« Back
Generated:
Post last updated:
Sharply punctuated equilibrium
Jonathan is eaten by an alien
Permalink Mark Unread

The year 2035 is blessed by the bounty of technological advances, in the middle of an intellectual renaissance. Machines that mimic consciousness and have expansive hard drives of information to draw on to better provide for their human charges, games that a user can plug into and experience first hand, a space elevator that can take ordinary people up to orbit. New (ludicrously expensive) tech from TranStar, apparently lauded as a way to download new skills into a human's brain. Languages, talents, skills learned over a lifetime - all allegedly within reach to someone that pays enough. It's not very clear whether these new 'Neuromods' are the beginning to a brighter future, or if they might just drive all of their users insane, but TranStar sure seems proud of themselves.

From here, though, the wonders of human achievement feel very far away. Just the wonders of the quiet woods, the soothing sound of rustling leaves and birdsong, and a quiet path stretching out before anyone who walks it.

Permalink Mark Unread

One man walks this path.

(It's Sunday afternoon and that means Monday is coming up far too soon, but at least he's managing to return to civilization and not to “ugh, civilization.”)

Permalink Mark Unread

It's a pretty nice summer day; it rained recently, so it's not too hot outside. The clouds are clearing up, it looks like Monday will be a bright and sunny day.

... Or maybe not. The light from the sky noticeably darkens, like a cloud's rolled over the sun. Maybe his weather app's prediction was wrong.

Permalink Mark Unread

Huh, interesting weather.

He keeps an eye out for a break in the treetops to scan the sky as he walks under it.

Permalink Mark Unread

The sky...

... is not supposed to be that dark. Not even if the weather apps were wrong. At first it seems like it's just more leaves from the trees overhead, but it definitely doesn't move like leaves. It's darker and wispier than cloud cover, and moving far faster, seething in the sky like a dark black swarm. Locusts seems the most obvious answer, but locusts arrive in a large all consuming cloud. This looks like - like black swirling smoke that's gained a mind of its own.

Whatever it is, it's getting bigger. Or, more accurately, getting closer.

Permalink Mark Unread

 

 

— okay he pulls out his TranScribe and turns off the do-not-disturb-me-unless-the-sky-is-falling option and checks if anyone is reporting that the sky is falling.

Permalink Mark Unread

It hasn't hit the sky is falling level of emergency just yet, this being why his TranScribe hasn't chimed at him, but wow do these posts on Chatter look like they might be really worried that the sky might be about to fall. Or, to be more specific, that some sort of cloud from space just entered Earth's atmosphere and is currently descending upon the north-eastern part of North America. According to these linked sources from trusted scientists, it course corrected itself mid-descent well enough that it's either intelligent or run by something that is. The associated trajectories are aimed towards large population centers. Various countries are all insisting that it wasn't them, Chatter has organized corroborating evidence in the form of how they are all also freaking out and organizing their own defenses for his perusal if he'd like to read it.

His TranScribe chimes at him and says he should please make his way to the nearest building and stay away from any windows. Here is a map of where precisely the major concentrations of the cloud are, updating in real time, please be careful if located in the major concentrations of the cloud. They are mostly centered around major population centers; his place in the woods seems to be mostly out of the line of fire. Updates will continue as the situation progresses.

Permalink Mark Unread

Do they have any advice suitable for people who are not actually in major population centers already.

Permalink Mark Unread

Return to any owned vehicles and take shelter inside if applicable, be aware of nearby shelter locations and methods of transport if not. Stay away from the concentrations of whatever it is, listed here, do not return to population centers just to get inside. Try to find an inside that is not near the concentrations of whatever it is. In short, not really. Just common sense.

His TranScribe chews on these nonspecific and obviously canned governmental instructions for a few seconds, then spits out a route from the trailhead that will get him away from the major population centers with minimal fuss or risk. Updating in real time, of course. Also a few out of the way buildings to hide if he'd like that, instead.

Permalink Mark Unread

He feels like he ought to revise this neatly laid out plan out of some sort of principle but this is not the time for vaguely defined principles.

He continues at a slightly faster but still sensible pace. Sometimes looking up at the sky.

Permalink Mark Unread

The black swarm cloud soon fades from the sky.

His TranScribe starts chiming regular updates. Here's a video of a small smokey black four-limbed spider-like creature scurrying on the ceiling. Here's a message on Chatter saying to avoid these creatures if at all possible, they are definitely hostile towards humans. Here's a video on a reputable news site, behind a graphic content warning. In it, another small spider-like creature leaps at a man and attaches itself to his face. It shoves a tendril down his throat (the person behind the camera screams and the video starts correcting for the shaking as the person starts running) and the man shudders and shrivels like a raisin. The video shows what looks like four of the little creatures crawling out of his corpse before the video cuts out entirely. Advice on how to deal with these creatures pending, please stand by.

Permalink Mark Unread

Permalink Mark Unread

After a pause: firearms are not recommended, too small and fast to easily aim at. Sharp objects are better but not great. Large blunt object are best, preferably a heavy one that is easily swung. Recommended items: baseball bat, dictionary, a wrench, an operator...

Here's a map of where the concentrations of cloud were, here are the areas at risk highlighted in various shades of red. There are reports of things other than the four-legged spiders, but nothing as concrete as the video, please send in any and all footage acquired as soon as possible.

The trailhead's still a ways away.

Permalink Mark Unread

 

He stops by likely-looking fallen branches and logs and strips and trims and shaves and tests pieces for strength and weight distribution and comfortable grip.

Shortly, he has two “clubs” and a “staff” of reasonably good quality for hurried improvisations from found materials. Whether he'll actually be able to use them for anything more worthwhile than dropping them and running is another question.

Permalink Mark Unread

These look like they will be decent weapons against the unknown menace! At least in the form he's confirmed the existence of.

His TranScribe continues slowly dripping him information. Warning: the creatures are sneaky and have a habit of using ambush tactics. Keep eyes open for anything suspicious. These are the cities that have the largest swarms (New York, Philadelphia, Washington DC, and Montreal) - please stay far far away from them. The creatures seem to be drawn to larger population centers, and aren't interested in much else besides human life. There's a section on how much of the United States' government has been eaten already, if he's interested.

Permalink Mark Unread

Cities: sure, no problem, already not going to do that. Human life: currently minimum.

Government: too slow — well, what's the military up to?

Suspicious: like what?

Permalink Mark Unread

The military's been caught off guard but is adjusting as quickly as can be expected; not a lot of information is clear on what precisely they're doing, the TranScribe doesn't actually have access to military orders and the like. From scattered posts and vague statements, it scrapes up the assertion that a major counter offensive is in the works, but hasn't been enacted yet. More concretely, they've set up a few safezones outside of the major cities that are accepting refugees from the cities and surrounding areas.

Apparently the creatures have a habit of hiding in ordinary objects. Or - no, no, that's not right at all, here's a video showing one of them shapeshifting from a chair. They are hiding as ordinary objects.

The trailhead's just up ahead. The obnoxious lights of the vending machines are recognizable anywhere, possibly from space.

Permalink Mark Unread

They are of a questionable design in many ways, the most recent addition being that landmarks visible from space may be targets — but apparently aren't this time around. He purchases replacements for everything he used up over the past day, and then some more. And a bag to carry the some more in.

Then it's to the first available car and attempting to fit his two bags and three sticks into the vehicle in a way that he can remove them in a hurry — or leave them all behind, if that seems needful.

TranScribe goes in the control pocket. Let's get moving.

Permalink Mark Unread

The car zips down the road, following his TranScribe's directives. For a few minutes, it's a surprisingly boring car ride, though his TranScribe is sure to keep it interesting with harrowing updates about the inky critters and how North America's handling them.

The updates on the critters are sparse, and the updates on how North America's handling them are harrowing. Humanity's not doing very well, and the critters are everywhere and seem to be breeding rapidly from their remains. Advice is still to remain in your home if you're already there, but a lot of people on Chatter are panicking and don't seem to be staying in their homes.

Permalink Mark Unread

He will take fewer updates on the fate of the country and more on his immediate vicinity, thanks. Apparently the greatest in modern personal information technology still hasn't managed to figure out his preferences or sensible management of human attention under emergency.

Permalink Mark Unread

It tries its best! But it shuts up about the fate of the country when he tells it to. It (as sheepishly as a non-sapient device can) offers to play soothing music that fits the pretty scenery between immediate vicinity updates?

Permalink Mark Unread

Intellectually, he knows it's quite ridiculous, but he has rather a different mood in mind.

Permalink Mark Unread

It can play that mood of music, yep.

Immediate vicinity updates are scarce, but apparently everyone's decided to name these things the 'Typhon,' according to some information from a TranStar employee. There's a lot of fluttering about what this means about the company and if they had anything to do about it, but his TranScribe mostly filters that out for not being about his immediate vicinity.

Permalink Mark Unread

Bleh. Conspiracy theories (or, y'know, actual Evil Megacorporation-Whose-Equipment-He-Is-Using Betrayal) while the emergency is going on. Wonderful. His recommended destination is still a good choice, right? For that matter, does it seem like a good choice to him, not just his TranScribe? (Not that he really believes …)

Permalink Mark Unread

It looks like a good choice from the information his TranScribe is giving him, at least as far as he can tell.

But then, maybe it was lying to him, because shortly after he checks, something large and fast hits the side of the car and sends it swerving off the road and into a tree.

Permalink Mark Unread

Permalink Mark Unread

 

The wind's a bit knocked out of him, but the airbag and the seatbelt did their jobs and he's relatively unharmed by the crash. Unfortunately, there is now an airbag in his face that makes it hard to see what's going on. The windshield's cracked, the front of the car is wrapped around a tree, and his TranScribe is flashing a bright red warning message.

It's not immediately clear where the thing that hit his car is.

Permalink Mark Unread

okay so thing that can smash car can smash him, but thing that can smash car can smash car again —

Does his TranScribe have any helpful advice. No, it is just telling him that yes there are Typhon in his vicinity. Okay. Grab TranScribe. Wriggle into backpack (thank you extra adjustable car seat). Grab sticks. Check all windows and mirrors. Mentally rehearse next actions.

Yank ‘driver’ door open and attempt a not-very-stick-hindered quick exit.

Permalink Mark Unread

It's not immediately obvious where the Typhon that wrecked his car is - it's certainly not waiting outside of the door for him.

Permalink Mark Unread

This is not an investigation, this is a sprint towards the nearest tree. He's only listening for what might be behind him.

He steps sideways to have the tree be cover from anything immediately behind and spins around to take a look.

Permalink Mark Unread

Nothing chases after him; there are some odd quietly clanking sounds, but that's it.

When he goes to look, there's a dark shape slithering under the hood of his car. It doesn't seem particularly interested in him right now.

Permalink Mark Unread

Let's just keep going away. Perpendicular to the road. (Is this one perhaps here, which is not a populated area, because people — or cars — go on roads?)

Eventually he pulls out his TranScribe and sees if it has non-vehicular advice.

Permalink Mark Unread

It does! It wants him to go thataway, apparently there's a ranger's station it wants to send him to hide in.

Permalink Mark Unread

It's not like he's got better ideas.

Permalink Mark Unread

His walk is...

... surprisingly uneventful, actually. No Typhon show up out of the wilderness to eat him. The walk itself is a bit difficult without an actual trail, but his TranScribe directs him to one after about two hours, and after that it's much easier. It's practically a pleasant nature walk.

Permalink Mark Unread

Anyone have useful updates on Typhon behavior, like “they will go for lone cars on country roads”?

Permalink Mark Unread

The internet is pretty puzzled by them now, actually. Some of them are definitely shapeshifters that masquerade as ordinary objects, but everything else seems to be conflicting information and wild speculation and a whole lot of panic! Aaaa! Panic!! They control minds they control tech they're made from people they teleport they control fire aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

No useful updates on behavior in particular, however.

Permalink Mark Unread

…and definitely no “here's what you should do to Fight Back Or Ensure The Survival Of Humanity”, right?

Oh look a building.

Permalink Mark Unread

Nope, it doesn't look like anyone's quite sure how to fight these things.

Oh look! A building!

The ranger station is deserted, but past the generic looking sitting area, there's a tiny kitchenette with some food, a little nook of a bedroom, and a full bathroom. It looks like a decent enough place to hide from the apocalypse.

Permalink Mark Unread

Really deserted? Because the last time he did the obvious thing he got ambushed neatly and maybe they're targeting all kinds of places where humans go. He'll take some time to walk around quietly to look (in the fading light) and listen carefully for any black slithery monsters. Or suspicious chairs. Suspicious chairs can get poked with the five-foot pole.

Permalink Mark Unread

Some of the chairs in the lounge in the front are a bit awkwardly placed, but they don't leap into black slithery monsters that ambush him upon being poked. More likely that it's messy from people moving the chairs around in unpredictable ways.

The rest of the station is just as innocuous. It seems the Typhon might have overlooked this place.

Permalink Mark Unread

Okay.

There isn't exactly any readily available way of making the place more defensible.

He'll —

see if the internet has anything useful if he pokes around with his own brain instead of silicon substitutes.

Permalink Mark Unread

In the internet's humble opinion:

AAAAA THE WORLD IS ENDING THE WORLD IS ENDING THEY HAVE BEEN SPOTTED IN EUROPE AAA THE WORLD IS ENDING.

But also here are some conflicting tips from lots of sources for how to fight the Typhon. Blunt instruments work well (except when they don't, which is often), shotguns come highly recommended, except someone is insisting that a taser was way more useful - someone recommends dumping all of your electronics because they're after them, someone else is trying to compile a tidy list of the Typhon types but they're having some trouble and haven't updated the list in the past two hours...

There's useful information to be found, but there's a lot to sift through.

Permalink Mark Unread

Sift.

Move some not-particularly-important gadgets off his person and into other rooms. (He's not going to give up the TranScribe just yet.)

Sift.

No, he does not have the skill or energy to rearrange the station's wall paneling to board up the windows at the cost of exposing an unused room to the outside.

Think in circles.

Go to bed.

Think in tighter circles.

—whimper

—zzz.

Permalink Mark Unread

 


While he's sleeping, something carefully leverages open the window and slides into the room.

Permalink Mark Unread

—zzz—

Permalink Mark Unread

Well.

He is soon pinned to the bed by something large, heavy, and inky black.

Permalink Mark Unread

— "AAAH"thatisnotausefuluseofbreathPUSHthatdoesn'tworkATTEMPTTOGRABSTICKfail.

Permalink Mark Unread

The Typhon sure does find it helpful that he opened his mouth to scream! It helps him keep doing that, in that it begins shoving itself down his throat.

Permalink Mark Unread

Okay fine the screaming can retreat to his brain.

 

Boy there's a lot of it.