To give credit to the eldritch sigil theory, it turns out that the new people in his room have bat-like wings and horns...

...and tails with an arrow-shaped tip at the end. Which Morty might not notice because once he can see the tails he can see how very naked they are.

The only thing they have on their person is a book. The smaller one uses it to cover himself.

Morty covers his eyes. "Gross! Why are you in my room! And naked!"

The two naked demonic looking boys exchange words.

Then one says. "Comprehend Languages." then he points at the other boy. "Share Languages."

The words sound like every language Morty understands, overlapped, but comprehensible. "What just happened?"

Conveniently, Morty only speaks English.

"I don't know! I was stimming with some cardboard and then it blew up and then you guys were here! Are you guys- demons or something, or do you just have GSD and teleporting powers?"

"The translation is undecided on the word 'demon'. We don't have any form of teleportation. What's GSD?"

"Did you do this to us? Not cool, first free time we had in forever."

"GSD, it's what gives people - wings and horns and stuff, or turns them into slime monsters, or whatever. I think you guys are demons, this is above my paygrade."

He goes for the phone and punches in a code. "Miss Hartford, I think I have demons in my room. -oh. Okay, but two naked guys with horns and wings suddenly appeared and it's really weird. No! No, I had nothing to do with this, I swear to God. Can you just- oh. Okay."

He puts the phone down and looks at the possibly-demons, then looks away again. "Okay. Hartford's sending somebody."

"Great, who is that?" One of the possibly-demons says sitting on the bed and using a wing to barely cover himself.

The other possible-demon does the same and looks around. "Is this Prime?"

"Dunno what 'Prime' is. Ms. Hartford is the administrator of the school. -this is a school, by the way. She sent somebody to assess whether you're dangerous or not."

"Prime is the name for the human world. Are you human, right? Are we in trouble?"

"I'm human. I don't think you're in trouble, but you're here, and that's weird and kind of alarming. The school's priority is gonna be getting you back where you came from. Unless you don't want to go back, and you're not evil and dangerous, in which case you might be able to stay. It just occurred to me that maybe Hell isn't super great and people don't necessarily want to be living there."

Frown. "The translation is weirding out on the word 'Hell' too, our word for our world is 'Tartarus'. But we don't necessarily want to go back."

"Military life is really not for us. I like the access to hot guys, but everything else sucks." He winks. "I am Gavriel, by the way."

"If you're looking for hot guys, Whateley's the place for it. I mean, if you're a teenager. It is a high school. But like, a really weirdly sexy high school. Aaaand I'm Morty. And I'm straight, sorry."

"Aw, too bad. But your heterosexuality is forgiven. Herod, can we stay in the sexy high school? We are teenagers, right?"

"I don't remember the difference between Prime and Tartarus' years, but I think we are. And what do you mean with weirdly sexy?"

"Most mutants are Exemplars, which means they look older than they are and tend towards being conventionally attractive. They also act older than they are. This extends to having a bunch of sex all the time. The school does approximately nothing to discourage this."

There's a knock at the door. Morty opens it a crack. "Hello?"

The door swings open the rest of the way, revealing a young woman dressed in chainmail with a battle hammer at her belt. "Hello!" she says. "Oh, cool, naked people! What's up with that?"

"Hi! We just showed up here all the suddenly. And while this one didn't admit to anything, I think it was his fault, somehow? Anyway, hi! I am Gavriel and Herod forgot to introduce himself properly."

"Hi..." Herod says covering himself and blushing. "You are the one who was sent to talk to us?"

"Morty, did you fuck something up?"

"No! I was just playing around with some cardboard and it turned into some kind of eldritch sigil and then there were naked men in my room!"

"Huh. Well, mysterious nudes, my name is Ariel. I've been sent to provide you with clothing-" she takes two large, somewhat formless bathrobes from her backpack and tosses them to Gavriel and Herod- "and escort you to visit Louis for a threat assessment. If you do not wish to cooperate, I will pick you up one over each shoulder and take you there anyway. Questions? Comments? Concerns?"

The two will put the bathrobes on to the best of their ability given their extra limbs.

"We will go willingly. No need to take us by force."

"My only comment that if you were a boy I might have preferred to be taken by force, maybe next time we crash somewhere."

"Excellent! That makes it much easier. And my apologies for having tits, Gavriel."

She leads them out the door. There are some students leaning out their own doors to stare, but Ariel glares them back into their rooms. "Don't mind the peeping Toms, they're just wondering why I got called in."

Gavriel strust proudly down the hallway winking at the cute guys.

Herod feels sufficiently covered to just ignore the looks. "Is that a common thing? Needing to cart out people for threat assessment, that is."

"Not really, but when two possible demons abruptly pop into existence in the boys' dorm, we like to know if they're after our youth's souls."

"Huh, the translation spell keeps being weird about the word 'demon' and I think part of the issue is that some things match, but some are wrong... We can't take souls."

"Good to know! So what are you like, if you're not demons? It's a ways to Louis' tank."

"We have a word for ourselves," he says it, "and when I ask the translation for a translation it gives your word 'demon' as the best approximation, but not quite right. I am not sure how to explain our species, because... I don't think we are in the human world that we know of."

"Huh, I guess that's obvious. But explaining our species isn't that hard, just compare to what we remember about being human. We look like this, we can fly, we are fire resistant, we have this thing that makes us regenerate and look right. We have fetching horns and tails. Our species' magic is called empowering vices and it gives us a power in exchange of a drawback."

"Nice. No superstrength or anything, though?"

"Not without the right magic, no."

"We could be a bit stronger or even weaker, but not noticeable so. If you can carry us both then you are definitely stronger."

"Eh, I'm stronger than most people. Carrying you guys wouldn't even be pushing it unless you're made of degenerate neutronium."

Snort. "I have no idea what that is, but I am going to assume that we are not."

"So, what's the deal with this place, anyway? Is this all magic or something?"

"All of what? The buildings? Those are just made of bricks and glass and stuff."

"I was talking about how Morty called this place a 'weirdly sexy high school' and you have something that can turn people into slime monsters. But the buildings are kinda weird too."

"Oh. People turn into slime monsters sometimes when they manifest as mutants, I guess that's what he was talking about? That's not magic, that's just superpowers. Same with the weirdly sexy part. I don't know why the buildings would be weird to you, is your home dimension stuck in the Middle Ages or something?"

"I am not sure what a mutant is and I have no reference point to figure out what the Middle Ages are. Except as a period in history, I guess."

"Mutants are people with superpowers. Middle Ages: everything's made of wood and stone, there's no electricity or plumbing, everything generally kinda sucks."

"Hey! Our world does kinda suck," he says brightly. "It's war over this land or over that land. It's terrible."

"...Electricity is a thing, but I am not sure how it's relevant? Unless you meant something other than lightning bolts and electric magic."

"Pretty much everything here runs on electricity. It turns out if you put lightning in little wires and control it really well it can do things like light houses, cook food, record information, and play games."

"How it can do all that?"

"What sort of games?"

Ariel shrugs. "Take an electrical engineering class, I don't know shit about shit. The games are fun, it's like playing pretend with somebody except you can see what's happening right in front of you."

"Like an illusion?"

"Pretty much."

They arrive at a building with a sign reading HAWTHORNE HALL. Ariel leads them inside, and down the stairs to the basement.

A man sits in an armchair next to a large swimming pool containing an indescribably hideous monster. It's covered in scales, misaligned wings, and parts of less obvious purpose. It looks wrong, like something that should not be.

"Hey Louis," Ariel says nonchalantly.

"...Hi."

"Hello, Mr. Louis. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Hello," Louis says. (It's the man in the chair who speaks, but it's the monster's many horrible eyes that follow them.)

"Let's see. We need to figure out if you're dangerous, right?" He peers at the two of them for a long second.

Then he winces. "Well, you're traumatized ex-child-soldiers with magic that messes with Gavriel's impulse control and Herod's concept of proportionate response, but remarkably stable for all that. I'd say fortieth percentile for this school. Should be fine, especially considering your lack of offensive power."

"That's us alright," Gavriel said, he managed to go from uneasy to cheerful about Louis in a matter of seconds.

"Gav is way more likely to hurt himself than other people. And I have tons of practice fighting the impulse," Herod says reassuringly.

"See, we actually don't want him hurting himself either," Louis deadpans. "But unlike your home plane we have therapists, so you'll probably be alright. You have my blessing, go forth as you will."

 "Thank you." Herod bows and Gav does the same a moment later. "Er, what now?"

"Now we get you enrolled, I think. Unless you wanna get real clothes first, in which case we can stop by the Campus Store on our way over and pick up something."

"Clothes, please. I promise we will find a way to repay."

"No, no, Whateley provides dimensional refugees with an incredibly generous stipend, you're totally set. You could be the Imelda Marcos of menswear and you'd be A-OK. - well, I'll be buying in this specific case, since you wouldn't have the card yet, but I can apply for reimbursement because this is on a job, so it's all cool." She starts up the stairs, expecting her companions to follow.

"Farewell," Louis says solemnly. "And to the hope that we may meet again." A violin appears in his hand and he begins playing Auld Lang Syne.

"Bye, Louis. So, you're telling us that we will get free money? Sweet."

"Is it actual free money?"

"Yeah, totally free money. You get that we basically kidnapped you, right? Okay, sure, nobody was trying to, but we're treating it as the same situation. The money's a bribe to make you forget about the inconvenience and just remember how nice we were. And Whateley's got money to waste, we employ gourmet chefs to make cafeteria food."

"Fun! Herod we landed on those rich kingdoms from tales where they pave the streets with gold."

"Okay... given how my vice works, I will still try to focus on how much you're helping us. Easier to manage in case there is an emergency and I need power or something." Pause. "But thank you."

"You're welcome! It's not my money."

They arrive at the campus store. There's a surprisingly broad selection of clothing, including men's backless shirts. "Take, like, one or two outfits, I'm gonna take you to Cecilia Rogers' shop later to get really good clothes. Like, 'superhydrophobic and bulletproof' good."

Gavriel is delighted like someone who never had any chance to actually purchase clothes. He starts picking things for the both of them.

"...Why would we need bulletproof clothing?"

"It's not 'why would you need it', it's 'why wouldn't you want it?' I wear bulletproof clothes and I'm already bulletproof on three different levels. It's cool."

"Ah."

"Forgive my dearest brother. He sometimes forgets that things can just be fun."

"Hey, not judging. Just saying, don't fill up on bread before the main course."

Ariel guides them to the register, where she pays for the clothes. There's a convenient changing room nearby, where they can put on their new clothes.

"Gotcha."

Gavriel and Herod walk together in the same compartment and emerge a few minutes later. Gavriel basically got a simple color scheme for the both of them, dark with a few bright accents. They appear to be using the same size, which makes things tight fitting on Gavriel, but loose on Herod.

"So, how do we look?"

"You look great," she says, mostly looking at Herod. "Let's get you over to the office so you can get registered."

"Thank you." He grins. "So, I am not actually sure what attending school here entails. Like, what do you do when you are not escorting people?"

"Classes feature heavily. There's sports, both superpowered and otherwise. There's virtual reality machines that can put you in an interactive illusion where you fight other people in similar machines, those are really fun. For me, at least, I don't know how you feel about violence. There's also actual combat arenas, where you can fight people for fun or over rivalries, imagined or otherwise. There's a bunch of different clubs. That sort of thing."

"I wonder if the virtual reality thing wound help with our vices. Your world does have a lot of options to have fun."

"Speaking of that, is there non-combat violent fun options?"

"Gav."

"Are we talking like wrestling or like whips and chains? If the former yes, if the latter I should introduce you to Xan."

"Mostly chains. But he is into the other things, too."

"And yes, you should introduce me to Xan."

"Fair warning, he's shorter and skinnier than you but he can probably toss your ass across a room even without magic, so don't underestimate him. And he's got a boyfriend, but they're not exclusive or anything."

"Oh, he sounds dreamy. And me and Herod are not exclusive either, so it's all good." Wink.

"Could you wait until we have settled down before flirting with people on my behalf? We have nothing besides the clothes on our back and spellbook of useless spells."

"If you want useful spells, we've got a magic program that can help with that."

Herod stops on his tracks. "I would like that very much."

"How's your magic work? How do you make new spells? Can I see the book?"

"Huh, how it works depends on the specific kind of magic. For humans, our humans at least, they get spellwords, which are the spells I talked about. I have never created a new spell, but it's supposed to be a very intuitive process. Often using meditation and memorizing existing spells to figure out a way how to mesh them together. Ah, and when a person is born as a human they get their own spellword, which they can use as many times they want, but have to figure out how to unlock. But anyone with a spellword can memorize other people's spells, but it's a fire-and-forget kinda deal."

He offers her the book. The pages have very loopy writing and the occasional diagram. They are all completely opaque to her.

"It's useful, but kinda boring. Empowering vices are way more fun, you get a bit of a specific power and a 'vice' as a drawback, none of this writing and reading spells for hours to no end."

"Wow, that's nothing like our magic. We just have to gather Essence and then do a bunch of mental backflips to make it do what we want." Demonstratively, she conjures up a globe of red light and tosses it into the air, where it bursts into sparkles. 

"Ooh, pretty."

"That sounds way more versatile than ours. How long did it took you to learn to do that?"

"Took me about five minutes. Takes most people weeks, if not months. I'm a Wiz-class mutant, means my brain instinctually gets magic and it's easier for me to use, in addition to generating more Essence than a baseline human. One of the many ways in which I personally am unfairly lucky."

"Wow. and becoming a Wiz-class mutant is not something one can... acquire?"

"Nnnno. You're either born a mutant or you aren't."

"Maybe we will reincarnate as mutants in the next life. Can you even reincarnate in the same world?" That question appears to be aimed at them both.

"I have no idea, actually. I am not even sure this world is part of the cycle."

"Yeah, we don't have reincarnation as far as anyone can tell. If we do, it's certainly not the kind where you keep your memories and personality intact."

"We don't keep our memories, but we can get them back gradually, helps if you use magic. Our personality stays more or less the same, plus the change of circumstances, but the way the reincarnation works it sort aims at proper circumstances for you to keep being yourself."

"Case in point: Herod and I are soulmates. We are reborn together because our fates are intertwined." This is accompanied by an one-wing hug to Herod.

Herod distractedly hugs him back. "Huh, I am pretty sure that giving our magic to people from here means that they will get added to our reincarnation cycle."

"Aw, mazel tov on the soulmates thing. I'd take guaranteed reincarnation over whatever ambiguous afterlife situation we've got going in this world, I'll tell you that much for free."

They arrive at the office and go in. The demons are provided with paperwork to read and sign. It's mostly pretty straightforward stuff.

Gavriel grins at Ariel and walks-in.

It's bizarre but convenient. Herod inquires about magic lessons and if the two can room together. Otherwise, the situation is alien enough that they don't have strong preferences on anything else and should be ready to sign things up.

"Magic lessons are an option on the syllabus just like anything else," says the kindly old woman at the desk. "Rooming together shouldn't be a problem. Now, Louis did let us know the two of you are... together, so don't make us regret putting you in the same room. But it shouldn't be too much of a problem, and given we're putting you in Poe anyway, just... try to keep our regret at a minimum."

"I will try our best, promise." He bows his head.

She pats his hand. "Thank you, dear."

She then provides each of them with an ID card and another card, this one purportedly containing money, and a course catalogue ("Just pick out some courses you like, you'll talk to an advisor tomorrow") and a campus map with Poe Hall circled.

Ariel waits outside. "Where to, chiefs?"

"Poe Hall," he points at the map. "Do you have advice on what courses we should pick?"

"Also, what's up with Poe Hall? The nice lady implied it is great."

"It's where they stick the queer kids. Apart from me, but I'm a special circumstance. So Poe's gender-segregated like any other dorm, but since pretty much everybody's attracted to the same sex, it's kind of a mess."

She snatches the course schedule from Herod's hands. "They're probably gonna give you remedial world history because you're from another universe, so no need to take normal history classes where you'd be totally lost... Intro to Superpowers is a given... Lit might be fun, depending on how much you like books... Intro Magic, obviously... Math, how are you at math?"

"I like math, Gav doesn't. He pretends that he isn't as intelligent as he actually is, but I think we will both like Lit."

"As long it doesn't tire my beauty, sure. I want to take Art. Not sure about Intro Magic, you made it sounds kinda technical."

"Well, math's required, so I'll just put you down for different sections. Gav, if you don't want to take magic that's your prerogative; what kind of art do you want? We've got drawing and painting, sculpture, woodworking, metalworking, stained glass, yarncraft..."

"Oooh, primarily drawing and painting, but I want to try all of those, even yarncraft."

"I am going to veto you working with metal or glass. Unless, the school has really good anti-fire wards."

"We do. Do you, like, project fire, or something? Because that'd be really cool."

"Sadly not," Gav says at same time as Herod says-

"Thankfully not," then he continues, "the reckless part of his empowering vice makes him less likely to follow safety procedures, or remember not to put his hand on the fire. It's fine when it isn't something that spreads, if he cuts himself we can just tie him to a bed until everything grows back thanks to the empowering part of his vice."

"Huh. Yeah, they might not want you in their workshop if you're gonna disregard safety procedures, the official stance is 'regen is no excuse to be sloppy'. I'll put you down for drawing and painting. And there's space for another class, so guess what, it's time for mandatory martial arts training. Mandatory in this case means 'mandatory unless you're too traumatized by the whole child soldier thing to fight people', to be clear."

"Assuming this place is consistently nice and we don't have to kill anyone in the martial training. We should be okay."

"You guys are really fixating on the child soldier thing."

"It disturbs people. I was raised to kill people, too, but mine was less systematic and more 'my mom was a crazy supervillain'. And no, you won't have to kill anybody in martial arts training. It is in fact very much discouraged."

"I am so sorry. I think part of the issue is that - at least in the demonic world - people that reincarnate are not considered quite as immature as first-life children. Not that I am defending the practice. Tartarus is a horrible place."

"Well, you're well out of it," she says philosophically. "Now that you've got your classes sorted out, what's next... oh, I should show you to Poe and then you should get your shots. Do you guys fly faster than you walk?"

"Faster!" Herods says leaping into the air. Maybe this will cheer up the mood. "What are shots?"

Ariel rises into the air and starts towards Poe at a fair clip. "Shots keep you from getting sick. You have to get a bunch of them because we have different diseases than you and you're potentially vulnerable to them."

"Cool. Less vice spent on being not-sick."

"Is that magic?"

"Nope! Pure science. You'll probably learn about it in your acclimation class."

"So much to learn."

"That's the nice thing about science."

They reach Poe pretty quickly at their flight speed. It's a brick building, no-nonsense construction. Ariel leads them inside; it's pleasantly furnished, with a TV room to one side and a weight room to the other and stairs up to the dorms in between. 

It's not that different from the rest of the school, but impressive by their standards.

Gavriel gawks at the TV room. Then he peers inside the wieght room. Any interesting guys in there?

Someone of indeterminate gender, covered in what looks to be molten gold, is deadlifting a barbell capped with rune-covered plates. The room is otherwise empty. 

"That's Rani," Ariel whispers. "Do not fuck with Rani."

Herod pulls Gav away by the horns. "Understood, but why?"

"Bipolar and Diedrick's, plus they could literally crush you like a bug. They're a TK-6, meaning they can apply about 5 tons of force. Rani could lift a car in each hand. -a car weighs about as much as three cows, for reference, does your universe have cows?"

"Livestock animal that's source of meat, milk and leather? Yeah, at least it matches with an animal from Prime according to the translation. What Bipolar and Diedrick means?" Herod pulls Gavriel further away from the weight room, still by the horn.

"They're not that much of my type," Gavriel mutters, but he doesn't make an effort to escape the grasp.

"They're mental disorders. Bipolar makes them swing between emotions too quickly, and Diedrick's makes them just go crazy sometimes, paranoid and self-aggrandizing and spiteful and shit. I'm friends with them, but only because I can beat them in a fight. Not really safe for squishy mortals."

"I see, sadly, we do have experience avoiding the type."

"On the bright side, they're pretty much the only one like that in Poe. There's other folks with problems, but none as violent or as powerful. Poe's a good place."

Ariel leads them up the stairs to the second floor. "There's one room available," Ariel exposits. "All rooms have two beds, two desks, and a window with a charmingly pastoral view. Bathrooms are at the end of the hall, east for girls and west for boys. Showers are communal, which I'm sure Gav will appreciate. You're starting as freshmen - how old actually are you, by the way?"

"Twenty five."

"In Tartarus years," Herod quickly adds, "when we got to the papers we rounded down to eighteen of years."

"Huh, you're a couple of years older than me. Weird. Well, you're starting as freshmen, so the showers are going to be occupied by 14-year-olds - though they're not going to look like it, Exemplars are kind of creepy that way - so don't have too much fun."

Gav pouts. Herod nods and makes Gav nod by pushing his head by the horn.

"Exemplars are the ones that look different or something, right? I am afraid I didn't get all the classifications straight."

"Yeah, there's a bunch of classifications. Exemplars are strong and tough and smart and pretty. You want the whole list?"

"Go ahead."

"Avatars channel the power of a spirit. They typically have other powers besides that, based on what spirit they have. My powers are mostly based on me being an Avatar. Devisors make weird machines that don't function on the same laws of physics the rest of us use. Espers have various forms of extrasensory perception, like empathy or psychometry. Energizers absorb some form of energy from some source or other and can release it in some specific form, often either physical speed or energy blasts. Gadgeteers have an instinctual understanding of technology, and can create things far beyond the current cutting edge; technically they're a kind of Esper, because they're easily capable of understanding and improving on devices they've never seen before. Manifestors can create some form of temporary material, like a suit of metallic armor or a geyser of human blood. Mimics can mimic other powers, regenerators can, well, regenerate, shifters can change their shape. Telekinetics have telekinesis, which can be at range or to enhance their own strength, or both. Warpers affect the laws of reality directly in some way, such as by altering probability or teleporting. Mages, as I mentioned, have an easier time using magic, and psychics have telepathic abilities, often along with telekinesis."

She exhales. "That's a lot of information at once, sorry."

"It's okay. Better explanation than we got during our paperwork. We got Ex-1 and Wiz-0 from being demons with a different kind of magic."

"Makes sense."

Ariel floats off the ground to look around the dorm room. "I guess you don't have a lot to move in. Should I leave you guys here to decompress?"

"Decompress from what? Getting all nice shiny stuff?"

"We wouldn't mind if you stuck around, but I wouldn't want to impose on your time."

"Hey, if you're not stressed I'm not worried. I don't have any demands on my time, we're in the middle of a break right now and my roommate's busy with personal shit. Y'all are the most interesting thing that's happened today. So, do you want to go into town and get the rest of your wardrobe taken care of?"

"Going into town sounds great!"

"Great. We can't fly there, too superpowery, but there's a bus in five minutes. Let's get out of here."

Ariel flies them to the bus stop, where there is indeed an idling shuttlebus. It takes them to a small town called Dunwich, where Ariel takes them to a little boutique owned by a woman named Cecilia Rogers.

"Ariel!" she exclaims. "Hello! Who are your guests?"

"These are Gavriel and Herod," Ariel says. "They need clothes. I defer to your expertise."

Ms. Rogers turns her gaze to the boys. "Wings and tails," she says thoughtfully. "Not my greatest challenge, but at least worth my attention." She waves her hand absently, and a large bolt of cloth flies toward her and hangs in the air. "Are we looking for normal clothing, superhero costumes, supervillain costumes? What do we need here?"

"Normal." Herod says giving Gavriel a sharp look. "We come from a world without superheroes and supervillains. We mostly want practical stuff to fit in."

"Speak for yourself. I want to stand out and attract all the boys."

"I can accommodate both of those preferences," Rogers says. "Herod, you first. You still want to look good as well as normal, though, correct? I will not make you a sweatsuit."

"I don't know what a sweatsuit is, but yes, I would still want to look good. Uh, we are used to borrowing each other's clothes which are always loose on me so I am not used to wear anything tight fitting?" This appears to be all he can readily offer on the topic of fashion.

She nods and sets to work.

Cloth, scissors, and measuring devices fly around at the clothier's whim, crafting reams of impeccably tailored clothing at a staggering rate. All of the pants have a slit at the back for tail access, and the shirts are either backless or feature similar slits for wings.

"You're lucky you don't have feathers," Cecilia says idly. "Feathers make it so hard to take a shirt off that pretty much anything I make has to be backless. And I invite you to find a way to make a backless tuxedo look dignified."

Well, technically, he is going to reincarnate as an angel one day and deal with feathers. He keeps the thought to himself, mostly because he is distracted by all the magical tailoring happening around him.

"Will I need to wear a tuxedo at some point?"

"It's possible. Ariel?"

"Throw one in, why not? Money's no object here. Maybe you'll have to attend a wedding. Or maybe you'll convert and have an extremely belated Bar Mitzvah."

"What's a ceremony of 'son of commandment'? Anyway, sure throw in a tuxedo. Henry doesn't know how to enjoy luxury."

"Oh yeah, automatic translation. It's a ceremony that you undergo in my religion when you turn 13 years old, or when you convert. Typically you dress up really nice and your grandparents give you money. If you have grandparents, and if they're Jewish. My own Bat Mitzvah was, uh, poorly attended."

Cecilia finishes with Henry and has him put on some socks and stick his feet into a machine that makes shoes to fit. "Next, please. What do you want, dear?"

"As Herod said I am used to tighter fitting clothing. It's not exactly a personal preference, but I like how they show off my muscles. Give the guys a sense of what's underneath."

Herod's tail makes a swish thing. "As long it keeps him proper. We don't have a sense of what's proper in this universe." He plays around with his new shoes.

Ms. Rogers nods understandingly. "Well, we can't have impropriety."

(She rolls her eyes conspiratorially at Gav.)

Things start flying around again. "Do you have any unusual resistance to cold?" she asks.

Gav matches her grin. "Not, like, as a power or anything, but I am used to it."

"Alright. Ariel's completely immune to cold, is why I ask," she explains conversationally. "The things that girl has worn out of my shop in the middle of winter..."

"Hey, you made that virgin-killer sweater of your own free will," Ariel says cheerfully.

"And that's something I must live with every day of my life," Ms. Rogers replies with a genteel shudder. "Oh, speaking of which, Gav, we should get you a couple of pairs of chaps. In case you have to unexpectedly ride a horse, or... something, I don't know your life."

"Riding horses or something sounds exactly just the sort of thing that fits my life."

...Herod pretends he didn't he that, but hear also does not protest.

Cecilia quickly has a wardrobe for Gav that she assures Herod is entirely respectable in many human cultures.

Ariel shepherds the boys out of the shop. "So, where to next?”

Gavriel is very glad with his acceptable-in-many-human-cultures wardrobe.

"There is more?"

"I don't know... writing supplies? If you want to get added to the reincarnation cycle as soon as possible we would need to prepare grab something to bleed Gav over-"

"You just went from normal to obviously-a-child-soldier. I am sure."

"Writing supplies we can get at the school store, so let's go into the woods until we're outside town limits and fly back to campus. As for 'something to bleed Gav over' are we talking more like a cauldron, a sacrificial altar, or what?"

"Nothing that elaborate. A jar and anything sufficiently sharp is enough if we don't mind getting messy, but I prefer something for blood extraction. The ritual will involve me painting some blood over myself and then over you and a bit on myself and then I will talk some introspective things about my relationship with my own magic while pushing it to power the whole thing. You will feel a sudden, but brief disorientation and acquire an empowering vice and the ability to use spellwords. Ah, doing this ritual means you won't reincarnate on Prime nor Tartarus in a future life, but the other worlds in the cycle will be fine."

"Oh, I can get you a blood draw kit. Does it specifically have to be Gav's blood, or is he just convenient? Because my friend Xan can make unlimited amounts of human blood for free."

"Either mine's or Gav's blood. As I understand it, it needs to be the blood of someone that is already part of the reincarnation cycle. It's sort of using our own magic to awaken yours, you see. Though, if we do it to Xan we could use him as blood source in the future."

"Aw, am I not good enough as a source of blood?" Gav says with an exaggerated pout.

Ariel floats up and pats Gav on the head. "I'm not sure the blood Xan manifests is meaningfully 'his' in a way the magic would respect, it's O- and he's B+. Doesn't match any specific person as far as we can tell."

Since she's already floating and they're now far enough out of sight of the town, she starts flying off towards the school.

They take flight. "It doesn't sound it wound work in that case. Well, Gav, it appears that you will need to spend a lot of time defenselessly tied to a bed."

"Eeeee!"

"Thanks to modern technology, we can just suck the blood right out of your veins into a jar, then have my friend Sky heal you! No tying to a bed required, you can do that on your own time."

"But combining the two is so efficient."

"And you're big fun of efficiency."

"Far be it from me to stand in the way of efficiency."

Soon enough they arrive at the store and walk in. Ariel snorts when she sees a blood draw kit occupying pride of place on a display table near the entrance. "Is it even legal to sell these here?" she wonders. She picks it up anyway.

Writing implements and Mason jars are easily found, along with all the toiletries and bedding they didn't purchase on their first trip.

Herod thank her profusely and he gets familiarized with the blood drawing kit. And the toiletries.

The toiletries are likely familiar: soap, shampoo, toothpaste and toothbrushes, shaving cream and razors, et cetera. The blood draw kit may be less familiar, but it seems pretty intuitive; there's a needle, a tube, and a bag.

"I'll handle the actual drawing," Ariel says, leading them back to Poe. "Seeing as I actually know how to use the thing."

The two demons can definitely recognize the functions. By their standards having soap and shampoo as two different products feels very like this place.

"Okay. I wonder if I should try being a healer here or not." They follow her back to Poe.

"We've got a pre-nursing class at Whateley, you might as well try it out. Or do you have some kind of healing magic?"

"Technically, I can transfer wounds, if I transfer them to Gav - who generates - you will soon find yourself with much less wounds than you started with. Some minor healing spells too and herbalist knowledge, which probably doesn't translate well for this world. But I would guess that the mentality helps."

"I regenerate too, if you're ever in a pinch. Actually there's a lot of regenerators around here. That's really cool! Definitely not the kind of power you'd find around here."

They arrive at Poe; Ariel leads them up to a specific room and knocks on the door. It's opened by a very intimidating-looking individual, horned, covered in black scales, and with leathery wings extending from their back. The individual exhales a wisp of smoke. "What?" they ask, revealing a forked tongue between numerous very sharp teeth.

"Is Sky here?"

The tongue flickers out. "I think it's in the shower."

"Cool, thanks!"

The door closes.

"Charming individual. Sensible arrangement of horns and wings, but everything else was a bit much."

"That's GSD for you. Gulshan's cool. Affiliated with my mortal enemy, but cool."

Ariel moves her hands in an intricate pattern, sparks trailing behind them, and conjures up a glowing envelope which sticks itself to Gulshan's door. "There. When Sky gets out of the shower, that note will tell it to come to your room and help Gav recover from the blood draw. Want to get this started?"

"Now is good. Should we use our room? Or is there a place for this sort of thing?"

"We can use your room."

Ariel follows the boys back to their room and sets up for the procedure. First she casts a cleaning spell over the room, then another spell which numbs a small patch of Gav's arm, then another which causes the median cubital vein to glow beneath the surface of his skin.

"A better nurse probably wouldn't need magic to find the vein," she admits, inserting the needle, "but I'm kind of an amateur, so I'm helping myself out a little. And there we go, we'll leave it in for about a minute and then we'll have a good amount to work with."

"Neat tricks."

"You are doing a cleaner job than most healers that I know. Removing blood tends to be annoyingly messy."

Eventually they have enough.

"Okay, I don't need you to actually take off your shirt for the next part if you don't want to..."

She shrugs it off immediately.

Apparently it was the kind of shirt where you don't need to wear a bra under it! Modern clothing technology is amazing.

"My poor innocent eyes."

"Grow up, Gav!" Herod says, he is a medical professional... okay he is staring a bit, but not much.

Right, ritual. He removes his own shirt and takes some of the blood and uses it to finger paint designs on Ariel's skin. Mostly straight lines and circles. A spiral in her forehead, a spiral over her heart a spiral over her belly. Then he does the same with himself. But instead of spirals he makes a circle with a thumbprint in the middle.

"Okay, story time. Are you ready?"

"Roger roger."

"Alright... So, even back in our worlds, there is a misconception that what kinds of magic you get is straight-up about your personality - including where you reincarnate. That simplifies the reality of the situation. The magic that you get helps you being the person you are or become the person you're becoming. Sometimes this is very simple, violent powers for violent people, perception powers for the curious and so on. Sometimes, the magic needs to get creative."

He reaches out and grabs Gav's hand. Coincidentally, Ariel starts feeling a tingly of magic from the blood on her skin.

"In my past life I had a very... black and white view of what justice and retribution meant. Every action needed a consequence. Like being good meant to balance a scale. Then our country got into multiple wars and a first I kept justifying myself that they are just or unjust for this or other reason. After years of this that view started to erode, but it didn't went away completely when we died."

Gav kisses Herod's hand. The tingly of magic gets stronger.

"I am not glad that we died together. But we did and this mad it easier for us to be reborn together. Reincarnation is not instantaneous it can take years because the magic will try to find the right conditions for you to be reborn." He shrugs as to dismiss the thoughts. "Anyway, when I died I was in a trajectory to realize that exact retribution was a stupid concept, but I was not all the way there. So I got my empowering vice. The power to transfer wounds with a touch and the drawback where I obsesses over exact retribution. And I do mean exact, I spent long hours contemplating hurt myself to balance out the wounds I caused in self-defense. And of course, the circumstances are such that we end up in a war zone and recruit still as kids. From very early on, I was forced to use my power under threat and without agency... it was the perfect way to confront me with how terrible the horn for horn mentality is. It was not pleasant, and it was no the good way to achieve the conclusion, but I can appreciate that it got me there."

"I, for one, didn't need any growth so I got to stay as perfect as always and got the regeneration and reckless combo."

She can tell that he is trying to inject levity in the situation.

"Of course you're, So, where was I? Oh, I said magic me 'got me there'? That's a great analogy. Magic is not only about you now, but also the path of your life. What power you get is about where life is taking you."

The last words appear to echo in her head and she feels the power flare over her skin and the blood glows red for a moment and she feels something reaching deep inside her coming to the surface...

The room's temperature drops slightly.

"...am I supposed to... want things? I can feel... I can absorb heat, okay. But I want... My head's full of- I want to go find Vera and rip her head off. Really, really badly. More than usual."

"Alright, that feels fairly common." He does not let go of Gav's hand. "Take a step back from the power itself and try to feel it. It's specifically her? Can you tell why you want to rip her head off?"

"She tried to steal Sally from me. Tried to make her into her property. She took someone I loved and made him into a hostage, a living deadman switch, and everyone thinks it's true love. She ruins everything around her, takes good things and taints them. And she gets away with it. She always wins. And she'll keep winning, keep sucking the goodness out of the world, until I can destroy her."

It keeps getting colder as she speaks.

"Wow, who the fuck she thinks she is?"

Herod blinks at "true love" and again at "destroy her".

"Okay, if you do want to destroy her. I would recommend dialing back from the magic. It often makes people less effective at doing what they want."

Ariel grimaces, but slowly, the room warms up again.

She looks very uncomfortable. "Uh. Okay, so, the reason I don't kill Vera is that I would be arrested and quite possibly executed. Apparently, Angry Ariel doesn't really think that's a consideration."

"I can relate. It's possible to work around the drawback with practice, you can accumulate power for use for later."

"Is this Vera a noble or something?"

"Okay, good, I'll just beat the shit out of people in the sims to work it out. Gav, you're not allowed to kill people unless they're actively putting your life in danger in this country. Unfortunately."

"You said that she got away with doing a bunch of nasty stuff. It sounded like what you get from a particularly nasty noblewoman."

"They might be a democracy. At any rate, this Vera person sounds potentially scary."

"We're a democracy, yes. Vera's not special, she's just rich and good at getting away with shit. And, you know, capable of undetectably twisting people's minds until they fall into eternal love with her. That's kind of her thing."

"Ugh. Mind control is the worst. Is there no way to protect against her?"

"Oh, there's plenty of ways to protect yourself from psychics, but she has ways of getting to people when their guard is down. Just... never talk to her when you're alone. She probably wouldn't go after you, you don't really have anything she wants. But better safe than sorry."

Nod. "On the brighter side. You can use spellwords now. They don't sound as versatile as your magic and you need to memorize it again after each use. But it stays with you and actually casting is not mentally complicated."

"Neat! Can I see some?"

"Of course. You can borrow my spellbook to copy."

He offers her the spellbook... the difference between now and the first time she saw it is very noticeable. Before it was just filled with undecipherable scribbles in an alien alphabet.

But this isn't alien anymore, it's language. One she can understand. It's not meant to be spoken, not exactly, but it's meant to be understood. It explains the spells in great detail. Each symbol being an intricate part of the whole and connected to the entire thing.

"What you need to do is to read the spell until it clicks into place."

"Cool."

She flips through the pages, scanning each page for about a second, then gets out a marble notebook and starts scribbling.

He looks at it curiously. "Do you have improved memory or something?"

She taps the side of her head with her free hand, still scribbling. "Exemplar brain. I think fast, remember everything, and am generally cheating massively at everything."

"Okay, color me jealous."

"She is from this world and has a bunch of other powers, including magic, and now you're jealous. By the goddess, you're a nerd."

"Hey, if I had to pick one of my powers to keep it'd be Exemplar. The rest of them are strong, but Exemplar is where it's at for convenience."

"I am noticing the theme. Maybe someone from this world will have magic to make people into mutants? Oooh, we should try that. It would be fun."

"We probably can't aim well enough for that. We might be able to get mental shields against the likes of Vera? Maybe?"

"I advise against trying to turn people into mutants; our magic, at least treats that as an intractable problem and punishes attempts to solve it. Psychic shielding is a thing, yeah."

"What do you mean with punishing?"

"Like, 'the worst time somebody tried messing around with somebody's mutant status, they turned into a giant flaming snake monster and leveled Buenos Aires'. It's a bad idea."

"I see. No mutant tampering foolery."

"Yep."

Ariel sits back for a minute, then straightens suddenly. "I totally forgot to get you guys your shots, shit. I am the worst tour guide. C'mon, follow me, technically you were supposed to get these a couple of hours ago." She throws her shirt back on, opens the window and flies out.

They follow, leaving the window one at a time (it's kinda small for a place with so many fliers).

"We are probably not as in danger, but lead the way."

"That's good."

It's not far to the medical complex. Ariel leads them inside and to the door of Doctor Ophelia Tenent. She knocks and the door opens.

"Hey Caduceus. I've got some extradimensional visitors here, they need to be vaccinated and we need to test them for invasive microbes."

The doctor turns out to be a woman in her sixties with extremely long, greying honey-blonde hair. Her hair appears to be prehensile, holding a mug of coffee and lifting it to her lips absently. "Sure thing, sweetheart." Her hair extends to a nearby cabinet and removes a series of syringes while she sips some more coffee. "Come on in, boys, these needles aren't getting any sharper."

The two boys come in. Herod looking surprisingly suspicious at the needles. "Uh." He offer his arm.

Dr. Tenent's hair glows for a moment, and his left shoulder suddenly goes completely numb. The hair stabs him in the shoulder several times, once for each syringe, then glows again. His shoulder stops being numb, and there's a strange feeling of something flowing through his veins quicker than it otherwise would.

"Next?"

Sure, Gav will take his shots like a big boy and everything. Here is his arm.

Dr. Tenent repeats the same process. "Now just give me a moment..."

Several different locks of her hair glow simultaneously and weave through the air in an intricate pattern. Her eyes begin glowing, and she peers closely at the boys. "They're clean," she rules. "You can go."

"This is pretty cool," Herod admits before bowing slightly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, sweetheart," Dr. Tenent says amusedly. "Don't get many people thanking me for shots, I'll tell you that much."

Herod gives her a sympathetic knowing nod.

"We should probably get back to your dorm before Sky shows up and wonders where we are," Ariel realizes. "I forgot to leave a note. This was not a well-planned expedition."

"From my perspective this was probably the least planned day of my livesss." He stresses the s.

"But it was fun."

"Bye, Caduceus."

Dr. Tenent rolls her eyes, smiling. "Bye, Stormhammer."

Ariel takes them back to the dorm, where, indeed, someone is standing at Gav and Herod's door. The person looks like a sexless living statue carved from gold-veined marble, has grand feathery wings growing out of their back, and is currently wearing jean shorts and a baby tee.

"Hey Sky! Sorry for sending you here and then running away. This is Gav, I stole some of his blood, can you give it back?"

Sky rolls its eyes. "Hello, Ariel. Gav, do you consent to me healing you?"

"Hello, and yeah. Do you need contact or anything?" He offers his hand anyway.

"I don't strictly need it, but it helps." Sky takes Gav's hand, closes its eyes, and glows with golden light for a moment, then opens its eyes again and stops glowing. "There you go. Anything else? I noticed you've got some scars, do you want to keep those?"

"Nah, those are of sentimental value."

"But thank you for offering... does eliminating scars costs you some sort of power reserve?"

"Not really. Healing big stuff tires me out, but I can just absorb more sunlight. Why?"

"Ah, I do have some scars of no sentimental value. But they are not a priority problem."

"All of your scars, or do you have some you want to keep?"

"All of them." He offers his hand.

Sky takes it and flares gold. His scars melt away in seconds, replaced by unblemished skin. "There you go."

"Taking you so much. If there is a way that I can repay you...?"

Sky shrugs. "I dunno. What were you using blood for, anyway? Usually if Ariel wants blood she just goes to Xan."

"Ah, it was for a ritual to give her human and demonic magical powers."

"Doesn't she have enough powers?" Sky sighs.

"Hey!" Ariel objects. "It was primarily for the fact that it supposedly causes you to reincarnate when you die, for your information."

Sky raises its eyebrows. "Interesting. I won't be partaking, then."

Herod blinks. "Okay. I feel compelled to make a better sales pitch, but I don't want to push and I don't want actually have a pitch."

"Why don't you want to reincarnate?"

"I'm Christian. We go to Heaven when we die, along with anyone else who lives well and truly believes in their faith. So I've kind of already got my afterlife situation locked down."

"Nice. Too bad that you won't get the magical powers then, they are fun."

"I've got some pretty good powers already, I think I'm alright."

Herod nods. "Thanks again," says Herod inspecting the place in his hand where a scar vanished.

Sky smiles. "Once again, no problem." Then it walks off.

"How much credibility there is to the afterlife thing?" Herod once Sky is sufficiently away.

"Depends who you ask, really. There's evidence that the religion is based on real magical concepts and that Jesus Christ was a historical figure with powers we can't currently explain. But that doesn't mean everything he said was true. For example, he claimed that other gods were all fake, which is empirically false. So the afterlife thing could be bullshit too. But if it isn't, Sky's got good reason to avoid reincarnating; by all accounts, Heaven's pretty nice."

"Fair enough," Herod yawns. "Sorry, it was night in Tartarus."

"We should eat something and then crash."

"Oh, sure. I'll show you the Crystal Hall, it's great."

Ariel leads them to a large geodesic dome made of some unfamiliar crystal. The dome, once entered, reveals itself to have three levels, the upper level containing a fountain with waterfalls down to the ground floor. There are several different food lines, each delineated with a unique legend. "The carrot," Ariel explains, "is for vegan fare. The cheese is for vegetarians. The steak is for meat-eaters, not to be confused with the cow, which is for obligate carnivores. The geode is for people who eat rocks and minerals, the baguette with a line through it is gluten free, the banana is various fruits, and the cake is for desserts. You must try the desserts. Also, there's the specialty kiosk, which is for people with specific dietary needs, like blood, insects, or live prey. If you have such needs, you can inform the administration and they will be provided. I am going to go to the obligate carnivore line to get an entire rack of lamb, then to the dessert line to get some pie, and I'll be available on the first floor when you're ready. Okay?"

The two stare at it all for a long moment.

Then Herod notices that they have been addressed and nods.

They are still staring at it all. You can almost hear the awe inducing background music they must be experiencing.

"Cool." Ariel zooms off.

They still stare for a bit longer. The tyranny of choice that they never had to suffer through in this life because they had to face tyranny of, like, actual tyranny.

"Okay, I know you're going to say not to exaggerate-"

"Actually, we should try a bit of everything. Because, I have a spell to figure out if food is bad for us and it works by on anything in a given volume."

Pause.

"And yeah, I do want to enjoy something other than military gruel."

"That's my boy." Gav kisses Herod on the cheek before departing to the meat-eater line.

Herod follows him after a second.

There is an incredible variety of food! It’s kind of untenable for them to take some of everything, but the trays are large and no one seems to be judging.

This place is so... rich that Herod is vaguely wondering if he is going to find out that it runs on slave labor or something.

But since he can't run a slave rebellion on an empty stomach. He and Gabe can pick a wide variety of things. A fraction is what they could reasonable eat in one sitting and another is thing that they could take back to their room and eat later. So they don't waste anything-

"Pfft, they are probably to rich to care about wasted fooded." Gavriel says this while picking ten varieties of soda.

"Likely, but still... at least I have a preserving spell."

Herod eyes the dessert line and picks four kinds of pie.

They go to the first floor to find Ariel.

Ariel is sitting at a table on the first floor, as promised. She has a tray piled high with meats and, separately, an entire pecan pie. She is currently efficiently stripping the meat from the bone with her teeth and a creative application of her personal force field.

They take seats in front of her. "I was worried that we got too much food. Not anymore."

In contrast, their trays have been completely covered with food, but not piled high.

"I love the visual of the tiny piece of pie for dessert next to the carnivorous feast."

“Mutant powers have a tendency to make your metabolism go kind of crazy. Mine do so more than most." She cracks one of the bones lengthwise and licks out the marrow, leaving faint scratches in the bone itself with her tongue. "Which is to say: Meat. Good."

"Meat good," Gavriel agrees sagely, lifting a chicken wing.

Snort. "Meat good." Herod says, though he lifts a mozzarella stick.

Ariel returns to her feast.

Before either demon actually starts eating, Herod casts Lesser Detect Food and then he stares at their trays for a bit. He removes a few of items from the tray (some heavily processed snacks) and then they start digging in.

Well, it's a good thing that large appetites are commonplace in this cafeteria. They probably need better table manners. They eat with their hands and feed each other with their hands as well. "Why is your world so wonderful?"

Ariel notices this before long, and educates the demons in the use of silverware.

"There's a lot of complicated reasons. Food specifically? Because we've had a really long time without any major, life-shaking wars in which to specialize heavily in food production and preparation."

Okay, silverware isn't that hard to learn and they can definitely exercise self-control. Or at least, Herod can and then he can feed Gav while the later is sitting on his own hands.

"Huh, I guess I should've guessed that one, just by knowing how things are in Tartarus and then reversing." And that's too long without taking a bite. Nom. "How abnormal is this food selection compared to the rest of the world? I don't think our Emperors eat this well."

"Better than most places. Whateley has some actual gourmet chefs on staff. They don't do most of the cooking, but everybody in the kitchens is at least competent, and the ingredients are high quality. But it's not super out of the ordinary - a meal in a restaurant with reasonable portions of stuff like this would run a day laborer about two or three hours' wage."

Herod makes some mental calculations. "Okay, our emperors likely still eat better, but they still pay a lot more and need magic. Very impressive."

"And more importantly. It means that now we can eat tons. Too bad that Morty is straight, because I am sure feel like thanking him for contributing to me eating this pie." Nom.

"I honestly don't know if this is you being you or if this is the pie being that good."

"The pie's pretty fuckin' good," Ariel says around a mouthful of her own pie.

There is a couple of mouthfuls of agreement from the other side of the table.

After they are a bit fuller. "Can we take back the food to our door? I wasn't sure and I can keep it edible."

"...Should be fine this time. Don't make a habit of it, though. You don't need to, food's not going to be scarce here."

Slow nod. "I am sure Gav can eat some more and use his regeneration to burn the excess. So it isn't an intractable amount of food. If it helps, it isn't food hoarding because we are afraid. Just an ingrained habit."

"Well, you'll have time to work on it."

Gavriel frees one of his hands to pat Herod on the head. "Don't be a downer. Let's focus on the future and all the fun stuff there is ahead of us."

"Agreed!"

Ariel finishes her meal quickly. "Back to our respective dorms, then?"

The demons finish the last bite of things that are not easily transportable and pack their things.

"Yes, then."

"See you around, then." Ariel flies her tray over to the return, then flies off.

"See ya."

They mimic what the other students are doing and leave the tray and carry the food in their arms, pretending they're eating along the way.

The two are full enough that they don't have any plans to do anything else for the day. Just get to their room, strip off and throw themselves on the bed.

Nothing stands in their way.

Then they snuggle up and sleep.

They wake up hours before dawn. The bed is so comfortable that's easy to remember that they are in a new world. It's a good time as any to figure out how bathrooms and showers work here.

The answer: very, very well.

There's a telepathic interface to control the temperature, omnidirectional water jets, and various other ridiculous amenities. A small plaque in the bathroom reads SHOWER DESIGN + INSTALLATION BY HYDROFLUX. THIS BATHROOM COST MORE THAN A SMALL HOUSE.

It's objectively very impressive, but after the crystal hall they are able not to gap and stare.

Also, having the shower by themselves is very fun. Not even just in the lewd way. They get themselves squeaky clean and their horns polished.

They take their time brushing teeth and shaving. Herod is actually using Gavriel as a test subject for the shaving cream and razor, but Herod is good with a blade.

No one told them anything about putting on towels or bathrobes after leaving the shower area.

A boy walks in with a towel around his waist, notices the naked demons, and groans. He covers his eyes, but his curiosity soon overcomes his embarrassment, and he peers at them closely.

"Are you guys... new?"

"Literally arrived yesterday."

Herod turns to face the newcomer, putting the razor down. "Yes? Uh, is there a problem?"

"Not really. I just usually shower early, to avoid the parade of naked dudes, and it looks like I'm gonna have to get up even earlier. Also people usually shave themselves, but that's kind of cute actually."

Herod snorts. "Thanks, we are not used to this world and it's... things. We only are up this early because we went to bed pretty early too."

"The real question is why one would want to avoid a parade of naked dudes."

He sighs. "This is an LGBT space, not an 'everyone is gay' space. I like girls. And Sky. Anyway, I'm Hakim, nice to meet you - you're from another world? Who fucked up this time?"

"Uh? I didn't assume you're gay because you're in Poe. I forgot about that. Heterosexuality just confuses me."

"Gavriel or just Gav. And I am Herod." He points. "And it was Morty."

"He got us in his room, naked as we are right now."

"Fuckin' Morty." He shakes his head. "Anyway, I'm going to shower. Maybe put on a towel before you leave the bathroom, just a thought."

He enters the shower stall before taking off his towel, successfully hiding whatever parts he may have from observation.

"Hey, I am not complaining being taken here turned out great for us."

Herod notes the rules of etiquette, but does not immediately puts a towel on. It didn't sound urgent and he is busy getting this shave right.

They do put on towels before leaving. The plan is to stay in their bedroom - while copying slash memorizing slash categorizing their spellbook - until it's a reasonable hour.

It seems like people around here start getting up a little before sunrise. Some people, at least - there's outliers like Hakim, and it's pretty clear that not everybody's getting up yet, but that's when sounds of wakefulness begin.

In that case they will put on their fancy new clothes (even Herod likes the prospect, Gav only teases him a little about it). And then they will leave their room. Is everyone just going straight to get breakfast?

Most shower first. By the time they're done dressing, though, there's a couple of people heading over to the Crystal Hall.

Anyone that looks sufficiently approachable, so they can introduce themselves?

There's someone of indeterminate gender with very, very messy hair who's currently looking at them curiously. After a few seconds, they walk up and extend a hand. "Hi, I'm Alex! I haven't seen you guys around before!"

"Hi! We are Gavriel and Herod!"

They shake Alex's hand. "We are from another world and got here yesterday."

"Oh, wow! That's really cool, I don't think Whateley's had anyone from another world here in years! You're probably still finding your way around, do you want to sit with my team at breakfast?"

"Sounds great."

"Yes, thank you. And we are still getting used to things, yeah. ...Ariel described our world as medieval."

Alex starts off toward the dining hall. "Oof, so you're probably still getting your bearings. That can be tough, I know how- um, I can see how that would feel." Alex looks kind of shifty for a moment, then clears up. "Oh, and I'm a boy today, if you can't tell."

The demons follow. "Thanks for letting us know. We haven't run into too much trouble yet. Mostly because this place is like some bizarre non-magical magical paradise. Honestly, I kinda want to thank Morty for bringing us here, but he is straight."

"You're unusually obsessed with his heterosexuality."

Alex winces. "That poor kid. I honestly wish I could be friends with him, but between our respective probability warping and rager status, it'd be a really bad idea. Still, he seems lonely."

"Probability warping?"

"Rager status?"

"Oh, uh, I'm a Warper, so I manipulate one of the fundamental forces of the universe? In my case and Morty's case, that's luck. The problem is that when you get two probability warpers in the same room, their powers kind of... start fighting each other? Because you can't both be luckier than the other. So the side effect of this is that really weird shit starts happening when you get two probability warpers together, and that's one of the reasons I can't be friends with him. The other reason is that he has Diedrick's Syndrome, which gives him manic episodes and fucks with his emotional regulation, and I'm a Class-3 Rager, which means that when I get really angry I won't stop fighting until I'm down or everybody else is, and I get more powerful when I'm raging. Because ordinarily I'm a midlevel Esper/Mage/Warper, but when I'm raging I'm one of the biggest threats on campus. So if he got all 'you pathetic worm' at me, I might end up turning him into a slime mold."

"Yikes! I guess you could become pen pals, but as much Gav feels like praising him, I don't think it's worth the risk. On either end."

"Yep."

They reach the Crystal Hall. "The Hemitheoi - that's my team - our table's over there," Alex says, pointing to a table near the edge of the available tables. "Let's meet up there after you've collected your breakfast?"

"Sounds like a plan. See you in a bit."

They go collect breakfast.

They are really baffled that this place has different menus for different kinds of the day. Oh, well, they don't need to try everything in a day. They go find the Hemitheoi.

The Hemitheoi are sitting around the table and chatting. "Honestly," says a black girl, "I don't know how you got your parents to let you get your tongues pierced. My mom would kill me."

Two identical boys shrug in unison. "Dad couldn't care less," says one, revealing a bright silver tongue stud.

"And Mom thinks she's cool for letting us," says the other, whose tongue stud is a softly glowing gold.

"Parents are so annoying," Alex sighs. Everyone else at the table nods, except for the boy sitting next to him, who looks mildly offended.

"Hi, Alex! May we?" Herod indicates two seats.

"I only remember one out of four of my parents, but I do agree that they can get annoying."

"Yeah, go right ahead!" Alex says. "Guys, this is Herod and Gavriel." The table's residents wave with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

"That's going to get confusing," comments one of the twins. "I'm Gavriil, hi. This handsome bastard to my right is Kostas. Codenames Dreamer and Ferryman."

"Don't do the Ouran thing," says the black girl, "it's incredibly obnoxious. Hi. Sheila Kamber-Green, codename Gnosis."

An Asian girl sitting next to her looks up from a book. "Sandy Cheung. Vanquish." She goes back to reading. Sheila kisses her on the cheek.

"You already know me," Alex says sheepishly, "but I forgot to give you my codename. Moira."

"And I'm Jack," says the boy next to him. "And my codename is Man Jack, because Jack of All Trades was taken and I'm a sore loser."

They sit down. Herod makes mental notes of each name and codename.

"Should we get codenames?" he asks before casting. "Lesser Detect Food!" it sounds like every language they know, overlapped, but distinct and comprehensible. "Oh, okay, everything is clear, Gav."

Gav takes a bite. Nom, pancakes. "I usually go by Gav, if that helps," he tells Gavriil.

Kostas smirks. “He also usually goes by Gav, so not really. Also, ‘lesser detect food?’”

“It sounded better in Greek,” Sheila comments. “Speaking of which, why did you suddenly speak in Ancient Greek?”

”And Chinese,” Sandy says, not looking up from her book. “And French, Portuguese, Latin-"

"We get it, Sandy," Jack groans. "Although... Sumerian, for me. Which is really weird."

"Ah, I used a different kind of magic than what you're used to, called spellwords where we are form. The apparent translation thing is a quirk."

Sandy nods. "Makes sense."

"Maybe Jack should sleep with you," Gavriil says idly. "Those sound handy."

Jack blushes. "I am not going to sleep with some random dimensional refugee! I have a boyfriend!"

"Hey, don't hide behind me," Alex giggles. "It's your God-given right to sleep with whoever you want, hon."

"You have sex-based powers? How? And how do I get sex-based powers? If the problem is your boyfriend maybe he could-"

"Maybe he could be informed that both refugees are above the local legal age of majority. No offense, Jack."

"Oh, that is a pity," Kostas says. "He's the only one of us who isn't... mature for his age."

Gavriil elbows him. "You sound creepy."

Jack blushes some more. "I- you explain it, Alex, you're better at it."

Alex rolls his eyes. "Jack's a power mimic - he can touch people and use their powers for about an hour. What's weird about him compared to other power mimics is that after mimicking the power, he actually keeps a teeny little bit of it, forever. What's weirder is that, due to the whims of the trickster god who gave him this ability, he can keep the power permanently if he has sex with the person who has it. Unfortunately, he's a prude."

"I'm not a prude! I'm just not some- mercenary nymphomaniac who goes around fucking people for my own gain!"

"Right. So you're a prude."

"I was never more jealous in my life," Gavriel says with mock anger, "spellwords are all about reading and writing way too much and even empowering vices have their downsides."