and I hope you know you don't want me to be cross."

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"Yes, noona," he sighs.

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Giggle.

“It was my deepest pleasure to get to know you as well, Kim Chun-hee-sunbae,” purrs Hye-jin, who absolutely means biblically.

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Then she brightens from seductress and addresses everyone else. “Thank you for having me, you’re all absolutely wonderful. I’m glad Tae-gun… oppa,” she’s not blushing you’re blushing shut up, “has such good friends.”

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"By the way, Tae-gun?" Si-yeon says, and without waiting for an answer he gets on his tiptoes and puts a hand behind Tae-gun's head to pull Tae-gun's face to his and kiss him deeply. "I missed you."

And he teleports away.

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"Should I do that, too?" Juheon wonders.

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"Let's go home?" he asks Hye-jin, sounding a bit desperate.

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Home, is it?

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Giggle. “Yeah,” agrees Hye-jin, giving a last wave, and then they can teleport away (to Tae-gun’s house) too.

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Excellent perfect good yes now they can talk about dungeons to decompress, yes?

(Why are all of his friends extroverts. He supposes Chun-hee isn't exactly but EVERYONE ELSE.)

(Well, not Hye-jin either.)

(Why did his brain not automatically classify her as a friend.)

(He knows the answer and he will instead not think about it.)

Anyway! Dungeons! Yes? Good.


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She gets the emergency notification, and it's louder and more insistent than the usual ones. A large fraction of all psychic espers on Earth are getting similar notifications at the same time—if nothing else, to be on standby. They won't all accept it, and some will probably give up quickly, but that's all the more reason for as many of them to be called in as possible.

Nightmare's finally appeared.

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Yeah. It was only a matter of time.

… she sends a message to Woo-young, since he might not officially be in the loop on this. Recent partner, different country, all that. He probably knows already, but it’ll help her future anxiety spirals if she makes sure he knows now.

Nightmare’s up, I will be on duty for it.
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i just saw the notification

you don't do in-dungeon work, right? just victim work?

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Correct.
I might end up doing some mental shielding for the rescue teams, but there’s no reason for me to step into the dungeon.
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right

good luck

if there's any way i can help you know where to find me

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Yes.

Then she hesitates and eventually, after some deliberation, sends:

You're just a teleport away :)


And then off she goes to do her job.
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It’s not the first time she’s dealt with victims of Nightmare, actually. It always pops up during a confluence, but it likes to snatch victims between them as well, and, well. Anyone that is successfully rescued from it sure does have a lot of trauma to work through. All of her patients were years out, their traumas long entrenched and, since they were seeing her, debilitating. Hopefully, with her waiting right outside to treat victims, they’ll be spared the sleepless nights and PTSD.

That’s the dream, anyway. For now she will be on standby while rescue teams are assembled, to see if her particular brand of emotional suppression will be needed for the rescues themselves.

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Nowadays, no one really tries to kill Nightmare, anymore. There just isn't any point. It's achieved apex predator status, its core has never been found, it's too large and its layout too inconsistent for proper exploration, and it's... evil. It has the highest esper kill rate out of all dungeons on record, it's extremely hard to predict when it's about to seal itself and then going back to the exit is a race against the clock during which you know you're inevitably leaving victims behind so that you yourself can survive, lots of espers have traumatic experiences with the entire surrounding context. Survivor's guilt is common, and Nightmare does seem to try to tempt espers by showing them victims that they could save if they take a small detour just as the dungeon's sealing itself...

The teams that are sent in are consequently always small: one or two psychic espers for the shielding and rescue proper, one esper who can find the victims, and if necessary an esper who can find the exit. Teleportation does work inside, but distances are inconsistent and constantly shifting, and that makes most types of it unreliable or more expensive than they could be. So when Hana gets there, there are a handful of such small teams congregated already, and two teams are inside; Nightmare doesn't waste time, and is constantly and continuously kidnapping victims without stopping. The only reason people aren't told to immediately evacuate its environs is that... it's been tried, and when that happens, Nightmare just seals itself quickly and quietly and goes elsewhere, and on net, more people are lost.

Nightmare is evil.

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It really, really is.

She inputs her credentials into the comm screen system, then retrieves, fills out, and puts on a name tag, then waits for someone to come get her and put her where it would be best. She is a tiny cog in a great big machine that’s trying to reduce the harm this thing does, and she will do her part.

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The support staff notices her arrival quickly and a non-esper comes to talk to her. "Ms. Fugimura Hana?" they ask in English. The dungeon is in Germany, at the moment, and the lingua franca in emergencies in Western Europe is English.

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"Yes," agrees Fugimura Hana, in English, though her English also isn't great. (She successfully labeled herself in English along with Japanese, though. It was likely she was going to be somewhere where the emergency language would be English.)

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"Come with me to a tent, please?" They have translation software, so if she wants to speak Japanese she can, too. "I've read an overview of your power; is there anything in specific you need from us to use it most efficiently?"

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Nod. She does make her request in Japanese, though she caught... most.... of what he said. (Why hasn't she studied English more? Stupid.)

"Estimated time since the victim was taken, and physical touch with the victim. I can work without either, but they improve operational efficiency. Holding hands is fine."

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"Understood. Only one victim at a time?" Each team usually only does one but multiple teams can occasionally come out at the same time. "How much time do you need per victim?"

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Technically she can do multiple people at once, but when it comes to trauma it's really really important to get it right, so:

"One at a time. Ten to twenty minutes." But since it might become relevant depending on the team composition: "If we want to use my powers in advance for fear prevention, I can manage a small group. But for removing it after it's happened, I need to be careful."

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Pause. "Yes, that would probably be useful. How long do you need for that, and how long would the fear suppression last?" Here's the canopied tent. "Are there any side effects or caveats?"

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She is aware that she's breaking a psychic esper taboo, by being actually specific in her powers. Mental powers are scary, in a way that just threatening someone's life often isn't. Far off threats of violence usually don't feel real to ordinary people in safe environments. That's not the sort of thing that happens to them. But tearing someone's whole emotional world asunder? Their sense of self? Being able to do something to anyone, and no one can ever tell? Yeah, that is truly scary. The kind of thing that causes ordinary people to stop wanting to have the superpowered person around, actually, and think instead, 'You know what, let's go without.' There's not really anything protecting her, if all the world decides to turn on her and tear her to pieces for just what she could do, not what she has done. Why did she say anything, she should have just stuck to the nice and safe and easy version of what she can do? There is no NDA protecting her, this is likely to go straight into the database for everyone to know.

If no one were brave, no one would save anyone from Nightmare at all. Her backlash means she absolutely cannot be deployed into it, but. ... She can do this. She's thought about it.

"Not long to do, but it would begin to fade at the half hour mark. The time it takes to fade at that point depends on the person and how much they - or their circumstances - try to throw it off." Yes, White Star has done testing, yes, it was properly with pre-written consent, and this is actually where most of her large psychic esper money has gone. "Side effects include dissociation, unendorsed high risk taking, and sometimes discomfort with one's actions after the fact." And then, before the inevitable question gets asked: "I could in theory keep the effect up indefinitely if present, but my backlash is mental and makes me more vulnerable to Nightmare itself."

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If they got more information than they were expecting, they're not showing it. They gesture at some chairs near one of the tables and say, "I'll pass that along. Would you prefer to have someone interface with other people for you or would just sending espers and victims your way be enough?" They're stretched thin but useful espers are even rarer than that and they're perfectly willing to have someone dedicated to enabling her.

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She sits where directed.

"... Interface to start with, please?" she requests, feeling like she's being such a burden on everyone around her but she's already anxious, and it'll just get worse, and and and she's helping them so it's okay to ask for them to help. If she gets good at it, then they can leave her to her own devices and she can stop wasting everyone's time and she will be a better esper who is using minimal resources in a crisis, which is positive and also something to aspire towards, but not actually required. Because she's helping a lot already. "I have an updated copy of my power listing, I'll send it through."

Hana then opens the comm screen to get to doing that. She prepared this in advance, she can officially update the system (and everyone who reads it, oh no oh no oh no) on her powers. Bloop. Here it goes.

(AAAAAAA.)

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"Understood. I'll have someone with you shortly. In the meantime, please make yourself comfortable; there's coffee and tea and water and other refreshments on that table over there and some food on that other table—they're labelled for containing meat or milk or eggs or gluten and none of them have nuts—and there's general-use OTC meds on that other table over there like paracetamol and ibuprofen and if you need anything more than that you can send a request through comms or ask anyone. Do you need anything right now?"

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Nod nod.

"No, thank you."

(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.)

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"Very well."

And off they go to whatever their next task is.

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Okay. Then she's just going to sit here and. Maybe grab a snack. To nibble at. Nervously. So she knows what to do with her hands.

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"Excuse me, Fugimura Hana-san?" asks a man in Japanese.

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OH NO A PATIENT ALREADY SHE'S NOT PREPARED wait, no, you dumbass, that's Kang Jaeha, you idiot, you imbecile, you're making a fool of yourself in front of the, the, best psychic esper in the world, probably, not that any of them would ever consent to test themselves against each other considering, no stop freaking out SAY SOMETHING YOU FOOL.

"Yes," she agrees, after only a minimal pause, standing and bowing to him. "Kang Jaeha-sama. It is an honor to meet you."

Oh dear that was the wrong honorific, that was way, way, way too much, he's going to think she's an idiot otaku who watches too much anime or works too much in the service industry or or or or ACK HELP THERE IS NO UNDO BUTTON. STUPID STUPID STUPID.

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"—haven't been called that before," he says, a bit taken aback. "You're making me embarrassed, there's no need for all that. And the honour is all mine; I'm a big fan of your work."

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WHAT he's HEARD of her ACK it's probably ALL TERRIBLE she has only ever done - actually no she's pretty proud of her work even when she's being anxious but HE'S HEARD OF HER????? noooooooo she wishes to sink into the ground and be invisible and do nothing at all ever that would ever be perceived by anyone that could plausibly be painted as a hero of hers she's going to mess it up she's going to get it wrong, she's already gotten things wrong and they've shared like TWO SENTENCES.

"I - thank you. Um. I didn't know you spoke Japanese, I apologize. I was caught off guard."

WHY DID NO ONE TELL HER HE SPOKE JAPANESE. ... Admittedly she didn't, like, ask. Why didn't she ask if he could speak Japanese!!!!!!!

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"I picked it up here and there over the years," he says with a bashful smile. "Sorry to just show up like this, I just overheard you talking to Yan Koch-san and got curious to see if it really was you. This is your first time with Nightmare, right?"

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"Directly and while it is active, yes. But I have some experience with some of its rescued victims."

Oh good direct questions, she's good at answering those, those she can just answer and maybe not make too much of a fool of herself over.

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"I can't imagine those cases are easy. I've heard of so many people I rescued who..." He shakes his head. "It's... tough."

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"Yes," she agrees, and then she debates whether or not she should say that she thinks her assistance would help them a lot or if that would be too egotistical, but she does have some experience with other dungeons that aren't Nightmare but do go for the whole 'creation of fear' thing - no, too late, moment's gone, she'll just yet that 'Yes' hang awkwardly because she is so bad at this augh. Why! Is! She! Like! This!!!!

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"Anyway, I'm really happy you're here now and I hope you'll be—no, I'm certain you'll be of help to these people."

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Nod.

"I - yes. I hope so." Pause. She can't say she's exactly happy to be here - she is suppressing some thoughts about but what if Nightmare senses her backlash and decides she would be extra delicious and snatches her even while she's awake, can it even do that - but: "I'm glad to be here, too."

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"I was also curious about—forgive me for eavesdropping, I did, ah, actually hear the tail end of that conversation—you can help the espers going in, too?"

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"Yes. It's - um, it doesn't compare to your abilities," because Kang Jaeha is SO COOL and also the number one expert in dealing with Nightmare, "and I cannot perfectly guarantee length of time or prevent it from - grabbing hold of traumatic memories to work from - but." Nod. "Yes. I can make people not feel fear."

Herself included, actually, but in her experience squashing her own emotions is counterproductive to the extreme, and not even fully achievable. Her own anxiety and fear (and whatever else she wants) can be muffled, but her body's physical reactions still happen, and the high blood pressure and racing heart and shaking hands and everything else - well. That is still very real. She still causes damage and backlash to herself, and the debt will always come due at some point. Best to be very deliberate about what she incurs, and to have strict rules about not doing it trivially.

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"That would be tremendously useful, especially if it keeps Nightmare from getting to them. Emotionally, that is. I can keep it from actually reaching people, supernaturally, but—the entire situation surrounding going in and rescuing people, that's harsh."

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Nod nod.

"Then it's likely our powers will be leveraged in tandem." AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA she's going to make such a fool of herself and she started things off bad anyway and maybe Nightmare would find her backlash delicious enough to try to snatch her in particular even though she's an esper no those are bad thoughts, do not think those thoughts. "I look forward to working with you, Kang-shi."

Should she have gone with that honorific??? Was that too starchy?? It at least wasn't something as horrifically cringe as senpai, she thinks she would rather throw herself to Nightmare directly than literally ever say that out loud, especially after slipping and calling him sama, ack how could she have done that she is the worst.

(This is a much better anxiety spiral to be having. Carry on.)

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He's not going to say anything about "Kang-shi". It's still definitely better than "Kang Jaeha-sama".

"Likewise, Fugimura-san."

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"Ms. Fugimura Hana? —ah, and Mr. Kang Jaeha."

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"Good morning, Ms. Xavier," he replies in English, extending a hand to shake hers.

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"Ah - good morning," says Hana, in extremely accented English, who instead bows because she's very Japanese and is doing her best. "Yes?"

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"I'm here to help you interface with others. I'll do my best to make sure you're comfortable! Would you be alright with starting now?"

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Nod! "Yes." Please give her something useful to do, she feels useless and pathetic and like she's wasting everyone's time - what if she suddenly can't use her powers, that would be the worst - that is vanishingly unlikely to happen.

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"I'll leave you to it, wouldn't want to cut in line. If you'll excuse me?"

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Hana nods to him, then: yes, please, the job part of her job.

"Is the patient a victim, a rescue esper, or am I dealing with an outgoing team...?"

She has switched back to Japanese, because it's easier for her, and. She doesn't know all of the right things to say, in English. The translation software should make up the difference? Right? Please???

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Yeah it works fine. 

"It's a victim. He lost his son to a suicide years ago, and Nightmare..."

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She doesn't wince. She just nods.

"Estimation for how long he's been inside?"

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"At least two hours, but he didn't keep track, and he's not talking very much."

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"Okay. Then I'm ready to begin."

She asks the man firm, solid questions. Would he like to have his experience of Nightmare lessened, what is his ideal state of recollection of his experience inside the dungeon, does he consent to her using her esper powers on him in regards to minimizing his trauma. It's all said in an efficient little packet that she has actually recited many times. Well, not the Nightmare part itself, but the consent part. She will not be poking around in his brain without his permission or his knowledge, she is going to be very clear about what she is doing and where, and he is free to refuse if he'd like.

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...he doesn't want to forget his son. And he doesn't want to—not feel sad that his son is dead—

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She will not be touching any memory or feeling of his son, of that he has her solemn word. What she wants to reduce is the pain Nightmare has inflicted upon him.

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But...

...

...okay. He doesn't know what that means but. Okay.

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She will, with his permission, demonstrate it in a small portion of the time he spent in Nightmare - the later part, just before he was rescued - and then he can decide if he would like it for the entire experience.

With said permission granted, she stretches out and reaches for his mind. Her psychic powers are perhaps better termed as empathy, and she searches through his memory for the latest of the time spent in Nightmare, and it's not hard to find. The sickening horror of seeing his worst moment again and again and again, inescapable and suffocating and all encompassing, there like a bad taste or a bad smell and just as easily found. She carefully picks out the small portion of that awful cocktail that was this man's ten minutes before help arrived. Then, as if between her proverbial fingers, she grasps the part of it that hurts and she smothers it.

The memories do not go away, exactly, but there is no flare of emotional pain to go with them. No fear, no horror, no guilt. It is a thing that he saw, that happened to him, and all of the ways what was shown to him was like his son are - detached. It could be anyone's child, hanging from those branches, and though it's awful to see anyone like that, it's clearly.... not him. The emotional weight of witnessing the event, of knowing that is his son, is just gone.

"Would you like me to do that for all of your time in the dungeon?" she asks softly.

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"Yes. Please," he begs. His eyes were already puffy from hours of crying and he's crying again but from relief, this time, from the sudden lifting of the weight and the realisation of all the extra weight that's still there.

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She nods, and then reaches out and takes it away.

It's just a place. He loves his son, and he's sad that he's gone, and it still hurts, how he died, but - that has nothing to do with that dungeon, does it? It was just a place. Not a nice place, of course, but - it has all of the emotional weight of going to the DMV, with more macabre and spooky aesthetics. But it could be Halloween decorations, for all that it matters.

"I do not recommend this as a replacement for therapy, though I do recommend avoiding thinking about, or recounting to others, the specifics of your time in the dungeon for the next month or two," she says, after she's done. This is probably what he was going to do anyway, but, well, it's kind of important to say. "You are still fully capable of forming opinions of what happened if you look too closely, especially now, when it's comparatively fresh. It's better to give yourself time to forget the details you might find, on reflection, painful." Quasar got her a little set of business cards; she can pass him one. "I am available for follow up appointments if you feel it is necessary, but - I wish you well, sir, and I hope you never have to see me again."

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    He doesn't thank her profusely because he's just emptied out most of the emotions he felt over the past several hours but he thanks her a bit anyway and tries to not... feel. Too much.

"One of the rescue espers that came with him said she was interested in your services, if you offer those to them, too," says Ms. Xavier.

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“I do,” says Hana, nodding. “In relation to the current crisis with Nightmare, I am available to any who need my help.” As backlash allows. “As backlash allows,” she adds, because this is not a blank check.

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So she'll go fetch the esper that's interested in Hana's services.

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She's a mousy girl with short spiky black hair and brown eyes, not at all anime-coloured, who looks—pretty antsy. "Hey."

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"Hello."

And then it's down the disclaimer list! Would she like to have her experience of Nightmare lessened, what is her ideal state of recollection of her experience inside the dungeon, does she consent to Hana using her esper powers -

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"Hang on, hang on, that's—a lot—"

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"It is, yes," says Hana, who obligingly stops.

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"What does it feel like?"

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She pauses as she tries to explain it. Hm. This isn't in her usual disclaimers...

"What I try to aim for depends on what the patient - you - want, but usually it's a more distant memory, one that you don't think is particularly important? It doesn't hurt to think about, and doesn't come to the forefront of your mind very much, like... thinking about your breakfast probably wouldn't. You can remember the details just fine, but given long enough, it'll fade like any other unimportant memory. But if you'd like to keep more complicated emotions from the time, then it's harder to pick out the pieces you want to keep."

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"And it's just—from today? Not the other times I went in? Or..."

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"I would start with a fraction of today, so you could compare it to what else you remember. Then if you liked my work, finish up the rest of today. If you wanted me to also work on other times you've gone into Nightmare," she has a card! Here is the card! "then that gets complicated and would take a lot of time and attention to get right, and require a lot of your assistance. I usually recommend that in conjunction with a licensed therapist who you can talk through your personal goals with, because, um, I'm not certified in that sphere yet."

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"And it's—the thing is—" She stops talking. Then she continues: "I don't know if there's a therapist that can handle the shit we go through."

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"I think..." She fidgets. "... Multiple people working together can handle heavier burdens than someone alone? And it's easier to deal with terrible things when they're at one level of remove or more." She has no idea if that makes any sense at all, she does not have her psychology degree and certification yet!!!!!!!! What if she is breaking this poor woman's mind with her clumsy hands!!!! "So I think sharing it with someone you trust will - help keep it from crushing you under the weight alone."

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"It's not just about sharing, it's—" She cuts herself off again. "Sorry. I don't, we don't really have time to get into it. I just want—show me? What you said you were going to."

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"Okay."

She takes her hand, then reaches out for the last ten minutes of this woman's experience in Nightmare, and carefully picks out the bad experiences from, everything else, and then: squish.

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...okay. She can probably deal with that. She was shielded, it wasn't Nightmare itself, but—wading through other people's nightmares is also nightmarish. Knowing what other people have gone through, watching it happen and having to rescue them, watching Nightmare continue to taunt them, and it taunts them so much, and it shows them where other victims could be, and every step she takes she might be abandoning someone to a horrible fate, and—

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Hana nods.

Then does Filipa want that for all of her experience in Nightmare today?

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Yeah. Yeah, she does.

And... she also heard that Fugimura Hana can also do a courage serum for future runs? She's going in again later, and...

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Then Filipa can have all bad feelings of Nightmare (today) squished.

"It won't exactly be a courage serum, more like a... dissociation or resistance to unwanted feelings for a span of time? And I'll need to apply it right before you head in."

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"Yeah. I'll have a break now," because fuck going back into that hell right now, "but if you're still around later, then... I think I will."

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Nod.

"Thank you for your service. I'm here to help however I can."

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"Thank you, too, Ms. Fugimura." And off she goes to hang out with her partner and not think about Nightmare at all, like Hana told her.

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Two more teams rotate out of the dungeon, each bringing one more victim out: a woman who was in a car accident that left her hospitalised for six months, and a man who was kicked out by his parents as a teenager for being gay and had to do survival sex work until he managed to find his feet and who... honestly has a lot more than just the one nightmare. That man actually leaves the dungeon nonverbal and doesn't even nod or shake his head in response to prompts, he just stares vacantly at whoever talks to him.

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... okay. So, the second man is a hard one. She has never actually had to deal with someone that's this nonverbal and unresponsive before.

"Sir," she says, carefully and clearly, after nibbling on her lip and approximately drowning in anxiety, hoping the translation software isn't going to butcher this, "if you would like the pain to stop, take my hand."

She holds it out to him.

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He blinks at her words again.

He doesn't look at her hand.

He has a soft not-quite-smile on his face, emptily dissociating, and he accepts her hand.

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That is (probably?????) enough consent to work from to, well. Gently smother his current emotional state with something like, but not quite exactly like, a copied state-of-what-he-had-been-before, with a bit more weight towards calm and safe and everything is okay. She doesn't aim for happy, obviously; she could, but that'll be so jarring the patient will probably have some kind of emotional whiplash.

Still, it's very obvious and very strange, to suddenly have one's emotional state just - flipped like that. Like a switch that's in his brain.

"If you let go of my hand it will stop," she says, just as clearly as before. Please, translation software, don't butcher this. (aaaaaaa this isn't enough consent for her comfort aaaaa she's being a bad scary psychic esper she was so stupid for not thinking of this in advance -)

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The smile on his face starts to slowly hollow out over a few seconds and then he pulls his hand away all at once and starts looking around like he's only just now noticing where he is.

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He probably is.

Okay, intermediary, help. Check to see if he knows where he is now. She requests this with her words to the person that is supposed to be doing the talking. Hana is going to close her eyes and try not to... freak the fuck out... about maybe doing a nonconsensual forced emotional change, which is going to be a lot to ask of herself, actually.

(She is not qualified! She is not qualified!!!! No one should have this kind of power over anyone's brain!!!!! She probably fucked this guy up for life, or ruined her esper reputation for her life, or or or or or -)

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"—sir, do you know where you are? Do you remember what happened?"

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"I, I," he looks around and stops when he sees the dungeon portal through the slight opening on the tent. "I was in a dungeon? But—"

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"You were taken by a dungeon that preys on people's memories—"

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Yeah he's not listening again, he's—remembering—

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"Would you like some time alone?"

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"My husband. Is, is he—did the dungeon—"

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"He's waiting outside. Would you—"

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He stands up abruptly and immediately strides out of the tent.

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She messed everything up she messed everything up she messed everything up it is all terrible she is the worst she is slime she is worth less than the dirt on the ground she's wasting everyone's time she's hurting people she's wrong and bad and awful and the world would be better with her gone because she's such a fucking idiot and she hates herself and -

- Hana is sitting there quietly, eyes closed.

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Xavier sits on the chair in front of her. "Ms. Fugimura, how can I help you?"

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She needs to stop existing she needs to stop she needs to never do anything else ever again she needs everyone to leave her alone so she can be allowed to cry she needs her old partner back she needs -

"I - need procedures. Um - in cases of someone who is catatonic or unable to consent. I think I should not touch another case like this until - somebody else, not me, please - figures out procedures for me to follow to avoid doing something bad."

(TOO LATE she already has because she's the WORST -)

There are a number of procedures for 'active mental influence and when it's okay to remove it'; the quick gloss is that it's (mostly) fine to remove weird hostile mind shit that dungeons do, but Hana's abilities to influence emotions that are both in the past and not directly caused by dungeon interference means that there's... not really anything specific for 'what to do if someone is catatonic.' Because it's not, technically, an ongoing mental attack. It's a weird complicated grey area that she's been trying to navigate by the procedures that this most closely compares to, and with maximum communication and full expressed consent, but. She didn't have that here and had to make a choice (AND it was the WORST ONE EVER) and that - should - not - happen.

(It'll happen regardless, because that's what her job involves, a thousand little judgement calls on minds that aren't her own, all the time, every day, and she'll get each and every single one of them WRONG, why is she doing this again - if they want her to stop they will tell her. Except in this case. Because she didn't have procedures. And, clearly, guessed ALL WRONG she hates it it's the worst she's the worst -)

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She nods. "Do you need a break, food, water? How's your backlash doing?"

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"Um." Can't trust her brain it's almost always screaming incorrect data, wait she has a procedure for this.

She holds up her left hand and looks at it. Is it shaking?

It is not.

"Backlash is manageable," she says, even though everything is horrible and she's the worst and she wishes for the nearby awful dungeon to swallow her up so she's allowed to turn her own emotions off it would be so easy who cares if it's counterproductive it sucks right now. "Water sounds good."

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She can bring Hana some water, then, as well as, "Mr. Jung—the man from earlier—went home with his husband. His husband thanked you on his behalf."

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Nodnod.

(It means nothing she didn't manage to touch any of the parts that were really traumatizing - she just brain blasted a guy to feel better of course he feels better he didn't consent and also his husband doesn't even know what she did and -)

"Is there anyone else waiting on me?" she asks, because that's important information to know before anything else.

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"There are no more victims at the moment, but there are espers on a team that's about to go in who have expressed interest in your services."

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Nod. "Okay. I can handle that, I - have a procedure." Having a procedure worked out in advance is very very soothing. She doesn't have to trust her (broken, messy, confused, spiraling) brain as it is now, she can just - lean on what has been worked out before. Do that, let the patient tell you what they want, do what they tell you. If things go wrong it's not her fault. (Like she will ever believe that, she won't, it's her powers it's her fault always always always.)

Deep breath. "Ready."

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There's a three person team that's about to go in. They're wondering if it's "fear" specifically that she works on or if she can help with things like anxiety and dread and disgust and the like. People's nightmares can get really fucked up.

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"It can just be fear, but I can also catch anxiety and dread and disgust as well. What was tested at White Star," and it's fine to just talk about it, now, White Star is pretty officially going under and it's fine to explain stuff, "ended up as something similar to a benign dissociation, catching only negative emotions. It's - not quite dreamlike, but it does have downsides in that fear responses are often necessary for appropriate risk analysis. But there's a chart," because Hana has been overthinking this so so much, "that you can use to specify what level of blocking for each negative emotion on a scale of zero to five." There is also a write in option, because of course there is. Anyway, commscreen: uh, can she send these people the little charts to fill out? That should be straightforward in the system, yeah? Can she fuck this up, probably not, it's fine, right? Right.

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Oh. Charts. That's... really useful actually! They are going to fill out these charts!

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Nod.

See! Procedures are so great. She can just let people tell her what they want without having to talk to them. And if it goes terribly it's exactly what they signed up for, which is terrible but somewhat better than her deciding from on high how to Fix people! And then inevitably getting it wrong! (Because she is terrible.)

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Yeah alright they have charts filled out now, what's next?

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Now with their permission (and stated consent) she will follow each person's chart for emotion squishing, and they can run through a quick review of things they would find upsetting/disgusting/terrifying etc to see if this level of muted reaction is acceptable to work under.

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There are a couple of tweaks they ask when they actually experience the effect live but overall they are pretty happy about the result.

Half an hour duration, yes?

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Hana is of course happy to tweak and notes the changes on the charts for use for these specific espers later. Because that is the procedure.

Roughly thirty minutes before it starts to fade, yes. After the thirty minute mark, it will begin to fade based on how much they observe their own mindstate - if they observe that it's weird and strange for them to not feel those emotions, and try to simulate them, it'll get thrown off faster. Similarly, if they try not to throw it off directly, it'll last longer.

And of course, once they're out, she will be happy to remove it for them. But it'll fade completely even without her personal involvement.

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Dissociating and ignoring your emotions is a vital skill all espers working with Nightmare need to have so they've got it.

And into the portal they go.

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Okay. Cool. She hopes it helps them a lot and that she gets to see them again.

Her backlash hasn't improved, exactly (quite the opposite!) but following a set of procedures and having people actively consenting and seemingly happy with her work is nonetheless very soothing to the mind esper. Now she can just fret about normal things like: oh no she should have told her intermediary about the charts sooner!!! It didn't occur to her!! She is terrible and foolish and bad and wasted precious time with her flailing and -

This is still pretty manageable, for her, honestly. Though, yes, now the charts can actually be... directly distributed to people... instead of hidden in the commscreen behind like six tabs on her abilities that people can technically find if they read through everything but still not, like, directly in front of them.

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Ms. Xavier has another team that'll be going in soon (there are more and more espers arriving as everyone gets the notifications and get their teams ready), if Hana could work with them?

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Yes, of course. She is glad to be of service.


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Neither of them is notified personally that Nightmare became active; Hye-jin's powers aren't useful in a dungeon with no monsters whose core no one's ever found, and while Tae-gun would in theory be a great rescue esper it is Quasar policy not to send in espers who have had traumatic experiences Nightmare could make use of.

(Plus, you know, that one other reason.)

So they have their soup of regular A-ranks, today, and then they can go back to Tae-gun's place.

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Hye-jin's pretty used to celebratory sex immediately after clearing dungeons, but after their, uh, impromptu orgy last night, Tae-gun might be a bit sexed out. (She's not, but neither is she particularly needy. Could go either way, depending on his mood.)

She will be snuggling up with him regardless, though. If he wants to turn it to immediate sex, he will definitely let her know. It's not like he's subtle.

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He isn't, which does make this strange, doesn't it.

"I'm not jumping your bones," he observes with a curious hum. "I wonder why not? It's not like it's ever been a problem. And, I mean, you're still hot, and if you're down to fuck then so am I. I mean, I'm pretty much always down to fuck, I think? You, that is. Not most other people. But right now I'm not jumping your bones. I wonder why."

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Giggle.

"I am up for fucking if you'd like to," she says affectionately, caressing his cheek, "but we did just have an, uh, orgy last night, so. That might be why."

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"Huh? No, that's silly. If anything that'd make me want it more. Maybe I could invite my hyungs? We could do that more often. Although I think Juheon-hyung will be a much rarer thing, they did say they're still mostly exclusive most of the time. Juheon-hyung and Hyun-jae-noona, I mean. Si-yeon-hyung would totally do it, though. I bet I could call him. Unless he's in a dungeon. Or doing something else. Anyway point is having an orgy last night makes me hornier not less horny, because now I know everything I'm missing. Hey, were you compatible with noona? Having sex with two people I'm compatible with, like, really compatible with, at the same time, that was wild. We should see if we can do that more. I'm not compatible with noona, at all, but I am with Si-yeon-hyung, and you. I'm a lot more compatible with you than with hyung. But having sex with both of you at the same time would be fantastic. You're compatible with Chun-hee, right? So if both of them came here and the four of us had sex, that'd be even better, for all of us. I bet they'd like that."

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"I'm compatible with Chun-hee-sunbae, but not Hyun-jae-sunbae, correct," she confirms, amused. "It does seem like it'd be great. Both being guided from two people at once and the proposed foursome idea."

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"Though uh - maybe not literally right now or anything, I. Do still feel like I personally owe you a proper apology before we go involving other people for a foursome."

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"Huh? Apology? Because we didn't have sex? That's fine. I had sex with my hyungs. It was great. And it looked like you were having fun, too? There's no need to apologise."

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"Pffff, no. That's fine, I'm glad you had fun."

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"What I'm sorry for is... I kind of outed your situation with Jaeha without.... thinking it through... or respecting your right to decide how you'd like to present yourself, or - shit, I'm messing this up. Hold on, let me start over." Deep breath. "I'm sorry. I took away your ability to decide if and how you wanted to talk about something very personal and sensitive, without talking it through with you at all or your permission or - anything. I acted without really thinking it through, and hurt you in the process, and, um. I'll try not to do that again." Wince.

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Oh.

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"Oh yeah there was that."

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Okay now he's getting pissed off again.

"You realise it's not just about me, right? That if Kang Jaeha finds out more people are onto him that could be a fucking shitstorm? It's not just about what I feel or it being personal though it's also that but you have endangered them. You have made it harder to—if Si-yeon-hyung puts something in his head then—ugh. I'm mad at you but you just apologised and that makes me feel like such a dick but also I'm still mad? I don't know what to do about that. I, fuck, I don't know, I think I forgive you, I probably forgive you, in the sense that I, like, I'm not going to keep banging on this note but like. It's not just my feelings."

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Wince. "... Yeah. I - did also endanger them. I'm also sorry for endangering your friends thoughtlessly."

She's pretty sure his friends would prefer to know and be in danger than have no fucking idea, but, well. ... She still should have considered it. And she didn't.

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"I don't know, how do other people do this? You apologised yesterday and apologised today again and I'm still feeling mad and I don't know why except it's probably backlash, right, obviously it's backlash, I'm only talking so much because it's backlash, only I don't know if there's something else that I'm thinking that I'm mad about which I don't know how to say. The thing you said, though, outing me? Good, that was good, that's a good way to describe it, you did out me. Even if I was being pathetic. Even if maybe I should've considered it. I probably should've considered it. So, you know, it wasn't all bad? Thank you for shaking me out of my dumb skull, sometimes I need that.

"I don't know. How do you not do that again?"

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"Um. Well it was - somewhat extenuating circumstances, right, I don't think I'm going to be in a situation where I watch you - try to reconnect with your estranged but beloved friends over a very large inferential gap that is missing what they would find key information to - sorry, now I'm babbling, um. The general flavor of not - rushing ahead to make a decision that affects you and everyone you care about without your permission, is, um. ... Well the guilt will get me, for one, I feel like I betrayed your trust and I hate that, but for another I am just genuinely not the, the know-it-all I act like? I don't know everything, I won't get everything right, and I shouldn't just. Think I'm the queen of the universe and everyone's feelings and know best for everything without even checking with the man who's supposed to be my partner." Sigh. Lean. "I don't know if that's an actionable enough avoidance strategy, though. Um. ... I will accept ideas for me not doing that again."

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Pet pet pet.

"...we can try to figure out once I'm less stupid. I—appreciate you saying that. Thank you. ...the thing about accepting ideas, I don't think you should keep beating yourself up due to guilt, that's my thing and if you steal it I'm not gonna be special anymore."

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Snort.

"You don't have a monopoly on guilt, Tae-gun. You're not allowed to. That's deeply silly."

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"I have a monopoly on being stupid about guilt. At least to this extent. Like... like... you know. How I've been doing it for years, right. It's a mental illness is what it is. Of some kind. Anyway I think I'm not mad anymore. Am I not mad anymore? I think I'm not mad anymore. I'm also a lot more okay with this in front of you, which, well, duh, there's no point hiding anything anymore, is there? So it's fine. ...it's fine, right? I can probably get horny again if you'd rather do that but it's harder when I'm already going like this. Like, full speed ahead. I'm kind of hungry."

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"I'm fine with being around you when you're like this, but I'd be happy to try to steer to something else if you found this too intrusive or something. Hungry seems more directly relevant, though, c'mon, let's get food." She takes and kisses his hand, then it's time to lead him kitchen-wards for food! "And um. Thank you. For forgiving me. Though for the record you can take it back later once you're not backlashed and yell at me some more."

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Kitchen-wards!

"I mean, when I'm like this I'm, like, I have no filter, and I say more words than are necessary, my SNR is low, but I don't say things I don't mean. They're just, they're a lot. You know. I'm an overthinker, right? So, when I'm like this, I'm an over...talker...sayer... I don't know. It just all spills out." He taps his temple. "But it's all here! Usually! It's all here. Just bottled up. Okay, sometimes it's not, sometimes it's kind of impulsive and I don't really mean it later, but only when it's, like, the very first thing I come up with, you know? And it's usually obvious because I say it and then I'm like shit I shouldn't have said it. I don't think there's anything here I shouldn't have said? Yet, anyway. I'm sure there will be. At some point. I guess it depends on the subject."

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"I won't hold any of this against you. You've heard me babble before, and I don't even do it for backlash reasons. Honestly, yours is very cute and charming and it's a pleasure and a privilege to witness. Opinions on food options? I lean something easy."

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"Dunno. Whatever. Also don't call me cute, it's triggering, he called me cute."

Pause. "Wait, that's fucking stupid, why am I letting myself have a trigger about being called cute? That'd be like—well admittedly I did have triggers about literally holding hands with people. Man he fucked me up so bad. This sucks. Call me cute again."

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Wince. "You're cute," she repeats, even though she's wincing a little as she says it. "Though it's fine if you need time to get over things that seem ridiculous, I'm happy to dance around your feelings here? ... Which ramen flavor do you want? If ramen is fine. Is ramen fine?"

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"Yes, that's fine, chicken please.

"But no, actually, I'm so fucking tired of being given space. Of needing space. It's embarrassing and it only gives, like, I dunno, weight to all of this shit. Makes me think about it more. I'm trying to get over him! Like I should've five years ago! I'm not going to get over him if I keep allowing his, his, his everything ruin my fucking life."

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She can start preparing the instant ramen, then. His first. "Fair! And I, you know, did go and call you cute even as I was wincing on the inside about maybe hurting you. But, you know, I'm not the queen of the universe, you're an adult, you can set your own boundaries and I will do my best to respect them instead of," wince, "not doing that." Like yesterday. Ack.

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"You know another way he fucked me up that's really stupid? The way I keep trying to pretend I don't like you because I'm scared of getting into a relationship again. As in, pretend I just like you fine as a friend. Isn't that stupid? I'm pretty sure anyone with eyes would notice it. ...it's okay if you don't like me back. Or, like, it's not, I'm going to cry about it when you're not looking, but I don't want to pressure you. Wait, is telling you that I'm going to cry pressuring? Fuck, I think it is. Can we forget I just said all of this?"

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....

"... I don't think I can categorically forget you said all of that," she says, mildly, setting the kettle to start boiling. "Um. ... your implications are like me in a romantic sense, right, because honestly, I'm scared to be in a relationship again? But I, um. ... Also like you. A lot. As more than a friend. I just - it's - I thought I was in love, before, and I turned out to be wrong, and I don't trust myself or my feelings at all anymore, and it's all. Very scary. But I like what we have? Whatever it is right now?"

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"Oh it's scary, it's terrifying, like, but it would be lying if I said you don't have admin access to my heart right now? ...I don't know if that sounded romantic or stupid or nerdy. One of those. But anyway, you do. And what we have right now, I mean, you're practically living with me, we have a ton of amazing sex, we hang out all the time, we enjoy spending time together even when we're not just guiding or working, it feels like I'd be lying if I said I hadn't put two and two together, you know? ...gah I'm still pressuring you. Also I'm scared! I know I don't sound it but I am too! Except I'm scared of a different thing. And it's been five years. Oh that'd make sense if you were scared of that too in addition to your thing, having my crazy ex after you."

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"The crazy ex is not great, but - yeah it's... hm. Has it been six months since I broke up with my ex? .... Yeah, just over six months. Since my bitter breakup. So I'm actually more scared of getting into another... that... than the crazy mind control ex. Not to say that I'm not scared of him or anything, because I am, just." She looks away. "... It's hard. In a lot of ways I don't trust myself anymore. Or - go too far into trusting myself because trusting other people didn't work out great for me. It's this complicated balance that I can't really properly explain and I haven't untangled yet. Um. ... I don't feel pressured, exactly, it mostly feels like you're just trying to be honest with me, and yourself, which I ultimately really support. Is it okay if we're honest about it but then... don't... change anything? I like whatever it is we have now."

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"Oh yeah that's perfect actually I was just scared you might want to change it because like we are kind of dating except for the label. ...well, I guess I'm not being super sappy at you, I could be. But I won't. Because you don't want to change stuff. Also it's embarrassing. But it's the sort of thing I used to do. Is be sappy. And yeah, I like what we have. What we have is good. You're the only person other than Woo-young I've been like this with, by the way, since Jaeha. ...I don't like Woo-young. I mean, romantically. He's my best friend. I don't really know why not? It sounds like maybe the sort of thing I should. But I don't. I just like you."

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"Well, um. Thank you. I like you too. I think. With the caveats of - not trusting myself and also having recently broken your trust and hating myself for that a bit and - yes. Um. ... can you just hold me while we wait for the kettle to boil, I feel like it's taking forever and I want to hide from the scary feelings in your arms even though that makes no sense whatsoever, feelings are so fucking weird."

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"...I just told you I like you, of course I can hold you. But also," on his way there he uses a knife to grab a pillow from the living room and, after he's properly hugging her, he says, "I will now scream into this pillow to discharge all of the embarrassment I've been suppressing over the past five minutes."

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A

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SPORFLE!!!!!!

"... Tae-gun that was still very loud...." she giggles, helplessly. "I'm right next to you!!!"

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"Sorry."

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A

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"Better, thank you," she giggles, leaning on him so much that she'd fall over if he wasn't there. "While we're talking anxiety, is not using the oppa honorific okay? I can if you really want me to, but I have literally only used it with my actual relatives, and it's mapping to fucking onii-san to me, which is just, I, no."

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"...yeah. Uh. I suppose that'd be weird. Um.

"...um.

"........would you be okay calling me Tae-gun-ah? And. Can I. Call you. Hye-jin-ah, too?"

That's technically changing things and it's changing things in a dating direction but. But!!!

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"Hmm. Yeah, okay. Sounds good, Tae-gun-ah." She leans back and then up to give him an affectionate kiss. "And you may!"

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Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh.

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Heehee. So cute.

In time with her partner overheating, the kettle's ready! Time to prepare (read: "prepare") their instant ramen. And then it's back to hugging him after sealing the little tops to let it sit for a bit.

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He starts running his hand through Hye-jin's hair.

"My relationship with Jaeha was good. It was very, very good. And I still don't understand what happened. Don't understand why he did everything he did. It feels like it could've been fine, like he could've talked to me, like we could've figured it out. He didn't need to do everything he did, to keep me. I was already his. There wasn't any meaningful risk of me leaving, it feels like he was seeing knives in shadows. And I knew him before he had been guided enough to be himself, and I knew him right after dungeons when under acute backlash. You can't... take so much from a person and have them still be the same. If the person out there isn't guided, if the man using his name is as backlashed as he was when we met, or more, that's not even a shell of him, that's him without any of the good parts of him. That's all of the bad, concentrated, without anything to make him better. What would I look like if I were bad without good? I'm scared and anxious and self-loathing and guilty and I don't trust anyone and I don't think I have any value besides the work I do and my image is really important to me and if I didn't have any of the good parts of me I'd be—I don't know what I'd be. But it's not me. I might rape people, I might go on destructive rages, I might be unreliable to keep commitments, I don't know."

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... Oh, so they're going back to incredibly heavy stuff, then. Uh. Okay.

She'll just hold him, then.

"... I'm sorry," she murmurs, uselessly. "That's really awful."

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"And the way I feel when you guys talk about—dealing with him. Is that you're—punishing my Jaeha for something someone else is doing. And I know it's not that simple, but that's what it feels like. And I dunno what my Jaeha would do, now if we could get him back somehow. Unless, unless I'm really wrong about who he was, then—I don't know. But if I'm not, he, he wouldn't—

"But that's the hiccup, isn't it, is that he did. Is that my Jaeha did do what he did. And I have no, no, I don't know. It never ends. It never ends, because there wasn't an ending, the last time I saw him was just before he left for a dungeon and I ran away, and I must've hurt him so much, but I couldn't stay like that. I couldn't stay."

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"... Yeah," she agrees, softly. "I'm - sorry for not seeing the nuance, there. Just going 'he's a terrible person,' when it's more complicated than that. Though I do still feel like the - person under the backlash that is depersoning him - made some really critical mistakes."

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"Yeah. Or—something. I dunno. I dunno what he was thinking. I'll probably never know. My Jaeha did... do things that were awful and I don't want to, to excuse that. It's just..."

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"Yeah. Really sucks that there was a magically enforced slope of evil to trip and slide down from a smaller set of mistakes." Pause. "... Sorry, was that too flippant? I mean it, just, um. It came out more flippant than I intended, and it's about a man's life and all..."

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"It's fine," he sighs. It's not like it's false, that's pretty much what happened. ...oh he's not saying everything he thinks anymore, his backlash is probably going down.

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They have been snuggling, and she is still petting him.

"Ramen's ready, I think, if we'd like to move away from the kitchen."

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"Yeah. Sounds good."

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Then they can move to a couch, and have a nice quiet meal with lots of snuggling. They don't need to talk, she can just scroll on her phone between the more important tasks of eating and petting him.

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... Then she reads something and makes a face.

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"...what happened?" He will not look at her phone because he is a good boyfriend partner who respects his partner's privacy.

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"Nightmare's active."

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He opens his commscreen to look at the announcement then shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath.

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"Yeah." Sigh. Snuggle.

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He rests his cheek on the top of her head. "...on the bright side this means that a lot of other S-ranks will start appearing." Pause. "I mean, that's not good, just, we'll be distracted, uh."

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Snort.

"Yeah. And we both do like to keep busy." And Nightmare being active means that Kang Jaeha is, you know, mostly accounted for? He is in a place that is not near either of them. Racking up even more backlash that is taking away all of the parts of him that made him good. Yaaaaaay. "Maybe we'll get to kill another one. Not that I'll be trying to do something stupid to get the chance, just."

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"...well if we have a lot of sex..."

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"Is that a proposition, or a future plan of 'Hey guys, do you mind if we go into the S-rank dungeon and fuck'?" she teases, amused.

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"Once I am done having feelings for the day I am going to fuck you into tomorrow but I meant the latter."

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"Ha! ... Well. I'm not against it," is she blushing? She is! Damn it! "... though I do still want to keep my regen under wraps for now."

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Tae-gun, for a change, isn't blushing at all. It's probably because he's still under a different kind of backlash. "Yeah. It ought to be secret. But it was very effective and efficient. Also hot. It was very, very hot. ...not in that it was Volcanic Range but in retrospect that, too."

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Giggle.

"Thank you. It was very hot. And I would get to do that backlash sex trick again! I can't do that under normal circumstances, it's only for when I can do massive scale fiery destruction! Terrible!!!"

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"I don't know, it was pretty awesome to me."

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He's still been scrolling through his notifications and he stops at another one and freezes in place. "Oh. Fuck."

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"It's mostly that I can't do it more because I'm responsible - hm? What is it?"

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"Yoon Ha-eun," he says, licking his lips. "I—don't know if you ever talked to her. She... used to talk on the group chat a lot. And—she was in a dungeon and—"

Goddamnit he hates confluences.

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"Ah," says Hye-jin, drooping a bit. "I... don't think I really did talk to her, no. I'm. Sorry I missed my chance, then."

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He waves the screen away and turns to fully face Hye-jin and hugs her closely. "Let's destroy them all. Every single dungeon. Let's make ourselves obsolete."

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"Bright and shining future of boiling water ahead of me, you got it," she agrees, nestling against him to hide from the awful in the world.

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He pulls away a bit so that he can look at her face, and he's not crying because he also didn't know Yoon Ha-eun, but there were people who did. And he says, "I'm tired of feeling things for today," and kisses her.

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Yeah, sounds good to her. No more feelings, fuck those things. Kiss.


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A bit after midnight, when Tae-gun and Hye-jin are both already in bed, Tae-gun gets a message notification.

Then another.

Then another.

Then another.

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...wha? It's not the emergency tone but it's a lot of notifications. He summons his commscreen in the lowest brightness setting and opens the notifs.

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The messages are in the group chat with Ha Si-yeon and Lee Juheon.

🪁freefall: hey
🪁freefall: @LeeTae-gun
🪁freefall: hey Tae-gun
🪁freefall: hey

And more messages are arriving as he watches.

🪁freefall: hey
🪁freefall: Tae-gun
🪁freefall: @LeeTae-gun
🪁freefall: hey
🪁freefall: hey Tae-gun
🪁freefall: hey
🪁freefall: @LeeTae-gun
🪁freefall: hey
🪁freefall: hey

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LeeTae-gun: What?

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🪁freefall: r u awake

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The movement of her partner next to her, along with the incessant sound of notifications, causes Hye-jin to stir.

"Mmmnnnrrgh ss'itdunjen?"

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"No, it's Ha Si-yeon being a clown."

LeeTae-gun: Now I am.

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🪁freefall: oh
🪁freefall:
did i wake u up

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".... Mmmnnh???" she grumbles, not... understanding... why anyone would do this.

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LeeTae-gun: Yes.
LeeTae-gun: Is there anything you need, hyung?

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🪁freefall: i'm bored an ddrunks
🪁freefall:
come hang out with me

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...he is not actually serious, is he?

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🪁freefall: hyung's here too

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🍀LeeJuheon: Sorry, Tae-gun, I didn't realise he was doing this =ㅅ=

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Hye-jin considers whether this is worthy of fiery wrath or not. … eh. That would involve getting up.

"Tell him he's an ass," she mutters, in Japanese, and then she turns over and goes back to sleep.

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"Will do," he replies in Japanese with a small smile.

LeeTae-gun: Hye-jin says you're an ass.
LeeTae-gun: I agree with her assessment.
LeeTae-gun: Go to sleep.

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🪁freefall: noooooo
🪁freefall:
i'm sadddddd
🪁freefall:
i need friendsssss

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...okay being called a friend does kind of. Soften him. A little.

LeeTae-gun: Why are you sad?

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🪁freefall: cause i missed youuuu
🪁freefall:
i forgot how cool you were

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...Tae-gun thinks he's just saying words, now.

But. Um.

He can't actually say that this doesn't make him feel loved. Being drunk dialled in the middle of the night by someone who really wants to hang out with him is—annoying, and it'll get old fast, but right now it's. Not. Yet.

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"Hye-jin, I'm going to go meet up with my friends, okay?" he says in Japanese, softly enough that if she actually fell back asleep she should hopefully not be woken up.

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She hums a sleepy affirmative, and appears to have enough presence of mind to immediately start stealing all available blankets to make herself into a cocoon of coziness.

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LeeTae-gun: Where should I meet you guys?

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🪁freefall: aww you mean we can't see your house?

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Juheon sends an address attachment.

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Tae-gun gets up, puts clothes on, grabs himself a canned coffee, and teleports there.

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The relevant address is a bar in Seoul, but they're standing outside it waiting for Tae-gun to show up.

"Yoooo Tae-gun!" says a very drunk Si-yeon, glomping onto him with one arm around his neck and sufficiently out of balance that Tae-gun has to catch him. "When'd you arrive?"

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"...literally just now."

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"Didja teleport or somethin'?"

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"..........yes."

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"Isn't that 'spensive?"

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"The guild covers teleporting out of my silo to anywhere in Seoul or dungeons to keep its location a secret."

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"Secret? Ooooooh 'cause of you-know-what with you-know-who?" He taps his temple. "Sense, sense."

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"Why is he so drunk?" he asks Juheon, who's been standing there with a faintly amused look on his face.

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And now the smile's gone. "Did you see the notification earlier today...?"

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"...ah."

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"She liked to drink! A loooooot. So! In her memory!" He brings the bottle of soju he'd been apparently holding in his other hand to his lips—

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—then notices it's empty (by turning it over and examining the couple of droplets that fall from it), and humpfs.

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"Were you friends?"

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"Drinking buddies!" He lets go of Tae-gun and turns away, looking up at the sky. "She had stories about her dungeons, and half of 'em were lies, but I didn't know which half. They were such good stories, too!"

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(He sniffles, once, and rubs his eyes with the back of his hand.)

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Then he turns back around, still grinning. "So we should share stories, too!"

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...Si-yeon's lost multiple people to this confluence.

Tae-gun walks up to him and pulls him into a hug.

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He freezes, at first...

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...but then he hugs back and starts shaking. "Damnit."

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So much for being done with feelings today.

Well, they can share stories, then. Happy ones. Cool ones, badass ones. Good ones, maybe not all of which are true.


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It would be wrong to say that Woo-young spent the day anxious about Hana and Nightmare, because he spent a lot of the day working dungeons, but there was a larger amount of that than he'd like. And he doesn't think that Kang Jaeha has any reason to mess with Hana, but... the thought still makes him bristle.

He supposes he'll ask how it went, once she comes back to the silo, and he'll only worry about her a little bit in the meantime.

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Will he be more or less worried if she comes back to the silo literally shaking like a leaf? Because that is how she arrives.

She would like to please nestle silently against him and hide from the whole wide world.

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...more! Definitely more!

Unfortunately he has very little control of his arms right now—not none, the more acute symptoms have diluted a bit and he's regained some of the motion he'd lost to the dungeons—so he can't properly hold her. He can still do his best. "Hey, it's okay, it's alright," he says in a soft voice. "I'm here."

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This earns a little pitiful whine and her sort of - curling around him like some kind of cat.

She's very backlashed.

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Yeah...

...hmm...

Her backlash is anxiety, but he doesn't know her well enough yet to have a good understanding of what her anxieties tend to be about. She hasn't opened up all that much to him, and he knows it'll be a process, but he can at least try to ask. "Do you want to talk about your day?"

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".... Mm-mm," she hums in a negative.

 

"Did a terrible job and probably everyone hates me," she eventually elaborates.

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"...I doubt that very, very much. I especially doubt it because Quasar got requests to place me on handholding duty for you because of how much they wanted to keep you around." He can't actually accept those requests, he's an invaluable rescue esper, but he got them anyway. "And you're an incredibly talented, smart, and driven esper with an amazing work ethic. Nightmare is the worst dungeon there is and I'm really proud of you for facing it."

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........ Sniffle.

She hums an affirmative, and then apparently it's crying on him time.

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Woo-young can move his arms enough to wrap them around her stiffly, if he tries, and he can let her cry on him. 

(He doesn't think he's ready for much more than this, yet, but... there's a part of him that sees the appeal in comfort sex.)

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Excellent. Hana is grateful for this service. She is a very tall woman who is making herself so very small and even if she feels stupid for crying on him, it's more efficient for handling backlash, so it's probably okay.

 

.... After a while she requests the resumption of the dorama they'd left off, last time.

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They can though he might need her to be the one to do it, she has more finger mobility than he does to use remote controllers.

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Oh. Yes. She will need to be directed to do it, but she does in fact have mobility and can make this happen. She now Has A Task and Can Complete That Task! (She apologizes for not realizing she needed to be the one to do things sooner.)

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She really doesn't need to apologise. When she's less backlashed he's going to suggest her a new Procedure™ (not saying the word sorry), but for now they can watch dumb romances.

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This is soothing, and she does soon stop crying, settling down for watching extremely dumb romances and snuggling.

She's still very quiet, but she's stopped shaking, too.

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Yeah. It... probably wasn't Kang Jaeha, it almost certainly wasn't him, actually, so Woo-young can relax a bit.

Just snuggling while watching doramas isn't enough to make him able to walk, he'd need to snuggle all night long for that, but it's enough that he regains most upper body mobility, and after a while of that at the end of an episode he says, "Do you want to eat anything?"

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“… yeah,” she agrees, after a long pause of consideration. It’s not that she’s hungry, it’s that she should eat something.

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He pauses the TV's autoplay and gently unwraps himself from her to get into his chair. "Preferences?" he asks, guessing the answer as he makes his way to the kitchen.

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“Whatever you want is fine.”

But she can help with preparing it! She has this power!! And maybe she won’t even mess it up!! (That’s a lie, she probably will.)

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"What's your spice tolerance like?"

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"Uh." She doesn't know the correct answer to this question. "Fine?"

It sounds more like a question than an answer.

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"I'll assume that means you've never tried anything with a real kick, then," he says with a wry grin. "We can have an omelette with kimchi, how's that sound?"

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"Fine," she repeats, agreeably.

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He didn't really expect any different.

Well, the silo is set up such that he can do everything from the wheelchair but it definitely helps to have her fetch stuff for him and he's pretty sure she'll be happy to be useful and to be given clear instructions on how to achieve that. Cooking is approximately the best possible activity on that front.

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Yeah! She is so able to follow instructions, and seems to find this reassuring. It's hard to tell that she finds it reassuring, mind, but Woo-young has a lot of practice reading expressions entirely through minimal movement of eyebrows.

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He super does! ...admittedly hyung's eyebrows are a lot more expressive than Hana's, but, you know, he's used to the language now even if the accent is new. Also a big part of reading it is knowing the person speaking it and that particular part of Hana's personality was very obvious very early.

"Had the bad luck to get a non-Euclidean A-rank today," he starts conversationally.

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"Oh," she says, clearly not entirely sure how to respond to that. "I'm sorry."

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"It's fine. They're a headache but they're interesting. I need to keep the map up all the time and it's twisty like a puzzle game, but my power does a lot better than a lot of other teleporters' at this." Really his power is one of the best teleportation powers out there, it's just his backlash that fucks him over.

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"... The maps seem like they'd be confusing," she observes, after a pause. "Do they... twist into themselves? Can you only look at part of the map at a single time?"

Apparently Hana is capable of being nerdsniped. Or at least map sniped.

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Bingo. 

"It really depends on the dungeon exactly! Like—have you ever played first person puzzle games like Portal or Antichamber?"

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Nod! "Portal."

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"So the technical name for dungeons that are mostly Euclidean except places connect to each other weirdly like they do in Portal is 'projective punctured space' but we call it 3.5D dungeon because it's, like, almost a regular 3D dungeon. Maps for those usually have two visualisations: a first-person 3D one, and a bird's eye view 2D one projected onto 3D." This is gonna be hard to explain without a visualisation so he summons a map of the most recent 3.5D dungeon he went to to explain. "None of today's were 3.5D, to be clear," he explains, "it's just a good starting point to get to the more complicated ones."

It turns out when Woo-young says that he "hates" non-Euclidean dungeons it's actually a love-hate relationship that he's very opinionated about. There are so many kinds of messed up geometries—spherical, hyperbolic, directional, embedded high-dimensional—and his power isn't great for all of them but it's pretty good for many, and although he doesn't have the maths background to understand the numbers underlying it all he's got a very good spatial intuition and understanding of them, which he uses the visual aids to supplement.

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Hana listens attentively! This is actually really interesting stuff, and it's a wonderful distraction from her backlash. Being given tasks to accomplish is similar - it's mostly the decisionmaking that seems to cause her the most stress.

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Well dealing with their backlases is the whole reason they're here, now!

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...

"Do you... have someone else to help with your backlash?"

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Blink blink.

"No?"

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"So we should probably spend the night together." There's no way to deal with the rest of her backlash otherwise, if she doesn't have someone to fuck like he does hyung.

(It'd be easier if he could fuck anyone but hyung right now.)

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"Oh. Yes, that would be fine."

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"What are your assignment plans? Nightmare every day to the limit of backlash?"

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Nod. "Yes. I'd like to arrive at an appointed time each day, so I can be scheduled around."

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"If you're using Quasar as your intermediary they should have a suggested time for you on the scheduling app."

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Nod! "Yes. I was going with that one."

Oh no, has she stated the obvious?? She's stated the obvious. She sounds so stupid.

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"Is it the same time every day? What's the plan for tomorrow? My first dungeon isn't until the afternoon." He kind of wants to spend some time with her without backlash and build more of a rapport when she's not actively trying to hold back half the thoughts her brain is generating, and also he wants to know more about how Nightmare has been treating her to be a more supportive partner which he can't do if she doesn't talk about it.

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"Same time every day. Nine AM."

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"Oh." That's really early, damn. "...I might need to go yell at someone about my schedule, then, it's insane for our schedules to not be aligned."

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"Oh. Um. ... Mine's because of the location of Nightmare. It's in Germany. I don't think mine should be changed to be later, it's a little late for arrival as it is." The obvious time to be dealing with Nightmare is of course at night. This currently puts her arrival at 1 AM local time; frankly earlier would be better.

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"Yeah, that makes sense." But it sucks. How's he going to...

...he'll just lay his cards on the table. "So I kind of wanted to hang out with you sometime when you're not under any backlash."

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"Oh. ... I don't know how that's possible now that Nightmare's active." Oh no, was that too judgemental?? It was probably too judgemental, she sounds condescending for sure. Quick!! Reassure him that he's missing nothing!! "Um. I'm about the same, though? With less crying and shaking."

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"It's not really about that. It's... I know how mental backlashes can colour everything? And it'd be nice for us to develop a relationship outside it, too.

"If we shifted our schedules such that we woke up naturally a few hours before your shift that'd work, I think? Assuming a six hour run and us spending twelve to fourteen of the remaining eighteen hours of the day together, eight of which we're asleep for, I should be backlash neutral, at least."

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Nod. ... She doesn't mention maybe arriving earlier to Nightmare after some adjustment. This is fine. Six hours at Nightmare, actively using her powers, is a lot.

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"...I know that look. That's the 'okay I guess but I just thought of something that might be a problem but I don't want to bring it up and rain on your parade' look. Out with it."

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Oh no.

"... It might be better for me to start scheduling things earlier if possible, to, um. Set up the emotional blockers before the main bulk of the rescue espers go inside."

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"My schedule is the most flexible. I can match yours, and it's the most efficient backlash-wise to do that anyway." She's making things up to be worse than they are in her head, isn't she.

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She totally is. She's a burden on everyone around her; a teleporter based in Korea is not going to be best leveraged at 3 AM or whatever she'd end up at for maximum Nightmare efficiency, probably with how quickly her emotional suppression fades it's not even going to be that much more efficient to arrive earlier, and on and on and on.

".... Okay," she agrees, instead of arguing, though.

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"...if it helps, I'm being selfish, here, too? If I'm in a dungeon when you're out and vice versa I am also going to die of backlash, you know."

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"... Not literally?" she confirms, suddenly concerned.

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"Hopefully not! But work with me, here, I need you just as much as you need me, you're not doing me any favours by taking on more work or worry than you need to and not letting me be an active participant in our work relationship. Lean on me just as much as I'm leaning on you." He gestures at his chair.

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"Oh. Okay. Um." She pauses, then adds hesitantly: "... I'm trying?"

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"Cool! Me too. Also—I'm going to try to tone down my whole... this... But I expect I'll fail a lot so please forgive me in advance if I start acting like I'm looking for a fight. I don't mean it." ...much. It'll just be a habit he'll have to break, because the way to get through to Tae-gun-hyung in fact is to pick a fight.

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Nod. "It's okay. They're good ideas."

But yes please stop acting like you're picking a fight with her, she's perfectly cooperative.

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"Cool. And, um, sorry again." Food's done, though, so they can eat?

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They can!

"Apology accepted." There's a long silence as she tries to figure out how to... say things... but probably she should? Hm. "Um. ... You can just ask for things? Mostly I... don't know how. To ask for things. Especially when I'm backlashing."

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"That sounds like a problem we can workshop solutions to, when I'm less tired," he decides.

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"Thank you for bringing it up. And thank you for—I get that this was probably hard, so thank you for doing it anyway. We'll figure out how to be good for each other."

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Nodnodnod.

"Yeah."

For now: food and then, perhaps, snuggles?

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Snuggles! It's the whole reason they're here.


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Even in a confluence, named S-ranks are relatively rare, but unnamed ones, ones that do require both Tae-gun and Hye-jin and other espers besides, those are becoming common as the confluence's really starting to gather steam. Nightmare is often (though not always) the herald of that, the dungeon that appears before things rapidly escalate. From past data, it's likely that Tae-gun and Hye-jin will be called to S-ranks two out of every three days. The day immediately following the appearance of Nightmare is one such day, as is the next.

The third day doesn't have an S-rank, though, and is consequently a day of lighter work for both of them, in which they're going to be soloing a few dungeons on their own. They're still not all of them easy dungeons by any means: while Tae-gun and Hye-jin usually prefer to share A-ranks, they can solo most of those and with the way the confluence is going there are times when they need to do that. Or, well, "need"; there's too much work and not enough people to do it, and at least Tae-gun himself is the type to take those dungeons on when he feels it's necessary.

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Well, she does like to keep busy.

... She hasn't actually been worked this hard before, though. She doesn't have a problem with it, exactly, and it's also not like she can't handle it, just. It's clear that she wouldn't be able to handle it forever, and she is very extremely tired. Not even just physically, but - emotionally. There's the actual confluence, and the S-ranks (that could somehow become like her first one!!!! and they might really kill her this time!!!!!) and then there's the crazy stalker ex (who is only sometimes indisposed with Nightmare!) and then there's helping Tae-gun reconnect with his old friends and partners (and apparently some of them will bother him in the middle of the fucking night???) and she still doesn't have the secret underground base properly set up yet, and probably she should get to know more people in Quasar before someone else dies, or get out more and meet people that are not at risk, or... suffice to say, there's a lot. Most of it isn't even confluence based, just exacerbated by it.

At least solo dungeons (solo A-ranks, now!!!) are sufficiently distracting to take off some of the non-confluence pressure. She can just turn the part of her brain that's not immediately tactical off and focus on doing her job. And then she will head over to Tae-gun's silo and either be fucked out of her bad mood or just collapse to fall asleep on him, she's not sure which.

The confluence will be over eventually. She'll have more space to breathe and think about how to handle her litany of problems, then. She just has to get through it.

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Tae-gun notices the strain that's being put on her, but there's not really much that can be done. He's also under that same strain, but he couldn't possibly do anything else; people rely on him. He just has to get through it. 

One dungeon at a time.

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Yeah.

One dungeon at a time.