She winds up not attending most of the dances, but she does want to go to the end of year one, as she will be leaving Forks High School forever and it has some good points. Alice promised her a dress...
He's been working on his sewing; the materials are conjured, but the dress itself is the product of genuine physical labour. The fabric is light and floaty, black veined with silver; the design is sleek and minimal, not a stich wasted, with exactly enough room to move and just enough skirt to twirl.
And, because he can, he makes himself one, too. It's nothing like hers at all. Miles and miles of skirt swirling around his ankles, blood-red and unapologetically beautiful. He looks gorgeous in it.
She goes stag, she dances with everyone who passes within arm's reach, even Mike, because grudges are silly and he hasn't bothered her or Alice in months - and none of them are at all good at it, more's the pity.
Well, Alice is good at it.
[Wanna bet we can reduce the entire room to staring at us if we do something ridiculously ballroom to the upcoming techno music?] She snuck a look at the playlist.
And eventually the dance is over, and Bella changes back into her leathers.
But she keeps the dress. She likes it, and you never know when you're going to need a little black dress, shot through with silver like spindly frosted tree branches.
Bella's stepdad makes okay money, and Renée was so thrilled about Stanford that she insisted on buying Bella a round trip to Europe. Bella tells everyone that she plans to spend this trip "backpacking".
This means "flying".
She doesn't want to leave Tegu sitting in the airport parking lot for three months, so she leaves it in Charlie's garage and lets him drive her to the airport. She flies away. She fully expects Alice to follow her and leave his mom and Hilary to wonder where in the blazes he went off to.
His exact words to his mother are, "I'm gonna fuck off for a while, dunno when I'll be back, see you," while standing in the foyer with a backpack containing his favourite book and not much else. Since he never announces absences as short as a weekend, his mother correctly interprets this as meaning he will be gone at least several weeks, and hugs him. He hugs her back, walks out, and takes off as soon as he is out of sight.
Bella hits every country in Europe - why not? She can fly fast enough - and picks up languages as she goes. ("I was never anything special in Spanish class really, good but not great," she imagines saying, "but for some reason, put me in a country with native speakers and I can pick up anything...") She takes up a habit of sitting on top of high things. Like the Eiffel Tower. Or Mount Everest.
It's possible that Alice should be thinking about whether or not this means she is redefining their relationship somehow, and it's possible that if he were anyone else, he would be. But he is Alice, so he is thinking pretty much entirely about mountaintop makeouts and how much he loves Bella.
She decides some of that might be worth articulating. [Only have this much figured out,] she says. [In case you wonder, when you have more of your brain online,] she adds teasingly.
She learned Urdu on the way east, and she has not yet decided to risk traveling visibly in heavily Islamic countries anyway, but she zips around the city looking at things, playing hide-and-seek with Alice.
Bella has not yet killed the need for sleep - she's considered it, but she doesn't yet have quite enough things to do to fill the time. (She'll see if the novelty of making out with Alice wears off or not before declaring that to be "enough things to do".)
She finds a flat roof - of a business, not a house - and sprawls out, conjuring a mattress and a pillow half-consciously.
The next day she traverses Iraq and Syria and Turkey, and checks into a hostel in Greece.
At the end of the trip, when all the passengers disembark, many of them are met by locals or fellow travelers waiting at the docks. There is one nondescript Italian fellow standing a little apart from the rest, peering anxiously at everyone as they get off the boat, as though he is looking for someone he doesn't know well and isn't sure of recognizing.
[Damn,] says Alice, pulling up to hover beside Bella's window.
Well, the fact that they were able to get it started at all suggests that they have an idea of what's wrong, now. They'll either fix it, or determine that they can't fix it and have to send another locomotive to pull them out of the way of other trains, soon enough.
[I'm going to sleep,] Bella announces.
She has already been to France, so she goes through Spain on her way to Heathrow (a bus breaks on her, but it's on a densely traveled route so everyone can just cram into the next bus), and then she flies to Florida, where she will spend a week with her mom before popping up to Forks for one more week and then going to school.
[Yep,] Bella tells Alice.
Renée compliments Bella's outfit and remarks on the length of her hair (it's only about half an inch longer than the last time they saw each other, but Renée does this anyway) and chatters excitedly about all the things they need to do while Bella is here, including visiting Renée's favorite restaurants and seeing that one museum and making paper chains just like they did when Bella was six, for some reason.
"When does your friend want to come by?" Renée asks.
"I think our most recent plan was dinner tonight, but we can tweak it if that's not going to work for you." She echoes the conversation to Alice. [I just made that up - that work for you? We can have a more observable phone conversation to change the "plan" if you want.]
"Well, he can find it online if nothing else," Bella says.
"Then he should meet us there at six-thirty," Renée says.
"I'll call him," Bella says.
She goes through the motions of phoning and informing Alice of all this.
[I suppose if you're only going to set yourself on fire it's not a big deal. Just mind you aren't breathing normally at the time if it's more than a little burn - you don't want to pass out from smoke inhalation and catch on something and torch everything around you.]
And, notably, he does not want it to come with immunity to fire. That would just negate the entire purpose.
They all sit down and get menus. The prominently advertised special is a giant basket of deep fried shrimp. "So how did you two meet?"
"At school," Bella says. "We had gym class together."
"I'm so glad," enthuses Renée. "Now, I was thinking I would try to talk Bella into playing checkers or something, but I bet we have a game for three in the closet if you'd like to pick something out." She gestures at the closet that contains the board games.
There are various standards - Monopoly and Connect Four and a few decks of cards and checkers and chess and parcheesi and Apples to Apples. "Hmm," Renée says, peering around him. "Perhaps we don't have anything good for three after all. Unless you know a good card game for that many."
"That's also a card game, but not with normal cards," Renée says. "I suppose it could work with three, but it's really better with more... there are adjectives and nouns, and one person draws an adjective and the others play appropriate nouns and the person who played the adjective awards that card to whoever played the best noun."
No one is tracking scores, so they all have more cards than the defined limit when someone finally bothers to notice, but Bella has the most.
The next day is beastly hot - Bella isn't bothered, but she can sure tell - and so Renée takes her bathing suit shopping, buys her a red and blue flowered bikini, and drags her along to the beach! They set up a big beach towel to sit on and a big beach umbrella to sit under and apply sunscreen.
She flaunts, just a little, craning around to put sunscreen between her shoulderblades. Her mother might ask an uncomfortable question (probably only one, but still) if Alice appeared to help her with that.
Invisible swimming time! He ceases to breathe while he's underwater, just because it makes things easier. And if he doesn't interact with the surface, he can't make a noticeable splash.
...It occurs to him that it is dark and murky underwater, and that he is invisible anyway, and that Bella doesn't need to breathe.
[Wanna make out?] he asks. The fact that this is an acceptable question these days still gives him happy feelings, regardless of the answer to any given instance.
Bella and Renée spend all day at the beach, in and out of the water, and eat boardwalk food for lunch. Then they head home. [Mom wants to know if you want to join us for dinner again. She's cooking; she's doing risotto. She's better at food than my dad but not as good as me.]
[It's not really the same thing - spontaneous generation supposes that maggots just happen by themselves when meat is left around, and so on. People didn't catch flies laying eggs until later. Still, my curiosity has to have come from some combination of genetic and environmental factors - it's not like I have an immaterial soul or something.] Pause. [You don't believe in immaterial souls or anything, do you?]
[Not if they were magic pandas! But that's kind of my point,] he says. [I don't know that nobody else has wished for pandas on Pluto, and you don't either. The only way to actually find out would be to take a look at Pluto and check. If magic didn't exist I'd say there'd be no way a panda could've gotten to Pluto, but it does, so literally anything we can think of is possible because if we can think of it then so can somebody else and they might have a star.]
"Popsicles?" guesses Bella.
"Right in one," replies Renée, heading for the freezer. "I know Bella wants grape; what about you, Alice?"
"It should have occurred to me before that this would be the sort of thing that would appeal to you," she says, handing over the stack.
He reads The BFG, and thinks it is adorable.
He reads Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and thinks it is just as great as the movie was.
He reads James and the Giant Peach, and thinks it is fucking awesome.
He reads The Witches, and thinks it is amazingly twisted.
He reads Matilda.
He sits for a long time with his eyes closed and his arms wrapped around the book. Then he puts it carefully with the rest in his independently invisible backpack, climbs down to Bella's bedroom window, and knocks.
His thoughts and feelings are all over the place. He thinks Matilda is amazing. He thinks her parents are shitheads. There are ways in which her dad is familiar and ways in which he really isn't. He thinks that if he'd read that book when he was thirteen, his father would be dead by now. He doesn't know whether he wants to laugh or cry, but the second one definitely seems to be winning.
If he'd come to it earlier, before he'd had so much time to learn to be afraid... well, putting his dad in jail was never his first idea.
Bella contemplates this - that would certainly be awkward to explain to Renée, who is as likely as not to poke her head into the room at seven in the morning and offer waffles. Finally Bella triangles the alarm clock into setting itself to go off quietly at six-thirty - she's too tired to figure out the controls - and pulls him into the guest bed with her. [You'll have to skedaddle first thing in the morning.]
Bella closes the window lazily with a triangle and naps another half an hour.
And then Renée pokes her head in. And offers waffles.
Bella has hers with strawberries and whipped cream on it.
After one week in Jacksonville, Bella flies to Washington, finds Tegu in the parking lot, and zooms home to Charlie.
"Wasn't he out of town," Charlie says, "somewhere?"
"Yes," Bella says.
Charlie fixes her with a bit of a look. "Did that boy go to Europe with you, Bells?"
"Yeah. He didn't get a ticket on the same plane or anything, but he was in Europe at the same time and we went around together a lot," Bella says. Pause. "I think we might be sort of dating? A little? Not exactly? It's weird."
"Weird's right," mutters Charlie. "Er... I know you just spent a week with your mom... maybe she covered this..."
"Dad. Mom covered the birds and the bees years ago. I am fully informed," Bella says loudly.
Instead he is... having a remarkably similar conversation with Hilary, actually.
"So, you knew she'd be back."
"Mm," says Alice.
"You went to Europe with her."
"Mm," says Alice, and adds a shrug for good measure.
"Are you two...?" She makes a vague cyclic gesture with both hands.
"Screwing? Nope," says Alice.
"And that is simultaneously both more than I wanted to know and less than I asked. Congratulations."
"Heh," says Alice.
"I promise not to make you a grandfather until I am at least twenty-two and probably quite a bit older," Bella says.
Come to think of it, given the propensity of things to happen without her explicitly planning them... Pentagon proves able to suppressibly sterilize her. She can undo that at will, as with the regeneration, without even expending another wish. Splendid.
"That's good," Charlie says. "Not the only thing that can happen, though -"
"Dad. Do you desperately want to add this conversation to your life? Because I don't, and I promise it is not required for my well-being now or in the future, cross my heart."
"All right, Bells," Charlie says, after a long pause. "Let's go get some pie."
Tegu is a one-person vehicle; they take the cruiser.
And with that he leaves to catch up with his daughter and drive her home.
He doesn't really get it. Well, he gets that Charlie is threatening him to protect someone he cares about, and he gets that Charlie would be particularly inclined to give advice about falling out of love; what he doesn't get is what he is supposed to do if he ever, somehow, inconceivably, stops loving Bella. He cannot plan for that. He has no idea how or why he ever would. But he is pretty sure, regardless, that Charlie Swan's vague threats would continue to mean nothing to him.
[He doesn't know that you have magic powers - or at least has no details,] Bella says. [The fact that he can't really do anything to you isn't something that occurred to him. I think what you're supposed to do if you fall out of love with me - according to him - is let me down easy.]
Problems like rains of jelly beans and things being on fire that probably shouldn't.
[No, he wouldn't shoot you. More like watch you and be sure to catch you if you do something illegal. I know you don't drive, at the moment, but if a cop wants to pull a driver over, they have to follow the average person for two minutes before a genuine traffic violation will appear. There are probably similar things in other domains. He might look into the prostitution accusation,] she adds thoughtfully. [If he were really pissed off.]
Pause.
[I'm not going to tell you my plan for what happens if you go rogue.]
Bella is smart. She probably has a better plan than he himself could come up with. Also, she can read his mind, and will continue to be able to read his mind even if he stops wanting her to.
But anything he can think of that she might use to stop him from wrecking things - wishing herself a pain power and hurting him until he sits down; killing him outright - are things that he thinks it would be fun to talk about, and wouldn't defend against, unless he fell out of love with pain when he fell out of love with Bella. And he has been in love with pain for much, much longer. He has no idea what could possibly make him stop loving Bella, but he admits it could happen; he could not stop loving pain and stay himself in any meaningful way. It is a fundamental part of his life in a way that very few things are.
Pause.
[How easy you are to incapacitate with a pain power might afford... testing,] she tosses out.
Also, if she thinks telling him her plan will either make him fall in love with her all over again or hate her forever, he thinks it will definitely be the first one. But he doesn't expect that to change her mind, so he won't bug her about it, or dwell on it any longer.
[Are you going to make a new lair near Stanford or just a door to your current one?]
[Dunno,] he says, and considers the question. [Depends if I find a really good place to put a lair that's close enough to wherever you'll be. It's probably way easier to stick a magic door somewhere.]
And by the way, just how hypothetical was that offhand reference to testing out incapacitating him with a pain power? Because he is all for that. Anytime she wants. Yes please.
Pause.
And then because he has such entertaining reactions: [Gosh, I wonder if a hex-made Cruciatus Curse power will even come with a ceiling, if I don't install one on purpose. I think maybe I won't.]
Yes. Tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning is good.
Also, he is heading upstairs right now to go take a shower, and if Bella doesn't want to witness the aftermath of her obvious and very successful attempt to gratuitously turn him on, she might want to quit reading him before he gets there. Or not. Her call.
Alice decides that is going to change.
He closes and locks the bathroom door behind him with a triangle and gets in the shower with all his clothes on, because he doesn't care enough about them to save them and doesn't want to waste any time taking them off. Another triangle turns on the shower to a not-quite-scalding temperature, and as the spray hits his face he closes his eyes and sets himself on fire.
His clothes are ash swirling down the drain. If his flight power didn't default to hover, he'd fall down. He pours hexagons; the chain looped around him lengthens noticeably. Alice stands under the water and burns. And as he bites through his lip trying not to scream, he imagines it's Bella doing this to him, Bella making him hurt more than he has ever hurt in his life. Fuck, he loves her so much.
He runs burning hands down his burning chest and pulls the fire deeper, closer, hotter. Keeping it burning while the shower continually tries to put it out is hardly even an effort. He's not sure he has any skin left. He's not sure he cares. It hurts incredibly.
And then, finally, he puts out the fire and wraps his hand around his dick while they are both still healing. That, and the shower spray hitting his burned-raw chest without any of it boiling off first, is a whole new universe of pain. The rest of his skin growing back is almost anticlimactic in comparison, although under other circumstances that alone would probably be enough to give him a spontaneous orgasm.
Healing is over in a flat second, and so is Alice. He drops to his knees and takes a deep breath just to feel it in his lungs, presses his hands against the (now somewhat filthy) shower floor, as he slowly regains awareness of his body through senses other than pain. Water running down his back. The taste of blood and char. The smell of smoke and steam.
When he hauls the new loop of his necklace up from where it dangles insubstantially through the floor, he is not surprised at all to see that the parade of hexagons ends in three glimmering black stars.
[Okay,] he says happily. He reaches up to run his hands through his hair, only to discover that he no longer has any. A square fixes that. He also, running his hands over his back and sides, discovers that all his scars are gone—burned away and healed back clean.
He is not sure how he feels about that part.
He runs his hand along the line of new hexagons, clicking them together, and then counts the points of the stars with his fingertips. It's really something, having these physical manifestations of pain.
(She meant something else with that pause, he's sure, but—she did help, in a way. She was absolutely a part of that experience, and not just because she was watching. It was for her and about her even if it wasn't with her.)
What he meant by it was: there are things that are intense, and glorious because they're so intense, but by the same token too intense to make a casual part of your daily routine. Cutting a half-dozen hexagons out of himself is a casual part of his daily routine by now; this never will be. But it's still something he likes and wants and would hate to miss out on.
She pauses, then says, [You realize that a primary benefit of the pain power will be the ability to jack up volume for when I can start doing big obvious things like curing malaria, so ideally that wouldn't bother you. But you already pour out way more coins than I could reasonably ask of anyone, so if it does I'll see about getting creative. It's possible that I could just render mosquitoes extinct without damaging the ecology too much, if not with a direct kill-the-bugs wish then with a designer virus or something.]
He suspects, though, that he's going to like it even more when she does it. And he already liked it a lot.
Humming to himself, he gets up and turns off the shower.
Pause. [And I could know what it was like, sort of, if I opened up the memory - just have no reason to do that.]
It'd be kind of weird if her mind-reading managed to miss the quality of that experience. But Alice finds that he can't even really figure out whether it was a thought or a feeling or what. It's important, he knows that much. Maybe it wasn't something he thought at the time, but only occurred to him later?
Ecstatic submersion in experience bursts across Bella's mind like a paintball to the gut. It's crushing and drowning and utterly fantastic.
It doesn't last forever. [If there was a drug that did that, it would be illegal and everyone would take it anyway,] Bella opines.
[That's a word for it, yes. Say, as long as I'm designing the power - I'm inventing arbitrary units so I can compare various instances of it with each other, and so on - remember the test with the square? That was just - plain. Would you like the power to be not-plain? Come in various flavors? Like ice cream.]
(And he is not totally sure that she really wants him to start listing ways he likes to hurt, because it is all about the details, and Bella has historically seemed to think the details are kind of gross. Also, it gets pretty sexual in a lot of ways, but that seems to be less of a problem now.)
Let's see. There's heat, obviously. Cold. Acid. Is base meaningfully different? Meh, she includes it as its own thing; may as well. Electricity. Various flavors of more mechanical injury - cuts, bludgeons, puncture wounds, crushing, tearing, cramping, scraping. She's not sure how some of these will scale up, but magic is very good at that sort of thing.
And she includes "plain", too.
[Ah, so we're not going vanilla-chocolate-strawberry here, you want mango gelato with coconut flakes too.] Bella goes back to her mental list and adds shades of nuance. If Alice sees a meaningful difference between being incinerated in a furnace and branded with a soldering iron he may as well be allowed to enjoy those fine distinctions.