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The thing Towa misses the most from his life before is the nightmares.
There's a part of him that finds this inane thought kind of funny, the part of him that isn't currently screaming after being woken up from one by Fujieda, shaking in a cold sweat. It's kind of funny because the reason he misses them is that they were a lot less bad than these. Plus, he never used to remember them. Back then, he'd wake up in a cold sweat but usually not screaming, and he wouldn't remember any of it, and after his first drink and cigarette of the day the only lingering effect would've been the slightly raised heart rate and, perhaps, some irritability or moodiness from not having slept enough.
Nowadays, he remembers all of his nightmares in vivid detail. It doesn't help that a lot of them borrow strongly from his actual memories; even when there's some remixing, he can always pick out which individual event from his past inspired each scene.
So, yeah, it's kind of funny that he misses his old nightmares, and that the reason that that is the case is because his nightmares now are worse.
