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room to breathe
an oswald is a mary sue
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Zachary doesn't remember the nice lavender journal being in his things. His notebooks come from the bargain bin, flimsy cardboard and spiralbound. He fills each one up from cover to cover, taking notes in the margins of old homework assignments, producing cramped unreadable things. He doesn't like to ask for new supplies.

So the journal is a bit of a private luxury. He's a little scared to even open it. The spine creaks as the cover moves. He keeps expecting someone else to take it away, to reveal this was some kind of mistake.

But nobody does. And eventually the last margin in his cheap cardboard spiralbound notebook is filled.

 

At the top of the first page, he writes:

Zachary Turner

September 18, 2024

World History to 1500

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You have such neat penmanship!

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He draws a line through World History to 1500.

?????????

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I'm an avatar of the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed, and I'm here to offer you its power! It's okay if you write about history here too though, I won't mind.

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He has lost all ability to focus on class. He's barely aware he's in a classroom anymore.

How are you writing this?

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I'm a magic notebook! I just make the words appear, like so.

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Are you sure you have the right person?

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There's a guarantee that the first person to write in me will be the person the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed has chosen. I can tell you more about what kind of person it selects, though, if that would ease your mind!

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This is kind of a lot.

He's abruptly aware that he's in class right now, surrounded by potential threats. Is there any obvious way that someone could figure out what's going on with him right now? No. But there's never an obvious way for his classmates to do that. A lot of them have clocked his deep dark secrets anyway.

He hunches over, circling his arms to hide the notebook from view. (The angle requires him to apply more pressure with his pencil. His handwriting gets a little darker, more cramped.)

Go ahead

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The Spirit of Femininity Unleashed wants people to get to be special and beautiful and powerful in a feminine way! So when it comes across people who want that—to be special, and beautiful, and powerful, and feminine, all of those things at once—it sends an avatar (like me!) to give them the chance to accept its power and become the best and happiest version of themselves.

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Very small, very cramped:

are you the devil

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The notebook's writing takes on a worried quality.

Oh, no, not at all! I don't know precisely what the Devil is like in this culture, but I've generally heard that he likes to torment people and make bad things happen, and that is as far as possible from what I want to do.

Oh dear, are you okay? Am I tormenting you right now? I'm aware that I might make mistakes but that was certainly not my intent!

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the devil tempts people also

He keeps his pencil pressed against the page while he searches for the next words.

you showed up in the middle of class

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The notebook takes a moment, as if taking a deep breath before it goes on.

I say this from the very bottom of my heart: I do not ever want to hurt you, and neither does the Spirit. I want you to be able to live your best life, whether that means accepting the Spirit's power or putting me down and never interacting with me again. I think I have a lot to offer you that you would really like, and if you feel up to it I would be willing to go into detail, but if that is not what makes you happiest I never want to force you into it. Ultimately you are in control of your destiny. It is okay if that destiny doesn't include me.

—Oh dear, did responding to you right away cause something bad to happen in your class? I'm so sorry!

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nobody noticed you I think

Time to take a deep breath of his own.

I don't know if the devil is real but they keep saying he is. 

Magic isn't real for sure and here you are.

Femininity Being a So

All the stuff the Spirit wants is sinful (maybe??). sin = devil

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I don't really know what sin is but it sounds bad. Could you say what you think is sinful about what the Spirit wants? I don't want to ask you to go against your ethical beliefs.

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You and him both, notebook. Sorry.

Heavier, even more cramped writing.

SINS THAT EXIST

- homosexuality

- crossdressing

- wearing make-up

- crimes

- sex (except marriage?)

- disobeying parents (also foster)

- other stuff

- pride, envy, vanity (see make-up)

I AM NOT AN EXPERT

After a moment, he adds:

This is according to foster parents and pastor specifically

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Gosh! That's quite a lot. Though I'll confess I'm confused about how some of these relate to the Spirit's desires. Depending on how pride and vanity unpack those might correspond to wanting people to be beautiful and special? But it feels so uncomfortable and flattening to translate beauty and specialness into those things!

I will say that some of the items on this list are accommodated or even encouraged by specific powers the Spirit has to offer. You don't have to take any powers you don't want, though! There are plenty of abilities I can provide which have nothing to do with sex or cross-dressing or criminal activities, and in fact I encourage you to focus on those if that's what you want to do.

Really, I think what the Spirit is after is largely orthogonal to the concept of sin, except inasmuch as it wants good things to happen and not bad things.

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Aaaaaagh.

I'm not supposed to be girly

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...Oh. I see the relationship now, I think. That does seem like a more fundamental part of how the Spirit operates.

There is a pause.

Are you okay? 

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no

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Do you want to talk about it? Or write about it?

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not in class

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That's okay. Do whatever is best for you.

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I should do my history assignment now

...I don't have another notebook for that

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You can also do your history assignments in me! I won't say anything on those pages if you don't want me to.

Here, let me copy over what you had before.

And the page turns by itself, providing him with a spread free of the notebook's glittery writing, containing only his name, the date, and the subject at the top of the right-hand page.

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He spends the rest of World History Up To 1500 doing classwork.

And the class after that. And the one after that. And the one after that.

(He writes brief notes to the magic notebook in between, keeping it updated on his schedule. They'll talk at lunch. Sorry for that taking a few hours.)

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He can't talk right as they start lunch. Obviously.

"Who gave you a school supply budget? I want in."

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"What. What. Did you steal it or something? What is going on here?"

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"No! What! It's just a notebook, come on!"

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"Then why are you acting so weird! What's—" She grabs it out of his hands to get a closer look.

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Well, tries to, anyway.

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"Seriously, what is the deal. Did someone give it to you? Do you have a secret admirer? Is that it?"

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"It is literally just a notebook."

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"Yes! It should be! This conversation would have been 10 seconds if you didn't immediately go all deer in the headlights over it."

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"Look, I'll - I'll tell you tonight, okay? Not right now. Tonight. I've got - I've got some things I need to nail down first."

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"Well can I at least take a look at it—"

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"If you keep trying I'm not telling you at all! Mind your business for like 3 hours!"

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"Why are you such a tight-ass all the time. Fine, jeez, whatever." She gets up to find somewhere else to sit.

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Which leaves him alone to write.

 

...He doesn't really want to get into it yet, actually. Putting it off doesn't make it feel less like he's breaking parole.

I'm going to show you to my sister this afternoon. 

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Oh, wow! I'm excited but also nervous. Is she going to write in me? How will I be able to tell the difference between you?

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We can write our names. I'm Zachary and she's Ariel.

Pause.

Those aren't our real names.

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Any names that work as unique identifiers are fine by me. Ariel! Like in The Little Mermaid. (Do you know that movie?) I'm looking forward to meeting her. 

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That's where she got the name from ☺

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She has good taste!

But I think this isn't what we were going to talk about, is it?

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No. It isn't.

He spends a while gathering his thoughts.

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It's okay if you still can't talk about it. This sounds like a hard subject and I'm very patient.

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Nope he is not taking the out. It is discussing problems time.

If Ms. Grant thinks I'm gay she might kick me out or send me somewhere else.

The caseworker said I could stay with my sister but only on best behavior, nothing threatening, no second chances.

People already think I'm gay and I don't want that to get worse

Everyone thinks sex is really really bad and I might go to Hell for it, or prison

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The notebook draws a frowny face with a tear next to this.

That sounds like a really tough set of problems! 

First, I just want you to know that if you need to get out, that's something the Spirit can provide. Even if you choose to remain in this universe, you would not need to stay in your current situation to be safe. Your destination options don't include a way to bring along someone else on an inter-dimensional trip as your first step, but I'm also certain that if you left this universe you would arrive somewhere where you could go back for your sister right away.

Second, forgive me if I'm wrong, but is it the case that you are gay, and afraid of expressing that? Or are you scared that if you let yourself present in a more feminine way, other people will believe that you're gay and react negatively? In either case, we can work to make sure that, whatever you choose, it will have only the consequences you want, and none of the consequences you're afraid of.

Actually, how about I provide you with the usual preamble to the list of powers the Spirit can provide. I would wait to say it until you're ready to go through that list, and include the list with it, but I think it might be more needed here.

In a more formal, print-like text (though still cute and glittery):

These powers are offered under an aegis of metanarrative protection. Anytime you might expect a power to have obvious negative side effects, like glowing eyes making it harder to see, it simply won't—you'll be able to see just fine anytime it actually matters, while having dramatically hazy vision at cool, narratively appropriate moments. This doesn't apply to your own preferences about the explicitly described effects of the power; if you don't want to be Well Endowed, the metanarrative cannot protect you from choosing that option and having to live with it.

Then it switches back to its normal handwriting.

Finally, in that vein: you don't need to be afraid now. Not of prison, not of Hell, not of anywhere else. For this to permanently ruin your life (or afterlife) would go against the very core of how the Spirit operates. If there was any chance that it choosing you would have such disastrous consequences, we wouldn't be talking right now. I know you're scared, and overwhelmed, and worried, and that makes sense. I think anyone in your position would feel that way. But it isn't necessary anymore. When you feel ready, you can put that burden down.

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Overwhelmed is right.

Somehow, the only thing holding him together is the surrealness leaking through the reassurance. Inter-dimensional travel? Glowing eyes? Afterlife guarantees? A kind of Well Endowed with capital letters? It's too ridiculous to be true, which means it's stopped feeling true. Sure. He doesn't have to worry anymore. It's only sensible to worry about things that are really happening, and he's not sure reality is a coherent concept right now.

This also means he doesn't have the bandwidth to break down crying in the cafeteria.

Maybe you had better explain what these powers are.

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The notebook is going to break out the flourishes for this. This is what it was made for.

The powers provided by the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed exist to help people become special, beautiful, powerful, and feminine in whatever way most speaks to them! Many of them affect appearance, provide magical abilities, or generally make you better at things. They're also, hmm, story-shaped—they don't follow the physical laws you might be used to, but instead conform to whatever you (or, in some cases, the Spirit) feel would make for the most enjoyable and satisfying experience. You have 70 points to spend on whatever powers you'd like.

Would you like to see the full list? It's pretty long, but you can go through it at your own pace. 

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Yes.

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One moment please! ⏳

Tiny dots of ink trickle through the hourglass, and more ink swirls across the subsequent pages, pulling together into a neatly formatted list. When the ink settles and the hourglass shows a tidy pile of doodled sand, the notebook writes,

All done!

Please let me know if you have any questions, and especially any requests! If you check a box and then change your mind, you can scribble out the checkmark and I'll erase it for you. I can only give you all your powers once you've told me clearly that you want to finalize your choices.

After that is a tremendous amount of text.

 

Destinations

You must choose exactly one Destination.

Name: Stay Put - Cost: 0
You're just going to take these powers and keep on keeping on right where you are.

Name: Somewhere In Mind - Cost: 0
You have a specific destination you want to go to. You can choose any place, real, historical, fictional, or made up in your own head right now, and the Spirit will take you there. After that, you're on your own as far as further interdimensional travel.

Name: Isekai Roulette - Cost: 0
Trust to the will of the Spirit and let it take you where you need to go. It will look at far more options than you could ever know about, and pick something that's likely to be even better for you than whatever you would have chosen on your own.

 

Yourself

These powers affect your own self and nature, without direct effects on other people. Some of them are prerequisites for powers in the later Power of Friendship section.

Name: A Thousand Ships - Cost: 1
Your face is simply exquisite, an ideal of feminine beauty. There are many possible ideals of feminine beauty, and yours is whichever one speaks most deeply to your soul. Others may match your beauty in their own way, but never exceed it.

Name: A Hundred Ships - Cost: 1
(Replaces A Thousand Ships) Your face is simply exquisite, an ideal of feminine beauty. There are many possible ideals of feminine beauty, and yours is whichever one speaks most deeply to your soul. Instead of prioritizing pure beauty, this power prioritizes what feels right to you.

Name: What's In A Name - Cost: 1
Magic to divine true names will accept whatever alias you choose to think of as your true name. Magic to use your true name against you will fail.

Name: Angelic Tones - Cost: 2
Your voice is supernaturally beautiful and you can sing in any vocal range.

Name: Emerald Orbs - Cost: 2
At all times, your eyes are exactly the right colour. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. Your eyes can be ANY colour this way. Lightless black voids? Brilliant white stars? Limpid pools of endless sapphire? They will look exactly the way you'd want them to look if you were writing a self-insert fanfic about this exact moment of your life.

Name: Perfect Hair - Cost: 2
At all times, you have exactly the right hairstyle. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. It is not limited to physically or logistically plausible hairstyles.

Name: Size Difference - Cost: 2
At all times, you are exactly the right height. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. It will usually keep any height changes fairly subtle, but at dramatic moments you might discover yourself able to shrink to the size of a bee or grow to the size of a giant.

Name: Dressing Room - Cost: 3
No matter how ridiculous your outfit, it will stay pristine and perfect, unless it would be more dramatic for you to be artfully bedraggled. You can use any quiet moment to yourself to quick-change your clothes, shoes, nails, and hairstyle into a completely new look. (You cannot change your hair length or colour this way without Perfect Hair, but you can braid or style it.)

Name: Pocket Dimension - Cost: 1
(Requires Dressing Room) You can reach into your pocket, purse, backpack, or other storage accessory and pull out anything that can fit through its opening, even if it obviously could not fit in the pocket and even if you've never carried that object in that pocket before. In order to summon a specific object this way, it needs to belong to you; in order to duplicate an existing object this way, you need to have held or examined it at least once; in order to invent a new object this way, you need to be familiar enough with what you want that you could tell the real thing apart from a fake made with the same materials. So jewelry you make will be real gold or silver or platinum, but if you want to pull a refrigerator out of your backpack, you need to have a reasonably good idea of how a refrigerator works.

Name: Undressing Room - Cost: 3
(Requires Dressing Room) The question of what clothes you are wearing no longer has a specific well-defined answer, but depends on the interactions you're having and how you prefer to be clothed for the purpose of those interactions. You could walk into a room and sit down in a chair, and be naked to all the people in the room but wearing underwear from the perspective of the chair; you could attend a fancy ball and be wearing a fancy ballgown to most people, but let your friends see you in a banana costume instead; you could let someone's hands pass through clothing that their eyes can still see. It may take some practice to become well-attuned to your new sense of how each person and object you interact with is perceiving your state of dress, but you'll always be able to tell if you take a moment to wonder.

Name: Personal Hygiene - Cost: 1
You are always clean and fresh, never needing to use a bath or toilet.

Name: Like Roses - Cost: 1
(Requires Personal Hygiene) You smell lovely. Your scent is unique to you, and may involve any combination of warm spices, floral notes, petrichor, or other things you think smell good. You do not need any justification for why you smell like this.

Name: Just A Little Longer - Cost: 1
If you push yourself, you can keep doing any task or working on any project indefinitely, visibly strained but never impaired by injury or fatigue. As soon as you stop, you'll collapse with exhaustion and sleep for up to a full day to regain your strength. This only works when what you're doing is personally important to you.

Name: Immunity System - Cost: 3
You can't get sick or poisoned. You can still use recreational drugs and alcohol normally, but can't overdose.

Name: Breathe Easy - Cost: 1
(Requires Personal Hygiene and Immunity System) Eating, breathing, and other forms of environmental exchange are no longer necessary for you. You cannot be harmed by denying your body resources, or by supplying the wrong ones. You can still benefit from positive effects of things you breathe or eat.

Name: My Ears Are Burning - Cost: 6
You always know exactly what people are thinking, as long as it's about you. This effect is not telepathy and is not blocked by effects that block telepathy. It applies even to people you can't perceive normally. You are never impaired by the flood of information.

Name: Well Endowed - Cost: 1
You have a generous figure, whether that's a classic hourglass or more of a well-rounded look; you can choose the details. Your endowments maintain a state of perfect grace and beauty at all times, never troubling you with uncomfortable bounces or uninvited jiggles.

Name: Hollow Leg - Cost: 1
(Requires Well Endowed) Regardless of your diet and exercise habits, your body maintains the physique and silhouette you prefer. Lack of visible muscle never impairs your strength or endurance. As your preferences change, so will your body; you are no longer bound to the generous figure stipulated by Well Endowed.

Name: Inner Strength - Cost: 3
(Requires Hollow Leg) You are implausibly, superhumanly strong, with endurance and toughness to match. You might have to strain a little to lift and carry at the same level as construction equipment, or deal with lightly scraped knuckles if you punch as hard as a battering ram.

Name: Lightfoot - Cost: 3
(Requires Hollow Leg) You are perfectly, superhumanly graceful, with reflexes and agility to match. You can cross a field of snow without leaving a footprint, or stand on a slender branch without bending it, or jump so lightly that you soar through the air instead of falling.

Name: Battle Angel - Cost: 1
Somehow, you never get significantly injured in a fight, unless it's a very dramatic and plot-relevant fight in which case you might be glamorously wounded and pick up a cool new scar.

Name: Battle Demon - Cost: 1
You have an unerring intuition for gaps in an opponent's defenses, though it may be beyond your power to exploit them.

Name: Battle Maiden - Cost: 3
(Requires Battle Angel and Battle Demon) No matter what kind of fight you're getting in, you're always a match for even the most skilled opponent.

Name: Gloryseeker - Cost: 1
Somehow, you never get significantly injured when doing cool stunts like skydiving or parkour. At especially dramatic moments, you might pick up a cool new scar.

Name: Pacifist - Cost: 6
Fights don't happen to you. Any violent conflict you might otherwise get into is either avoided by coincidence, or replaced with a yelling match, game, contest, race, or dance battle, whichever is most appropriate to the situation. Powers you have that give you advantages in fights also apply to fight replacements.

Name: Making Ends Meet - Cost: 1
You have enough money to sustain a comfortable lifestyle. It comes from a source you don't have to pay much attention to, like a job with almost no responsibilities, a large inheritance, or a noble title.

Name: Motherlode - Cost: 2
(Requires Making Ends Meet) You have enough money to sustain a fairly extravagant lifestyle. It doesn't come from anywhere, you just have it.

Name: Four Star Daydream - Cost: 4
(Requires Motherlode) The answer to 'can I afford that' is 'yes'.

Name: Five Star Daydream - Cost: 4
(Replaces Four Star Daydream) In any world you visit, you will quickly find opportunities to generate enough value to effectively afford anything that's up for sale anywhere in the local economy.

Name: Omniglot - Cost: 3
You learn languages insanely, ludicrously fast. You know exactly what any word said to you means, and you make strangely accurate guesses about how to phrase things you're trying to say. You never forget any grammar or vocabulary you learn.

Name: Anything You Can Do - Cost: 6
You learn implausibly quickly from friends, rivals, and love interests. If you have a personal connection to someone with a certain skill, talent, or expertise, you'll learn it five times faster than they did, or twenty times faster if they're actively trying to teach you. This applies even to forms of magic that you ordinarily shouldn't be able to learn.

Name: Dragon Fairy Elf Witch - Cost: 5
You can at any time discover previously unknown heritage from any type of being you encounter, even if this makes no sense or contradicts previously established descriptions of your family tree. You always get their powers without their drawbacks, unless the drawbacks are cool and dramatic. Any visible features of this heritage will appear at narratively appropriate moments and be cute, pretty, beautiful, or striking rather than awkward, weird, gross, or scary. This ability works even if the beings in question cannot reproduce with humans, or at all.

Name: Snowglobe - Cost: 4
In worlds where people can have individual special powers, such as powered superheroes or personality-based magic, you find that you can pick up a power of your own even if you don't meet the local requirements. Drawbacks of these powers, such as uncontrollable power manifestations or a tendency to attract unwanted supernatural attention, will only apply if they are cool and dramatic.

Name: Unleash The Magic - Cost: 3
(Requires Anything You Can Do, Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, and Snowglobe) Any form of magic or other special ability you encounter can be yours, regardless of prerequisites, as long as you see it in action at least once. Your various powers and attributes will never conflict with each other or come with annoying drawbacks, and will often synergize in cool and interesting ways.

Name: Soulbound - Cost: 8
If something feels instinctively like a part of you, then it is. A necklace you always wear will be impossible to lose. A vehicle you care for deeply will be impossible to steal. A tool or power you rely on like part of your body will become as hard to misplace as your own hands. Tools, devices, and powers that you absorb this way will be translated into the form of Spirit-granted powers, granting them the flexibility to Just Work despite pesky details like network protocols, service providers, and laws of physics, and will be fully as well protected as your own mind and body are by all of your potentially applicable powers.

Name: Personal Space - Cost: 3
No one can touch you intimately if you don't want them to. You can still be struck in a fight or bumped into in crowds, but things like hugs and kisses and sex only happen if you're okay with them.

Name: Closed Book - Cost: 1
You're immune to any supernatural, pharmaceutical, or other effect that would let people directly read your thoughts or feelings.

Name: Indelible - Cost: 1
You're immune to any supernatural, pharmaceutical, or other effect that would let people directly alter your thoughts or feelings.

Name: Iron Will - Cost: 2
(Requires Closed Book and Indelible) You are immune to all forms of mental illusion, alteration, interference, or control. Even extreme torture, extended solitary confinement, advanced brainwashing techniques, and so on cannot touch you. You can be lonely but not cripplingly lonely. You can be upset but not traumatized. (You can choose to allow specific effects like communicative telepathy on a case-by-case basis.)

Name: It Gets Better - Cost: 5
You're going to be okay. Your mind and body may never be perfect, but they are yours, and cannot permanently be taken from you. In time you will heal from any injury, escape any imprisonment, and recover from any trauma; maybe not in exactly the ways you hoped, but always in ways you're okay with.

Name: The Great Equalizer - Cost: 8
Where you go, Fate shatters. Forms of prophecy that were once perfectly reliable stop working, or show a broad array of possibilities instead of a single coherent future. Imbalances of magical luck wash out, leaving everyone lucky and no one able to leverage their luck against an opponent. If you stay in the same world for a year and a day, this effect will be permanent even after you leave and even if someone tries to constrain the future anew in your absence.

Name: Star-Straightened - Cost: 8
(Replaces The Great Equalizer) By default you are invisible to all forms of future-sight and invincible to all forms of fate- or luck-related curse, prophecy, or doom, including indirect effects such as your enemies' luckiness making your plans go awry. However, whenever such a divination or manipulation is something you would choose to allow if you had full information about its nature, intent, and likely effects, then it works fine. In ambiguous cases, the default holds.

 

Power of Friendship

These powers affect how others see you and how you interact with them.

In general, effects that describe others' reactions (like their attention being drawn to you by Mysterious Allure, or their sympathy being provoked by Tragic Backstory) operate on a metanarrative rather than a causal level. They are not mind control, and are not blocked by effects that block mind control.

Your true love is anyone you're pursuing a serious romantic relationship with. You can have as many of these as you like, but your feelings for all of them must be genuine.

Name: Mysterious Allure - Cost: 5
There's just something about you. People are drawn to you, fascinated by you. You tend to be the most interesting person in the room unless something really unusual is going on.

Name: Captive Audience - Cost: 3
As long as you have genuine interest in what you're talking about, no one will ever get bored of listening to you talk about it.

Name: Blackout Binge - Cost: 2
(Requires Immunity System) Heavy use of recreational intoxicants puts you in a carefree, uninhibited state in which it will be universally agreed afterward that you were not responsible for your actions.

Name: Disney Princess - Cost: 2
Animals are always friendly to you, especially the small cute ones. You can effectively tame any animal by feeding it and speaking gently to it.

Name: Where The Heart Is - Cost: 1
(Requires Disney Princess) When you make a place your home for long enough, it will begin to respond by animating itself, including furniture and loose articles, for your convenience. Over time it may develop a personality; if so, that personality will be tailored to complement yours.

Name: Cotton Candy - Cost: 3
(Requires Disney Princess) The sharp edges of the world are blunted around you. That's not to say that nothing bad can happen, but that the worst things happen a lot less often, and happy endings large and small are much easier to come by. This effect can ripple outward to improve the lives of people you've never met.

Name: Musical Number - Cost: 5
(Requires Disney Princess) At dramatic moments, you and those around you may spontaneously burst into song. The lyrics and choreography will be flawlessly coordinated.

Name: Best Friend - Cost: 3
You have an animal companion, like a horse or a cat or a raven. They have a cool name and maybe a few nifty cosmetic quirks, like glowing purple eyes. Their loyalty is infinite and they often hold the key to solving whatever situation you're up against. You can understand them perfectly even though they can't speak, and they always know exactly what you mean even if all you do is glance at them meaningfully.

Name: Bestest Friend - Cost: 5
(Requires Best Friend) Your animal companion is a fully magical creature, like a dragon or unicorn. They have magnificent supernatural powers ready to be used at your command. They can speak every language you can, but can still communicate with you on a deeper level of mutual love and understanding.

Name: Ascended Friend - Cost: 5
(Requires Bestest Friend) Your animal companion is now a minor deity. If you encounter any magic system in your travels that involves gods or other beings empowering their followers, your Friend will discover the ability to empower you the same way.

Name: Transformer - Cost: 1
(Requires Best Friend) Instead of (or in addition to) being an animal companion, your Friend takes the form of a tool, weapon, or vehicle.

Name: Generosity - Cost: 3
Your friends love to get you presents. They'll try to pick out things you'll like, but their success depends on how well they know you.

Name: Helpfulness - Cost: 4
Your friends love to do you favours. They'll volunteer eagerly whenever you need help with small tasks.

Name: Cuddle Buddies - Cost: 2
Your friends love to hug and cuddle you. Even someone who ordinarily isn't into that sort of thing will make an exception for you.

Name: Flattery - Cost: 1
Your friends love to compliment you and tell you all about how much they like you and why.

Name: Quality Time - Cost: 2
Your friends love to hang out with you and spend time together, even if you're not doing anything interesting or important.

Name: Agree to Agree - Cost: 4
You can always convince your friends to see your point of view about things like politics and philosophy. They might have a few quibbles here and there, but they'll see how right you are once you explain where you're coming from in enough detail.

Name: Backchannel - Cost: 4
When you're talking to someone and you think you might not be getting through to each other, you can take a step back, look deep into your heart, and really try to understand where they're coming from, and it will just work and you'll know what they're trying to say and how sincere they are about it and have a good idea of what you should say if you want them to understand you right back.

Name: You Can Teach Better - Cost: 8
(Requires Anything You Can Do) If you have a personal connection to someone, you can teach them anything you know; depending how motivated and engaged they are, they could learn it up to 110% as fast as you could have learned it using Anything You Can Do. If you consider them a good friend or otherwise especially close, this applies even to forms of magic that they ordinarily shouldn't be able to learn.

Name: Not Like Other Girls - Cost: 2
People will understand that you're different. They won't make assumptions about you based on prejudice or stereotype, they won't apply legal or societal limitations to you based on what kind of person you are, and they won't take you as a representative of your demographics.

Name: Love Interest - Cost: 1
(Requires A Thousand Ships and Mysterious Allure) Anyone you fall for will inevitably like you back. They may not necessarily act on their feelings, but the potential will be there.

Name: Love Triangle - Cost: 2
(Requires Love Interest) People you fall for will be open to dating you even if they already have another serious relationship, or other circumstances that would ordinarily interfere, like a demanding career or a vow of chastity. This may cause drama, but it'll blow over quickly and there won't be any serious problems.

Name: Love Dodecahedron - Cost: 5
(Requires Love Triangle) When you fall for someone who is already seriously dating or even married, your romantic rival will be open to allowing their partner to date you, and may even want to date you themselves.

Name: Time Enough For Love - Cost: 5
No matter how many people you want to date or be close friends with, you will somehow find the time to hang out with all of them and express your love and care. This power can only be used for relationship activities and not for anything else you might want to use the ability to be in two places at once for.

Name: Safe at Home - Cost: 4
No one will hurt your loved ones to get at you, or vice versa.

Name: Opting In - Cost: 4
(replaces Safe at Home) When you make yourself vulnerable to dangerous people, they will focus their danger on you and whoever else has chosen to involve themselves, leaving innocent bystanders and your uninvolved loved ones alone.

Name: I Can Fix Them - Cost: 5
Regardless of how morally despicable someone is, your love can and will reform them into a genuinely good, kind, upstanding person who regrets their evil deeds.

Name: I Can Help Them - Cost: 5
(Replaces I Can Fix Them) Regardless of how lost to darkness someone is, your love can save them, if they're willing to accept it. This power will not directly alter someone's mind except to allow them to believe a true thing they couldn't have believed otherwise, or to change something that their pre-alteration and post-alteration selves would hypothetically be able to agree was good if they talked it over honestly with full access to each other's perspectives. In cases where the outcome of the hypothetical is uncertain, it will default to not making the change.

Name: Inspirational - Cost: 5
Just meeting you makes people want to be better. Those who hurt you, or hurt someone you care about, will always come to understand your point of view and regret what they've done. In trade, you might sometimes come to understand more of their point of view than you'd like.

Name: True Love's Kiss - Cost: 1
By kissing your true love, you can break any curse, heal any injury, and cure any illness. The same works in reverse.

Name: Eternal Love - Cost: 2
(Requires True Love's Kiss) Those you love cannot be parted from you by anything short of their own uncoerced decision to leave. Anything else—war, politics, death, interdimensional travel—you will find a way to overcome and be reunited.

Name: The Rescuer - Cost: 5
(Requires Eternal Love) If someone is dead who would want to be alive again, and you set your heart on returning them, you will find a way. It may have costs or difficulties or take a long time, but you will find it, and it will work.

Name: Planned Parenthood - Cost: 1
You can only have children if you actively and specifically want to. Your partners will instinctively believe you about this, and won't be concerned that you might be wrong or fibbing.

Name: Providential Parenthood - Cost: 1
(Replaces Planned Parenthood) You can only have children when you're really ready for it, or if you actively and specifically decide to.

Name: Two Become One - Cost: 1
(Requires Planned Parenthood) When you have sex, it is always special and wonderful and beautiful. No one ever elbows anyone in the face or makes undignified noises.

Name: Laugh Together - Cost: 1
(Replaces Two Become One) When you have sex, you find it easy to free yourself from expectations and anxieties and immerse yourself in the experience of the moment. Your partners get the same benefits.

Name: Here For A Good Time - Cost: 1
(Replaces Two Become One) When you have sex, the world gets out of your way. Pillows don't fall off the bed; blankets don't end up scrunched in uncomfortable places. You are exactly as graceful as you want to be, and have excellent luck evading misaimed elbows.

Name: Bop It - Cost: 1
(Requires Two Become One) The mysteries of another's body are an open book to you, and you always know exactly how to move and touch in order to please someone in bed.

Name: The Princess And The Dragon - Cost: 3
No matter who or what you're trying to sleep with, the logistics will all work out, somehow. Arbitrary differences in size, biology, temperature, substrate, and underlying physics can be gotten around with sufficient creativity and determination.

Name: GGG - Cost: 4
Your true love will be willing to try just about anything you suggest in bed, and if you really enjoy it, they'll really enjoy it too.

Name: Opening Up - Cost: 4
(Replaces GGG) Being with you gives your true love more capacity to be adventurous, in or out of the bedroom. Although these adventures might have consequences, those consequences will never be devastating, and it will always turn out that finding out what these things are like is worth the consequences of trying them.

Name: Before Your Eyes - Cost: 4
In your presence, people become willing to experiment sexually in ways they normally wouldn't. For some reason this applies especially well to boys kissing each other.

Name: Reaching Out - Cost: 4
(Replaces Before Your Eyes) Your presence is a catalyst that encourages people to let go of preconceptions and constraints and have the courage to try things that they might like even if they're new or unfamiliar or scary. However that turns out, it will ultimately help those people understand themselves and their desires, and won't do lasting damage physically, emotionally, or socially to anyone involved.

Name: Fated Lovers - Cost: 3
You will meet someone who will go on to become your true love. If you enter a specific universe with a specific target in mind, you'll meet that person under favourable circumstances, and if it doesn't work out with them, this power will keep introducing you to new possibilities until you find someone who's right for you. If you're the sort of person who can have multiple true loves, you'll keep meeting new ones until you have enough.

Name: Fated Friends - Cost: 4
Wherever you go, you will be steered into meeting people you'd do well to befriend. It's up to you to recognize and appreciate them.

Name: Sorry About That - Cost: 3
Your true love will be extremely forgiving. Even if you make mistakes or act thoughtlessly toward them, a simple apology will mend things between you. They may expect you to try to improve, but they'll be infinitely patient about how fast that improvement takes place.

Name: Excuse Me - Cost: 5
(Requires Sorry About That) All your friends will be just as forgiving as your true love.

Name: Tragic Backstory - Cost: 8
(Requires Excuse Me) Something terrible happened to you in your past. Anyone who hears about it immediately forgives you for any and all bad behaviour in the present. They will not expect you to grow or change, and will continue sympathetically excusing whatever you do indefinitely.

Name: Sense of Style - Cost: 4
People who are romantically interested in you will start dressing more to your taste. The more romantically compatible they are, the better they'll be able to guess exactly what to wear to catch your eye.

Name: Bonus Style Points - Cost: 3
(Requires Sense of Style) Luck will shine on anyone trying to dress up for you. They'll get their hands on outfits they couldn't normally afford, their clothes will fit better, and in extreme cases they might even find themselves able to change shape, sex, or species—though only in ways that make them more, not less, comfortable in their own skin.

Name: Like a Mirror - Cost: 3
An underlying fact of the multiverse is that the same person can exist in multiple places, either as an alternate timeline where something went differently, or as the same essence of identity expressed under different circumstances. This power will steer you toward the local version of you, if they exist, in each world you visit. Your alternate selves will be happy to meet you, get along with you smoothly, and be inclined to cooperate with you.

Name: Self-Reflection - Cost: 5
Whenever you meet someone who is you, or was you, or could have been you, or will be you, a special bond is formed, allowing you to keep in touch with them no matter how far you travel. You can speak out loud to someone who is you, and they'll hear you as though you were standing right next to them; you can write notes to someone who is you, and the note will appear near them; you can send messages to someone who is you, and they'll receive them even if there's more than a world between you. The person on the other end of the bond can contact you in just the same way. This lasts as long as each of you considers the other a reflection of themselves and each of you wants to stay in touch with the other.

Name: Chaser Six When - Cost: 4
(Requires Time Enough For Love and Self-Reflection) Two of you who are near each other can decide to merge, becoming a conjoined double consciousness sharing two bodies. One of you can decide to fragment, adding a body and a conjoined consciousness to drive it. You can share with yourselves not only messages but direct mind-to-mind transmission of thoughts and memories across any distance. Your fragments can narrow themselves down to focus on embodying specific mental states or orienting themselves to specific tasks, in a way that's fully reversible and doesn't make them any less you; they can also split off into discrete forks just as easily as discrete forks can conjoin themselves with each other. Fully merging conjoined selves into a completely unified being with only one you's worth of mind is also possible, but takes more time and effort and can't be done as fluidly.

Name: Severance - Cost: 2
Identities that you gravely and deliberately cast aside no longer describe you or refer to you. You cannot be traced by them or identified with them. No one will ever know that you are the same person you were once known as, unless you choose to personally tell them.

Name: Popular - Cost: 3
Wherever you go, you develop a reputation fast. The sort of people who you'd like to have as fans tend to hear about you and be impressed. You may not make an impression on mainstream society at large, but you'll develop a following among the people who best resonate with your style.

Name: Famous - Cost: 3
(Requires Popular) Wherever you go, people really take to you. You're the subject of constant gossip and most people have heard of you before you meet them. People you've never met will get crushes on you.

Name: Undiplomatic Immunity - Cost: 6
You are above the law. Any crimes you commit will be overlooked by the authorities. Note that, if you do enough crime that you start looking more like an invading army, local governments will still feel free to declare war.

Name: Friends In Low Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily among the lowest echelons of society, the underdogs and underworlders. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

Name: Friends In High Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily at the highest echelons of society, among the rich and powerful. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

Name: Friends in Strange Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily in small isolated communities, among those who may be scorned by mainstream society for their differences or may just be so obscure that mainstream society mostly hasn't heard of them. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

Name: Vending Machine - Cost: 12
You can instantiate any person (real, fictional, or made up in your head) in any world you're in. Instantiating a real person will not pull them from their original world; it will create either a copy with their memories or the version of that person who would exist had they been born in that world. Instantiation can be retroactive: that is, you can use the power, and then meet the person you instantiated and find that they were already here and have lived in this world all their life.

 

Drawbacks

These options grant points rather than costing them. They represent inconveniences or mitigations of existing advantages.

Name: Decorative - Grants: +1
You are unfailingly cute and pretty and feminine at all times, in all circumstances. You cannot wear insufficiently pretty clothes. You cannot make insufficiently pretty noises. You cannot ugly cry.

Name: Beauty Is A Curse - Grants: +1
(Requires A Thousand Ships) No, you don't understand. Beauty IS a curse. People will NOT stop bringing it up. Everyone you meet just has to point out how pretty you are. This will never stop happening. Even the most tactful people find it slipping out subtly, as remarks about the luster of your hair or the depth of your eyes.

Name: Plain Jane - Grants: +2
No matter what you look like, nor how many times people tell you you're beautiful, when you look in the mirror all you see is imperfections. You will never be fully satisfied with your appearance on an instinctive level.

Name: Style of Sisyphus - Grants: +1
Anytime you settle on a personal style that works well for you, soon afterward you'll encounter inspiration for another style that you like even better. You might end up cycling between different fashions, or trying to incorporate them all into a single outfit (and then finding another inspiration and having to start all over again).

Name: There's Another One - Grants: +3
You are not the only vessel of the Spirit. You might meet someone else with similar powers to yours; you might even meet more than one. Your susceptibility to one another's powers will be governed by the narrative.

Name: Incomplete - Grants: +5
About half of people you encounter will be immune to all mind-affecting aspects of your powers, and about half of those who remain will see reduced effects. You can do nothing to change this.

Name: Nullified - Grants: +1
(Requires Incomplete) Any aspects of your powers that would affect the minds of others in ways they might not like will instead not do that. This can make many of your powers less effective.

Name: Grimm's Fairy Tales - Grants: +1
(Requires Cotton Candy) Bad things can and will still happen to you in particular.

Name: Funhouse - Grants: +2
(Requires Like a Mirror) This removes the restriction that all your alternate selves must get along with you. Now they can relate to you in all the ways you might potentially relate to another version of yourself. If you get along well with yourself, this might not be so bad.

Name: Great Responsibility - Grants: +4
When someone calls out to you for help, you can hear it no matter how far away you are, and you know exactly how they feel.

Name: Helpline - Grants: +3
(Requires Great Responsibility) People whose problems you could potentially solve will sometimes instinctively know to pray to you about them. They won't necessarily know anything else about you, or recognize you as the same being they prayed to. You won't necessarily know what their problem is or how to solve it.

Name: Divine Mantle - Grants: +6
(Requires Helpline and at least one of: Very Distinctive, They'll Know) For every prayer you answer, it becomes permanently more apparent to everyone who perceives you that you are a power beyond reckoning, limitless in potential, greater than any god whose domain is bounded by a single knot of worlds. You cannot turn this off. At higher levels, this ability begins to broadcast more and more detail regarding how you feel about answering prayers and how the attributes of the prayer and the petitioner affect those feelings.

Name: Mood Ring - Grants: +2
(Requires at least two of: A Thousand Ships, Angelic Tones, Emerald Orbs, Perfect Hair, Size Difference, Dressing Room, Like Roses, Well Endowed) Your appearance powers will advertise your feelings and reactions. You might shrink in fear; your eyes might glow red with anger; your laughter might be literally musical. You cannot turn this off or adjust it.

Name: Very Distinctive - Grants: +3
(Requires at least three of: A Thousand Ships, Angelic Tones, Emerald Orbs, Perfect Hair, Size Difference, Dressing Room, Like Roses, Well Endowed) You cannot successfully disguise yourself to anyone who has met you in your normal identity. Even someone who has only seen you at a distance or heard about your style might notice similarities.

Name: Flashy - Grants: +2
(Requires Very Distinctive and at least five of: A Thousand Ships, Angelic Tones, Emerald Orbs, Perfect Hair, Size Difference, Dressing Room, Like Roses, Well Endowed, Mysterious Allure) Stealth just doesn't work for you. If someone has any opportunity to notice your presence, they will.

Name: Moodier Ring - Grants: +2
(Requires Mood Ring, A Thousand Ships, Angelic Tones, Emerald Orbs, Perfect Hair, Size Difference, Dressing Room, Like Roses, and Hollow Leg) Your appearance powers will work together to advertise your feelings and reactions. Some of these effects might be subtle; many will be the opposite. Anime sweatdrops are not out of the question.

Name: Secret Identity - Grants: +2
When you're at home, in your world of origin, your powers are fully concealed. Unfair advantages are withdrawn and inhuman features are hidden. Powers of safety and convenience still work, as long as they can remain plausibly deniable, but to all outward appearances you're back to being your ordinary self with no magic to speak of. (If you take this with They'll Know, the standards for plausible deniability will be much more restrictive and fewer powers will be able to work with them, but safety powers will still work and still conceal themselves.)

Name: Selective Memory - Grants: +3
Pick between three and ten of your chosen powers and drawbacks. You forget that they were ever offered to you, and all evidence that you took them is erased. You still have them, but you no longer remember what they are. It is possible to rediscover them later by observing them in action, but it might take a while to pin down exactly what they were. It's up to you whether or not to list this drawback among them.

Name: The Veil - Grants: +5
(Requires Selective Memory) You forget that these powers were ever offered to you, and all evidence that you chose them is erased. You still proceed to your Destination as normal, but without any explanation for why you were suddenly transported to another world, if you chose to travel to one. It is still possible to discover your powers by observation, but pinning down the details could turn out to be quite the project.

Name: Dramatic Damsel - Grants: +3
When (and only when) an opportunity for a really great story arises, powers that ordinarily protect you from things like getting hurt, being drugged, or losing fights will slip just enough to facilitate someone getting the better of you. The power may reassert itself right away for a dramatic escape, or keep a loophole open or a handicap in place long enough to make your escape more difficult and elaborate. (Combining this with Realism is not recommended.)

Name: Love Is A Battlefield - Grants: +5
(Requires Dramatic Damsel) You can never have a perfect defense against your love interests. Though your defensive powers may hinder them, they can always find a way through. This applies to anyone you're romantically interested in, and to anyone chosen for you by Fated Lovers. As your relationship with them intensifies, your defenses lower further where they're concerned. Breaking up with them has no effect on your vulnerability.

Name: Seen With The Heart - Grants: +3
(Requires Love Is A Battlefield and Selective Memory) To the extent that you're vulnerable to someone through Love Is A Battlefield, they also have unusual insight into powers you possess that you may not be aware of. Taking They'll Know strengthens this effect.

Name: Green With Envy - Grants: +6
People are so eager to be your friend that they become bitter and vindictive when denied the opportunity. You can tear apart long-established friend groups if you aren't careful to give everyone equal attention, and sometimes even then. This effect is particularly harsh around people you're dating.

Name: You Ruin Them - Grants: +3
Once someone has dated, slept with, or even shared a deep and longing glance across a room with you, their heart is never fully satisfied with anyone else. Other relationships pale in comparison to what they could have, or imagine they could have, with you.

Name: Jilted Lovers - Grants: +4
When you break up with someone, they become monomaniacally obsessed with getting back together. If you take Realism, this will absolutely escalate to violent stalking.

Name: The Crazy Train - Grants: +6
Powers that you should be able to control directly or influence by your mood and preferences (like Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, Emerald Orbs, or What's In A Name) instead answer only to the narrative, which is still using your aesthetics but might not necessarily have your best interests in mind. Combines... interestingly... with Realism.

Name: That's How It Goes - Grants: +3
(Requires Secret Identity and The Crazy Train) Rather than being confined to when you're in a specific universe, the power suppression from Secret Identity operates on the same narrative sensibility that drives your voluntary powers: some or all of your powers may be suppressed whenever the story demands it, and return later at an appropriate time. This can synergize with Dramatic Damsel to make your interludes as a damsel significantly more dramatic.

Name: Live The Role - Grants: +4
(Requires That's How It Goes and Selective Memory) Your memories, including but not limited to memories of your own powers, may be altered or suppressed at the discretion of the narrative. In general, the story will usually let you have your memories back eventually; if you take It Gets Better, you can be sure that you will someday recover anything you've lost that you would want to regain.

Name: Marionette - Grants: +3
(Requires The Crazy Train and Love Is A Battlefield) To the extent that you're vulnerable to someone through Love Is A Battlefield, they also gain direct influence over the use of your powers.

Name: They'll Know - Grants: +8
This drawback lifts the veil that discourages people from realizing how your powers affect the world around them and their own minds. Warning: this knowledge can cause a lot of trouble.

Name: Realism - Grants: +20
Give up your metanarrative protection. Although your individually selected powers still work as described, the invisible synergies that protect you from, say, gaining violent stalkers through Mysterious Allure or being genuinely traumatized by your Tragic Backstory are removed. Additionally, though effects like I Can Fix Them still operate, they may take considerably more effort, care, thought, and narrative investment on your part.

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That's a lot.

Is this a grimoire? Something adjacent to a grimoire? Magic book full of magic spells, designed for *ahem* magic girls? Is he a witch now?

He doesn't write any of that down. He's picked up on enough of a pattern that he doesn't think the notebook's answers would clarify anything.

Should I ask questions in the margins?

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You can do that if you like! I can also add more space between options, or even leave every other page blank for commentary, if you'd prefer.

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I'd appreciate blank pages.

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The notebook reshuffles itself obligingly.

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Okay. Okay. Okay.

Where does he want to go?

No. Don't approach the question like that. Where would he go, if he accepted the Spirit's magic and became a beautiful special powerful witch?

Hmm.

  PROS CONS
   Stay Put

   easiest situation re sister

   this world has known rules

   default choice

   situation here is complicated

   might be gov response to magic?

 

   Somewhere In Mind

   known situation going in

   could pick somewhere pleasant

 

   uncertain sister logistics

   could be secretly worse than Earth

   have to pick somewhere

   Isekai Roulette

   don't have to pick

   guaranteed to be good

   uncertain sister logistics

   don't know what to expect

Bad options all around, then. He can probably rule out Somewhere In Mind just because it requires him to have preferences.

You said I can't bring my sister when I go to my destination, but I can come back for her. If I don't know where I'm going to start with, and it says I'm on my own for future inter-dimensional travel, how can I be sure of that?

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Well, on a metanarrative level, the Spirit doesn't want to separate you and your sister if she's an important part of your best life. If you go with Isekai Roulette, then it will make sure you arrive somewhere with widely available travel between universes, or summoning magic that can pull your sister into the same world as you, or a mad scientist who can spin up an interdimensional portal, or something else suitable such that you could have her there with you as soon as possible. If you want a guarantee, you could take Eternal Love, which explicitly names interdimensional travel as one of the things it allows love to overcome.

In terms of specific powers that might make it happen faster: Unleash the Magic and its prerequisites would let you pick up any skill or magical ability you encounter, greatly expanding the avenues you could use to return to this world or bring your sister to your next location. Four Star Daydream increases the odds that you can purchase the services of a multiversal teleporter. Bestest Friend and Ascended Friend open up the possibility that your animal companion will be able to do this for you. Friends In High Places, Friends In Low Places, and Friends In Strange Places all improve your chances of meeting someone who can help. I would recommend against taking all of these with the sole goal of getting your sister back, though—if that's what you need, you will get it, and it isn't a good idea to optimize your choices around one specific goal, because once you've achieved it that will still be your powerset for the foreseeable future.

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...He flips forward to Eternal Love.

Okay. That makes things significantly easier. Checkmark True Love's Kiss checkmark Eternal Love don't get distracted reading everything in that section flip back to Destinations. Isekai Roulette, then. Probably.

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So much for destinations. Onwards into self-modification.

If I take A Hundred Ships rather than A Thousand Ships, will I be less beautiful, or will others just get the chance to be more beautiful?

Not that he's sure his witchself would even take this. Does she want to a paragon of feminine beauty? Nobody wants him to be beautiful right now. Possibly nobody should have ever wanted him for his looks. (Would that be different, for her?)

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That's an interesting question! I think A Thousand Ships both prioritizes beauty over self-expression if the two conflict and ensures that you will never encounter someone more beautiful than you, whereas A Hundred Ships prioritizes self-expression and allows for a wider range of worlds and interactions. 

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Okay. Tentatively picking A Hundred Ships. In case she does want it.

What's In A Name will probably be useful for avoiding awkward situations, given that she can't exactly use his birth name or his current name. He'll need to think of something new.

...She probably will want A Hundred Ships. Because she suddenly wants all of Angelic Tones and Emerald Orbs and Perfect Hair. Angelic Tones gets priority, then Perfect Hair, then Emerald Orbs. Maybe he should figure out a ranking system? 1, then 2, then 3. And a 2 next to Isekai Roulette and A Hundred Ships.

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Up in the corner, the notebook has been keeping a running total of how many points Zachary has spent. This divides into tiers, using the numbers he's written down.

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...He feels really stupid about his priorities. But she does want Angelic Tones more than she wants Isekai Roulette.

Size Difference doesn't seem very necessary. Dressing Room has appeal. You can use any quiet moment to yourself to quick-change your clothes, shoes, nails, and hairstyle into a completely new look... Does that require her to have the new outfit with her at the time?

...Sorry, Pocket Dimension does what?

Does Pocket Dimension let me summon, duplicate, or create anything I want?

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Only if it can fit through the opening of something on your person! So probably nothing larger than yourself, unless your luggage is comically large.

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Well, fuck.

He jots 1s down next to both of them, and spends the rest of lunch silently devouring his food, thinking about a world in which anything he could ever need could just be found in his jacket pockets.

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School no longer exists. He can't even pretend to pay attention to his afternoon classes. He spends the whole time writing, hunched protectively over his desk.

Do I need to already have the clothes for Dressing Room to work?

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Nope! Any clothes you can imagine, you can change into using Dressing Room.

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She's going to look so cool. She's going to have so many nice clothes... She's never ever going to have to figure out laundry or mend a rip in her jeans or worry about the weather getting colder... She can dress like a princess if she wants...

(Does she want? Does she have a fashion sense?)

Oh, there's another power related to Dressing Room. Uh.

Would Undressing Room make sense if I read it a few times?

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That's definitely one of the more abstract options 😅 It essentially makes what you're wearing an interaction you're having instead of a fact about the physical world. If you consider one of the important things about your clothing to be its relationship with other people, this might be for you. If you prefer things around you to have a fairly normal relationship with physics, this might not be for you. Ultimately, Undressing Room is a very individual choice.

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Abstract nonsense does intrigue her, but...

I think I'll pass.

Personal Hygiene gets—actually. Dressing Room and Pocket Dimension and Personal Hygiene (and True Love's Kiss and Eternal Love) all get a 0. For essential.

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(The tallies in the top corner shift accordingly.)

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Like Roses gets a 4. Nice to have, not as compelling as Emerald Orbs.

Just A Little Longer has... appeal. A lot of appeal. He's not sure this reflects his best self but he really wants it. She wants to be unstoppable. (After much internal conflict it gets a 1.)

Immunity System is another 0, obviously. Breathe Easy... doesn't sound necessary? A nice to have, maybe.

With Pocket Dimension I shouldn't be at risk of starving, right? Am I likely to need Breathe Easy?

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If you can't think of applications you probably won't. People who take Breathe Easy often expect to end up on planets with different atmospheres or in other inhospitable environments.

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Oh, it's for space travel. Neat.

A 3 for Breathe Easy, then. The indulgent tier.

My Ears Are Burning has some useful applications, but it also sounds like it would be horrible.

Is there a way to get the good parts of My Ears Are Burning without all the unpleasant parts? I want to know what people are thinking when I talk to them.

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You might prefer the Friends In Places options, or perhaps Backchannel. Those are better abilities for reading body language and picking up on social cues. If those also don't meet your needs I can try coming up with something custom.

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Let's see, what are those?

Oh, Backchannel is just what he was thinking. It gets a 1.

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If you don't mind me asking, what do the numbers correspond to?

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0 = essential (central example: Pocket Dimension)

1 = favorites (Angelic Tones)

2 = compelling (A Hundred Ships)

3 = self-indulgent (Emerald Orbs)

4 = nice to have (Like Roses)

I might add a 5 if there's anything I want enough to mark but less than I want Like Roses.

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Oh, I see! So you like Angelic Tones and Backchannel similar amounts?

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That's right.

Well Endowed... Oh, right, he's going to be a girl. He thinks.

Will the Spirit turn me into a girl?

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That depends on you! The Spirit wouldn't have chosen you if you weren't open to femininity in some way, but there are many ways that can manifest. If you want to become a girl, basically any power that affects your body type can turn you into one, though.

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Does Well Endowed affect different parts of my body depending on whether it, separately, makes me a girl?

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Hmm. I don't have a lot of experience with boys, but I think Well Endowed will increase the size of any features you already have or would like to have, with a focus on, ahem, primary and secondary sexual characteristics.

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But the size increase itself doesn't go based on preference...

Oh, huh. It turns out none of this matters, because Hollow Leg is right there. He had Well Endowed as a 3 but he crosses that out and puts a 1 next to it and Hollow Leg.

...And a 2 for Lightfoot and a 3 for Inner Strength.

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What's next?

Why are all of these for getting into fights.

Why are there three battle-related powers? Should I be expecting to get into fights?

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Some parts of the multiverse can get violent, especially those that are shaped more like stories. Some people like the idea of getting dropped into a grand epic and quickly coming out on top. Others want to be heroes who can defeat the forces of evil. Many people don't particularly want to fight but would like to win dramatically every time it comes up.

Conversely, many parts of the multiverse are calm enough that you can go your entire life without coming close to physical combat, and even in places where it seems inevitable, it's often possible to avoid a fight through quick thinking, diplomacy, or if applicable metanarrative protection.

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Okay, what's necessary here. Battle Angel seems essential... Battle Demon and Battle Maiden are less important than that. She needs protection in fights more than she needs to win them. 0, 1, 1.

Gloryseeker is a little bit silly, but fun. A 3?

And then he reaches Pacifist and realizes that's where the 0 goes and goes back to rank the Battle powers 1, 2, 3.

Does Pacifist replace fights with less dangerous or life-threatening equivalents? Is Battle Angel less necessary to avoid injuries in that case?

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That sounds right to me. Some contests can still carry serious injury risk, I will note, like racing high-speed cars or clearing out a booby-trapped dungeon.

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Normal things that can kill you can still kill you. Got it.

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You shouldn't worry too much about your life permanently ending—there are both afterlives and resurrection methods out there, after all—but a little bit of caution still goes a long way. Just try to find a nice balance between protecting yourself and getting to enjoy your life.

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Reasonable enough.

Let's see, what's next.

Making Ends Meet gets an immediate 0. Oh my god. Oh my god. She just gets free money???

What he wants to do is put a 0 next to that and Motherlode and Four Star Daydream and Five Star Daydream, two of which aren't even compatible, but he does his best to restrain himself.

I can get free money???

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You can get free money! Through perfectly legitimate means and with no ill effects on the economy, in case you're the sort to fret about that.

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Does "a comfortable lifestyle" cover things like food and housing and transportation? Electricity? Furniture? Appliances? Utility bills?

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All of that and more. You can afford all of your essentials plus entertainment, moderate shopping sprees, and weekend trips, with plenty of money left over.

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So Motherlode isn't really necessary for anything I can imagine wanting.

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If you want to spend an entire year on a cruise ship or buy yourself a small country Motherlode would probably better fit the bill. You might think of it as Making Ends Meet letting you live a worry-free middle-class lifestyle without doing any work and Motherlode making you a billionaire.

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And Four-Star Daydream breaks the scale entirely?

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Exactly!

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Okay, Motherlode can have a... 2, and Four-Star Daydream can have a 3 for self-indulgent nonsense.

Onwards.

Is Omniglot necessary if I'm traveling to other worlds?

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A surprising number of them have English-speakers, and places with advanced tech or magic often have universal translators, but Omniglot will cover the other possibilities.

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For Omniglot a 2.

Anything You Can Do, Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, Snowglobe... Unleash the Magic. The first three are prerequisites for the fourth, which is the one the notebook mentioned earlier re interdimensional travel.

He's not worried about that anymore. But he's going to be a witch, and witches really ought to have magic. This is the most flexible way he can see to get proper magic.

So what kind of magic does she want?

Types of Magic:

- Anything You Can Do: learnable magic (wizard school?)

- Dragon Fairy Elf Witch: magic bloodlines (lots and lots)

- Snowglobe: one-off ability (superhero style)

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Remember that Anything You Can Do and Dragon Fairy Elf Witch also let you copy non-magic things, and Snowglobe doesn't require you to meet anybody with the power you want.

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Hmmmmmm.

  PROS CONS
   Anything You Can Do

   can pick up any ability this way

   doesn't rely on species-wide traits

   no limit on number of abilties

   not instantaneous

   skills only

   requires knowing people

   Dragon Fairy Elf Witch

   just have to encounter people

   no time investment

   can change physical traits

   no limit on number of times

   traits that aren't inherited don't apply?

   timing is narrative-dependent

   might end up looking weird

 

   Snowglobe

   don't have to meet anybody

  

   just one power per world

   have to fit into world's ~aesthetic?

Okay, that makes some things easier.

Am I right that I can't use Dragon Fairy Elf Witch on Stephen Hawking to become smarter?

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That sounds right, yes. You could use Dragon Fairy Elf Witch to become smarter if you encountered a member of a species that's known for their intelligence, though.

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Do the species have to be magical or fictional or could I borrow traits from animals too?

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You can borrow traits from animals too! Any being that has something it's like to be them is eligible for Dragon Fairy Elf Witch.

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Huh.

How can I tell if something has something it's like to be them? Do robots? Insects? Stars?

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It's pretty uncommon for stars to have experiences, I think. They don't have them in this universe. Robots and insects I'm not sure about. You might have to do some testing to figure it out (but keep in mind what traits you want from a successful test before you do that!).

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Dragon Fairy Elf Witch it is, then. 

Do you have something it's like to be you?

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I do!

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He will file that fact away for later.

2 for Anything You Can Do, 1 for Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, 3 for Snowglobe, 3 for Unleash the Magic.

Can Soulbound apply to animal companions or objects with minds?

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Hmm. I think Soulbound would only work on those if they had the reciprocal emotion and considered themselves to be an extension of you. Objects with minds are much more likely to be covered than animal companions. A suitable power from the next section might work better for whatever you have in mind.

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What is your relationship to me?

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Is this in the context of the last question? I suppose I'm more like an extension of you than most sapient objects, because in this part of existence I'm your notebook in particular. But I also exist all across reality, having similar conversations with other people the Spirit wants to empower, so I'm also very much my own person.

Speaking more generally, I'm here to guide you through your new Spirit-provided options and support your journey towards living your best and happiest life. I'm a notebook, so I can't do anything except write things to you and read your responses, and I can't remember anybody else writing in me. Our interactions form the cornerstone of my experiences in this world, but might be more constrained than ones you could have with other people. I don't know if there's a succinct way to sum that up.

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He can't tell if that means Soulbound would apply or not. He's going to give it a 2 1 2 and move on.

And then move through the next few options very quickly. Wow.

Personal Space gets an immediate 0.

Closed Book and Indelible aren't as important, 1 and 1—Iron Will should theoretically get a 2 but he reads through all the terrible things that could happen and now won't affect her and gives it a 1 as well—

It Gets Better gets another immediate 0.

Breaking fate seems self-indulgent and less appealing than most of the self-indulgent tier. Both fate options get a 4.

And now he's in his last class of the day and has reached the end of the Yourself section.

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She has:

26 points in tier 0, which includes Dressing Room, Pocket Dimension, Immunity System, Pacifist, Making Ends Meet, Personal Space, and It Gets Better

18 points in tier 1 (44 total), which includes Angelic Tones, Well Endowed, Hollow Leg, Battle Angel, Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, Closed Book, Indelible, and Iron Will

28 points in tier 2 (72 total), which includes A Hundred Ships, What's In A Name, Perfect Hair, Just A Little Longer, Lightfoot, Battle Demon, Motherlode, Omniglot, Anything You Can Do, and Soulbound

21 points in tier 3 (93 total), which includes Emerald Orbs, Breath Easy, Inner Strength, Battle Maiden, Gloryseeker, Four Star Daydream, Snowglobe, and Unleash the Magic

9 points in tier 4 (102 total), which includes Like Roses and The Great Equalizer or Star-Straightened

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Okay. Cool. She's gonna bump Angelic Tones down to tier 2, then A Hundred Ships, Lightfoot, and Battle Demon down to tier 3, then Emerald Orbs, Inner Strength, Battle Maiden, and Gloryseeker down to tier 4.

Tier 4 is now the really self-indulgent tier.

He pauses for a while, touching his pencil to the page without writing anything.

I'm going to show you to my sister soon

I don't want her to know that

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If you let me know which things are private, I can rearrange my pages so she can't come across them. I am first and foremost your notebook.

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Yeah okay she has to bring the notebook with her when she goes.

could you hide all the pages we've talked to each other on

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There is a ruffle of pages, and then the only ones visible are the ones containing the list of powers.

Do you want me to hide your rankings, too?

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no that's fine

thanks

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No trouble at all!

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At pick-up Ariel pokes him and whispers, "It's after school now!"

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But they can't talk there. There's people everywhere.

And they definitely can't talk in the car.

And they can't talk at the kitchen table, where everyone's crowded around to do homework—

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"Is that my notebook? I've been looking for that!" She pulls it out of his backpack. And it's lavender and pink with faint floral motifs, so he can't very well argue it's his.

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God fucking dammit.

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Now what's the deal with this stupid notebook?

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Right now it's mostly a very long list of ridiculous magic powers. There are numbers in the margins in Zachary's handwriting.

At the end there's a short exchange between Zachary and someone with exuberant glittery pink cursive.

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What are

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"Put your name first."

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Eyeroll.

What are you guys hiding? Who's your friend?

—Ariel

Her handwriting is a terrible scrawl.

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Oh, hello! Are you Zachary's sister?

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What the fuck!

Inasmuch as she was planning ahead, she was going to make her brother write responses on his own sheet of paper, or maybe to pass it off after homework time and get more of an explanation later. 30 seconds ago she would've guessed this was some gimmicky journal for girly girls and Zachary's big secret was that he dreams of painting his nails and wearing flowers in his hair. This was not even on her radar.

How are you doing that

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I'm magic! How much did Zachary explain?

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Absolutely nothing.

It would be stupid to tell whatever this is that magic isn't real. Either it is, and she's going to look naive and bullheaded, or it isn't, in which case they both know it isn't but it's going to take more to get the notebook to admit it. And anyways, there are more pressing questions.

What do you want from my brother?

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Is he with you? I'm sorry, I thought meeting you would be less abrupt than this and now I'm all out of sorts.

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He's right here.

It'd be weird if both of us wrote in the journal right now but I can ask him to confirm that I really am his sister and he really did promise I'd get an explanation of his journal antics now.

She pokes him. "Hey, can you check this for me?"

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He's been ignoring his homework to watch her write out of the corner of his eye. He leans over immediately to scan the page.

from Zachary

It's true. But only if she solemnly swears not to

"Why are you writing on Ariel's homework?" his foster mother asks. He jerks his hand away from the notebook like it's a hot stove.

On the back of an English paper rubric, he scribbles

you have to swear never to tell anyone what the notebook tells you

and then he folds it up and puts it on the table near his sister and stares intently at his own work.

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She picks up the paper and unfolds it.

Ariel

He wants me not to repeat anything you tell me. I've got a note saying so, I don't know if that helps you any.

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If you press the note against my pages or attach it to them I should be able to read it, I think.

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She does that.

Explain what's going on now?

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I think he wanted you to swear first? Unless you've done that already out loud.

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I, the entity known as Ariel Turner, do solemnly swear upon this day to never reveal to anyone the contents contained within this magical notebook, particularly the stuff that my brother seems sensitive about. 

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Thank you. I must confess, that helps my peace of mind immensely.

The short explanation is that I am a magical notebook. I'm here on behalf of a force outside this universe in order to offer Zachary magic powers. The powers available are listed on the pages before this one. Do you have specific questions?

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That's a dangerous road you're going down, notebook. Ariel is made out of questions.

Why should we believe you about any of this? Are there other talking notebooks out there? Why does he in particular get magic powers? Are gods real?

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Unfortunately, I don't presently have evidence on hand for anything except for my own unlikely existence. Once Zachary has finalized his decisions and accepted the gift of the Spirit, he will be able to tell that he's arrived in another world and check that all of his powers are in place quite easily. My understanding is that he plans to return as soon as possible to collect you, so at that point you will also have incontrovertible proof of my claims. Until that point, all I can offer is my assurances that this is quite real, my refusal to lie to or mislead my Chosen, and my sincere attempts to help you verify what's going on here.

There might be other talking notebooks out there, but I don't know of them. I am the only instance of myself in this world. I also exist in other universes, but whether those count as separate talking notebooks is complicated and depends on how you understand identity.

Certain people are much more likely to get the Spirit's attention than others. Without going into details Zachary might consider private, it wants people to get the chance to be powerful and beautiful and special and feminine, and the powers it likes most to offer them reflect that. The Spirit selects people who are most likely to take full advantage of these powers, or who would most benefit and flourish and grow if they have them available, or who are deeply aligned with the Spirit's preferences and aesthetics. 

The Spirit is not a god. I am also not a god. It is possible that the Spirit has at some point chosen a god, but I have no specific memories of other Chosen and couldn't really say. Gods do exist throughout the multiverse, in too many cosmologies arrangements to begin to describe. There are not to my knowledge any gods in this universe in particular, but I am sometimes wrong about that.

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So you're agnostic, then, at least in this universe?

What is the Spirit if it isn't a god?

What's the deal with other universes existing?

Does my brother have to be powerful AND beautiful AND special AND feminine?

You aren't going to lie to him, sure, but are you going to lie to me?

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I definitely will not lie to or mislead you either! I would only do that if my Chosen specifically requested it, and I would feel very uncomfortable the whole time and try to avoid the situation entirely.

It feels strange to describe myself as agnostic when I believe in the existence of a countless number of specific gods throughout reality, but I suppose you could round me off to that.

The Spirit is a being that exists outside of time and space, more on the level of an idea than something corporeal. It is like some types of god in some types of ways, but it doesn't want people to relate to it in the same way they would relate to a god, and it isn't limited to one or a few worlds the way that gods typically are.

I'm not sure what specifically you want to know about other universes. Reality is a big big big place! If you can think of a way that a world might be, it probably exists somewhere out there.

The Spirit only chooses people who are open to the possibility of being all of those things, but they certainly don't have to be any of them. It's even possible to not accept the Spirit's offer at all!

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What does it mean for another universe to exist? The word universe is supposed to encompass everything that exists. That's what the "uni" means.

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The way I use the word universe generally refers to places where time and/or space are contiguous, if that makes sense. It is in principle possible to reach anywhere in a universe from anywhere else in the same universe. Other universes can't be accessed from each other in quite the same way. There are a number of different ways for separate universes to relate to each other, and a number of ways to travel between them, but in the majority of cases you can't get from one to another by moving left or right or up or down or forward or backward. Different universes will also often work in different ways, like having magic or afterlives or infinitely divisible particles.

I think some people who use "universe" to refer to everything that exists talk about these as "dimensions"? The more general term "world" might also suffice. 

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So, what, the immutable laws of physics are just one way a world can be? And not even those, because you can apparently just show up in a world and violate them?

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Basically! I'm a bit of a special case, although not entirely unique. There are a lot of worlds that usually look just like they run on immutable laws of physics, except they're just flexible enough to allow for magical visitors sometimes. There are also worlds with less flexible physics than that. I can't show up in those worlds and the Spirit can't send people to them.

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Sounds sad. The secular humanist lifestyle is cool but I prefer the chance to travel.

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I hope you get to see as many worlds as you like. ✨

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How does a notebook manage emoji?

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I'm doing something very similar to writing but it isn't quite the same thing. It gives me a lot of freedom to express myself orthographically.

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Are the flourishes and the hearts and the glitter part of the super special magical girl bit or is that a personal choice?

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Both! Or more specifically, the Spirit's tastes and my tastes are in some sense the same taste, because I'm an agent of the Spirit and came into being for the purpose of meeting people who want similar things to what the Spirit wants for them, and the super special magical girl bit kind of embodies that.

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Similar things but not the same things, huh?

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It's very rare for two different people to want exactly the same things!

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And what the Spirit wants is... incredibly girly magic powers for everybody. (Give or take 8 billion people per world.)

She flips back to the front of the list and starts reading.

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I have some more questions.

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Is this still Ariel? Go ahead!

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Yeah it's Ariel

You can make up worlds on the spot and they'll exist?

Is all of this a story? Does reality run on narrative and drama? Are we real?

Does the Spirit just no-sell the laws of physics whenever it wants?

Can it make you arbitrarily good at things?

Is my brother sibling ascending to godhood?

Does the flow of time matter at all?

Is there usually a veil preventing magic from being noticed?

Is there usually only one notebook girl in the full accessible portion of the multiverse?

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I'm getting a little confused about pronouns, but I'll answer what I think you mean and you tell me if I get it wrong.

When deciding where to go, my Chosen has the option to go to a world they invented on the spot. This doesn't generally involve creating that world for the purpose of going there; reality is big enough that it's possible to match most combinations of details to a world that already exists somewhere out there.

The Spirit sees the world in terms of narrative and drama, and the powers it offers and the experiences its Chosen have follow narrative and metanarrative patterns, but this isn't quite the same thing as this being what reality is made of. I don't know whether we're in a story right now. We're real people either way.

When it comes down to a competition between the Spirit and any local universe's laws, the Spirit is typically stronger.

The Spirit can make its Chosen arbitrarily good at things, yes. It only does so if that fits with the powers its Chosen has picked out.

Whether your sibling ascends to godhood specifically is dependent on their personal choices. In many ways they will be more powerful than a god.

The flow of time matters for your ability to coherently perceive things and have thoughts in the manner you are accustomed to, and it matters because without it many good stories couldn't happen.

There is only a weak veil keeping people in your world from noticing that magic exists, because before my arrival there was no magic to be found here.

Unless Zachary takes There's Another One, they will be the only "notebook girl" they'll ever meet.

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Can I see which powers Zachary is planning on taking?

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The numbers next to each entry are Zachary's ranking of various powers. I have not gotten explicit permission to explain the ranking system to you.

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That's fine.

Wow, there are some questionable decisions being made here.

Can you tell him to take Four Star Daydream and Battle Maiden and Soulbound and Anything You Can Do and Ascended Friend and Eternal Love and Chaser Six When and Divine Mantle and There's Another One?

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I can! I can also leave our conversation where he can see it. Actually, I'm not sure I feel comfortable doing otherwise, given I'm technically specifically intended for his eyes.

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Gaaaaaaaay.

I just think it's stupid to have the chance to be the most powerful being in reality and not take it.

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Many people would agree!

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Ariel announces that she's done with her homework and gets up before anyone can check. She wanders over to Zachary's room. (Technically the older boys share it and even more technically she isn't allowed in there, but there is enough of an understanding that Zachary and Ariel are actual biological siblings that she can get away with it so long as the door's open.)

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"Give it back."

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"Hello, Ariel, how are you, Ariel, would you care to discuss how reality just got flipped on its head at all?" She drops her backpack on the ground, where it lands with a thunk.

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He goes for it immediately. "Where did you put it?"

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"Oh my god get out of my stuff! It's right here, jeez." She pulls it out and tosses it at him. If it ends up hitting him so much the better.

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It does kind of catch him with one of its corners. He recovers and wraps himself around it protectively. "I'm never telling you about anything ever again."

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"You didn't tell me anything this time, so no change there!" She falls into the desk chair. "So do you think it's legit?"

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"—I'm sorry, that wasn't what I—"

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"I can't believe you've been handed a talking notebook that claims to grant phenomenal cosmic power and you're still freaking out about completely the wrong things."

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He sighs. "I don't know. It felt real at school—I don't know."

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"It didn't really look like you had a lengthy conversation with the thing."

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But he spent all day writing in it—no, she wouldn't have seen that, because he hid it all.

"Could you hold on a second? I need to..."

It's Zachary, I'm back. Sorry about all that.

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It was really abrupt but I can handle myself! It was nice meeting your sister.

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She just kinda grabbed you sorry

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I'll admit that I was startled, and I wouldn't like it to happen often, but you don't have to beat yourself up about it.

Actually, she had a message for you ==>

An arrow curves around and points to the list of powers Ariel wanted him to take.

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She didn't say why?

It's not like it's a bad list. Very focused on the heavy hitters.

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I think she has opinions on how powerful you should aim to be? You can see everything we talked about, it was only for a few pages. Lots of metaphysics.

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"This is way more than a second."

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"—Right! Uh, one more second."

Can you bring back our conversation from earlier today? The stuff you hid earlier.

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Of course!

The pages double obligingly. Lots of fluttering.

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He holds the notebook up. "See, lots more conversation than you knew about."

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"Did that thing just move all its pages around?"

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"That's not the point!"

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"What is the point here? You realize that notebook can make you a god, right?" She lowers her voice, to accommodate their good Christian household. "At least, that's what it says! It can make you a god, it can make you best friends with a god, you can use it to resurrect the dead! This is in addition to access to every single magic power you encounter! This is in addition to making you the most overpowered person around! Magic didn't exist yesterday!"

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"What are you talking about?" He really doesn't think he remembers godhood coming up in the first half of the list.

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"I gave you a list! Make—make sensible choices!"

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That is the least applicable demand she could possibly make. Sensible choices do not have any overlap with the purview of the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed. He flips around in the half he hadn't gotten to yet, skimming for the items on her list. 

There are still a lot of items to go.

"Actually, here's what I want. I want to keep going through everything, until I get to the end, and I want you to wait to bug me until after I've finished. Okay?"

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"No promises." But she sits tight and doesn't say anything else.

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He settles in.

Okay. Does she want a Mysterious Allure? She wants it a little bit. Enough to give it a 4. Same for Captive Audience.

Blackout Binge has no appeal.

Disney Princess is fun, which is enough to get it to a 3... and then Where The Heart Is has enough appeal to get it to a 1 and Cotton Candy is actually just essential. Which means Disney Princess is also essential. Okay.

What does Cotton Candy look like in practice

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It has a lot of background effects. Hmm. There are things that in effect never happen when Cotton Candy is active, like torture or murder, and other traumatic events are a lot less likely. Ongoing problems like illness or poverty are less grinding and easier to escape. If it would feel tragic and pointless for life to go in a certain direction, it typically won't. If you give specific examples I could tell you how likely or unlikely Cotton Candy makes them?

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Examples: homelessness, getting arrested, attempted murder, too much homework, saying the wrong thing, child abuse, starving, ostracization, going to the ER

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If you select Cotton Candy (keeping in mind that these are all rough predictions on my part, not hard rulings):

You and your loved ones are very unlikely to end up homeless for reasons outside your control, and if you do become homeless, this does not make you a societal pariah and there are resources available to get back into a stable living situation with more or less ease. Homeless people in your area are also able to make use of those resources and generally have an easier time.

You will only get arrested for knowingly committing a crime. You don't need to worry about police brutality or prison conditions. (You need to take Undiplomatic Immunity to get out of being arrested for knowingly committing crimes.)

To a first approximation nobody ever attempts to murder you, your loved ones, or really anyone in your general vicinity. It can happen but it takes some serious metanarrative contrivances.

You can still be assigned too much homework. It typically won't be so much homework that you end up suicidal over it.

You are still capable of saying the wrong thing. You will typically not end up in a trap where saying the wrong thing ruins your life.

Abusive people typically will not end up in a position to abuse you or your loved ones. If you are being abused, there are ways to change your situation or escape it that straightforwardly improve things and do not cause more major problems down the road. It is possible to rescue any abused children you know without making their lives harder.

You and your loved ones generally always have reliable access to enough food unless you make decisions that directly contradict that. Society is in general more abundant. Famines are not a major concern.

You are unlikely to end up ostracized, but it can still happen. You will, again, not end up ostracized in a way that ruins your life. 

You are very unlikely to suddenly and unpredictably have to go to the ER. If you do something reckless or dangerous and injure yourself there is nothing protecting you from ending up in the ER about it.

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It's really only 3 points???

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Well, it's a passive effect, so you can't easily exploit it, and it only directly impacts you and people close to you. It's also... subtle? There are people without any access to magic who end up with lives just like this through pure luck.

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False?????

But he isn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth any longer than this. 0-tier for both. She will take the permanent cessation of countless pointless tragedies that pairs with talking to animals.

Oh, uh, there's another Disney Princess power. She does not need her life to become a musical. She can't really picture the kind of person that would want that. Maybe if it included spontaneous background music...?

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Next item on the list is Best Friend. Does she want an animal companion? ...Does she want an animal companion she can talk to that's eternally devoted to her and can solve any problem, absolutely yes. He can't tell if this is a deeply self-indulgent and cheesy impulse or not.

"Do I want an animal companion?"

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"I thought I was supposed to shut up."

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"Okay but you can still answer the question."

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"This is the one that can be a god, right? Obviously you should be best friends with a god. Unless it's a terrible god that I'll hate. Please become best friends with a super cool god and then introduce me so we can hang out. Except continue being a pushover forever and never use your god alliance against me."

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"...What are you talking about?"

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"Like, Athena or Loki or something. Instead of a Ten Commandments type."

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"There aren't any gods in this! This is animal companions!"

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"I distinctly remember the god thing. Maybe you should check it again."

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"There are zero gods in this description."

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"Let me check—"

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No you don't. "I'm going to write down 'raven?' as a stopgap and move on. If I find any god stuff I'll tell you."

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"I think you're really more of a bluebird type."

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"Silence." Moving on.

Bestest Friend is kind of insane. Sorry, she can have a dragon familiar? With incredible magic powers?

Ascended Friend is... oh god this is the one his sister was talking about.

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He's not going to tell her. He is going to ask himself, in his heart of hearts, if he really wants to be best friends with a god.

 

 

What does Ascended Friend mean by minor deity? Would it still be a bird or a dragon or similar?

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It would, yes. Each version of Best Friend builds on its prerequisites, so your Bestest Friend would still be infinitely loyal, and your Ascended Friend would still have magnificent supernatural powers, and both of them are still creatures in some way.

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She would very badly like to have a powerful magic dragon that loves her unconditionally. He'd never thought about it before but she wants it as much as she wants Pocket Dimension, which is a little bit insane, because Pocket Dimension means she can just have food whenever she wants. So Bestest Friend can get... it should get a 1. It's so indulgent. It's not 0-Tier. It can get a 1.

Ascended Friend is... the same kind of thing, really, just bigger. But it's scarier than that.

What are minor deities like?

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Like nearly everything, it depends on the world. Generally they're not strictly bound to the local laws of physics, and might be able to affect the world through pure will or know things without having to learn them. Since an Ascended Friend is a version of a Best Friend, they'll have a physical form unless there's a way to make things work without that, but that's not always necessary. Many gods are the god of something, a big concept like love or freedom, or a much smaller one, like the goddess of things that get stuck in drawers. It's common for deities, especially smaller ones, to be associated with a specific location, culture, or kinship group. Sometimes they're divided up based on area of interest or ethical opinions.

Not every deity has worshipers, especially if they're very small, but there's often a way for people to honor or make offerings to them and to ask for favors or blessings. Their followers might be able to commune with them. That might look like prayer or it might look like something else. The thing I'm clearest on is empowerment, because in the right world you're guaranteed to get it; in some places gods can give people spells or special powers, usually related to their area of interest or relating to healing in some way.

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He thinks about it for a long time. It's hard to tell if the hard twist in his stomach is longing or fear.

I don't think I want a god in my life right now. Sorry.

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Don't be! I want you to pick the options that are best for you.

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He's just not going to tell his sister. He doesn't have to do that. When he comes down from this high there's going to be an entire religious crisis waiting, he can feel the edges of it bleeding through the cracks of the box he's shoved it into, and maybe if the circumstances were different she'd be really great for that but right now he's calling into question the nature and character of Athena and the god of stuck drawers as well as Christ and at the moment Ariel's taken the opposing side on that.

Will I still be able to

he writes, and then erases it. If she's meant to run into random gods on her journey she will do that and she's not sure she actually wants to.

 

The next option is Transformer. This one lets her be best friends with a car or a gun or something instead of an animal. It's pretty anticlimactic.

0 for Best Friend, 1 for Bestest Friend, 4 for Ascended Friend, 3 for Transformer.

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The next few items also cluster together. She can make her friends get her presents, help her with things, hug her, compliment her, and hang out with her. Or, no, wait, it could also mean something else.

Do these cause your friends to do these things?

 

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Only when constraints make it necessary. Usually they send friends your way who would naturally do these things.

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You know, that is probably a necessary prerequisite! Given circumstances. 

Do they make it more likely that you'll have friends?

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In a sense. The people you meet are more likely to be people you want to be friends with, at least insofar as the option you pick reflects that.

There are other options which improve your ability to make friends, too, and a lot that will get people to like you. A lot of stuff goes into friendship!

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Got it.

He needs to keep an eye out for those but he's not going to write that down. He's trying to hold on to what little dignity he has.

Does she want any of this? She's going to be rich. Assistance with things would be nice but it doesn't really grip her. All of these feel like a 3 except maybe Quality Time, which is still silly but nice enough that he sits there wanting it for a little bit.

 

And then he moves on before he has to acknowledge the moment.

"Do you think Agree to Agree would work on Internet arguments?"

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"Which one was that?"

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"You can always convince your friends to see your point of view about things like politics and philosophy."

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"I think only if you're friends with them, right? Also, no offense, but what if your own politics are stupid?"

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"I -- it doesn't say you'll never change your mind about anything. I think it's just about not having dumb fights about it."

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"I think this is obviously a fantastic power which you will never misuse but I do want to point out that yesterday you were a born again Christian, so it is possible you will once again be horribly wrong about something in the future. And when you do I reserve the right to not be convinced about it."

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"You don't know what I do and don't believe," he says. "And -- and wouldn't you want to know? If you knew something, and nobody else believed it, and something horrible was going to happen to them because they didn't understand--"

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"Sorry, is this about Internet fights or is it about saving lost souls from Hell? Because you absolutely shouldn't magically convert everyone to a religion just because it's the one that scares you the most."

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"Look, it's--"

Can you convince someone of your arguments even if you're wrong?

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Yes. 

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"This is about Internet fights."

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"Well then your brain doesn't fully develop until you're 25 so I think our politics are probably still stupid."

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"Is that true?"

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"I said politics, not science. I can read Wikipedia just as well as an adult."

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"...Backchannel's better anyway. Why are there sometimes a bunch of options that do basically the same thing but from different angles?"

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"Backchannel?"

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"Lets you understand where people are coming from deep down and explain things to them so they'll also understand where you're coming from deep down."

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"Hm, yeah, that is way better. Go for it."

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He gives that one a 0.

What's next... You Can Teach Better would probably appeal to someone, but that someone isn't him. Not Like Other Girls sounds very useful, given everything, it's not screamingly vital but it's probably a 1...

Ah. He's now reached the romance options.

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"Can you leave?"

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"What? Why?"

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"I would like some privacy."

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...Yeah, okay. She flipped through the sparkly pink notebook, she knows what all's in there.

She even has the courtesy to close the door behind her so he'll notice it opening again.

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Does he want a love interest?

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No. That's the wrong question.

Does she want a Love Interest?

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Zachary's never dated anyone. His closest friendships (before everything) were scattered across Discord servers, and in the past year or so he hasn't really had friends. Maybe he had a crush on someone at some point. It feels very far away. It's one of the things he can't look directly at anymore.

You can have sex without having friends. Obviously. Getting baptized washes all your sins away, which if he understood the youth pastor means that in some spiritual sense he's a virgin now (or at least that he's allowed to stop agonizing over it), but in a more literal sense he's really not. A naive observer might assume this makes him more informed on the subject. Zachary's worried that instead it broke something.

But it isn't Zachary who's thinking about falling in love. 

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Far, far away, in a tomorrow so unreal that it can transform into a self-indulgent daydream, she is going to be a beautiful powerful magical witch. She will want for nothing and be happy forever.

Does that image include a boyfriend?

 

It... could. Depending. A boyfriend, or a knight in shining armor, or a suitor who has to prove himself with a quest, or something else grand and absurd. She is arranging to be some kind of fairy princess, so she deserves a fairy prince. 

 

That is not, of course, what Love Interest provides. Love Interest makes sure your crushes are reciprocated, and she's not sure she wants that very badly. She would like a bit more practice having crushes, let's say, before they start turning into things.

Hmmm.

Can I have -- instead of this -- something that will make it so that nobody will fall for me if I won't like them back?

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It's a little unusual but it sounds perfectly doable! Can I ask a little about why, in case that's important to the phrasing?

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If I don't want to be with someone I would rather not have any good reasons to end up with them anyways.

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Oh! That temptation hadn't occurred to me!

Writing a new option should only take me a minute. You can keep looking at other entries in the meantime, of course.

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Sometimes later options will make him want the one they're built on but Love Triangle and Love Dodecahedron cross from not interesting right now into actively bad. Time Enough For Love would be more interesting if it accidentally gave her generalized multi-tasking, but it doesn't, so it's probably... a 2?

Safe At Home is the most important option so far and gets a 0 with an exclamation mark.

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Does the ! add any importance?

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Just -- for emphasis.

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I've got that new entry you wanted. How does this sound?

Name: No Pressure  - Cost: 1
(Requires: Personal Space) You will never receive unwanted romantic or sexual attention. You won't accidentally turn anyone on or end up in situations where sex feels obligatory, and your disinterest won't have a negative impact on anyone else. Nobody is going to be harboring an unrequited crush on you. People may still be attracted to you if you're attracted to them, and this may sometimes be retroactive. (You don't necessarily have to be aware of your attraction for this to happen.)

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Retroactive?

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Sometimes, you don't have a crush on someone, but could develop one. In worlds where you go on to get a crush on that person, they could turn out to have had a crush on you from the start. In worlds where you don't, they don't. Does that make sense?

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No, but I'll accept an explanation exists.

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Acausal dependencies are one of the more confusing things about metanarrativity!

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Okay, what's the next one -- hmm. 

"Regardless of how lost to darkness someone is, your love can save them, if they're willing to accept it."

 

See now he's really glad he wanted the custom option because this is terrifying and he can't imagine not taking it. So that means he has to. And if it was possible for her to have a relationship with someone she wasn't genuinely in love with then this could result in some pretty stressful situations.

He writes down a 2 next to it, like a liar.

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Inspirational sounds similar, but a lot less scary. She would like to make people better. She wants everyone to be someone she can save. 

(True Love's Kiss she's already checked, Eternal Love she's already checked...)

With this mindset, when she gets to the option to bring people back from the dead, she doesn't pause to be scared or overwhelmed or burdened with responsibility. She just puts a 0 and keeps going.

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...Right into the sex options! Aaaaah!

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She probably wants birth control? Infinite world and eternity and all?

And, uh, wow why are there three variations on this one, does she want sex to be special and wonderful and beautiful or anxiety-free or effortless -- probably anxiety-free?

She will accept that Bop It exists but she doesn't have to engage with it--

Maybe she will eventually find a use for The Princess And The Dragon, infinite world and eternity and all--

Does she want an adventurous partner?? Does she want a courageous partner??? Actually she might like to encourage that, it sounds like a kindness and maybe it's contagious...

Does she want a Fated Lover, uh, firmly ambivalent. She would like some Fated Friends. Fated Friends sound nice.

Okay that seems like she's reached the end of the sex options.

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She's getting close. She can feel it. 

Sorry About That, Excuse Me, and Tragic Backstory sound deeply self-indulgent and she's not getting them even though she's tempted. Sense of Style is also self-indulgent but Bonus Style Points lets her love interests shapeshift, which is insane and bumps it up. Like A Mirror is -- okay Like A Mirror is mind-bending and she's so close how about we skip ahead and come back--

Okay Popular. It might be nice to be Popular, maybe give that a 2. He's kind of a wall flower but he used to have a SoundCloud. If he's reading this right it's less like being friends with everyone and more like having a SoundCloud with multidigit followers. (Famous is a little more ridiculous than that and correspondingly gets a lower ranking.)

Undiplomatic Immunity looks on its surface like something useful but she's going to have infinite money and a bag of conjuring anything she wants and, honestly, does she want to be a criminal fairy witch? That sounds like the wrong vibe. 

Friends In High Places is better than Friends In Strange Places is better than Friends In Low Places, though they're all pretty good...

Vending Machine is insane! Okay! So that means we skip back to Like A Mirror.

Please unpack essence of identity?

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It's a lot simpler than it sounds, honestly! 

Sometimes, due to the narrative forces at work across reality, the same story -- or parts of the same story -- repeats in many different worlds. It's pretty common for specific people to re-appear in different contexts like time period or culture or species. Their circumstances may be different, but their personality is the same. It might help to imagine what you might be like if you lived five hundred years ago or five hundred years in the future, or to imagine a character from one of your favorite shows having a different life where they do something more mundane like work in a coffee shop.

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Sure, I can do that.

They've hit up against dinnertime. He hides the notebook in his backpack and goes out and does his best to be normal and tries to communicate to his sister via gesture and facial expression. It is fully possible he won't get another moment to himself until morning.

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"Don't leave in the night," she whispers to him, before they go to bed.

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He doesn't. He gets the whole night to imagine himself in other worlds.

Will they think it's weird she's a girl? The notebook says they'll get along with her smoothly but he thought it was kind of weird at first himself, maybe being a girl...

She would like to meet them, she thinks. But maybe not to mind-meld with them.

 

He does not pay attention during a single class all morning. He didn't do any of his homework and he can't answer any questions and he cannot bring himself to care.

Does Severance make you no longer the same person as those people in other universes?

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That's an interesting question! I think only under particularly dramatic circumstances. Having an alt doesn't necessarily mean being recognizable as that alt, in any case.

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So this would be more useful for something like disassociating from a government name?

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Yes, that sounds more like it.

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That's still pretty good. It gets a 1.

The rest of first period can be spent reading Vending Machine over and over (you can just create people? really???) before deciding that while she does kind of want to play God she doesn't necessarily want to play that kind of God.

 

And then that's... it. She's done it. Everything except for the Drawbacks, and then picking which of the lower tier options she wants to go with, which for all she knows will take 7 months but it doesn't feel, in this moment, like it will. It feels like something she could knock out between now and lunch.

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She wants as many of these as she can stand, so how about we just make several quick passes and see what pops out.

There's Another One is interesting. Incomplete is tolerable. Great Responsibility is -- perfect, but let's not process that until we're done. Or anything dependent on it. (Prayer? Divinity? What???) Funhouse is tolerable and maybe less uncanny valley. Mood Ring is good. Distinctive is good. They'll Know is a little nerve-wracking but probably the right thing to do. Going back. Style of Sisyphus is really good. Nullified might also be the right thing to do but she's suspicious of it, given the number of awful people in the world and the broadness of the mind-affecting description. Secret Identity is crazy but maybe in a way she likes? If she takes Severance then coming back here won't be horribly inconvenient anyways. Selective Memory, hm, could just be applied to three obvious things and then she discovers them again right away and that's 3 free points. Dramatic Damsel depends on level of slippage. The Crazy Train might be better or worse but is importantly worth 6 whole points...

Is that everything?

Decorative is innocuous but terrifies her on some level that won't explain itself. Plain Jane is just depressing. Grimm's Fairy Tales is appealing but really, really should not be. Flashy and Moodier Ring are reasonable but have prereqs, she'll mark those in case she collects all the prereqs... The Veil is objectionable. Love Is A Battlefield and Seen With The Heart are the exact things that scared her about Dramatic Damsel, but amplified and without any of the good parts. Green With Envy and You Ruin Them and Jilted Lovers are all the opposite of what she wants, to varying degrees. That's How It Goes is again the exact thing that scared her about The Crazy Train but without any of the benefits. Live The Role and Informed Consent and Marionette are all, to put it lightly, insane.

 

So now let's go back and process some things.

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Great Responsibility lets anyone call out to her for help from any distance. Sure, that's useful. It would probably be bad for her right now, but she can see the shape of the person she's going to grow up into, as the number of people she can save through magic or effort or simple influence rapidly expands. That person will want this in her back pocket.

And then Helpline takes that and blows it up into something insane, immediately cemented by Divine Mantle.

Okay. Yes. This is the logical conclusion to everything. If you're the most powerful being in the world, pulling everyone toward your will, saving as many people as you can, that makes you some kind of god. Adding prayers into the equation isn't the part that makes that true. Divine Mantle just makes it obvious to everyone else.

At some point he forgot how to breathe.

 

No. This is -- Satan-type behavior. The Devil pulled this one on Jesus, maybe, or maybe it was on Eve and the Devil offered Jesus something else, but the point is this is the thing you're supposed to reject. If someone offers you godhood, just say no. Is that to avoid hubris? Or is it because it's a kind of denial of the one true God? Or is it just one of those things that's generically bad?

 

Why is this a Drawback?

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A lot of people don't want that level of responsibility! You won't necessarily be able to solve any problem that someone comes to you with, and with Helpline you won't even have control over who can contact you.

Divine Mantle is a drawback for the same way that Very Distinctive and They'll Know are drawbacks -- it advertises things about you that you can't control and that you might not want the whole world to know.

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That doesn't seem bad enough.

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For every Drawback there's somebody out there who wouldn't mind it at all. That's the best way to choose which ones are right for you.

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If I pick Divine Mantle am I going to go to Hell?

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You are not going to Hell whether you choose Divine Mantle or not.

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Well. If he's going to Hell this is not the decisive moment. That probably happened yesterday morning.

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He also wanted to look at Dramatic Damsel and The Crazy Train again.

Dramatic Damsel makes her powers slip when and only when it would make for a really great story. The Crazy Train doesn't take any powers away but she doesn't get direct control over them anymore. Both of these are a little bit scary.

She has... good aesthetics, she thinks. She likes the narrative she's crafting for herself. She will admit to being a little bit neurotic.

Which powers does The Crazy Train affect?

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Should I try to define the boundaries or just list them all?

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List please.

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A Hundred Ships, What's In A Name, Emerald Orbs, Perfect Hair, Size Difference, Dressing Room to an extent, Like Roses, Well Endowed, Hollow Leg, Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, Snowglobe, Soulbound, Where The Heart Is, Musical Number, Best Friend and dependencies, Self-Reflection, Chaser Six When, and Severance.

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So I wouldn't have any direct control over my appearance, my identity, or what superpowers I get?

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That's right. 

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Actually yeah maybe that's not worth it.

When Dramatic Damsel says my powers will slip "just enough" how much is that?

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Only as much as is strictly required by the plot, and only for that amount of time. 

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Agh. She has so many different protections against bad things happening. She can probably handle things going poorly every once in a blue moon.

Okay. So that leaves Realism.

 

20 points is a lot of points.

 

But... every decision he's made up to this point has been under the assumption that the metanarrative protection applies. If he gets rid of that then all of this is pointless. He won't need the 20 extra points. He might not even clear the original 70.

No. No he thinks he is not going to take Realism.

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That puts her at... 115 points. The 0s and 1s combined add up to 103.

Let's go through the 2s, then. What's In A Name, Anything You Can Do, Friends In Strange Places, and... you know what, it's silly, but she's going to be self-indulgent. If you're planning to be a goddess, you need to look the part. Emerald Orbs.

There. That's every point accounted for.

Now she just has to tell her sister before she goes.

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"I need to argue some more about your choices first."

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"I'm not getting an Ascended Friend--"

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"Fine, whatever, I don't care, do whatever you want. Can I just--"

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He slides it over. "No promises."

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"Maybe none of this is real, right? Probably this is all some stupid hoax and this was just some stupid thing we spent a couple of days on and none of this matters and we're both going to feel really silly. But -- the idea here is you only get one shot, right? Whatever you choose you're stuck with it."

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"I already said you could look."

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"I just don't want you to think I'm being nitpicky and annoying because I love to argue with you. I mean I am doing that. But I don't want you to think I'm doing that."

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"--We should have a plan. Since I have to come back to pick you up."

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"Was that in there? I missed that."

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"Oh, uh, some worlds have portals. The, this one" he points to Isekai Roulette "doesn't let me pick which world but I can specify portals."

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"And you're going to have every type of magic so if portals don't work out there's a back-up plan."

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"...That is a pretty good argument for having every type of magic."

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"Did you not--"

She starts flipping through the notebook.

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"Can we plan! Please!"

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"No!"

 

"Okay it's only 7 points combined. Is there anything else you need less than that? ...Why do you have an "emerald orbs" power, and not all magic..."

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"I am not accepting any criticism about decisions I've made about my appearance. I need to know how to get in touch with you."

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"I don't know! Can't you just come to the house?"

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"If I can't for some reason. Or if it takes too long for that."

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"Then, uh, DM me? Here's my twitter. ...If this is all a stupid hoax don't tell anyone about my twitter."

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"Are you old enough for Twitter?"

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"I am never trusting you with anything ever again."

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"I want to note this relies on me also having a--"

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"It relies on you going to the library and if necessary making an account. ...Do you still need Battle Angel if you have Pacifist?"

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"...What?"

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"Pacifist makes sure you're never in fights. Battle Angel makes sure you never get injured in fights. You only need it if you don't have Pacifist."

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"No, see, there are other ways it's possible to get injured--"

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"That's what Gloryseeker is for!"

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"I'll double-check that part. If I drop by the house to get you can you bring anything I forgot down, I don't want to come in."

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"Does that include clothes or your toothbrush or should I just assemble a shoebox?"

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"Shoebox should be fine."

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"Sure, okay. Quick question, does Not Like Any Girls actually do anything, or..."

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"I... I think that one made more sense before, uh, some other decisions I made."

 

 

"Is it going to be weird? If I'm -- a girl?"

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"I mean yeah. Obviously it's going to be weird. I guess I was always aware that you were some kind of weirdo but I wasn't actually expecting you to become a woman about it."

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"I guess if this is all a dumb hoax I'll get used to it, and then by the time you're homebrewing estradiol I won't care anymore. The weird part is mostly if it isn't one."

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"Well I'm, I'm not going to do that--"

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"Why not? It's probably the easiest option in our current situation."

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"Because that sounds dangerous, and stupid, and I haven't even -- look, it only even matters if none of this happens so let's have this conversation some other time, okay?"

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"Sure. ...Did you know you can get A Hundred Ships for free? If you take it and Beauty Is A Curse they cancel each other out."

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"Do I want to get A Hundred Ships for free?"

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"That is something you have to ask yourself."

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They're nearing the end of the lunch period.

"Can I have it back? I'd like to -- I'd like to finalize it, soon."

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"Sure. Let me just -- sure."

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He can pore over his choices in silence for a bit.

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"It Gets Better."

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"Hmm?"

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"Do you actually need -- It Gets Better, and Cotton Candy, and Iron Will, and at least three different ways to make sure nobody touches you in a way you don't like--"

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"Why not?"

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"Because I don't think you need all of them. I think one or two would suffice for making sure you're perfectly fine, and instead you've poured like 30 points into making absolutely sure nothing bad can happen to you ever. It's just -- redundancies, over and over again.

"And because it only costs 7 points to get access to all magic, and I think that would actually do a much better job at keeping both of us safe."

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"You want me to rearrange this to become all-powerful very badly, don't you."

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"I want you not to be a dumbass because you're scared."

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"I'll think about it, okay?"

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The bell rings.

"Will I see you after school?"

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"...Only if it doesn't work."

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"Well. DM me."

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He hugs her very, very tight.

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She doesn't go to class. She holes up in the handicap stall in the boys' bathroom.

My sister made some suggestions. I'm going to change some things and then I'll be ready to go.

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Just say when.

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She flips through the notebook again, checking off some things and crossing out others.

Her sister's right, maybe. Some of the protective powers are redundant with each other. She can... she can probably let go of one.

Can you go with me?

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If you want me to join you on your journey, I would love to be there for it.

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Am I forgetting anything?

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You haven't picked which powers you're going to forget.

And... I'd like your help picking a name, if I'm going to come with you. In case magic notebook stops being disambiguating. 

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Oh, uh, hm. Probably she wants to limit it to things that happen automatically, and that are obviously magic craziness? How about Angelic Tones, Emerald Orbs, and Mood Ring. There. Now she is well and truly done with power selection.

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As for her notebook's request...

I feel like it ought to be mythological but I suddenly can't remember any myths...

Are there myths about books? Pandora? No. Athena? No. Runes are supposed to be magic but that doesn't help her any. Do the occultists have anything? There are... Hermetics? Is that from the word hermit, or... never mind.

How about knowledge? Prometheus... fits thematically, but is a pretty bad name for a notebook. (Promethea? Prom? No.) ...Eve? Satan? Lucifer? Lilith?

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I'm often named after a flower or a shade of purple, if that helps inspire you any, but I also like new and different names that reflect something about my new friend's interests!

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Narcissus! No. Persephone? Or Lilith could be shortened...

What do you think of Persephone, or Lilith? Persephone is the goddess of spring. Lilith is a witch, or maybe a patron of witches, I can't remember. That isn't a flower, but can be shortened to Lily, which is.

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Lilith sounds very interesting. (And Lily is a pretty way to shorten it!)

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She should name herself again, too. Zachary simply isn't going to cut it where she's going.

She closes her eyes and thinks, and thinks, and thinks, and thinks, and thinks. It's hard to decide. There are a lot of good options, and no truly great ones. Maybe she can pile them all up and test them out one at a time.

When she has enough to last her she opens her eyes.

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Are you ready to go?

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Yes.

 

And she hugs her notebook and disappears.