She has never slept through a stormy night since she was a baby. Till she was seven her mother thought she was scared; her mother reassured her that the thunder couldn't get her, her mother told her over and over that it was just a sound and she should try to sleep. Bella told her she was wrong, but Ranae thought she was just putting on a brave face, denying fear so she wouldn't look babyish.
When she is seven she drags her mattress out the back door in the middle of a stormy night, flops onto it in the rain, and sleeps like a log in the pouring storm, and after that her mother realizes what is really going on in her head when she tells them storms don't scare her.
The mattress is ruined. Ranae replaces it. That one is destroyed the next time Bella is left unsupervised during rough nighttime weather.
Ranae gets her a hammock.
When Bella is eight she learns to really touch the weather, not just with her skin but with her self. It's delicious. She can't do it all day, so she still plays and goes to school and sleeps and eats and writes and reads books - but she does it a lot. Stolen moments, here and there, where she can feel the raindrops and the air - she can reach farther and touch the clouds - she can skim the tops of the clouds and the dry rarefied winds above them - she can reach farther and farther, grab shards of sunlight -
Sometimes it is a little hard to come back, but she gets tired if she stays out too long.
She can change stuff she touches. She can "breathe", and the wind will swirl this way or that. She feels like she is the sky, sometimes, when she's in deep, and the sky-self is even clumsier and harder to control than her regular body, but she can move it if she tries. (This is also tiring, but she gets better and better with practice.)
By the time she is nine, weather happens around her all the time. It's mostly humidity, and temperature - the air is dry when she's happy, wet when she's sad, hot when she's angry, cold when she's calm. But sometimes rain comes to comfort her - even indoors - sometimes winds kick up and break Ranae's good china, sometimes there are tiny playful bolts of lightning, and they seem to like Bella, but just as though they were badly trained puppies that doesn't mean they won't bite other people.
Of course Ranae takes her to a magic-checker. But the magic-checker insists on doing his tests indoors, in a nasty stuffy room, and no weather to touch at all (there's barely oxygen), and Bella is unhappy and nothing happens because the air is behaving in a very unskylike way. The tests all turn up negative. Bella goes home. Ranae writes it off as "just one of those things", though when prompted for a list of those things, she cannot produce one.
Bella plays with the sky. Work small, be big. Feel small, think big. She makes tiny little breaths, because they're easier to control; but she inhabits the biggest storms that she can, stretching miles across and miles high, a billion drops of rain. She sinks deep into the tiniest snowflake crystals and puffs of air and beams of sun to feel how they work; but she imagines being the whole sky, over the whole world, and dancing.
By the time Bella is ten, she no longer makes indoor weather unless she chooses to. (It is always very dry where she keeps her notebooks.) It rains in the vicinity of Firebird City exactly twice weekly, as more would harm local flora, but when it does rain it's usually a doozy, intense thunder that shakes the windows, lightning that crackles between the clouds. Sometimes she calls down just a little bit of lightning, when Ranae's not looking, and it touches her outstretched hand, and she feels all aglow and invigorated, like instead of being the sky the sky is being her.
This is not one of the rainy days, but that doesn't mean there's nothing to see (and it means that Stormy can have a book with her, when she takes breaks from being the sky, without it getting ruined). She's sitting on the roof - she can get to a shallowly sloped part of it from her window without much danger of falling - and she's being clouds. Her teachers say that clouds aren't really puffy like pillows, but that they're more like fog. They're right, but even fog feels soft to her. She sinks into the clouds, she is the clouds, the clouds are her, the bit of her on the roof is of negligible importance.
It's flying east, of course - that's the way the wind is blowing - and eventually it's far, far away, and Stormy likes that cloud and wants to keep it. She follows it. She can be bigger. She can be so big.
So very big.
Maybe she can be the whole sky and follow all the clouds from when they're born to when they die.
Her favorite cloud is piling up with some others over there. They're going to be a storm. It's far away, but Stormy's so big now.
She seeps into the storm with her cloud. This is a nicer one than she's ever been able to find directly over the city.
"If you go far enough, or get carried away enough, or stay away for long enough, you can lose your way back to your body. It'll die without you, and when your body dies, your mind dies too. That's the way you were headed just now, if I hadn't brought you back."
"My name's Mathilde. I'm a mage. One of my specialties is finding ambient mages - that's people with magic like yours, that most magic-checkers don't know how to look for. When I find one, I make sure they have the right kind of learning to do their magic safely."
"That's not the kind of question I can just answer right away," she says. "It can take years to learn everything, especially if your magic is powerful or unusual, and yours is both. The best thing for your magic would probably be if you went to Winding Circle Temple, near Summersea, and studied there for a few years until you understood it all."
"As the discovering mage, it's my responsibility to find her a teacher," she says. "And as far as I know, there aren't any other weather mages in Emelan to take her on. Winding Circle is the closest place she could get a better education than I could give her by myself. The next best option is that I stay long enough to teach her the very basics, and then leave you both alone - but that's not a real magical education, just a stopgap to make sure she doesn't misplace her mind on the winds."
"Well, I happen to know the woman who runs the girls' dormitories, so you won't have anything to complain about there," she says. "The whole temple is laid out like a spiral, with one winding road that circles in from the main gate, hence the name. Most of the adults there are temple dedicates, so you'll see them in blue or red or green or yellow robes, and the novices in white. But you don't need to dedicate yourself to the temple, or even plan to, in order to learn there. Some very famous mages have gotten their educations at Winding Circle and gone on to have their careers elsewhere."
Bella goes up the stairs, carefully taking each step, and comes back down with a notebook after a minute. "We did a unit on magic in history," she tells Mathilde. "I wrote down all the great mages the teacher talked about." She hands over the notebook, opened to the correct page; in neat but childlike handwriting it lists a large number of great mages, ranging from "Crane" to "Sandrilene fa Toren".
"Stormy, Ranae, this is Dedicate Honey," laughs Mathilde. "Honey, this is Ranae Swan and her daughter Bella, who likes to be known as Stormy. I wrote ahead about them; did you get my letter?"
"Oh, yes," says Honey, nodding. "I'm so pleased to meet you both. Come inside; I've found just the place to put you."
"Don't worry, you will," says the dedicate. "It's this way."
And she leads them to a little cottage, isolated from most of the other buildings and surrounded by gardens. There is a fence, but the corresponding gate is open; Dedicate Honey walks right past it and up the path toward the cottage door.
"Rook! Sedge!" she calls out. "Your new guest has arrived!"
Upstairs is a little open area with a little table under a little window, and three more rooms, all with closed doors.
Well - one of them is merely ajar.
Back downstairs, Mathilde and Honey have left, but Sedge is there.
"Hello again," he says. "Do you want me to show you where to set up your hammock?"
The sky is different here; the winds carve different roads and there's more salt and moisture and the sunshine's angle is just slightly different. It's a fine sky, though. She likes it. She doesn't go more than about a mile away, plenty to get the feel for the area immediately around Winding Circle but not enough to endanger her.
She comes back to her body about an hour later and gets out of the hammock and goes inside to see if anything is being interesting.
"—so Serahila should have magic too, that's how it's supposed to work, but nobody knows what it is. And she doesn't like to talk, which is why I'm saying all this for her. My magic's with ink and paper, which is all one magic even though it sounds like two different things, and Mercy does thread and cooking, which is exactly the number of different things it sounds like. People don't usually have two different kinds, but Niva got hers because she was struck by lightning, which she doesn't like talking about, probably because it was painful and scary. And Rook is a plant mage and Sedge is a stone mage, and that's everyone at Discipline."
"That's just its name," says Rook. "As far as I can tell it's just a temple-y sort of thing to name a building and that's that. Discipline cottage is traditionally a home for children who don't fit in the regular dormitories, for one reason or another. You, for example, like to sleep outside in a hammock."
"I wonder what all these other kinds of magic are like. I didn't know I was magic instead of some other thing of some kind till Mathilde told me, and I'm starting to wonder if everybody's magic is just a some other thing of some kind to everybody else's magic. The weird kinds, I mean, not academic magic."
"The weird kinds are called 'ambient'," Rook says helpfully. "And 'a some other thing of some kind' is a good way to put it. The different kinds of ambient magic aren't necessarily anything like each other, especially if they're very different. Sometimes we talk about 'craft magics' like metal and thread as different from 'natural magics' like weather and plants, but even those categories aren't perfectly clear; metal can be found in nature, for example, and plants are often cultivated in ways some people might consider a craft."
"Farmers and gardeners keep plants in particular arrangements for particular purposes. Some gardens are just as decorative as a gold necklace, and some are just as useful as an iron hammer, and they get that way through the care and attention of people. And of course there's miniature trees. Those are crafted in what might be a more familiar way - their custodians encourage them to grow in specific shapes, for magical reasons or just because they're pretty that way."
"These are my tiny trees!" says Rook. "I'm very proud of them."
"You can make tiny weather for the tiny trees! That would be extremely cute," he says. "But please make sure you're very good at tiny weather before you try to put it on the tiny trees. And only give them gentle kinds of weather. I don't think they will appreciate lightning even if it is very tiny."
"Weather magic is rare; lightning magic in particular is even rarer. Winding Circle is the largest concentration of ambient mages in the world, and I'm still surprised to have two students here at the same time who have magic with lightning. Even if one of them got it in an unfortunate accident."
"That's reasonably common with ambient mages, and craft mages much more so," says Rook. "Because our magic comes from things in the world around us that we might interact with in ordinary ways - and craft mages in particular have magic with processes and activities that aren't magical at all by themselves, that it's possible to learn and do in a completely ordinary way - it can be hard to draw a clear line between doing magic and doing things we just happen to have magic with. That's part of the reason why ambient magic is harder to spot than the academic kind. When an academic mage does magic, it's usually very obvious."
"Magic-checkers often only know the signs for academic magic, because ambient magic is so rare that it's very possible for a magic-checker to go their entire career without seeing one even if they know how to look. I'm sure he was very good at finding academic mages. You just happen not to be one."
"Academic and ambient magic are very much different kinds of things. Before people knew a lot about ambient magic - and sometimes even afterward, if no one who knew about it was around, or if it was a rare kind of ambient magic - people used to mistake it, the natural magics especially, for the work of spirits or elementals. And sometimes craft magic just looks like ordinary talent, and craft magic breakouts can look like ordinary accidents. Academic magic has signs almost everyone can see, but ambient magic usually isn't obvious to anyone but ambient mages, and often not even then."
"Sometimes. Spirits do exist, although we don't know as much about them as we might like. Under most circumstances, it's hard to tell they're there because they just go around doing the same things their natural phenomena were going to do anyway - the tide comes in and goes out, fires burn, winds blow, rain falls. The earth stays still, except when it doesn't. But sometimes a spirit gets attached to or tangled up with a person somehow, and then you get a person who makes natural phenomena behave strangely around them, and that can look similar to ambient magic, especially uncontrolled ambient magic. Fortunately, possession is even rarer, and these days we understand ambient magic well enough to realize that it's not the same thing at all."
"A magic breakout of any kind is when someone does magic by accident, or without understanding and controlling it. When you saw the magic-checker, he probably asked you or your parents if you ever moved objects without touching them, or saw or drew pictures in fire? Those are two of the most common breakouts of academic magic. Almost all children with that kind of magic do those things. Weather breakouts include raining indoors, sudden winds, lightning striking nearby objects... my magic breakouts tended to make flowering plants bloom whenever I walked by them, which sounds very pretty but can tire out the plants if it keeps happening. Part of the point of teaching magic is to stop the student having breakouts, because they're usually inconvenient and sometimes dangerous."
"It's commonly easier, more with some kinds of magic than others, to do magic to a large area when you are in the middle of it. And the middles of round things are more middley than the middles of, say, squares. In a square, parts of the edge are closer to the middle than the corners are. Winding Circle is very conveniently round, so the Hub is an excellent place to do things that benefit from middleness. Like earthquake protections, which is what Sedge was just renewing."
"Mercy got in fights in the boys' dormitory. I'm not sure what about or who started them, but I know he injured some other boys. Serahila needs her own room to sleep in or she doesn't sleep. Niva came with Serahila because they're twins. And when I was in the girls' dormitory some of the noble and merchant girls started being nasty to me because I don't know who my father was, and I told Dedicate Honey it would be much easier to move me away from them than them away from me even though I know I didn't do anything wrong, so she sent me here."
"I don't think so. He doesn't get in fights here, and Rook and Sedge aren't worried about that and they're the kind of people who'd worry about it if it seemed like a problem. I think Mercy is dangerous to some people some of the time but not to all people all of the time, and not to us."
"We have chores, and there's supposed to be a rotation, but Mercy always takes cooking and Serahila always takes cleaning so me and Niva don't usually have much to do except help Rook pull weeds and water his trees. Sedge teaches us meditation some afternoons, and other afternoons we study with our teachers. Rook is mine because there are no other paper mages at Winding Circle. Mercy has Dedicate Maple, the cook-mage in charge of the kitchens, and Dedicate Finch, the thread-mage in charge of the Air temple. Serahila doesn't have a teacher because nobody knows what her magic is, but she sometimes does extra meditation with Sedge when everyone else is with theirs. Niva studies with Spruce; she's a Fire temple smith."
"I don't know how people do it generally. Rook and I just sit and talk about magic and he suggests things and I try them. And he's teaching me how to make ink and paper. Or we're both learning it; I don't think he knew before. He says paper mages are very rare, and he says that's good because I don't have to be limited by tradition."
"Someone should check if that's true, because if it is, Rook and Sedge might want to draw circles around you when you do it. They say that it's important to have a circle when student mages are meditating because they might spill magic around and it could cause problems."
"You don't leak very much," he says, "but you do leak some. Until you learn how to meditate properly, I think it would be a good idea for us to make a circle around you while you're being the sky, to stop the leaking from going all over the place. But it's not as important as making a circle around all the students when they're learning to meditate together, so if we can't make a circle that stops the leaking but still lets you check out the sky, it'll be okay if you still check out the sky anyway as long as you do it out here by Discipline and not near the Hub or anywhere else magically sensitive."
"A lot of the same kinds of things that leaking, say, water might do. But magically. There are things, like paper, that if you get them wet they can be damaged or ruined; similarly, there's some kinds of magical things that are sensitive to leaked magic, and if they get too much on them they go wrong or stop working. And it's your magical power that you're leaking, so if you didn't leak, you'd have more of it to use for the things you want to do."
"It's not very much trouble at all. If you usually go up from your hammock, then it might be a good idea to get Sedge to make a circle under your hammock, because he can open and close his circles very easily once he's made them and they stay made even while they're open. When I make mine I have to pour circles of powdered plants on the ground and it is generally less convenient. So first let's see if Sedge can make a circle that lets you go up."
"Good!" says Sedge, standing up and dusting himself off. He pauses for a moment before stepping away from the hammock. "Just come get me if you want to do that and I'll close the circle for you. It'll open by itself if you step out of it, but it's a little more work to close it again afterward that way, so I'll try to keep an eye on you so I can open it for you when you're done. And if I'm not around, you can ask Rook to make a circle instead, but his are messier."
"Pretty good. I'm supposed to ask Sedge to close the circle around my hammock when I want to be the sky. Meditation sounds boring but it might not really be but if it is I'm stuck because I don't think I can do the stick fighting kind. Mercy's a really good cook and Elyth is really nice and I wish Niva liked lightning because it'd be fun to have someone to play with properly but she doesn't."
"Elyth is right on both counts. One of the things I just checked is whether or not anyone here has heard of a practicing ambient weather mage in this or any nearby country, and they haven't. So that leaves me as your teacher, unless you find someone else you like better who wants to teach you."
"I thought you might! When I've collected some good ones, I'll bring them here and you can borrow the ones you think are most interesting. And don't worry, it's my job as your teacher to read the boring ones and teach you anything useful they're hiding behind their boringness."